Remember To Breathe

The Gryffindor common room was already full by the time that Oliver arrived. He'd heard the news about Ginny Weasley in the halls from another group of sixth years. They'd been lamenting the inevitable closing of Hogwarts, but as soon as Oliver had heard Ginny's name and that the monster had taken and most likely killed her, his thoughts went immediately to Percy. Hogwarts could have fallen to a pile of rubble in that moment and Oliver wouldn't have cared; his only concern was for Percy Weasley.

He'd returned to Gryffindor Tower and scanned the crowded common room, strangely quiet for the number of students currently occupying it. The day's events seemed to have subdued the entire student population.

Oliver spotted Ron and Harry sitting in one corner with Fred and George, but Percy was notably absent from the group. That wasn't really surprising; Percy had never been much for sharing his feelings, even with his family. Only Oliver seemed to be capable of pushing past his carefully constructed walls and, at times, even that could be an effort.

Oliver knew that Percy would go off by himself rather than share his pain with Ron and the twins. He also knew that Percy did not need to be alone. He was far too introspective for his own good sometimes and this was too much to handle on his own, even for the great prefect himself.

Having a pretty good idea about where Percy might be, Oliver slipped out of the common room towards the hallway that held the prefect's private dorm rooms. He approached Percy's door and gave a soft knock, but got no reply. Raising his wand, he softly spoke the password for the door, which Percy had only shared with Oliver, and the door swung slowly inward.

Oliver stepped inside and pushed the door closed behind him, all the while already scanning the small room for his friend. The bed and desk were empty, but a quiet sniffling sound from the corner by the wardrobe instantly drew Oliver's attention.

"Perce?" he called softly as he made his way around the bed and towards the sound. His only answer was more muffled sniffling as he reached the corner and found who he'd been looking for.

There, propped against the wall with his knees drawn up towards his body, his arms wrapped around his legs and his face pressed into his knees, was Percy Weasley. The second that he saw him there, crouched down miserably in a corner, looking so young and scared and helpless, Oliver's heart broke.

He sank to the floor beside Percy and wrapped his arms around his friend's shaking body, hanging on until Percy finally submitted and fell forward to cling to Oliver in return. He buried his face against Oliver's chest, his hands balled up in the school robes that Oliver still wore, and any last bits of control that Percy was holding onto crumbled. Oliver heard him release a sharp, anguished cry, and then his body shook violently as he began to sob.

"Shh, it's okay," Oliver whispered into his hair as he ran soothing hands over the other boy's back. "I'm here, Perce, I'm here. Just let it out. I've got you."

After what seemed like an eternity had passed, Percy's shaking finally began to ease, his tears slowing. Oliver was starting to think that he'd cried himself to sleep, but then he heard words mumbled against his chest and knew that Percy was indeed still awake.

"What was that?" he asked quietly, the tone in the room seeming to demand no voice above a mere whisper.

Percy lifted his head a bit, still not moving from the strong arms that held him close and repeated, "It should have been me." The words alone were enough to bring tears to prick at Oliver's eyes.

Reaching down to cup Percy's face, filled with such sorrow and despair that Oliver's breath caught in his throat for a moment, he ran his thumb along one sculpted cheekbone and whispered back, "No, love, please don't say that. It shouldn't have been. Not you, not her . . . no one."

"But . . ." Percy's voice cracked, his face contorting as he surely thought of his little sister and her dreaded fate. "I'm supposed to look out for her, Oli. I'm supposed to be the one to protect her . . . to protect all of them. And now I've let them all down."

Oliver drew in a breath, still cradling Percy's head in his hands, and replied, "This isn't your fault, Percy. There's nothing you could have done to stop this. Even Dumbledore couldn't stop it . . . Please don't blame yourself."

Percy didn't respond, just turned his head to press his cheek to Oliver's palm and silence enveloped them once again. It was several long minutes later, as Oliver ran his free hand through Percy's mass of red curls, that the silence was finally broken.

"I love you," Percy whispered almost inaudibly.

"Wh-what?" Oliver had to ask.

Percy lifted his head then and turned back to face Oliver as he repeated, "I said, I love you."

"Yeah, I love you, too, Perce. You're my best mate, of course I love you." It was extremely odd to hear such words from Percy; he was always so guarded in his emotions and now he seemed so raw, so vulnerable. But Oliver tried not to read too much into it; Percy had lost his little sister and couldn't be thinking very clearly at the moment.

