Seamus is Seamus and You are Yourself

SEAMUS IS SEAMUS AND YOU ARE YOURSELF 12:

DRACO.

I woke up the morning after Harry and I had um... had our little talk, and immediately knew that something was terribly, terribly wrong.

My- my insides felt weird. Everything looked different. There was something wrong with my FACE! It was... it was RELAXED!!

Then, all at once, I realised what was up.

I was... well and truly happy.

Now, I've certainly read about this occurrence. It had just never happened to me before. I felt like I wanted to... to get up and dance around the dorms, singing 'Wake up It's a Beautiful Morning.' And laugh. And... frolic. Oh, and snog Harry, of course.

I also wanted to giggle. It suddenly occurred to me that I actually liked being happy.

Bloody HELL!

Now, you would think that my fellow housemates would have liked the new me, wouldn't you? Perhaps they might have been pleased that I was cheerful?

Apparently not.

"Woah!" shouted Blaise when he saw me, drawing back sharply as if I had some life-threatening and extremely contagious disease. "What the fuck happened to your face?!"

I didn't deign to answer him.

When I went down to the common room to go to breakfast and said a jovial "good morning!" to four pale-faced first-years, they all shrieked and ran away.

I mean, for Christ's sake! Am I not allowed to be nice once in a while?

"Draco!" Millicent shouted at me at lunchtime, "stop acting like this! You're scaring the goddam children!"

"What did I do now?" I grumbled. Honestly, Bulstrode was always saying I was scaring the stupid first years. I never scare them! I admit, of course, that I terrify them out of their tiny, useless little minds. And that's just the ones from my house... heh heh heh. It's so fun. No-one but me can see that terrifying them is a very skilled art form.

"Reynolds was in my dorm, too frightened to leave! He said- he said-" here Millicent gets a look of utter disgust on her face- "that you were being... civil to him. That- that's not true, is it Draco?"

I was just about to answer her when Harry entered the room. Ooh! I hadn't seen him for over two hours! He caught my eye briefly and I felt... utterly happy once again. Sigh!

Then Millicent said in an extremely freaked-out tone of voice, "Draco... what's happened to your face?! You're not... actually smiling... no, grinning, are you?"

Apparently I'm not allowed to do anything!

"So what if I am?" I murmured back. I never murmur, either. I have two tones of voice. Cold-and-Utterly-in-Control voice, and Sneeringly-Sarcastic voice. This was neither.

Millicent pushed her chair back from me, a look of pure, unadulterated fear on her face. "Stop it!" she whimpered. "You- you're being weird!"

I mean, honestly. Sometimes I really feel like using all the carefully-stoppered poisons I've made for all my classmates.

Not today, however. Because... I was so HAPPY!!

But then something happened.

That dorm mate of Harry's... Thomas, was it?- had tapped Harry on the shoulder, and was now talking to him. Harry... was bending his head towards Thomas's, listening carefully and nodding his head.

Now, I thought I was pretty pissed off and out of control when I wasn't with Harry. Now that I was... it was a hundred, million times worse. Thomas's hand was on Harry's arm. MY Harry's arm!! Only I'M allowed to bloody touch him!!

Get. The. Fuck. Off. Him. NOW!!

I found myself wanting to launch myself at the pair, uttering a full battle cry. And I had been saving it for a much better occasion!

Luckily I restrained myself by savagely attacking the table with my knife instead. The others around me relaxed. This was more like the Draco Malfoy they all knew and... well, knew.

HARRY.

When I came into the Great Hall at lunch and saw Draco, I almost did a double-take.

He was actually... actually smiling. Woah!

No, it wasn't a *smile,* precisely. More of a grin.

Now, I thought that Draco had that Dark-and-Smouldering-Heathcliff-look down to a tee. From the perfectly arched eyebrow to the long, sweeping dark cloaks. Very sexy.

But now he had a bright and extremely goofy grin on his face. It even reached his eyes! You could see that all the other Slytherins were getting completely freaked out by this. Bulstrode was cautiously pushing her chair away from him as if he was a dangerous animal, which she was too scared to take her eyes off of.

