The Devil May Care

The Devil May Care

By Dimgwrthien

Sitting back at the house, Remus washed his hand several times with freezing water, trying to stop the constant burning. Sirius watched him closely, finally wrapping his hand with a cloth after rubbing several salves onto it.

Harry woke up soon after. He walked into the kitchen, yawning with his eyes still unfocused.

“Sleep well, Harry?” Sirius asked as he finished with Remus’ hand and stood up to grab Harry’s breakfast that was still under a heating charm.

“Alright, I guess,” he muttered, sitting down at the table. “What time is it?”

“Nearing ten, I think,” Remus answered, smoothing the bandages and placing his hand under the table so that Harry would not ask anything. ”I think we were all tired. It’s alright to sleep late.”

Harry shrugged. “Just surprised it’s so late. What did you two do?” he asked, glancing at Sirius and giving him a strange look. Remus saw that there was still flecks of snow in his hair and nervously brushed the ones he supposed were in his own hair out.

“We were checking at Hogwarts,’ Sirius answered, sitting down and handing Harry his plate. Harry started eating as he nodded. “ha something to tell Minerva.”

“What was it?”

Sirius glanced at Remus, who answered, “Just a message to pass on.”

Harry seemed to find that a good explanation as he did not questions them anymore.

“Is anything going on today?” he asked instead, still stabbing at the food on his plate.

“I don’t think so,” Sirius answered. “Everything’s going to be quiet and a bit… tough for a while. We can’t let you out with protection.”

Harry’s hand jumped to his waist, but Sirius told him, “Even we can’t get much past the Death Eaters. You saw them already, you know what they can do.”

Harry’s brow furrowed as he thought. “Who was that man?” he asked. “the one who talked to you, Remus.”

Remus felt some of the blood drain from his face. “Remember when I told you that not all werewolves are good people?” he asked.

“This better now be -” Harry started, sighing.

“That was the one who bit me,” Remus cut in. “I had already said it. Everything was planned out. He was the one who did it.”

“You know, Remus,” Sirius started, “you never did tell us what your father did to upset that bloke.”

It was Remus’ turn to sigh. “He… he had been out a bit before Voldemort really started to rise. Voldemort was going after anyone he could, including werewolves, a few people knew that. My father was asked to do something… I’m not sure what, however. It was an old Death Eater who asked him to. When he refused, Greyback was offended by some comment he made while rejecting it and came after my father. He wasn’t there that night,” Remus remembered, thinking back to the night. It was fuzzy in his brain after years of ignoring it. “I was, and so was my mother. It was still early, of course. I was outside and…” Remus shrugged, facing the table. There was an absence of the fork on the plate and he knew that Harry was staring at him.

“Did he reject one of the Death Eaters?” Harry asked, sounding amazed and shocked.

“I’m not really sure if he did. It was over twenty years ago.”

In all truth, Remus could not remember a single thing from then. He knew that his parents had spoken alone with Silencing Charms around the room for hours the night before. On the night that it did happen, his father had left for the night, saying he had business at work. Remus believed it and went outside. The entire bite was still a mystery to him, though from what he knew of, he must have been unconscious for most of it. The image of his mother crying in the morning with his father there, looking both furious and terrified, still came to mind when he thought enough.

Sirius was silent for another moment. Then he said, “That’s… that’s why?” Remus nodded. “I thought it would be something horrible, like your father was a werewolf hunter.”

Remus smiled slightly, trying to bring the conversation away from the bite. “You met him, Sirius. Did he strike you as a person who would kill his own son?”

Grinning, Sirius answered, “No, he struck me more as the kind of man who would die nine times a year.” When he saw Harry’s confused look, he explained, “Remus is a dreadful liar. You know that. Blamed every absence on his parents. Even someone whose parents remarried seven times couldn’t have so many parents.”

Stifling a laugh and trying to look serious, Remus answered, “They were good enough lies, I think.”

Sirius snorted. That seemed to be his only answer.

“We’re going to have to do something about Danielle,” Harry said quietly. Remus and Sirius turned to face him. “We only moved her. She needs to be buried.”

