When You Wish Upon a Star

When You Wish Upon a Star
by Christabell

Chapter Fifteen: Of Correspondences and Classes

Dear Lily,
How are you doing? I hope that you are feeling a bit better than you were when I last saw you. It's always difficult dealing with the death of someone close to you; I would know. Don't blame yourself for what happened either. You couldn't have prevented our parents' death anymore than James or I could have.
To be blunt, it really sucks that this happened. At least Hogwarts will offer a lot of support. Some of the kids in my year went through tough times, but people were always there to help them out. But I'm still worried about Jamie. Please, just make sure you are there for him if he needs. If he looks upset, just take him out of class. If anyone has problems with that, just send them to me to deal with.
See, the thing with Jamie is that he thinks he needs to be strong for everyone that he loves and everyone around him. If he's feeling bad, he won't say anything, and that's what worries me about him. He'll let something eat away at him until it becomes too much for him and he just breaks down. I've seen it happen only twice before, and it's awful. So please, watch out for my little brother.
I've usually asked Siri to look out for him when I wasn't there, but I think that you will be able to help him a lot more right now. James and I have always been close, but it used to be my job to keep him out of trouble. I'm only 21, so for my last few years at Hogwarts, I could do it. It's been hard letting him grow up without me there. But I trust that you love him and will do everything you can to keep him safe. I already think of you as a sister, and I know that someday you will be. I only hope that I will be here to see that. Lily, thank you.

Katherine Potter

~~~~~~~~~

Lily, making her way down to the dungeons for Potions class walked through the halls of Hogwarts, shivering at their eerie silence. It seemed like everyone had found out about her parents, and were now treating her like they afraid that she was so fragile, she would break at any second. She glanced upward, and her gaze fell on James. She ran over and enveloped him in a hug.

"James, no one will talk to me... they just stare at me and keep on moving. Even Melanie, and Mari, and Tiffany, and Ara... I just don't know what to do," she confessed desperately.

"I know, Lils, I've been seeing it happen. It will be fine. I'll make them stop," he replied, as though he had something to prove. Lily's thoughts drifted back to the letter she had received from Katherine just that morning. Just then, a group of fourth year Hufflepuff girls wandered by. One of them pointed and whispered something, and the rest of the girls stopped and stared at the couple. Lily glared at them, and they quickly scampered away.

"If that happens one more time...."

"I know, I know. You'll kill them or I'll kill them for you," James interrupted. He looked straight down into Lily's eyes, and kissed her deeply.

"James... everyone's going to see..." she said hesitantly.

"Screw everyone else. I don't care what they think. I love you, Lils."

"James, I love you too." Just then, Mike came running by, breathing heavily.

"Gryffindor Quidditch practice ten minutes after the next class," he shouted. He slowed down considerably, staring at Lily and James. "If you don't think you can come..."

"Shut up!" the two yelled in unison. Everyone nearby stopped what they were doing, and turned to look at the scene.

"Seriously, Mike. You think that I can't play Quidditch? Yes, our parents died. Two weeks as of tomorrow. No, they didn't die. They were murdered by Voldemort. Because they wouldn't let him take us. They wanted us to live our lives. Can you deal with that? If we can, why can't you?" The growing crowd began to move backwards at the threat of a furious Lily.

"Uh, sorry..." Mike blurted out, sounding rather shocked.

"It's alright, Mike. It's just that everyone is treating me like I'm about to break at any moment, and I'm so sick of it."

"We'll be at practice, 'kay?" Mike nodded, and set off running again. Lily sighed.

"Whoops."

~~~~~~~~~

Dear Katherine,
I guess we've both been fairly busy lately. Or maybe we always have been, and it's just finally catching up with us now. Whatever the case, we haven't talked in months. I miss our days at Hogwarts, where we were the belles of the balls together. We had so much fun between teasing lil' James about everything, getting any guy we wanted, and still managing the best grades, and holding up our positions - You Head Girl, me top Prefect. Seventh year was so much different than the real world seems to be.
It's funny, being both James' Transfiguration teacher and the Head of his house. I've seen him mature so much this past year, and even in this past week, with the death of your parents. But he's changed now. He's quieter, and doesn't seem to enjoy his pranks quite as much as he used to. The only person who can get him to smile is Lily, but I'm sure you know all about her. Even when Sirius jokes around, all James can get out is a forced, fake sounding laugh. I told you once before that I'd enjoy it if, even for only a day, James would just keep his mouth shut and let me teach. I'll eat those words. It's the most unnerving thing I've ever experienced.
And then, just looking at him, I see you. I worry about you so much, Katy. I never know if maybe, one day I'll wake up and find out that there'll be no more letters from you, no more lunches where we go over every good memory from our amazing seven years together. I'm so scared for you, and I know, as you're reading this, you're scoffing, thinking about how I always was the worry wart. As true as that may be, just look at yourself. I need you to grow old alongside me, so we can be old ladies together, still the best of friends, laughing about how you used to call me Daffy Duck, and I used to call you Katy-Birdie because back in first year, we thought it was cool. Katy, I heard that they are researching a cure for Moribundus Tabes, and I can't help but be hopeful.
No matter what happens, you'll be my best friend forever. So keep on hoping and praying, as I will be, and send me an owl as soon as you can. I miss you, Katy.

