Proving Me Wrong

PROVING ME WRONG

CHAPTER 3

"Infinite Pain"

Lily got off the train and went to find a carriage for herself. She found an empty one, but soon after three seventh year girls clambered in beside her.

"Hello, Lily. Congrats on making Head Girl!" said a blonde haired, blue-eyed girl with a round, good-natured face.

"Thanks, Alice. Did you have a good summer?" Lily replied, forcing a smile while she thought about her own holiday.

"Yes, it was alright, I suppose..." Alice trailed off with a worried expression on her face.

"Why, what happened? Did you and Frank break up?" asked Lily anxiously.

The other two girls started laughing together until Lily glared at them, demanding to know what was wrong.

"Well, you see Lily," started Tabitha, "Alice met Frank's mother during the summer and--"

"And she's the scariest woman I've EVER met!" exclaimed Alice, throwing her hands into the air and standing up in the carriage. "She is terrifying! I feel so sorry for Frank! I was always worried about doing or saying the wrong thing, but she always found something to criticise! Nothing was good enough for her or her son, including me!"

Alice collapsed back down when she finished her outburst and sighed exasperatedly.

Lily said, "I'm sure Frank doesn't care what his mother thinks. It can't have been that bad. She's a person just like the rest of us."

"Lily, you wouldn't understand. You've never had to meet your boyfriend's parents before, it's the most nerve-wracking experience ever."

Lily took offence to this last statement, but forgave Alice immediately. Alice was upset and didn't know what she was saying.

I could have had boyfriends if I wanted, said a little voice inside her head, But they are just men after all, and I know what men do to you...

Lily remembered being very affectionate as a child, but as she grew up and experienced more, she became colder towards people. She didn't like the thought of other people hugging her and kissing her because it was alien to her. Lily had often watched friends hugging at the end of the year, in awe of the ease with which they wrapped their arms around another person and held on tight, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. She couldn't imagine ever being able to do that to someone, especially a boy. Shuddering slightly, she removed herself from the conversation completely and passed the time staring out of the window at the twinkling lights of Hogwarts castle.

The Welcoming Feast passed with no excitement; Lily sat at the end of the Gryffindor table and ate in silence. Lily knew practically everyone in the school on a first name basis and would say "Hello" and "Goodbye", but as far as friendships went, she didn't have any.

However, Lily knew that people did respect her. Since her fifth year when she became a prefect, students of different houses would come to her for help because they knew she got things done, unlike one Remus Lupin who let his friends make a mockery of the school rules.

Lily was exceptionally gifted at Charms, and this came in handy when repairing any of the damage the Marauders made to her, or anyone else's appearance. Yes, Lily Evans could fix whiskers, flipper feet, and polka-dot skin, like that.

This was probably why Potter and Black were the constant thorn in her side; they always wanted to see if there was something she couldn't fix herself, something permanent.

They were always pushing her, hoping to push her over the edge, and when it happened, she knew, they would both rue the day they met Lily Anne Evans.

After the feast, Lily felt rather than saw Professor McGonagall's pointed look and immediately walked across to the staff table. Potter followed Lily over and gave her a knowing smirk before turning his attention to the stern witch in front of him.

"Mr. Potter, Miss Evans. Please follow me to your quarters."

She walked briskly out of the Great Hall and up many flights of stairs with the two teenagers following her, finally halting in front of a large painting.

The portrait was of a boy and girl standing side by side. They were both wearing Hogwarts robes and seemed to be whispering excitedly out of the sides of their mouths.

"Here we are," McGonagall said, "The password is 'Cum tacent, clamant'"

Lily and James both nodded in assent.

"I think that's everything," she said turning away, "Oh yes, Mr. Potter?"

James looked at his Head of House with an expression of innocence and replied, "Yes, Professor?"

"May I remind you that no one other than you and Miss Evans are allowed in those quarters? No one?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said, giving the professor a smile that she returned.

Lily was disgusted. Look at the state of him, she thought, thinking he can win over a teacher with his stupid grins. Oh my God! She's actually falling for it! You think you know someone after seven years...

Lily suddenly realised that she was standing alone in the corridor and that Potter had already crawled in through the hole leading to their dorms.

***

James heard Evans follow him through the portrait hole and smirked, it was time to put his plan into action.

Lily started walking around their common room, and while she examined the bookcase in the corner James pointed his wand at her and murmured, scabios.

To his delight she immediately stiffened and closed her eyes, muttering under her breath. Suddenly her eyes shot open again, and she walked quickly to her room slamming the door shut behind her.

"What's the matter Evans, itching to get started with schoolwork?" called James with glee.

One thing bothered him though. He wondered why she didn't threaten him with a hex, and he had expected her to be screaming at him by now. James admitted to himself that it was obvious that he did it. Was Evans going stupid? No, that couldn't be it. He still wondered why she was taking it so quietly. God knows it must be irritating, maybe even painful.

Brushing his thoughts of Evans aside, James took the time to observe his new home.

Naturally, it was decorated with deep burgundy and gold drapes, cushions, and throws. There were two comfortable looking sofas in front of the fire, which was crackling merrily.

There was a large bookcase in the corner, and James knew for a fact that he would not be using that very often. He then spotted the door with a knob shaped like a lion's head that presumably led to the Gryffindor common room. He went through the door to be greeted with shouts of adoration from his fellow Gryffindors. That night's celebratory bash meant that James didn't get to bed until the early hours of the morning.

If he had returned sooner James would have realised that Lily hadn't come out of her room at all.

***

Lily had been looking at all of the books in front of her, her thirst for knowledge creeping back to the surface again when suddenly her already stinging back became incredibly itchy. There had always been the possibility of her wounds becoming infected, but Lily usually was able to make a simple salve for her gashes to prevent it. That is, until Slughorn's private stores had been spelled shut.

She hissed in sudden pain, as though struck, and all thoughts of Potter and Black were burned from her mind. Oh God, she closed her eyes and arched her back away from the cotton shirt which now felt like sandpaper against her skin. She unseeingly replaced the book she had been holding and made headed quickly to her room, trying not to crumple in pain on the stairs. She managed it to the top and slammed her bedroom door, determined not to hear another of Potter's snide remarks.

Lily couldn't risk looking at her back. What if a teacher arrived, looking for her? Even worse, what if Potter walked in? It was just the sort of thing he would do, too, barging in to her bedroom without knocking.

Lily needed to change for bed. She found a large green shirt with long sleeves and a pair of men's boxers and put them on. She then started to look for a special pair of earrings in her trunk; they were special because Lily had bewitched them to play music that only she could hear, like Muggle headphones. Lily found the pair of music note shaped earrings and put them on. She tapped each one with her wand and whispered, "Teenage Kicks, Undertones."

She then carefully crawled onto her bed, lying on her stomach, and turned her head to the side. She concentrated on the music as a means to block out the infinite pain. The blaring melody wasn't enough though, nothing could block out the thoughts of her family and her fear of that house.

Every wall, every floor, every door, and every stair held terrible memories for Lily. She had always planned to write an autobiography, the bruises on her body told the story already, and she would merely translate them into words.

An hour later Lily curled up into a ball and quietly cried herself to sleep, still listening to the same song...

"Are teenage dreams so hard to beat
Every time she walks down the street
Another girl in the neighbourhood
Wish she was mine, she looks so good

I wanna hold you wanna hold you tight
Get teenage kicks right through the night"