Remus stood up. “I’ll - I’ll tell her family,” he murmured. “They should know. It won’t be too hard to track them down.”

Sirius nodded and made to stand, but Remus said, “I can do it myself. I’ll be back within an hour.”

The door was opened again and more chilly air blew in as Remus walked out. He closed his eyes and sucked in some of the bitterly cold air, Apparating into London, only feet from Danielle’s front door.

She had obviously locked the door with a simple Muggle lock as Remus was able to undo it with a spell. He walked inside, smelling a warm scent in his lungs. Cinnamon. A candle had obviously been burning but went out as the wax completely melted.

Remus tracked his way into the bedroom where the sheets were thrown around. She had not been able to clean up, clearly. Remus briefly wondered what she had gone to say to them when she was murdered.

On the table in the room was a small, green book with a Muggle pen next to it. Remus opened the book, seeing names in it. The first ones on the list had the surname of Truman, so Remus quickly memorized the address and started to leave. Before he did, however, he blew out the second candle he saw that was near expiration.

Apparating once more, Remus landed in front of a large house in a grassy area surrounded by snow. He had never been near the place before and examined it with interest before walking up to the white door and knocking loudly.

“Better not be you again -” came a grumpy voice as the door opened. An old man, most likely in his fifties, was standing in the doorway and giving Remus a curious look. He looked nothing like Danielle with his grey hair and brown eyes.

“Hullo,” the man greeted. “Could I do anything for you?”

Remus felt rather foolish, standing there with nothing to say. He did not want to say too much too early and scare the man, but he had the let the news out. “I have news about your daughter, Danielle.”

“She still coming?” he asked, sounding rather sad again. “Never was good company. Talked too much.”

He found his eyes traveling to the floor. “She’s - she was attacked,” he said in a lowered voice.

“Come in!” the man said suddenly, moving aside for Remus to walk in. The house looked old but well taken care of. The floors were gleaming as though with a fresh cleaning. “Carolyn! Carolyn, get down here!”

“Is it Danielle?” came another voice, sounding equally sad. “Oh dear, I told her that we were going to America for the -” The voice broke off as a woman walked in, seeing Remus. She looked exactly like Danielle except aged. Her brown hair was still showing only a small sign of grey and her green eyes rolled dramatically as she sighed. Remus could only guess that she was the witch of the two as she seemed to age slower. A chubby hand smacked her chest as she smiled. “Oh, good. She’s dreadful company!”

“I’ve heard,” Remus answered, not unkindly.

“He says he has news about her,” the man told her. “By the way, your name is -?”

“Remus Lupin,” he answered promptly.

“I’m Richard and this is Carolyn.”

Remus nodded in response to him.

“Tell us the news!” Carolyn said. “Did she move away? Get sick of spending long amounts of time with us?”

Closing his eyes, Remus murmured, “She was attacked by a Death Eater.”

Carolyn let out a small scream as Richard asked, “Aren’t those people gone now? Carolyn, you said they were -”

“They never left,” Remus explained carefully. “They’re always here, they were only laying low for a while.”

“How is she?” Carolyn asked cautiously.

“She died,” Remus answered. He opened his eyes to see Carolyn’s eyes start to redden as she cried. Richard looked numb and did not speak.

“What - what happened? Why her?” Carolyn asked, wiping her tears away frantically.

Remus sighed, not knowing where to begin. “She was helping myself and Harry Potter. Harry’s been wanted by Lord Volde - You-Know-Who,” he corrected with a small nod to Carolyn who shivered, “and she did all she could to help. We were in school together,” he added as an explanation. “When she came to visit, we weren’t there and she was attacked by a Death Eater. We - we have her body.” He felt stupid saying it. “For burial, if you want.”

Carolyn was crying loudly, her head resting on her tall husband’s chest as he remained there, eyes wide and unmoving.

“Can - can we please have her?” he asked, clearing his throat to speak louder. “Thank you for letting us know. It was very kind of you. Could I just ask… who, exactly killed her?”

