Song for Hermione

CHAPTER ONE - PARTINGS AND PAIN

"Nero Aquous!" A jet of water sprinkled from the 9 ½ inch Cedar wand of Morag MacDougal, a fifth year Slytherin. There was a hissing sound, meaning that the spell had taken effect. The liquid had put out the small fire from a burning piece of parchment on the bedside table of his dorm mate, Draco Malfoy.

"What the hell were you doing, Draco?" Morag asked as the parchment curled up into ashes, ruining the surface of the small table. Draco, however, seemed not to care. He just shrugged uncertainly, still holding his wand. Apparently that wasn't the first time he had burned a piece of parchment that day, having twice used the "Incendio" spell.

"Hey, Malfoy," Morag waved his hand in front of the blonde. "Are you alright?" No answer. "I'd better call Pansy. Stay here."

As Morag closed the dormitory door, Draco seemed to snap out of his shallow reverie. He stood up from bed, then headed for the direction of the bathroom. Stopping right at the entrance, he furiously punched the wooden door leading to it.

"Aargh!" Yelling angrily, he hit it again using his other hand. He continued on this for some time, ignoring the pain and blood oozing from his fists. His hands wouldn't be recognizable had Pansy not arrived.

"Draco!" she cried, running towards him. "Draco, stop it! Stop it!" she tried to pull him away, gripping him by the waist, but it was all in vain. She only managed to fall backward onto the floor as her hands slipped, losing grip from Draco.

"Ow!" Pansy's rear hit the floor. This was rather fortunate, as this meant that she was in no immediate danger, and distracted Draco as well. Finally turning his back on the door, he helped her up, dirtying her hands with his blood.

"Stop this, Draco," she said, tightly grasping his hands to prevent him from attacking the door again. "Please, don't do this to yourself."

Wrenching free from Pansy's grasp, Draco fell on his knees. He ran one formerly pale hand through his hair, staining it with blood. Then he roared, making Pansy jump.

"I HATE THIS FUCKING LIFE! I HATE THIS FUCKING LIFE!" he now pulling his hair in anger, with both bloody hands.

"Pansy," he said, more quietly, but quite shakily, "I can't take this anymore." Tears were welling up in his gray eyes. "I - CAN'T - STAND - THIS - ANY - LONGER!" he banged the dorm floor with a fist.

"What happened?" she inquired. "Wait - you didn't - "

"I did," he said thickly. "I wrote to her, second time today, actually. But - but I keep on chickening out. I - always remembered that I shouldn't. I SHOULDN'T!

"I'm a Malfoy," he continued. "That's what made me burn them both. That's what's making me so God damn miserable right now!" he pulled his silvery blonde hair again. "I can't love her. I can't acknowledge her in public. I - I can't . . . God I'm so cowardly . . ." he broke off, tears now flowing freely in his cheeks. Pansy, pitying him more than ever, kneeled on the floor in front of him.

"And I thought having a good cry would do you good, " she said softly, her eyes glassy. "Stop doing this, Draco. You're not - " but Draco cut her off.

"I can never have her. She can never be mine." But why not? he thought miserably. " And to think I accepted the fact that she was a Mud - a Mud - "

"A muggle-born," Pansy finished the sentence for him. "See? She made you forget that you're different. You accepted her for what she was. That's love, Draco."

"Not really," he said. "Anyway, that's nice of you to say that." He seemed to try and change the subject, but secretly grateful for what she said. "Especially since you're a Slytherin."

"The point is," she said, sensing his attempt to talk of something else. "When it comes to love, anything is possible. Anything. Don't worry, things will work out between you and - her. Lovers mostly end up happy together, you know.

"Now," she now stood up, wiping her eyes and hands. "Let's go up to dinner. It's getting late. But first - " she took out her wand, then knelt down again.

"Sano," she muttered, pointing it to his wounded hands. As the blood vanished instantly she now cleaned Draco's hair with her wand. She then stood up and headed for the door.

"Pansy," Draco called as she touched the doorknob. He was now standing, brushing dust off his robes with fully healed hands.

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

Pansy smiled.

