Decisions

Harry lay sprawled out on his bed, deep in thought. He was thinking about one of the main things he'd thought about ever since he got back from Hogwarts: Cho. But in that fortnight, his thoughts had changed. A lot.

At first, all he could think of was the usual crush stuff. But after a few days, he realized something about all of this. Although he still liked Cho, a few things were quite wrong.

He had realized that she probably liked him back. After all, his so called attempts at cheering her up that night after the feast had failed miserably. However, it seemed like she quite honestly was cheered up by everything. This delighted him when he realized it, but since then, it didn't look quite as appealing.

She only liked him because he was famous. Harry was sure of this. Why else would she even pay attention to a skinny little boy a year younger than her? If he was just a normal boy, Harry strongly doubted Cho would even know his name. She had a million admirers waiting around every corner. She wouldn't waste her time on him.

This brought Harry to his second point. He only liked her because she was beautiful. This might have been the reason for a million romances before him, but he still wasn't quite satisfied with it. When he really thought about it, Harry couldn't even think of any personal details about her, only basic information. Like she was in Ravenclaw and had just finished her fifth year. She was good at Quidditch. Stuff like that. He didn't even know her birthday or anything.

No, Harry refused to start a romance like that. Famous Harry Potter and his drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend. The thought suddenly made Harry quite sick.

But, despite all this, he couldn't truly get over her. He cursed whatever hormone in his body was causing this. If he sat still and didn't think of anything for a moment too long, her face would pop into his head, only to be banished with much difficulty. This was fine for now; he hadn't seen or heard from a soul besides the Dursleys since he had left Hogwarts. But in public, this could get out of control and lead to some rash decisions.

Well, Harry thought, searching out the window for a sign of life, at least I don't have this problem right now. Rather far from it. He searched the sky for Hedwig for the millionth time today. She had disappeared shortly after he returned to Privet Drive and he hadn't seen her since. He sorely missed being able to communicate with his friends.

A sudden flash of white made him start, then jump up in happiness. Hedwig had finally returned. She flew in the window, with a letter tied to her leg. Harry rushed to the desk where the letter had been dropped and turned it over. He immediately wished Hedwig hadn't come back at all. In his hand was the object he had dreaded for the last week. He knew it would probably come eventually, but he didn't want it to.

He had received a letter from Cho.

* * * * *

A couple hours later, Harry sat on the floor beside his desk, deep in thought. The letter remained unopened, lying on the edge of the desk near him. He knew he had to open the letter eventually, but he was putting it off as long as possible.

He had to admit, besides the fear, his first reaction to the letter had been excitement. He still couldn't completely get over Cho and that was why he was so scared to open the letter. What if it contained a sweet, well-written note, wrote solely to try and win him over? Of course she probably thought she had him already, but still. Harry wasn't sure his self-control could stand up to something like that. If he did something he would deeply regret later...

With a loud sigh, Harry stood up. He grabbed the letter off the desk and slowly slit open the envelope. He had to read it sometime. Might as well get it over with. He pulled out a piece of thick, cream-colored paper, unfolded it, and began to read.

Dear Harry,

Our last meeting was brief, I know, and I never got the chance to say goodbye the next day. But I must confess, I've developed feelings for you, feelings that I believe you share. I'm not asking you out or anything, it's too soon after Cedric's death for that. But I do want to get to know you better. I'd like to see you sometime over the summer. Please write back as soon as you can with your response.

Yours forever,

Cho

Harry gulped. This was exactly what he had been afraid of. Even if Cho wasn't asking him out, he was honest enough with himself to admit that was a possibility. It was one thing to fight the thoughts away in the privacy of his bedroom. It was quite another to think of having to keep himself under control when it was just the two of them.

Part of him was screaming that he should stop being so stupid and just accept. He was thinking too much. This was a good thing, right? But Harry could never live with that. The only problem was to figure out exactly how to refuse.

Harry had never been good with this type of thing. One time when he was ten, still going to the Muggle school, a quiet girl in his class came up to him one day and asked him out. Part of him had been touched, realizing that Dudley hadn't gotten everyone to hate him. But Harry was still a ten-year-old boy, and he still didn't associate with girls at all. He was a little harsh when he refused, and the girl ran away crying. Harry didn't see her the rest of the day, and felt a pang of guilt.

True, he had grown up quite a bit since that whole incident. But the problem still remained. He might be a nice guy but every girl he turned down for the Yule Ball looked quite shaken and sad. Except for the one Slytherin fifth year, but Harry didn't want to think about her.

Harry decided he needed help. Cho was still a nice person, in his mind anyway. He had heard the rumors, but had a problem believing them. Harry didn't want to hurt her feelings further, especially since it had been so soon since Cedric's death.

Harry felt a pang in deep in his chest. He always tried not to think of anything to do with that fateful day. He could do little about it. It wasn't worth the emotional turmoil the thoughts caused. That was probably one of the main reasons why he had thought of Cho so much.

Harry's thoughts jerked back to the current problem. Who could possibly give him help on how to gracefully refuse Cho?

It couldn't be Ron. He would think Harry was crazy for refusing her at all. Harry's impulsiveness and naivety was nothing compared to Ron. Hermione wouldn't understand; she had never really approved of his crush on Cho anyways. And besides, he never did tell those two about where he was after the Leaving Feast. He had managed to change the subject at breakfast, and everyone was too busy to think about it later. Even though nothing bad or anything happened, Harry still didn't want to mention it to them. At least not until he had all of this straightened out.

Past his two best friends, Harry had problems thinking of anyone else. He knew someone had to be out there, but who? He sat down and thought of what he was looking for.

The person should probably be a girl. Only a girl would understand how a girl would react. He wanted someone he knew pretty well. Someone caring and kind. The answer hit him all of a sudden. Harry couldn't believe he had been so stupid.

Ginny. Who else would be better to ask? She had gotten over her crush with him, or she at least had better control over it. He had gotten into some rather intelligent conversations with her last year, and she didn't blush once. Harry immediately sat down and drafted a letter to her.