By Way of Reign Falls

"Watching you, watching me, one lonely star
I've always been in love with you
I guess you've always known it's true
You took my love for granted, why oh why
The show is over, say good-bye "

- Madonna "Take A Bow"

I always told myself that I would never depend on anyone. That I could survive on my own and I would prove it to the world, childhood dreams of my Prince Charming aside. Unlike the other girls my age, my knight in shining armor would not save me as a damsel in distress, but complete me in a way that nothing else could. My Prince Absolute. Rather deep thoughts for a preteen, right? My mum thought so too; she asked me where I'd heard it.

But she misunderstood me as it was. She thought I meant I'd never fall in love. She said I'd find some guy one day who'd make me change my mind.

Not bloody likely.

You see, I didn't mean I wouldn't find someone to spend my life with. I didn't mean I had no desire to fall in love and have a family and live a fairytale life. I would find my Prince Charming. I just didn't mean that if my Cinderella dress snagged a hole, I couldn't find the means to sew it up myself. I'm a realist; I dream and I hope for the best, but I try not to disillusion myself from reality. I know that not everyone has a happy ending and I know that happy endings don't always last. I just refuse to wither up and die if it happens to me.

Anyway. I promised it to myself. I was still promising myself this the day I meant him. Him. A skinny little boy with shaggy black hair and clothes ten sizes too big. And a scar. Not much for the savior of the wizarding world, is it? But I thought he was wonderful. He became my world, my love at the tender age of eleven. In my mind, he was my Prince Charming.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

"You alright, Gin?" Harry pulled a chair over to where she was sitting by the window. Ginny turned her head and smiled softly as she looked up.

"Yeah. Just couldn't sleep is all."

"I know what you mean." Ginny couldn't hide her sad smile. Harry looked out the window a moment before continuing. "You know, the stars are unusually bright tonight."

There was a brief silence, during which she took the opportunity to see the night's sky for herself. "Bright and beautiful, yes, but they still manage to be depressing."

She could practically see his frown in her mind. "How so?"

"They make me feel so small... like it doesn't even matter that I'm alive. Time will pass and I'll be gone, but the night and her stars will be ever present." Her voice trailed off before she whispered, "Always will they look down on those that love and have love in return."

Harry turned to Ginny and took her hand in his. Slowly, carefully, he said, "Gin, you're surrounded by friends and family everywhere you go. You have all the love you could possibly need."

Allowing herself time to take in his comment, the window's view once again claimed her gaze. It was with a noticeable reluctance and slightly cross tone that she continued, "You're not dense Harry, so don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about." She studied him quizzically. "Honestly, Harry. You know how I feel about you; we both know you're aware. I'm not going to jump you when you're not looking." She tried not to be offended when he dropped her hand as if it burned.

"I... I know that. I just... I just don't want to make you awkward is all."

She very nearly snorted in annoyance before remembering it everyone was asleep, so instead opted to roll her eyes. "Try four years ago, Harry. I'm not twelve years old anymore."

His avoidance of eye contact was the only thing giving away his nervousness. "I'm very well aware of that. If it weren't for Ron..."

She dropped her head into her hands, cutting him off with a fierce whisper. "And if it weren't for Ron? What then?" He hesitated before answering.

"Ginny, he's my best friend." She had no reply to that. It wasn't worth one. She almost turned away when she felt Harry's hand brush against her cheek. "You'll find someone worth you, Gin. Don't ever doubt that." With that he returned the chair to where he'd found it and went up the stairs that Ginny now wished he'd never come down.

Ginny ignored the fact that she'd never doubted at all to this point that she'd find someone worth her. She ignored that that person was always Harry. But most of, she ignored that she never thought he'd hurt her like he just had. Because now, she doubted she'd find someone worth her. She doubted that that person was Harry. And she doubted that she'd ever let him hurt her like that again.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

I thought he was everything for so long. So long. I never realized when it became a habit. I never realized when he was changing me. Funny how your standards change without your noticing it, isn't it?

But he was. Changing me, I mean. Suddenly I was making a fool of myself to get him to just notice me. I'd completely forgotten my promise to myself; forgotten that I'd made it, forgotten that it existed. My days were good or bad depending on whether or not he'd just looked at me.

It was completely horrible when I realized this. Absolutely horrible. It was like believing yourself to be the most loved woman in the world, then waking up to realize it was all a dream and nobody cared. Like thinking I knew myself inside and out, only to come to the realization that I had absolutely no idea. It was admitting that I had a flaw. He had become the Prince Charming that I had always said I didn't want, and all while I had turned a blind eye to the fact.