But, the next thing he knew, Oliver was forced to stop contemplating his best friend's state of mind as he found himself pushed back to the floor, Percy lying on top of him and pressing his lips to Oliver's. A combination of shock and want had Oliver kissing back momentarily, but soon enough he pulled away, gasping and stunned.

"Percy, what . . . you're not . . . you're just upset. You aren't thinking clearly . . ." he stammered.

"I've never been thinking more clearly in my life," Percy answered back, trying to lean down and capture Oliver's mouth again, but this time his friend saw it coming.

"Wait, wait, we need to talk, Perce," he insisted, giving his friend a gentle yet firm nudge until he finally rolled over to lie beside Oliver.

Percy's eyes were closed, but tears still seeped out from beneath his lashes. "God, I can't even do this right," he said with a mournful sigh as his tears spilled forward to course down his pale cheeks.

"No, don't, I . . ." Oliver shook his head slightly, trying to make sense of the million thoughts running through it at the moment before finally just asking, "What's this about, Percy?"

Percy's eyes opened, looking up in to the confused gaze of his best friend. They'd been friends since they were children, since they shared a compartment on the Hogwarts Express as scared first years. In a lot of ways, Percy knew that Oliver Wood was his only friend. And now Percy had to go and screw all of that up by telling Oliver the one thing that he'd always kept hidden from the other boy.

"I do love you, Oliver. Not just as my best mate, but as everything. I love you; I'm in love with you. I honestly can't believe that you've never figured it out on your own. I just . . . I never knew how to say it. I didn't want to spoil our friendship. But, what with everything that's happening and now . . . now with Ginny," his voice broke on his sister's name and it took him a moment to continue. "I just thought that I should tell you before something else happened and I might lose the chance for good."

Oliver was listening to his friend speak, but he wasn't quite sure if he believed his ears. Percy loved him? Like, *that* kind of loved him? Surely not . . . surely Percy hadn't felt this way all along and Oliver just didn't pick up on it. After all of the nights that Oliver himself had dreamed of his best friend, waking up feeling both very guilty and very aroused, surely Percy couldn't have been hiding the same secret without either of them knowing.

Still, here he was with no defenses left, pouring his heart out to the only person in the world he truly trusted, and Oliver sat in stunned silence. He had to respond, had to decide if this was real or just . . .

"I love you, too," he whispered, not even realizing until the words had left his mouth that he was going to say them.

Percy met his eyes again, his gaze seeming to question Oliver silently.

"I always have, really," Oliver admitted. "I just . . . I didn't think you . . . and, I need you to be my friend, at least, and . . . but I really do, Perce. I really do love you and that's the truth, I swear."

He didn't know what response he had expected, but another lap full of weeping Percy wasn't at the top of the list. Still, he wasn't complaining; he wrapped his arms around his friend again and held him as Percy continued crying, whimpering out mostly incoherent words, but Oliver caught 'love you' and 'need you' and 'always' somewhere in there.

"It's okay, baby," Oliver whispered soothingly. "It's going to be okay."

Percy was now sprawled over top of Oliver, his arms around Oliver's neck, his face pressed into his shoulder. One of Percy's legs was wedged between Oliver's and Oliver's arms were wrapped tightly around Percy's waist.

"We should probably move from the floor, Perce," Oliver said after a while. He knew that Percy was exhausted from worry and needed some rest. Percy seemed aware of this as well, because at Oliver's suggestion he rose from the floor and held out a hand to Oliver, pulling him up beside him but then keeping a hold on the other boy's hand even after he had made it to his feet.

Oliver smiled, bringing their clasped hands to his lips to place a kiss on Percy's knuckles, then proceeded to lead the way to Percy's bed. He pulled back the blankets and urged Percy under them, then took a seat on the mattress beside him. This didn't seem to please Percy, though.

"Lay down with me, Ol," he said pleadingly and even if he had wanted to, Oliver couldn't have refused him. He pulled the blankets back again and slid beneath them. Within seconds, he found Percy curled around him, his face buried in the warm skin of Oliver's neck and one of his hands clasped tightly by Percy.

"Sleep, love," he said gently. "I'll be right here with you." 'Always,' Oliver thought to himself as he felt Percy's breathing finally even out as sleep overtook him at last. 'I'll always be right here with you.'

THE END

September 8, 2004