A Girl's Song

Disclaimer: Lalala, I don’t own sheeeat…hehehe

Chapter Three: Do You Love Her?

Harry stood alone at the far end of the Gryffindor girls dormitory. The fresh spring air was suddenly hot and stifling; he felt rivulets of sweat run down his nose. Other Gryffindors were heading out of the common room to go to dinner, but Harry suddenly couldn't move. For the past five years, he had kind of taken the secrecy of Ginny's crush on him for granted. As long as she didn't openly show her feelings, things would be all right. But now, the comfort of pretending not to know and the security of not having to make a decision was gone. Harry sighed and closed his eyes.

Ginny.

Suddenly in his mind’s eye, Harry could picture a spring day about a month ago during Easter. He, along with the rest of the Weasley family, were at the Burrow, having Easter dinner. Harry had been feeling down, escaped outside to do some thinking. He had found Ginny there and for lack of better things to do, he had sat down next to her for a chat.

They had had a meaningful talk, about everything from Harry’s guilt over Cedric’s death (about which only Ron and Hermione knew) and Ginny’s feelings of inferiority ( which Harry suspected he only knew). It was a wonderful talk, one with reflections and one that revealed a surprisingly mature Ginny. For the very first time, Harry had found himself thinking, “I could be friends with this girl.”

Afterwards they had sat in companionable silence. Harry knew for a fact what a bright, funny, smart, vivacious young girl Ginny was. He smiled. She wasn't bad to look at either. But after coming back to school, Harry and Ginny had had an unspoken agreement to forget the truths that had been uncovered. After all, Ginny was Ron's sister, and Harry his best friend. It couldn't work, no matter how much he wanted to laugh when Ginny hinted at little inside jokes they had developed.

The hurt that flashed through her eyes every time he ignored her attempt to recapture that magical talk eased with time.

Harry sighed again. Slowly, he trudged back out the portrait hole towards the Great Hall. What would he do? There was no way he wanted to hurt Ginny, but there was also no way he could make this thing with her work. As Harry entered the Hall, giving a half-hearted smile and feeble wave every now and then, a small voice pinged in his head.

Why can't you be with her? She's a girl, isn't she?

Harry slid onto a seat at the Gryffindor table. "Of course she's a girl," he grumbled. "But don't be stupid. We can't go out." He jumped as Ron and Hermione slid into the seats adjacent to him.

"Who're you talking to, Harry?" Hermione looked at Harry concernedly, Ron mirroring her look.

Harry smiled quickly. "Nothing. Nobody. Just-just that assignment that Snape gave us." As Ron launched into an immediate tirade against their greasy Potions teacher, Harry let his mind wander again.

But really, what was holding him back from Ginny? He knew for a fact that Ron wouldn't mind. In fact, he'd probably be estatic. And it wasn't a question of whether or not Ginny liked him; he knew that answer. Cho? He shook his head. Cho was a great girl, and he would always like her. But she was still grieving. He couldn't handle that anymore. Harry guessed that the only thing stopping him from going out with Ginny was his own doubt of whether he liked her.

She was beautiful. She was smart. She made him laugh, and of course she was brave. He had seen that countless times. She could keep a secret. She understood how he felt, his deepest fears. And she genuinely cared for him, not for his image.

Harry stood and smacked his head accidentally on a floating treacle pudding.

Of course! He had to have liked Ginny! All those times he had spoken of his perfect girl, someone with all the aforementioned qualities, why, he had been describing Ginny. With a new resolve and a quite sudden burst of passion, Harry turned and strode to his dormitory. He had some thinking to do.

* * *

It was midnight when Harry was stirred out of bed by Ron. He had spent the whole evening composing a letter to Ginny about how he felt.

"Wha-? What's wrong?" Harry looked up at Ron's pale face.

"Harry," Ron whispered shakily, "It's Ginny. She went out around five o clock and Hermione just told me she hasn’t come back." He shook his rumpled red head.

"She's gone. Ginny's gone."