My Thousand Wrongs

My Thousand Wrongs

Chapter One

By: Azkaban Riddle

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"When did my feelings change for him? When did he become more than one of my best friends?"

Hermione and Ginny were at the girl's dormitory. It was quite empty- Parvati had gone with Harry to Hogsmeade and Ron had joined them with Parvati's sister, Padma, to make a double date.

Hermione was sitting on the edge of her bed while Ginny was on a chair in front of Hermione. Both girls were wearing Muggle clothes and had their hair up in a ponytail.

Today was a special day, not only because it was Christmas time, but because today there was a Yule Ball due to take place in the school for the whole population of students. Also, as a bonus for all the students in third year and up, there was a Hogsmeade visit. It still wouldn't be so much fun as before though, because the whole village was swarming with Aurors from the Ministry of Magic.

Mostly everyone wished to stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas Holidays this year, what with Lord Voldemort and other things. So the Yule Ball was very convenient to calm everyone's nerves down, or for some people like Hermione, to pull them up a lot more than before....

Ginny was sitting in front of Hermione with a look of full concern. Hermione was her friend, and she needed help. Ginny could tell Hermione was hiding her feelings from her two best friends; something was troubling her...

Ginny sensed this, and when Hermione was getting ready to go to Hogsmeade- by herself; all alone by the way- Ginny asked her if anything was troubling her. Naturally, Hermione denied it. By the time Ginny asked her this question four times in a row, Hermione finally cracked and broke down in tears.

Ginny told Ron and Harry to go on with their dates but without Hermione, as she wasn't feeling her best. They appeared worried, but Ginny assured them Hermione would be well off in her hands. She successfully managed to thwart them off easily.

"What are you talking about, Hermione?" asked Ginny. She had a very puzzled look on her face.

"Ginny, you know what I'm talking about! Did you even hear what I said a few moments ago?" asked an exasperated Hermione.

"I'm sorry, 'Mione, I didn't. I was thinking about some other things," Ginny replied. Hermione rolled her eyes quickly and continued.

"I just don't know what to do anymore Ginny. I... I don't know how I got this way! First, I was astounded that I had met him back in my First year. By the end of that same year, I had developed somewhat of a crush towards him, but I always kept it secret.

"In my Second year, the crush deepened, yes, but it was an admiration crush more than anything now. I admired him more and more each time, each year... He was turning from the friend to the brother I never had, or so I thought...

"In our Fourth year, I realized I had been wrong. I truly cared about him a lot. Even though your brother, Ron, attracted me a lot, I knew that I didn't feel the same towards him than towards Harry." She paused, looking as if she couldn't tell Ginny the truth, but she continued nonetheless.

"I knew he had a crush on Cho Chang, but I still had a little seed of hope planted in my heart, that one day he would look at me in a new light. The hope that he would look at me like the girlfriend he could have; the woman he could love for life, not just like the sister he never had or the helpful friend who's always there for him.

"My heart was broken when he never asked me to the Yule Ball back in Fourth year, and gave up that option myself when I accepted to go with Viktor Krum. Viktor is a... wonderful man, I have to admit. He always wanted to go serious with me, but I never accepted. I just couldn't. I had a great time with Viktor, but I always remembered Harry.

"Harry has changed my life completely. Well, actually, I don't have a real life; I'm just a servant of Harry Potter and his dreams, his ambitions, his everything. Because Harry is my life. My whole life. Without him- without Harry- I am truly nothing. Nothing at all..."

Ginny looked as if she wanted to say something to Hermione, but Hermione felt as if a great weight was being lifted off her shoulders. As so, she continued.

"When I went with Viktor to the Yule Ball, I dressed up and made myself as beautiful as I could. I wanted to make Harry jealous, of course, but all the time he had been jealous of Chang and the late Cedric Diggory. He did not even give me a second glance at all, but my hope still remained Ginny, even through all....

" When he came back from that maze at the end of the Triwizard with defeat written all over his face, I was so scared. I was frightened for us both, but more for him. I had never seen him that way before...

"I just wanted to hug him; to kiss him and never let him go from my sight ever again. I wanted to comfort him and tell him that I would always be there for him, but I couldn't. Why? I do not even know why myself."