* * * * * * * * * *

On the upper part of the castle, inside Gryffindor Tower, several students were still awake. Among them was fifth year Hermione Granger. As usual, she was to be found in a study table in one part of the common room. But unlike what everyone's used to, she was not studying. Yes, she may be holding a book, looking as though she was reading it. But she is not. She's thinking of something else.

Oh, God, why can't things turn out nicely for us? she thought. Why can't we be together and be proud of it? She began to cry. Why?

"Hermione?" came a voice beside her. It was her boyfriend, Harry Potter. He had approached without her noticing.

"Why are you crying?" he asked, taking out a handkerchief. Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, Hermione stood up, trying to get away from Harry.

"No, it's - it's nothing, Harry," she said uncertainly, avoiding his eyes and collecting her things as fast as she could.

"There you go again," he said, louder than he meant to. He was starting to get angry now, and their fellow Gryffindors were starting to stare at them. "You always keep things from me. Why? Am I not intelligent enough to hear your problems?" he grabbed Hermione's arm, as she was trying to walk away from him. "What? Tell me?"

Hermione didn't answer. Instead, tears welled up in her eyes again as she struggled from Harry's grip.

"Fine," he said, in a less loud tone, though his face was starting to turn red. "Just tell me when you're ready. That's when I'll talk to you again as well." And he stomped out of the room through the portrait hole where he bumped into Ron, who looked confused as he saw Harry's face.

The whole of the common room (except for Hermione, that is) resumed their businesses after Harry had left. Apparently the scene they had witnessed earlier was only one of the many that had occurred inside the Potter-Granger relationship. Ron, however, approached his friend.

"You okay, Mione?" he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. She cried harder than ever, though she kept it quiet so as not to bother anyone again.

"He - he - " she couldn't bring her heart to say it. Ron immediately but gently put his arms around her, patting her on the back.

"It's okay," he said comfortingly. After letting her tears flow for some time, he said, "Come on. Let's go down to dinner. I'll take care of your things later." He added, handing her a handkerchief.

After wiping her tears and pocketing Ron's handkerchief, Hermione went down to dinner with her redheaded companion, though still thinking about something else besides the argument she'd been in earlier.

When they got inside the Great Hall, the house tables were still full of food, but not much students were there anymore. Seeing Harry, Ron took a seat beside him, Hermione on his other side. A few minutes later, Ron was eating heartily, Harry throwing glances at his girlfriend, but Hermione wasn't eating. She just sat there with glassy eyes, staring at her empty plate.

Two tables away (or at the other side of the hall), Draco Malfoy was absentmindedly twirling his fork in his plate, having lost thread in eating. Pansy couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Losing her appetite, she just sat there as well, looking worryingly at him.

"Hey," Ron said, snapping his fingers in front of Hermione. "You okay?" she just looked up and smiled weakly, but didn't say anything. Then she looked away.

"I'm fine, Pansy," Draco said, feeling a bit annoyed. Looking away, he casted a glance at the other house tables.

And then it happened. Draco's eyes met Hermione's. Both of them seemed frozen with shock at this, coz they surely weren't expecting it. Despite having no reaction besides shock, neither of them looked away. They just sat there, their eyes seeming to converse with each other.

I miss you, Hermione thought. I never thought it would happen, but it did. Do you feel the same way? She was now on the verge of tears, but managed to stare at him longingly.

I admit it, Draco said in his head, looking pitiful as a lost puppy. You were quite something. You made me forget that you were a Mud - no, muggle-born. You reformed me. I don't know how you did it, but somehow - you changed me.

A seat away, Harry was nudging Ron in the ribs, gesturing him to switch places with Harry.

"C'mon, move."

"Yeah, yeah. But make sure you cheer her up, okay?"

"Of course, Ron. I'm about to apologize, remember?"

I'm not sure if you're missing me like I'm missing you, Draco. But do you feel anything for me at all? I love you. Do you hate me like I've known you before? Please say no.

Everything about me keeps me away from you. I couldn't give it up that easily. At least not now. But I promise you, I will . . . someday. I would do anything for you. Can you hear me? I love you.

The last thought that drifted inside Draco's mind seemed to have reached Hermione's. Tears were now falling down her face, unable to take it any longer.

I - I wish there was something I could do. Is there any way that we can be free? God, I'm so helpless . . .