Daphne

~~~~~~~~

To say Potions was interesting would have been the over-statement of the month. Needless to say, it dragged by, and even Lily and Severus, who tended to enjoy the class more than they should have, were yawning ten minutes into it. Professor Sagen droned on and on, and for once, hadn't realized that his entire class was misbehaving, and completely ignoring him. Lucius got up, and then silently planted himself in the seat adjacent to Lily and James. James was sleeping lightly on the desk, and Lily was absent-mindedly running her fingers through his hair.

"So Lily, darling, tell me - what exactly do you think about Severus?" the Slytherin whispered in her ear. Lily started at the intrusion of the silky voice.

"Go away, Malfoy," she hissed through her teeth.

"Only if you tell me...." he pressed.

"I think he's nice enough."

"Yes, he is very nice, isn't he..." Lucius agreed, as if he wanted to persuade her of something.

"Ummm.... he's very skilled at making Potions. I dunno...." she trailed off. "What do you want me to say?" she turned around to question him, only to realize that Lucius was already back in his seat next to Severus, smirking at her. "What the hell was that about?" she asked herself quietly.

"What the hell was what about?" James suddenly inquired, after hearing what he supposed to be Lily talking to herself. Lily shook her head.

"I... nothing." He looked at her, slightly puzzled, but decided not to push the issue. Lily felt a tap on her shoulder, and she whirled around, only to find Severus sitting there.

"Lily... I don't know exactly what Lucius was after when he came over here, but I'd like to apologize for whatever he said."

"When was Malfoy over here?" James butted in, but Lily shrugged him off.

"I'll explain later. But Severus, you don't need apologize for him. He actually only asked me what I thought of you."

"Lily, are you free later today? Right after class? Or this evening?" At this James glared menacingly at him.

"No, she's not."

"James!" Lily hissed, her annoyance showing through her tone. "Let me talk for myself. You needn't treat me like a baby."

"I can if I want to. I don't want you to talk with him anymore."

"Stop it...." she pleaded.

"Who are you to make me? I don't have to listen to you."

"Oh, James, just shut up. I don't know what's wrong with you, but don't talk to me until you have it figured out." She turned abruptly back to her friend, and smiled, looking almost ashamed. "I... I'm sorry about that."

"I feel like it's my fault for being over here..."

"Your presence shouldn't be a reason for James to turn into an over-protective brat," she turned to glare at him. "Anyway, no, I'm not free right after class... I have Quidditch. But I'm not doing anything after that..."

"I need to meet with you and Dumbledore. Can I trust you to find your way to his office right after your practice?"

"Of course... is anything wrong?"

"Not yet... maybe... I dunno... I can't really talk about it now..." Lily nodded understandingly.

"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can be." Severus flashed a rare and thankful smile at her before hurrying back to his seat. Sagen wrapped up his lecture, and Lily hurried off to the girl's locker room to change for her practice, ignoring her boyfriend.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Evans, would you just catch the snitch already? You're so slow!" James yelled furiously.

"James, calm down. She's only had half a minute..." Mike pointed out.

"Corkian, why the hell aren't you up there?" Mike shrugged, and grabbed his beaters club in one hand and flew upwards.

"I'm up, Captain," he replied sarcastically. "Travis, get up here before Mr. Potter shoots an unforgivable at you," he joked to his fellow beater.

"Sanders, where the..."

"James, do us all a favor and just SHUT UP!" Lily screamed. "I don't care what's wrong with you, because you have no reason to take it out on everyone else. Maybe you're mad at me, maybe not, but right not, we have practice, so take it off the Pitch. If you can't, then just leave."

"I hate you, Evans." He stalked off, with his broom slung over his shoulder. Lily stared at his retreating form, forcing her tears from showing.

"Would you mind taking over, Sirius?" Lily asked through a forced voice. He nodded, and the practice resumed. Lily found her moves now almost mechanical, as James' words began to run through her head. 'He hates me...' She was relieved when the practice concluded, and sped right to the locker room.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Lily?" she heard a timid voice.

"What?" she asked, poking her head out of the shower. "Hang on, I'll be out in a minute." She dried herself off quickly, and changed into her school robes, only to find Kathleen Spinnet, one of the chasers along with James and Sirius, sitting there.

"Hey Lily."

"Hey Kathleen. What's up?"

"I... I know we aren't really close, even though we are the only two girls on the team... I mean, I'm still a fifth year, and you're Head Girl, and you're always with James... Well, I just wanted you to know that you really shouldn't worry about what he said. I know that he didn't mean it, and just by looking at you guys, I can tell you both really love each other. So talk to him, and don't let it get to you, okay?" Kathleen looked up, hopefully. Lily suddenly smiled at the younger girl. Maybe she wasn't that young... the bouncy blond curls always made her appear younger than she was, but she really was quite smart.

"Thanks. And I really mean that. I probably would have gone off and moped about it, and that.... well, it really helped. We really should get to know each other better. It's hard being surrounded by just the guys sometimes." Kathleen nodded.

"Well, I'd hate to keep you, I'm sure you have something you have to be doing that's more important..." she trailed off as a look of horror crossed Lily's face.

"Crap! I'm supposed to be meeting with Dumbledore and Severus... crap... now I'm going to be late. Thanks again, Kathleen!" she yelled over her shoulder as she sprinted up towards the main entrance of Hogwarts. The younger girl giggled slightly as the sight of her Head Girl running, her robes flapping wildly, carrying all her Quidditch supplies, nearly dropping each of them once. Hopefully things would go well with her and James.