He was everything that I didn't want. He was completely wrong for me. Unfortunately, I didn't realize this until the only way to back away was to hurt him.

Because there was someone else to make me see.

The last person anyone would have expected.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

"Weasley, would you kindly move these things you deign to call possessions. You're taking up the entire table."

Without looking up and not even lifting her pen from the paper , Ginny replied without missing a beat. "First off, Malfoy, I do not "deign" to call them anything; they're library books. Secondly, there is not another soul in this section of the library to take up the other tables. Use one of them."

"This is the closest to the books I need. I refuse to walk further than I have to with a load of books to carry." His haughty tone effectively covered up any embarrassment he might have felt over her cool brush-off, but Ginny doubted that he felt anything other than superiority.

Even this subtle suggestion that he was better than her, one which would have set off any, if not all, of the other Weasleys failed to bait her. She continued to read from the text before her, every few seconds jotting down notes onto her parchment. "Then perhaps you should get another table. My books are already filling this one; yours wouldn't fit if you need more room then there already is."

"Which is why you should move them." She didn't have to look up to know he was smirking.

"Piss off, Malfoy."

"Afraid not."

Without a word, Ginny put down her quill. With ink-stained hands and a tired sigh, she rubbed her eyes and for the first time looked up at the person standing before her. Her voice was quiet, but firm. "For once in your life Draco, act the age that you are and let me be. I have work to do and I don't have time for your bullshit."

His head cock to the side as he looked at her. "Alright then."

She blinked and leaned forward a bit so that she might hear him better. "Excuse me?"

"Alright then."

"No insult? No corny comeback about how I don't have the money for your bullshit either?"

His gaze met hers and she held it. For a split second she saw his shield fall and wondered at the humanity she saw behind it. "Things change, Weasley."

Ginny Weasley was never one for clichés; most people in her situation would claim later that they had no idea what prompted them to do what she did next. Ginny, however, knew exactly what she was doing. With a slight nod, she collected her books and sat them on the chair next to her.

"Why so they do."

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

"Where you going, Gin?"

Ginny paused on her way through the common room, turning around to see Ron looking sheepishly down at her from the landing on the stairs. His ears were slightly pink and his shoulders tense, most likely due to the way his hands were jammed into his trouser pockets. She couldn't help but smile at the sight.

"Nowhere really, just the library."

"Oh."

She waited a few moments for him to say something else, but when he didn't continue she laughed at his randomness and turned to leave again. "I'll talk to you later Ron. In the meantime, do try to remember what you were going to ---"

"Hermione told me she saw you studying with Malfoy a few days ago." Ron had cut her off quickly, as if rushing to get the words out of his mouth.

"-- say," she mumbled, then sighed. "Well then. Hermione certainly has a big mouth then, doesn't she."

Ron frowned, his eyebrows drawing closer together, and ignored her last comment altogether. "So she wasn't imagining things? Harry told her that she needed to lie down for a few minutes, that she was clearly hallucinating."

Ginny's eyes narrowed. "Harry doesn't know me, he missed his chance at that. As for Hermione, no she wasn't imagining things. Draco has been my study partner since the beginning of the term."

"Draco, Gin? And since the beginning of the term? How? He's a bastard!"

She grinned slightly. "Yeah he is, isn't he."

Ron rolled his eyes, coming to stand in front of her. "Oh for Pete's sake." He looked away for a minute before meeting her eyes. "Ginny, he's dangerous. You know that."

Her eyes narrowed again. "He can't help what his father is, Ron."

He shook his head. "And I'm not talking about his father. I'm talking about him. You have no idea what he's capable of, Gin."

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "And you do?"

Ron's ears turned even pinker, ever-so-slightly. "Well, you know who his father." He made a face. "Is."

The sarcastic undertone in her laugh was clearly audible. "We're not talking about his father. We're talking about Draco, remember?"

"He's a bloody arsehole, Ginny. That should be enough." His softened tone cut through the layers of defense she had set up, right through all the sarcasm and annoyance. It made her soften her tone as well, willing him to understand.

"It's different with me than it is with you, Ron. Just trust me, alright?"

Ron looked down at his shoes for so long Ginny thought he'd gone into a trance, which she would have no trouble believing. She assumed that he had no idea what she meant before, when she said that it was different for her. It was though... Ginny Weasley and Draco Malfoy had come to an odd sort of truce. Though their manner was slightly less gruff, neither treated the other any different than before and yet at the same time neither took offense. She knew Ron would never understand this; Malfoy had been awful to him his entire stint at Hogwarts. He would never be able to understand how it was any different than before.