Not wanting to blame Severus fought wanting to tell the truth. “Severus Snape did,” he replied.

Carolyn let out another wail before quieting enough to asked, “He’s - he’s the one who was in Azkaban and now’s he’s gone, right?”

Remus nodded as Richard let out a stream of swearwords. He patted his wife’s head, eyes closed and tears dripping down his nose.

“She was never good company,” Carolyn repeated, running a hand through her light hair. “I know I always said it, even in front of her. But I never wanted her to be killed!” She continued to cry into Richard’s shirt, staining it a darker color with tears. “I would give anything - anything - to have her back -”

“We all would, Mrs. Truman,” Remus told her quietly, not wanting to stay any longer. “She was a wonderful person.” He twisted his hands nervously. “Should I get -”

Richard nodded, patting his wife’s head once more and murmuring, “Thank you, Remus.”

Remus walked outside once more, closing the door as quietly as possible before Apparating back outside his own house. The cold of winter began to freeze his fingers as he opened the door into the welcomed warmth.

Sirius and Harry stood in the room, Sirius holding a large blanket with something inside. He looked up only when Remus entered.

“My best wishes to them,” he said quietly, handing the body over. Remus took it and saw that it was folded down a bit under her face so that he could see the pale freckles over the lifeless face. He nodded to the two again and Apparated, holding the bundle as tightly as possible.

Feeling a bit tired from the repeated Apparating, Remus knocked on the door again as best he could and heard another wail, a voice, and the door open. Richard stood inside and stared at Remus for a moment.

“Thank you for bringing her,” he said in an oddly constricted voice. He heard out his arms for Danielle and Remus handed her over. Richard’s eyes never left the girl’s face.

“Carolyn’s panicking about it,” he sighed. “I have no clue how this is going to be. Does - does this mean You-Know-Who’s back?”

“It might as well,” Remus answered truthfully. He looked at Danielle for the last time. “He’s only going to be strong while he has his followers.”

Leaving with a few more words, Remus Apparated back for the final time to see Harry sitting moodily on the chair nearest to the fireplace. Sirius was nowhere in sight.

“He wanted to just go back to bed and not bother with today,” Harry explained after Remus asked. “I want to, too. It’s fun to keep busy with anything but chores like I did with the Dursleys but -”

“You just want to be able to go outside and do anything?” Remus asked. Harry nodded, sighing and holding a pillow close to his chest. “Harry, I promise you that once Voldemort’s gone or just can’t get to you, you can do anything you want. As long as it’s legal, however.” He smiled but saw that Harry did not return it.

“Harry, listen to me. You’ve - you’ve been a grown-up since you got here. Everything’s been a bit hard and no one in the world can live without a childhood. We’re proud of you Harry. You’re wonderful and we both love you.” Harry did not turn to him but remained staring into the empty fireplace. “Think of everything this way: You’re special. Everyone in the world loves you for -”

“For losing my parents and having to be nearly killed every day?”

Remus shook his head, closing his eyes and letting Harry rest his head on his chest. “Everyone loves you for something you never wanted. But we love you because you’re you, Harry. You’ve come up with so many things and you’ve kept yourself safe, really. It’s alright to make mistakes. You can still be a kid and our savior of the Wizarding World.”

Harry smiled slightly. “A savior, now? What next? A king?”

Laughing, Remus placed a hand on Harry’s head, brushing his hair with his fingers. “Harry, I’m not going to tell you that your parents would be proud of you because you should already know that. Besides, I have no right to speak for them. All I’m going to tell you is that we’re proud of you. Especially me.”

Harry made a strange noise that sounded content. “Thanks, Remus.”

After about ten minutes of sitting there in silence, Remus felt Harry’s ribs push against his even slower than usual and knew that the child was asleep. Crawling out from under him without waking him proved to be hard, but Remus finally managed it and walked into the bedroom.

Sirius was sitting on the edge of the bed, a glass in one hand and a bottle resting near his foot.

