Disarm

Disarm you with a smile

You always knew how to make me do a double take. Whenever you smiled, I felt as though the world was coming to an end. God, that sounds awful. But I meant it. It has always felt like that for me, like the world will end if you stop smiling.

Please don't stop smiling. I want to say this, and I don't want you to cry, or get angry, or do anything. I just want you to listen.

You know I'd do anything for you, don't you?

And cut you like you want me to

You do. You always have known. And whenever I was sad, or worried, or nervous or stressed out or whatever you were always there to make me feel better. Just by being yourself!

Cut that little child

I wish you'd realise the extent of what I would do for you. It's like...every part of everything I have done since I've known you has been for you! Whenever I played Quidditch, it was for you. Every win, every victory I dedicated to you in my head.

Inside of me and such a part of you

Did you ever do the same for me? Every top mark you got was for me? Or every time you clobbered Malfoy in the face? You know, at one stage I was so worried that you loved him. You always found it so much easier to get angry with him than me. But then again, I know now that you don't. Even lust wouldn't make you hex someone to the point that they turn into a mutated slug.

Ooh, the years burn

All these years I have hidden how I feel. I've covered it, so afraid of how you'd react. I was ashamed even! You were always like a sister to me, and you just don't have these kinds of feelings for a sister, do you? It burned every time I saw you. I used to watch you, you know. Even as an eleven-year-old kid, I loved the way your hair moved. Yes, even when it was bushy I loved it. And your eyes...like hazel wood...and more magical than any wand.

I used to be a little boy
So old in my shoes

Eleven-year-olds know nothing of love. I know that now. But can a seventeen-year old say it? I don't even know for certain if this is the real thing, all I know is that something is driving me to tell you this.

And what I choose is my choice

You cannot choose who you love, I know that now. If I could, I would have loved one of the Patil twins, or Lavender, or even Blaise Zabini in Slytherin. But I couldn't. I tried to, to make myself forget about you, you know? But they were all like ice cream sundaes...they look fantastic, and have you foaming at the mouth when you think about them...but like ice-cream, they were cold, and melted away faster than I could savour them. You...you have always been the guiding hand, the warm fire I return home to, and the one that I can always trust.

What's a boy supposed to do?

I don't know if you feel the same way. I don't expect you to. All I need to do is get this off my chest. I can't stand this silent suffering any more! What was I supposed to do? Stand back, and admire you from afar like some poxy Greek poem? I can't live like that, and if you feel the same then I know you can't either.

The killer in me is the killer in you...my love

It kills me when I think of you being hurt, or you being sad...or being away from me. I want you by my side always, and somehow I think that you feel the same. I think that maybe it kills you, too.

I send this smile over to you

I have to smile now. I love your smile so much. Ever since you sneakily asked Madam Pomfrey to shrink them smaller than normal, your smile has made you dazzling. I mean, you were so pretty before, but now you are absolutely breathtaking. Oh, God...I sound so mushy!

Disarm you with a smile

Your smile always disarms me too. Without your smile, I don't know where I'd be. At one stage, I thought that you couldn't stand me. That hurt. It hurt so, so much that I spent a whole night sobbing in the girls' toilets. I didn't even know why it hurt so badly...I couldn't admit it to myself. And then you two came to my rescue, and fought off a troll for me! Like a knight on horseback...and you became one, didn't you? In that chess game? I don't know if you'd remember - after all, you were very concussed.

And leave you like they left me here

You never left me alone. Even when you and Harry had that huge fight in fourth year, you stayed by my side. Admittedly, at the time, I felt that I was being substituted for Harry, and vice versa. You both wanted my company, even when you didn't want each other's.

To wither in denial

I tried to hide it too. Whenever I saw you, my heart skipped a beat and my skin shivered and the room went fuzzy...and I convinced myself...I convinced myself that it was joy at seeing one of my best friends in the world...one of the very best!

The bitterness of one who's left alone

I rejected my parents so many, many times so I could be with you two. But you, Ron, you most of all. I spent maybe a fortnight with Mum and Dad, and then I'd go to the Burrow. I needed you. I needed to see you...

Ooh, the years burn

All these years...and I had myself fooled...we are soul mates, and I had myself convinced that we weren't!

Ooh, the years burn, burn, burn...!

...oh, God...this is the reason why girls shouldn't do this!

I used to be a little boy

I know...I didn't need you to say a word, but now that you have...

So old in my shoes

...I've realise I've needed you to say it all along...

And what I choose is my voice

What's a boy supposed to do?

...and I'm so glad I decided to voice it at last, so glad that you feel the same way!

The killer in me is the killer in you...my love

You were right...it always killed me when I was away from you. And now I think I'm dying because I'm not touching you, I'm not close to you...I'm so far away from you...

I send this smile over to you

...so here's a smile to tide you over...

The killer in me is the killer in you

...until we can touch each other again...

Send this smile over to you

...and we can be together.

The killer in me is the killer in you

I love you, Hermione Granger.

Send this smile over to you

I love you, too, Ronald Weasley.

The killer in me is the killer in you

If I don't say this I think I might die...so...here it goes. Hermione, will you make me the happiest man alive, and give me that smile every morning when I wake, and every night when I fall asleep? Will you do me the greatest honour of my life - make me prouder than any king! - and marry me?

Send this smile over to you

Of course I will. I love you, Ron Weasley.