"Do I have to?" he asked quietly, suddenly. At Ginny's blank look, which obviously said she'd forgotten what the question was, he continued. "Trust you. Do I have to trust you?"

"I'd greatly appreciate it."

"Alright then. I'll trust you, Gin." As he gave her a hug, he whispered in her ear, "But I swear on Merlin's beard that if he hurts you in any way, and I mean any, he won't live long enough to feel sorry." And before she could explain it wasn't like that, he had turned and gone back up the stairs. His ears were pinker now than they'd been when he came down.

Shaking her head and smiling indulgently to herself, Ginny turned only to find her path to the portrait hole was blocked by none other than Harry Potter. And if Ginny hadn't already known Harry and her brother had been friends for years, she would have guessed it now. His stance mirrored Ron's from the stairs just a few minutes ago.

"Yes Harry?" Exasperated, but finding no reason to be outwardly angry with him, she smiled politely and waited for his response.

He smiled sheepishly, looking like someone who was extremely unsure about himself. "Malfoy, eh?"

Ginny rolled her eyes, her exasperation visible now, and made to brush past him. "Yes, Harry, Malfoy. Spare me the lecture." She stopped when he reached out to grab her arm.

"Wait-- Ginny. That wasn't what I wanted to ask you."

She raised an eyebrow.

"I, well... I was wondering if... you'd like to go to the Yule Ball with me." Ginny froze. "As my date, I mean. If you don't already have one." He laughed nervously to himself.

"No. No I don't have a date," she muttered, mind running frantically, not quite aware of what she was saying.

Harry visibly brightened. "So you'll go with me?"

Running a hand through her hair, Ginny stared up at him. What was going on here? "I... don't know, Harry. Let me think about it, okay?" She needed to think.

"Uh... sure." His tone was laced with confusion. "Think all you want. I'll see you later then." As he walked away, all Ginny could think about was his tone, how she knew he assumed she would automatically say yes. And how angry that made her.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

Now, don't get me wrong. My ex-Prince Charming had helped me see as well. Crystal-clearly, in fact. I also helped myself. But it was this new factor, the one who would in time become my Prince Absolute, my love, that pushed me through the curtains. The one who made me stand in front of the world and belt out the song that was in my heart, the one that made me want to.

But not yet. For now, he was simply... enlightening.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

Ginny flopped into her chair, took a deep breath and opened the first book she got her hands on, starting on her notes right away. Her frantic writing, however, did nothing more than tear a hole in the parchment she was writing on. With a slight growl she crumpled it up and tossed it at Draco's head, and without a word she started on another sheet of parchment.

Three.

Two.

One.

"Trouble in paradise, Weasley?" came the sarcastic drawl; right on schedule, as always. In her mind's eye she saw Draco's perfectly arched eyebrow raised, curiosity and annoyance etched onto his face.

"No," she ground out. "Why would you think that?"

"I don't know. It could have been the fact that you dared to throw a piece of parchment at something owned by Draco Malfoy, let alone his person, unprovoked. Or maybe that you just growled at said parchment." The trademark Malfoy smirk was in place.

Only to be countered with the Weasley Death-Glare. "Save it Draco. And visit a shrink while you're at it. You're referring to yourself in third-person."

Draco said nothing, choosing merely to watch her. Ginny, for her part, continued to scribble furiously about the mechanics behind the 'reducto' charm. She knew perfectly well that he was staring at her, but she chose to ignore it.

And ignore it some more.

He was causing the back of her neck to itch. She scratched it.

Why wouldn't he.

Look.

Away. Damnit.

"What?!" she finally snapped. "Why are you looking at me?!"

Draco raised his perfectly shaped eyebrow once more. "Simply waiting for you to share what it is that's gotten a pole shoved up your arse. I'm dying to know what has you this worked up; for personal reference, you know."

Ginny banged her head lightly on the table. She mumbled, "You don't want to know."

"Au contraire. What is it? Has Potter not asked you to the ball yet?"

"Actually, he has."

"Then what's the problem."

"I don't want to go with him."

Draco opened his mouth to retort, but stopped upon his discovery that she had not answered as he thought she would. He tried again, interest coloring his voice. "Oh?"

"Yeah."

"And why not?"

Ginny smirked. "I want to go with someone else."