“I noticed you had some Firewhiskey on you,” he said in an amused voice, raising the glass in a toast to Remus. “I was thirsty and wanted to become drunk, so I took it.”

“It obviously hasn’t worked very well,” Remus muttered, sitting down next to him. “You don’t seem drunk enough to be happy.”

“I am happy,” Sirius laughed, grinning at Remus. Maybe he was drunk. Something had changed over the years, that was sure. At school and after, Sirius had always gotten drunk in a fashion reminiscent of Remus after being force-fed Wolfsbane Potion. “I am in a state of delirium and cannot be happier no matter what.”

“I want to get drunk too,” Remus sighed, tempted to grab a glass. “Except there’s a child in the other room.”

Sirius did not seem to get the message. “If you’re not drunk, that’s good eno - enouth - enough.” He smiled again and waved the glass. “Hey, Rems, can you pass me another one of ‘em drinks?”

Remus took the bottle and held it protectively in his lap. “I think you’ve had enough, Sirius. If you have to poison yourself with something, do it with something useful.” He took Sirius’ glass and placed it upside down on the neck of the bottle he held then placed it back on the ground. “Like chocolate. Don’t think I’ve ignored yours and Harry’s stash in his room. He’s covered in it every time I see him.”

Sirius looked longingly at the bottle on the floor but shook his head. “Chocolate isn’t the same thing as this, Rems.”

“Don’t call me that,” Remus sighed. “Just make sure Harry doesn’t see you like this or he’ll think everything is falling apart.”

Personally, he wished he could join Sirius and become drunk himself. However, there was still chance of anything happening. Based on what had already gone on since the beginning of the previous month, there was no end to the possibilities.

“No one sees me,” Sirius sang, laughing once more. Remus quirked a smile of his own. “No one gets to see Sirius.”

Pushing Sirius backwards into the sheets, Remus whispered, “Just get some sleep or something for now. It may help you get sober faster.”

Sirius closed his eyes but was still talking. “I don’t wanna sleep now, Rems. I’m not tired.”

“You will be soon.”

“Will to you come sleep me with?” Sirius asked, mind already slipping into sleep as his words slurred into fragments of sentences.

Remus looked out the window where the sun did not cast any shadows. He guessed it was around noon. “I’ll sit here with you,” he answered. “Just until you fall asleep. Then I’m going back with Harry.”

Sirius’ breathing was already starting to slow as he wrapped a hand over Remus’ ear, pushing him down to the pillows. Remus let himself be led and found himself facing Sirius’ face, which was unnaturally close. He could feel the hot breath on his face and found himself closing his eyes against his will.

“Hey, hey, Rems,” Sirius started, eyes still closed but a wild smile on his face. “You know how ol’ Snivellus started talking about something at his place?” He giggled a bit. “Maybe he wears ladies knickers and he - he stole some from Minerva!” He broke into more laughter.

Remus had thought about it hundreds of times when he could spare the thought. Snape had something at his house, he knew, and it was important to Minerva. Was it important to Dumbledore, too, then? Would he have still killed the Headmaster if it were? What could it be?

“Sirius, do you remember seeing anything strange at his house?”

Sirius shrugged. “Peter was there, yes he was.” He giggles once more and tried to speak through the gales of laughter. “Maybe - maybe they both wear -”

Remus snorted just to keep Sirius from talking more about knickers. “What did you do with him?”

“I made him go sleep,” Sirius answered, brow furrowing with his eyes still closed. “And he didn’t wake.”

“You killed him?” Remus yelped, eyes widening as he shot up into a sitting position.

Sirius shook his head. “Nope. No killing Peter. I made him go sleep for a little while.”

Remus let out a breath of relief and fell back into the soft pillows. “Good, Sirius. Good.”

Smiling, Sirius told him, “Nothing else different. Snivellus has bad taste, though, I can say that. House was… dark and ugly. Like my parents’ house.”

Not remembering what the house looked like that Sirius had spent his childhood in, Remus could not answer. He remained silent, listening to Sirius go on about snakes and the color green until his words slurred beyond recognition and he fell asleep.