Lover, You Should've Come Over

LOVER, YOU SHOULD'VE COME OVER

Written in tribute to the loving memory of
JEFF BUCKLEY
1966-1997
R.I.P.

And also written in loving memory of
SIRIUS BLACK

Gone forever, but forgotten? Never.

The woman watched the funeral sadly from over-bright eyes. Tears spilled from her eyes as she pressed play on an old CD. As the opening chords strummed softly, she spoke to the empty air, not expecting an answer, but talking nevertheless.

Looking out the door I see the rain fall upon the funeral mourners

It's a sad day for so many people. But not you and me, my love.

Even though you're not with me, I feel a curious sense of love.

Parading in a wake of sad relations as their shoes fill up with water

The rain falls like their tears.

Why do they weep? This is a day of joy, a day of happiness for all!

Harry Potter has vanquished the Dark Lord, and the nameless terror that has plagued us is dead forever.

Brave little Harry...you and I both love him, don't we? I hope he has a long and happy life.

If anyone deserves that, it's him.

And maybe I'm too young to keep good love from going wrong

Poor Lily and James. I loved them like my own family. In so many ways they were family to us while we were together. But now they are dead, and I cannot stop thinking about them.

Was there something I could have done to save them?

Was there something I could have done to save you?

But tonight you're on my mind so you never know

Questions like these prey on my mind like leeches in murky waters...but I am glad for every memory I have of you.

Your face...your eyes...oh, such eyes!

I could have drowned in those eyes, watching me so peacefully every time we made love, or even just spoke.
When I'm broken down and hungry for your love with no way to feed it

Right now, I'm feeling lonely. I hunger and thirst for you every second of every day...your absence from my life is like losing a limb or, an eye.

I'm still here, I still function...but I am not whole.

I can't do anything as I used to do.

I could do anything with you by my side, beloved.

Where are you tonight, child you know how much I need it

Sirius, you were my soul mate. Nothing in the world could have driven me from your side.

Not even Azkaban. All the time you were imprisoned there I felt a stab of hunger for you. I visited you sometimes at night, knowing that the mere sight of your face would nourish me.

Too young to hold on and too old to just break free and run

Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I were to just up and leave. Run away and cast off my past life like a snake shedding its skin, and build a new existence for myself.

And that's what it would be - an existence, not a life.

Without you, my world is empty.

But I feel as though I am wasting my life here, staying in this big old empty house and wandering from room to room, calling your name and feeling more than a little sorry for myself.

Sometimes a man gets carried away, when he feels like he should be having his fun

I occasionally think of holding a party, and inviting all of our old friends. But who is left?

Remus, and Dumbledore, and Mad-Eye.

And myself, of course, long forgotten, but never forgetting.

And much too blind to see the damage he's done

I wonder if any of the others knew what they did to me?

When you were sent to Azkaban, I supported you. They turned on me, said I was supporting a traitor, a turncoat, and that I in turn was one.

But, now your godson, Harry Potter, has avenged you.

Sometimes a man must awake to find that really, he has no one

I hid away in our home, pining for you and inhaling the trace scent of you on your robes, on your pillow, in our bed...

I even played your favourite songs, like the Weird Sisters, and those other wizard-only groups you loved. I preferred Jeff Buckley, and you even admitted that you liked that song of his, 'Lover, You Should've Come Over'.

It was our song in a way, wasn't it?

So I'll wait for you... and I'll burn

Right now I'm wearing one of your old shirts. It's ridiculously large on me, I know, but it still smells a little like you.

Will I ever see your sweet return?

I have a cutout of your picture in the Daily Prophet mounted on my wall. It was the only photo I could find of you anywhere. I try to speak to it, but this version of you, this empty shell stares blankly into space, blinking lazily.

Oh will I ever learn

When will I learn to let the past go? Or better still, when will I learn to be content with just a memory of you, a recollection of the love we once shared?

Oh lover, you should've come over

This love that filled every room with light and laughter...the love that made Lily and James' pale in comparison!

'Cause it's not too late

But it's too late now to regret them.

Lonely is the room, the bed is made, the open window lets the rain in

The funeral has passed around the corner. It was a grievous blow to our side to have lost Hagrid, too. I saw Harry walking by...he looks so much like James it frightens me.

I have to close the window...the rain is getting in...that's better.

Burning in the corner is the only one who dreams he had you with him

It's so cold in this house without you. Am I the only one left who still dreams of you, who still longs for your arms and mouth and face?

Were you the only one who remembered me at all?

Am I truly the only person in the world who knows that I am alive?

My body turns and yearns for a sleep that won't ever come

Oh, let me die then! Let me be with you again, let me walk by your side!

This is too cruel...let this sleep come, the final sleep that will reunite me with you...

It's never over, my kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder

This life of mine never ends.

It's never over, all my riches for her smiles when I slept so soft against her

This longing for you is never complete.

It's never over, all my blood for the sweetness of her laughter

I would do anything to hear you laugh again...

It's never over; she's the tear that hangs inside my soul forever

But it will not happen...my tears will not bring you to life and return you to my ever open, ever-loving arms.

Well maybe I'm just too young

I was too young to have fallen so in love with you...to fall so deeply in love with anyone!

To keep good love from going wrong

But ours was the greatest love, the strongest bond, I had ever encountered!

Oh... lover, you should've come over

Oh, Sirius...when will you return to me? I considered hurrying my own death, just to be with you.

'Cause it's not too late

But then I realised - you would not want that. So, here I am. I'm waiting for you...

Well I feel too young to hold on

I cannot hold on much longer for you...

And I'm much too old to break free and run

I am weary of this world, of this life.

It belongs to the young heroes who conquered He Who Must Not Be Named.

Too deaf, dumb, and blind to see the damage I've done

Will you now deny me, Sirius? I have never harmed anyone, not even myself.

Sweet lover, you should've come over

My sweet Sirius...what is happening to me? I feel so...sleepy...

Oh, love well I'm waiting for you

I will lie down and sleep now. Hopefully I will dream of you, and in my dreams I will find solace from my living void.

Lover, you should've come over

...I hope you'll come...I wish you would return...

Cause it's not too late

...Sirius...

The woman lay still on her bed, and sat up moments later.

Light filled her room, and joy she had once known flooded her system like hot tea.

Sirius stood before her, more beautiful than she had ever recalled seeing him, and he wore that smile, the smile she loved and remembered so well.

'It is your time at last, darling,' he said softly, his voice sending shivers through her body.

'I knew you would come...' she breathed happily, gliding into his arms.

Her body drew a last, drawn-out breath, exhaled, and froze.

She was dead at last, but in death she had found him again.

And with him were all those she had loved and lost - Lily, James, Rubeus, her parents and grandparents, siblings and every other person who had ever mattered to her.

She had waited, and not in vain.

All good things to those who wait, and perhaps the final repose, and Heaven, are the best things to wait for.