Draco rolled his eyes, his tone bordering on sarcasm and scorn in one fell swoop. "And who could possibly be better than the Savior of the Wizarding World?

"Someone who understands me."

"Yeah, well, I've heard that flying solo is the latest thing." Closing the book in front of him, he continued, "Sorry to break it to you Weasley, but fat chance you'll find someone."

"Yeah. Fat chance."

After packing up his things, Draco turned to leave. He was fifteen feet away when he hesitated. "You know... " he started, turning his head slightly to the side, " You could have been a Slytherin." Without another word, he walked away.

Ginny stared at the space he'd previously occupied for ages, leaving the library a short while later. She made no progress on her charms homework that night.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

Ginny woke with a start. Looking around to find what had been the cause, she found Harry standing over her. She blinked, confused and not yet fully awake. "Harry?" Yawn. "What are you doing in my dorm?"

An eyebrow was raised and an amused grin was formed. "You're in the common room, Gin. You fell asleep doing your charms homework."

Blink. "Oh." She yawned again for good measure, taking a moment to stretch out her arms. "Well... what are you doing down here this late anyway?"

Harry shrugged. "I couldn't sleep, so I was going to come down here to think."

Ginny nodded. "Always a good idea. What were you going to think about?"

"The Yule Ball," was the straightforward reply.

She sighed, her head tilting to the side slightly as she considered him. Getting to her feet, she smiled softly at Harry and gave him half a hug, before turning to go. She got as far as the stairs before his voice stopped her.

"What are you thinking?"

She chewed lightly on her bottom lip, one foot on the stairs. It was a moment before she answered, her words soft, yet clearly heard by him standing across the room. "I'm thinking... whether I should accept the offer of a friend who needs a non-committed date or wait for the person I really want to ask me."

Harry laughed weakly. "But I already asked you."

Ginny didn't answer, meeting his gaze without a trace of rancor.

He tried again. "I didn't ask you as a friend Ginny..."

She shook her head. "But you did ask me to get over you. And I did. I don't think I can give you the answer you're looking for."

She continued on her way up the stairs, not even pausing when she heard a whispered "It's Draco..." follow in her wake. She closed the dormitory door lightly, but firmly, behind her, careful not to wake her roommates.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

Enlightening is not the word my Housemates would have chose. Brain-washing is more like it. They weren't very... understanding of my situation.

Understatement.

All the other girls, with their 'damsel-saving Prince Charming', never understood; they all saw my Prince Absolute as the enemy. For lack of a better comparison in the story, he was the evil-stepmother whose role was to by all costs keep us apart. 'She's so lucky,' they would say, 'Why is she ruining this for herself?' He was their Prince Charming, so why didn't I think so?

Trouble is, I did think so. At one time.

But now I knew better.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

"As fascinating as it must be Weasley, staring at your parchment isn't going to make your assignment suddenly appear."

Ginny blinked, shaking her head as if in a daze. "Huh?"

Draco snorted. "Very eloquent. I suppose you'll be the next Shakespeare the way you're going." When she continued to just stare blankly at him, he sighed, resigned. "You know, it's lucky that monstrosity your family calls hair looks semi-decent on you, because you aren't apt to get anywhere in life using your brains."

"Stuff it Draco." Said person raised an eyebrow. She was never this half-assed in her comebacks. Usually it was at least a 'bugger off'.

"Might I ask what's got your panties in a twist?"

"No."

"Might I enquire as to the person who stuck a pole up your arse?"

"No."

"Bee in your bonnet?"

"Draco!" She slammed her quill down on the table, glaring at him. "Bugger off!"

He smiled smugly. That's the ticket. "Honestly, Weasley. No reason to go off the deep end. I was simply being a concerned citizen, wondering at a Gryffindor's well-being." The humor in his voice was hardly noticeable.

Ginny narrowed her eyes at him. "There's nothing you can do to help me, okay? So just forget about it."

"Try me, Weasley."

Her laugh was grim as she gathered up her things. "No one from my beloved House understands where I'm coming from. I mean, honestly," she said sarcastically, "Why in the world wouldn't I be jumping all over Harry now that he likes me?"

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Why would you?"

Ginny met his eyes with gratitude. Before she could answer however, she heard someone hissing her name somewhere off to the left. Turning back to Draco, slightly hurried, she ran a hand through her hair. "Look Draco, would you -- ." She was cut off by her name being hissed again, much closer this time.

"Go to the ball with you?" he finished for her. At her nod he continued, "Only if you'll go with me."

