Housecall

~ House Call ~

-- Pop! --

Good morning! I'm Miss--

What? Yes, I've come about your son. I'm Miss Davi--

Yes, he's fine and the WCU will be bringing him home directly. But, we at WSS always like to make the initial call. So I thought I'd just pop round by fireplace and--

Miss Davidson. That's right. Yes, I'm from the Ministry and, er, didn't anyone tell you yet?

Oh, dear me. Well, Mr and Mrs Jones, we have confirmed that your son (Kevin, is it?) is indeed a werewolf.

No! Please don't cry, Mrs Jones. Can you get her a tissue? Sorry, I'm not authorised for a full home visit yet until you complete the registration process.

How do we know, Mr Jones? Well, the WCU picked him up last night chasing cars on the A4.

What? Oh, sorry. That's the Werewolf Capture Unit. I'm with Werewolf Support Services, as I said, and I--

Surely you suspected something or other. No? With young children it's so hard to tell sometimes, I suppose.

There, there, Mrs Jones. These things happen, you know. We all must cope as best we can. And at WSS, that's what we--

A nice cup of tea perhaps, Mrs Jones? You're sure you're okay?

Right, then. Here's our pamphlet 'A Werewolf in the Family' for you to read. I'm sure you'll find it really useful. It has loads of great advice: tips on dietary restrictions, age-appropriate toys... that sort of thing. Once you've registered your son, I'll pop by and go over it in lots more detail.

Yes, of course. All werewolves must be registered with the Ministry. Mr Plumley from the Registry will be coming along with the WCU people to get you started on the paperwork. Once that's completed, we'll--

Well, really, Mr Jones! I'm sure that I don't know how long he's been a werewolf, if you don't.

How? Well, you know, in the usual way. It's all covered in our pamphlet, in any case.

Please, let's not get too upset here. Yes, I know werewolves are supposed to be registered. Didn't I just say that? Occasionally, er, accidents do happen and we are all very sorry at the Ministry when they do. That's no reason to get snippy with me, sir!

Now, we have a support group that meets once a month...on the Tuesday after the new moon that would be. And there's the PAW group, er, that's Parents Anonymous of Werewolves, that meets at the full moon. I think you'll find it really helpful, Mr Jones.

Goodness, look at the time! I have another call to make in Aberdeen, so I must pop out. Mornings after the full moon can be quite trying in our office, but we all must cope as best we can. If you have any questions, do send an owl to my attention. That's Miss Davidson, Office of Werewolf Support Services, Being Division, Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures.

Cheerio!

-- Pop! --