~~~~~~~~~~

I've been told that I should write to you. I'm supposed to say 'I'm sorry' about what I said at Mum's and Dad's funeral. We were brought up not to lie. So I can't say that. I meant every word that I said. It's your fault that they died, and I hate you for it. This is the last time you will ever hear from me. I am disowning you, and I am going to forget that you ever existed. There never was any Lily Evans to ruin my life. And that really is what you did. Oh yes, I'm getting married to Vernon Dursley next week. I didn't think you'd want to be there, and even if you had wanted to come, you'd just ruin everything anyway. So goodbye, and good riddance.

Petunia

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm so sorry I'm late," Lily gasped. Dumbledore smiled down at her.

"Don't worry about. Sit down, Lily. We have important things to talk about. I'm sure you've heard of Severus' involvement with Voldemort," he paused briefly, almost surprised at Lily's lack of reaction to the name, then continued. "and it has come to his attention that you may be in danger."

"What do you mean?"

"I... I think I could best explain this, Headmaster," Severus offered. "I'm afraid that part of this is my fault. You are a very charismatic person, and as I grew to know you better, I found myself more and more attracted to you. Lucius noticed this, and I had to cover it up, or else be tortured by Voldemort for letting my attention drift on to a muggle-born." He stopped, recalling the conversation that had occurred between him and Lucius.

"Severus, have you been taught nothing? Why the hell did you partner up with the mudblood?" Lucius hissed. Severus smirked calmly.

"Why do you think? If I get her to trust me, then we will be able to get her on our side. She is a very excellent witch, no matter what her blood may be. I doubt that our Master would want someone like that fighting against him when he knew there was a chance to have her on our side. Just think, Lucius. Everything I do is in the best interest of our Master." Lucius grinned evilly.

"You are a smart one, aren't you? Get her to trust you with anything. No, get her to love you. She will not go against you then. This is an excellent plan. I shall reveal it to our Master at once."

"Lucius mentioned this to Voldemort. Lily, he wants you on his side. He's noticed your strengths, and knows how much they could benefit him. That's why he killed your parents. He wanted to get rid of anyone who might send you away from him."

"Well he sure as hell has gone about it the wrong way..."

"I know. But now, I've gotten an assignment from him. I... I'm supposed to make you trust me, and then have you fall in love with me. From there, I'd be convincing you to join him. If that doesn't work, it's safe to say that I'll be killed for failing my mission, and you... I'm not sure what would happen to you..." Severus looked at her uncertainly.

"....."

"Say something, damnit!"

"What do you want me to say? I just found out that if I don't fall in love with you, I'll cost you your life, and who knows, maybe mine. What the hell am I supposed to say?"

"We're already working on it, Miss Evans. I will not let anything happen to my students. Besides, he can not act on anything further until you have graduated, so we may be able to keep you safe."

"Oh."

"I'm sorry, Lily... I really didn't mean for this to happen...."

"I know that, Severus. It's just that this is sort of hard to deal with. Can I go now?"

"Yes, you may. Just remember that running away will not solve your problems."

"Right. Bye, Headmaster, Severus."

"And Lily? Do talk to James, and work everything out." She gave him a strange look, and then headed off slowly, obviously deep in thought.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It took Lily nearly half an hour to make her way up to Gryffindor Tower and when she finally reached the seventh floor of Hogwarts, she wasn't so certain she wanted to be there anyway. Right as she was about to turn away, Kathleen popped out of the portrait hole.

"Lily, go talk to him. You really have to."

"Am I that obvious?" she asked ruefully. "I don't exactly want to talk to him right now..."

"Go. Talk. Now." Kathleen grinned at her before pushing her in the room. She waved, and then walked off in the opposite direction. Lily stumbled over her feet before tripping on the floor, only to be caught by Peter.

"Guess I'm not the only clumsy one, huh?" he teased. Lily smiled at her friend. "He's up in our dorm. No one else is in there."

"Thanks, Peter. Just... cover for me, will you? It would look really bad for someone to see me going up there..."

"Sure thing. I don't mind." Lily quickly ran up the stairs before pausing at the door to the seventh year boys dorm. Making up her mind, she knocked on it firmly.

"Just come in, and then leave me alone," James yelled. Lily gulped, and then entered the room.

"You didn't really mean what you said, did you? You can't really hate me... right?" James just stared at her.

"You have some nerve, coming up here to talk to me, after what you said before... I can't believe you..."

"Just give me an answer. Did you mean what you said on the Pitch?" James didn't respond.