Love Me, Love Me Not

Chap. 03 - Stuck With You

"You're what?"

Harry was having a nightmare. What else could explain this strange reality where Draco Malfoy was in his house, lecturing him about his life and claiming to be the one who would help him out of his misery? The world had certainly been turned upside down. The obvious thing to do was to kick Draco out, but the pain in Harry's head was killing him, and he just wanted to lie down. He didn't lie down, but he did throw up when they reached the kitchen while Draco was inspecting the mess. The smell of rotten food was too much for his sensitive stomach.

"Well, I don't blame you," Draco muttered as he watched Harry emptying his stomach in a corner. "The mansion really needs cleaning desperately, Potter. I feel like throwing up too. Ugh." Draco made a disgusted face as he saw worms on an old slice of pizza. His stomach turned. "You really need help..."

Harry slowly sat next to the table and rested his head against his hands. He closed his eyes but that didn't help with the dizziness. "I don't need help. I'm fine on my own, Malfoy."

"If you were fine, Potter, you would have thrown me out by now," Draco said sitting next to him.

Harry raised his head to glare at Draco. "Damned right I would have."

"Yeah, but you don't have the energy to do it... Hangover?" Draco asked sweetly.

That tone of voice took Harry by surprise, but he didn't let his guards down. "Why the fuck do you care?"

"I know a spell that can make your headache go away," Draco offered. Harry felt tempted to accept Draco's help, but he shook his head. Draco sighed. He didn't blame Harry for not trusting him. "I understand," he said. "Do you at least have some muggle painkillers?"

"Hermione confiscated all of them." Harry didn't bother to explain Hermione's reasons. Draco probably knew anyway. After all, the blond was there because of Hermione. She was once again butting into his life. It was outrageous that she had asked Draco Malfoy to come to his rescue. Harry couldn't understand her reasons for sending him Malfoy. When he got better, he would phone her. "Why did she send you?"

Draco shrugged. "I'm as surprised as you, Potter. Apparently, I'm your shock therapy," he sneered.

A rush of nausea came upon Harry. "Shock therapy, huh?" he grimaced. "Bloody hell, they sure are desperate..." Harry was convinced that this was all a bad dream, and that soon he would wake up and his life would return to normal.

"Where's your house-elf?" Draco asked.

"Didn't Hermione, the bloody traitor, tell you everything about my fucked up life? The house-elf is long gone. I fired her."

"Then you need another one. This place sucks, Potter. Don't tell me you don't have the money. Even if you don't, there are still many house-elves who would work for free."

Harry glared at him. "I do have the money. I have my parents' money, Sirius' money and I have the big prize for vanquishing Voldemort. I also got a medal of honour for my services. So as you can see, even if I lived a thousand years, I would still have a lot of money to spend... Money isn't the bloody problem, Malfoy. I just don't want anyone meddling in my life, least of all you." Harry rose from the chair and tried to send his best threatening look towards Draco's direction. "That's why I want you out in ten seconds. If you're still here by the time I wake up, I'll make you feel very sorry."

Draco seemed unaffected by Harry's harsh words, which infuriated Harry even more.

"Get the fuck out of here, Malfoy! What do you think you'll achieve by staying? Jesus! Are you out of your fucking mind?" he shouted. "What makes you think you can help me? You of all people! We haven't seen each other in what? Four or five years? And what the fuck! We never got along. We hate each other, for Merlin's sake! You can't just expect to walk in here and treat me as if we were best friends all along! Hermione was probably doped when she had the stupid idea to send you here!"

"I didn't want to come here, Potter, believe me," Draco said coldly.

"Then why? What did she promise you?" Harry sneered victoriously as he realised he had hit the target. "I knew it. You would never agree to this if you didn't get something in return. What is it? Money? Better accommodations for daddy in prison?"

"Free tickets for the whole Quidditch Season, actually," Draco said composedly, but boiling inside at the mention of his father.

For a moment, Harry didn't know what to say. He didn't expect Draco to answer him so easily. If he remembered correctly, the Draco he had met in the Order would have been outraged by Harry's accusations. The Draco from before had been an annoying prick with a very bad mouth and a high dose of hypocrisy. Harry didn't want to have anything to do with him. Even if Hermione trusted that bastard, Harry would never welcome him. He had endured Draco in the past because he had to. They had worked side by side; it couldn't have been any different. But now he didn't want Draco here. Draco bothered him too much. If only he wasn't feeling so ill. Then he would have kicked Draco out in a second.