Ginny smiled, her first real one in his presence. "I'd love to." Draco looked... well, not quite pleased, but at least satisfied with her answer, his face more open than his usual holier-than-thou pretense. The shift in his eyes, however, told her that someone was standing behind her.

"Ginny?" She closed her eyes for a moment, before turning towards the last person she wanted to see right now. "Yes Harry?" One look at his face told her he had heard Draco's question. And her answer.

He look very uncomfortable. "Uh... Ron sent me. He wanted you to come to quidditch practice for a bit; wondered if you could show the chasers the moved you two worked on this summer." Ginny just noticed he was in his quidditch gear.

Smiling slightly, she nodded. "I'll be down in a bit."

"Oh... okay." After he left, Ginny turned back to Draco. He was looking mildly amused and expectant at the same time.

Shouldering her bag, she told Draco they'd make plans later and left it at that. She smiled smugly to herself when she felt his eyes follow her exit.

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

He was doing it again. Staring at her, as if she didn't notice. Everyday for the past week it's all he had been doing. Just staring at her.

Ginny couldn't take it any more. "What do you want, Harry?" she not-quite-snapped, looking up from her potions notes.

There were immediate results. Harry jumped, looking quite embarrassed at having been caught, face turning several shades of red. Ron and Hermione both looked up from their own homework assignments, curious. "Um... nothing?"

Eyebrows raised, an amused Malfoy-ish smirk on her face, she returned to her notes. "Good."

This happened three more times before Ginny got fed up. Gathering her books and parchment in her tote, she gave terse goodbyes and headed to the library. She was stopped by Hermione just outside the portrait hole.

"Ginny, what's your problem?" She wasn't quite annoyed, but was obviously getting there. Ginny, however, was slightly confused.

"Come again?"

She crossed her arms tightly across her chest. "What's your problem? You just crucified Harry back there!"

Ginny frowned. "Hermione, he was staring at me incessantly. In fact, he has been all week. I was bound to snap sometime; it's bloody annoying!"

"Well, I'm sure you stared at him when you fancied him!"

Ginny stared at her in disbelief. "Sure I did my own bloody staring, but at least I did it from corners where he couldn't see me."

Hermione narrowed her eyes slightly. "You could at least have a little compassion. You of all people know what it's like to fancy someone who doesn't fancy you back."

"Hermione, I am trying you know. I would never harm him purposefully; he has enough shit to deal with in his life without me making it harder on him."

"Well, you're not doing a very good job of it!"

Ginny's eyebrow raised even further, taking a moment to replay in her head what had just been said to her. "He told me to get over him, Hermione. So I did. I bloody did. And now he wants to take it back?" She made a face. "'Oops, sorry, I made a mistake. Do you think you could turn on the 'Fancy Harry' switch again?'

"Sorry, Hermione," she deadpanned, the Malfoy-ish smirk back. "He was asking for this and yet I'm still trying to be as nice as I can. So don't talk to me about compassion."

Hermione's hand had flown to her mouth. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she whispered, "He's changed you, Ginny, Malfoy has."

Ginny shook her head, turning away. "No. Harry changed me."

-- _ ~ * ~ _ --

Allowing her hand to trail lightly on the railing, Ginny descended the stairs just outside the Great Hall. A graceful entrance, her mother had always told her, ensured the undivided attention of every male in the room. She was seeking that of only one. The very one whose heavy gaze had rested on her the moment she appeared.

Maintaining eye contact for the length of her descent, Ginny stopped before him and smiled lightly at the Slytherin in front of her. "Draco."

"Weasley," he replied, bowing slightly and offering his arm as soon as he was upright. She took it, laying her delicately gloved hand upon it.

"I must say, Weasley," he commented, voice completely droll, as they began to walk into the hall, "your robes look very good on you. The green brings out the color in your eyes and the cut highly accentuates your arse."

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "I am simply torn between pleasure and indignity."

Smirk. "Get used to it." Again, the same conflict raged within her. In the end, pleasure won out; he had implied that this relationship, of sorts, would continue beyond the ball. She indulged herself with a self-satisfied smile.

Looking around the Great Hall, she saw that the Hogwarts elves had simply outdone themselves once again. She expected no less. Glancing around the room to admire the dress robes of her fellow classmates, a flash of brilliant green made her pause for a moment in her inspection. They were eyes. Brilliant green eyes.

Watching her.

It's with a bitter pang of regret that the look I see so clearly in his eyes was one that was reflected in my own so many times. He wants me. And now...

Now he can't have me.

~ * finis * ~