Ginny didn't know what to say. She was utterly speechless and clue less. Could Hermione be talking about Harry? The Harry Potter; Ginny's love of her life? Can she be talking about her love? This could not be possible! Every Weasley knew that Hermione had to fancy Ron, they were just made for each other....

They had their arguments because of small, simple little things, of course, but always magnified them so they could be closer to each other than ever before, right? Whenever someone laid eyes on Ron and Hermione arguing people always would say they would make such a lovely couple. Even so, right now in front of Ginny, was Hermione confessing her undying love towards Harry Potter instead of Ron Weasley, like it should have been...

"You...You love him, Hermione?" Ginny's voice had turned cold and hard. Hermione gave Ginny a curious glance and responded.

"Yes, Ginny. I could never lie to you. I love him with all my heart..."

Ginny's stare hardened. 'So,' she thought. ' Another competitor... Can people not make it so damn hard for themselves and realize beforehand that I'm the only one who Harry could possibly love? That I am the only one who really loves Harry and has a small chance with him? Because anyone who is not me doesn't.'

Even though she was mad, Ginny was continuing to be curious. No, maybe not curious, "Know the enemy" best described it. Ginny ushered Hermione to continue.

"And so now-" started Ginny, but Hermione continued.

"--I am dying inside, Ginny. I see him and Parvati, just so happy together, so madly in love, and it kills me. It pains me to know that if I had confessed these feelings to Harry, the happiness Parvati has might have been mine. It- I would never had thought I'd say or think this, but every time I see them together and snogging right in front of my face; like showing off their happiness, makes me want to puke.

"It makes me very mad. It makes me want to kill Parvati off for being with my love, and then kill Harry for not ever noticing me or corresponding me these past seven years that we have known each other."

"Oh, I'm sure he'll notice you- eventually," said Ginny. "Though you have to let him know, 'Mione."

"Know what?" Hermione snapped.

"For a witch of your brilliance, you aren't very smart when it comes to these matters, y'know," teased Ginny.

Hermione scowled. Ginny continued. "'Mione, you've got to let Harry know how you feel for him; what you feel towards him... You can't possibly continue your life like this, you can't continue Harry on like this, remember he is your whole life? 'Mione," Ginny leaned forward in her chair towards Hermione, "You've got to tell him. You surely cannot spend who knows how much time asking yourself the 'what if' questions over and over again!"

She imitated Hermione in her now usual bossy voice. "'What if he had asked me to the Yule Ball? What if I told him how I felt and he confessed himself in the same way? What if he loves me? What if I kidnapped Parvati and drank some Polyjuice Potion and fooled Harry and spent a whole lovely night with him pretending to be Parvati?' No, Hermione, no, no, no! You can't continue on like this! You're not only hurting yourself this way but the people surrounding yourself as well!"

Hermione was crying again.

"Ginny, I- you're right! I should tell him, but it's just that... Ugh! I just don't know what to do!"

"Hermione," said Ginny, cautiously. Hermione turned around and looked at Ginny straight in the eyes. Ginny held a determined and resolute look in her eyes that Hermione had never seen in her before.

"Hermione, tell him today!"

"What?" Hermione screamed.

"Tell Harry today! Right now! No, wait, not right now. Tell him at the Yule Ball. Dedicate a song to him that tells him how you feel towards him. Or at least a part of how you feel. Take a chance, Hermione. Take the chance. Harry's either answer is a 'yes' or 'no,' but take the chance... Don't back out now. You were put in Gryffindor for a reason, Hermione. Show us your bravery. Show yourself a change of life. Either for good or bad, a change of life nonetheless.

"Do it, Hermione, and all the 'What if' questions will go away. You'll finally learn the truth, and to Gryffindors, the truth is one of the few things in this world that really and only matter."

Hermione's gaze moved from Ginny's face after this statement. Her gaze settled on the mirror on the side of them. She stared at it for a few moments and then came out of her thinking reverie. She smiled at their reflections in the mirror and raised her index finger to her forehead and traced a lightning bolt with it, meanwhile saying, "I'll do it, Ginny. I'll do it, for my little 'Scarhead.' "

Hermione smiled profoundly. And so did Ginny as well.