"I'll get you all the free tickets you want if you just get out of my house."

Draco seemed thoughtful. Then the blond shook his head. "They made the offer first, Potter. Besides, I'm actually trying to be nice for a change... I owe the Weasleys a lot. I owe Hermione my life. So I think I'm going to stick with their offer."

Harry clenched his fists and Draco stood up quickly to avoid being hit. Harry felt his limbs getting tired, and he turned his back on Draco to climb back to his room. First he needed to clear up his mind. Then he would deal with Draco properly. He wouldn't get anywhere the way he was feeling now.

And in fact, he didn't. He collapsed from exhaustion before reaching the last steps of the stairs. Luckily, Draco was right behind him to prevent a spectacular fall. He shivered at the first contact with Draco's fingers and arms. He felt strange. It was the first time that Draco had touched him with such tenderness, and it confused him. He blamed the alcohol for making him so weak and puzzled. He wanted to push Draco away but it felt strangely nice to be held like that. He had the impression that Draco's hands were trembling, but he couldn't be sure. Everything seemed like a surreal dream.

Draco helped him climb the last steps and get to his room with difficulty. Then Harry was laid carefully on his bed. He felt Draco's fingers gently caressing his forehead. Green eyes met blue ones questioningly, but Draco averted his gaze.

Draco touched the tip of his wand to Harry's forehead. Harry wanted to shout, to run away, to curse Hermione for sending the enemy to come to him. But the faded yellow ray of light that came out of Draco's wand didn't harm him. It only made his head light and his eyes heavier.

'Sweet dreams, Potter' was the last thing Harry heard before falling into a deep sleep.

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Draco left Harry the moment he noticed the raven-haired man's breath had steadied. He then shut the door of the bathroom and breathed hard. In, out, in, out. It was like an exercise to keep himself together. He was trembling all over, and it was hard not to fall to the ground as his legs had turned into jelly.

He had touched Harry. He looked at his hands as if they were alien to him. It had felt so good to touch Harry, just like he had thought it would. He had felt a jolt running through his body, exciting every pore. It had been electrifying and now he couldn't stop shaking. And that was only their first encounter.

It was a mistake to have come. He should have politely denied Hermione's request. He didn't want to open old wounds. He didn't want to know for sure what he felt for Harry. He had a good thing going with Bill. So what was he doing here?

He took a deep breath and ordered himself to stop behaving like a sissy. His hands were now deathly cold. He could walk out on Harry. Harry wouldn't even remember Draco's presence in his house if Draco left that exact minute and never came back.

But he couldn't go away. The masochist in him wanted to stay.

He went back to Harry's messy room - the same room that had belonged to Sirius Black - and watched him sleep. He watched the lightning-bolt scar on his forehead covered almost entirely by the thick black hair. Harry's hair was longer than he remembered. It almost reached his shoulders. Draco felt like burying his hands in it, but he held himself in check. Then his eyes went down examining Harry's eyelashes, nose, until he finally met his lips. Harry's lips had once tempted his sexual fantasies. The same lips that were so juicy in his dreams were now very dry. Harry had been mistreating his body so much.

Draco knew Harry had been through a lot of pain, but he couldn't understand why a strong person like Harry had given in to depression. Harry was such a good person. He had saved the wizarding world. He was beautiful, intelligent, rich, loved. Everything came easy to him. He was the best Seeker Draco had ever met. Wasn't it because of those qualities that Draco had hated him so much in the past?

Harry could have had everything and yet... He was slowly killing himself. Draco had seen so many bottles of bourbon, vodka and rum spread throughout the house that he had lost count.

He couldn't understand it. Draco was the one who should have been immersed in self-pity. He was the one who should have lost himself along the way. Draco felt as if somehow he and Harry had switched roles. It was Harry who was supposed to be an Auror, not him. Draco's life had had everything go wrong. Harry's life had had everything go right. But Draco was the only one who managed to leave his past behind and make something out of his screwed up existence. Harry was still lost in all of his misfortunes.

Draco sighed. He didn't know exactly what to do. He didn't even know if staying was the right option. But first things first. The house could use some cleaning...