"Hermione?" Harry said in an undertone. He noticed her crying just as soon as he had taken his place at Ron's seat. "What's wrong?" he asked, looking at her. He frantically looked around, searching for the supposed git making her shed tears. She seems to be staring at something - or someone. But who?

And then he saw it. Draco Malfoy, his archenemy in almost everything, was staring at his girlfriend as she was looking at him.

What the - Malfoy? He saw the look on Draco's face, too pitiful even for him to resist.

Hermione sniffed, then finally looked away. But to her horror, she saw Harry glaring at Draco. Luckily, the blonde did not see it. He now started to eat after she had broken eye contact. Unfortunately, Harry did not look happy at all. He could have growled then ripped Malfoy apart with the look in his blazing green eyes.

"H - Harry," Hermione began, sounding almost terrified.

"Follow me," was all he could say. He stood up, then walked out of the Great Hall. After assuring Ron that everything was okay, Hermione followed. She caught up with Harry as he walked inside an empty classroom.

"Harry," she said again. She didn't know what to say. Nor apparently, did Harry. He didn't say anything. His back was to her, the now blank look on his face unseen. After a few tense moments of silence, he finally spoke.

"You and - and him," he said. "I wouldn't have believed it."

"Harry," Hermione whimpered. She was crying, for the third time that evening. Harry turned around to face her.

"Of all people," he said, in an unusually soft tone, "you had to pick him."

"I -I never wanted it to happen," she said, her eyes brimming with more tears.

"I know," said Harry, surprising her. He approached, then handed her a handkerchief. "Stop crying, Hermione. I understand."

"Y - you do?" she said, more dumbstruck than ever. "But - but - "

"You can never tell your heart whom you should love," he said. "In this case, your hearts beats for Mal - er - Draco. It just didn't call for me, that's all," he added, trying not to sound hurt. "Don't worry, Hermione, I can handle this more than you think. I'm a Hogwarts hero, am I not?"

Hermione smiled weakly. Then she cried again, falling into Harry's arms.

"I'm sorry, Harry.," she said thickly. "I'm really sorry. I know I shouldn't hurt you, you've been through enough already. It's just that - "

"It's okay," said Harry, patting her on the back, cherishing the embrace he was giving her (which may well be the last). "I'm okay."

"Oh, Harry - " she hugged him harder, extremely grateful that he understood. "Thank you."

"Now it makes sense," he said.

"Huh?"

"Remember the time we were in the library?"

"Um, yes."

"You muttered his name while you were kissing me."

"Oh. I did?"

"Yes indeed."

"I'm sorry, Harry."

"That's alright. Come on, it's late. Ron's probably starting to worry by now."

"Thank you so much."

"Don't mention it. Besides, what are friends for?"

She hugged him again.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Again we concentrate on the lower part of the castle, this time by the Slytherin girls' dormitory. Inside were four fifth years having a conversation (or as we ladies call it, "girl talk"). Among them was Pansy Parkinson, who was still worried about Draco ever since she saw him attacking the bathroom door in his dormitory.

"Hey," Blaise Zabini snapped her fingers in front of her. "You okay, Pansy?"

"Huh?" she seemed to come back to her senses. "Oh - it' nothing."

"I know," said Sally-Anne Perks, her bright blue eyes flashing. "You're thinking of Draco Malfoy, aren't you?"

Blaise giggled.

"She must be," Millicent Bulstrode piped up. "Who wouldn't think about that *sigh* gorgeous hunk?" she too, suppressed a giggle, the dreamy look obvious on her face.

"You're lucky, you know," Sally said to Pansy. "He's all yours, isn't he? I mean, both you parents have already engaged you." Pansy shook her head, taking the other three by surprise.

"You mean - you're not - I mean you and Draco are not - " Millicent stuttered. Pansy shook her head again.

"But what about - " Blaise lowered her voice, "Sir Lucius' arrangements?"

"I don't know," said Pansy, shrugging. "Guess Draco's on his own."

"Hmmm . . ." Millicent just had an idea. As expected of Slytherins, she smirked menacingly, much to the ignorance of her dorm mates. A plan was going on at the back of her mind.

- - END OF CHAPTER ONE --