Secrets of Sycamore

Dear Ron and Hermione,

I'll already be gone when you've read this, though that doesn't help me know where to begin. The two of you have been there with me through so much, and have given me a friendship words cannot describe. I don't know how to thank-you. I'm going to have trouble explaining my thoughts as I write this letter and prepare to leave, but I have to try.

Please understand that I hate to say goodbye this way, but I don't see another option. Realistically, I don't expect to come back at all. You know what I have to do, and I'm sorry. But I just can't justify having either of you come with me. I wish I could; not having you there goes against what I want, especially after all the things we've gone through. I trust you with my life. But I've already been the cause of too many deaths, and I won't cause any more; least of all one of yours. I know you may hate me or think I'm being dramatic, but I also hope that you will understand why I'm leaving this way, rash as it may be. Dumbledore isn't here to protect me anymore, and I have to grow up now.

It's funny, you know? I never in a million years thought my life would turn out this way. I wonder sometimes if I would have been happier if those letters from Hogwarts had never come. But then I think, what would have become of me? Would my destiny have been any different if I was never truly aware of my past? Just... quietly murdered at Voldemort's hands. Would anyone have cared? Sure, maybe then there would not be a 'hero'. No weapon to end Voldemort's reign of terror. But wouldn't they all have just found someone else? It's not that I am scared to die, or that I won't find all the horcruxes in time to finish Voldemort forever; no, cause doubtless there is someone else who would finish the work and destroy him. I'm scared of what I'll miss. Though death seems a small price to pay to escape all this- what I never asked for! And anyways, there are some people I'd really like to meet on the other side...

But, I have a duty to the people of the wizarding community. After all, they call me the 'Chosen One'. I can't understand why- I'm actually very selfish. This desire to kill Voldemort is more mine than anyone's'. This isn't my destiny, it's my choice; one made a long time ago. But, they look on me as their only chance, with my good will or not. How could I let them down? I'm going to find and destroy the horcruxes, and I am going to kill Lord Voldemort!

I wish you both only the best from here. I will miss you. But after this, if there is an after, I will have to start a new life. I dream of that, you know, and hope that one day I can live a simple life, without people staring or whispering. It's one thing that drives me to do this. That, and the hope of seeing you in better times. Maybe then I can even see Ginny again. Let her know I love her, and that I'm sorry. She seemed to take our break-up well enough, thankfully, and I just hope she still understands. Though if I know her, she may understand better than anyone. I can't bring myself to write her a note; I know I couldn't write anything as beautiful as she deserves, and anyways, this one is hard enough.

Please, tell everyone goodbye, but you can't mention what you know about Voldemort's past, or the horcruxes. I don't want more danger for you or your families, and I know if the wrong people found out you knew anything, there would be serious trouble. I'll be in Godric's Hollow for a while, like I said, but please don't follow me, or allow anyone to try and owl me. It'll only make things harder. I don't know how long I'll be gone: maybe as long as a year, or maybe forever. Live a good life, be happy, and take care of each other, please. That's what I need from you. Wish me luck...

~ Harry