He looked... so sweet!

Now, I know that the word 'sweet' is definitely not too common when talking about Draco Malfoy. It's pretty much down at the bottom of the list there along with 'kind to animals and children.' But you should have seen him! Aww!

I was just about to contemplate why Draco was smiling in such a manner when Dean tapped me on the shoulder.

"Harry," he said, "I really need to ask you a huge favour."

I looked at him expectantly.

"Well, you know how I've taken Magical Art and Painting this year?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Well... we've got onto the er... model part of the course," Dean continued.

Uh oh. I felt an impending sense of doom.

"And I need to make a quite extensive series of paintings and sketches of a human subject... and I was wondering... could you do it?"

"What?!" I spluttered. "Why me?!" Dean gave me a pointed look. "Oh... right," I muttered sheepishly.

"Oh, go on Harry!" Dean pleaded. "I'm not trying to come on to you, honestly. You'd just be so good to draw. I really want to do well!"

Sigh. I just don't know how I get into these things. Really I don't!

DRACO.

I met Harry that evening after dinner.

I was actually nervous. I changed my outfit about a hundred times. I spent at least ten more minutes than usual doing my hair. So it took a full hour this time.

I felt bloody breathless! It was completely and utterly ridiculous. How could I feel this... giddy about something that doesn't involve illegal curses and fluffy little bunny rabbits? It didn't make any SENSE!

And I was actually early. I've never been early for anything. I extend my father the courtesy of being on time for him, but nobody else. Because I'm always in control.

Not this time, however. Though he might not know it, Harry held all the cards. Not to mention me. And in more ways than one, thank goodness.

I was just glancing at my watch and realising that Harry was now exactly thirty-three seconds late, when there was a scuffling sound and there was Harry, framed in the doorway and looking as gorgeous as ever.

Sigh!

He looked about as nervous as I was, as well as blushing in the shyest manner possible.

"Hi," he said quietly, with half a grin on his face.

It was so... awkward. But also so awkwardly sweet and perfect. It was sort of freaking me out, actually. All my other lovers (well, I can't really call Harry that yet... so I suppose- my boyfriend?! Oh God- am I in a relationship?! I- I do believe that I am. Argh!!) and I would never, ever meet up and then stand there just smiling at each other. We would instead be ripping our clothes off. This, however, was utterly and completely different.

And, if I was soppy at all, I would say... much, MUCH better.

Luckily I'm not soppy, and therefore I never said that. I never even thought it. Nope. Not at all.

I approached Harry slowly and tentatively wrapped my arms around him, and he leaned comfortably into me.

It was very nice after that. Alright- bloody fantastic. There, you bloody happy now?

The only bad point of the entire evening was when I asked Harry if he could meet me tomorrow.

He frowned. "I can't," he said. "I've promised to do something."

"What??" I asked before I could stop myself. I must have looked like such a fool. But at least I'm a gorgeous fool; that's all I can say.

Harry blushes, looks down and scrapes the floor with his shoe. Again, I found this sickeningly sweet, and not at all worthy of a withering glare as I would have performed if anybody else had done it. It was also very Harry, and I added it to my list of the best Harryish moments ever.

"Well- I sort of told Dean I would sit for him- he's doing that Magical Art class this year." Harry looked highly embarrassed.

I was seriously pissed off. Wild images flew through my mind of a naked Harry draped over a couch whilst Thomas, wearing a beret, drew at an easel and looked at him lecherously whilst waggling his eyebrows up and down.

"Just exactly what kind of pictures does Thomas want to do?" I growled.

Harry stared at me for a minute, perplexed. "Well, I'm not really sure-" then he broke off, staring at me.

"Oh, Draco- you're not jealous or anything, are you?" he asked.

"Jealous?" I spat. "Jealous?! Why would I be?! Don't be so ridiculous!"

"Erm- well, your eye's twitching again. Like last time. That was my first clue."

"Well, I-"

"Also, your hands are balled up in fists, and you're scowling. It sort of gave it away..."

WHY does Harry just have notice the things that I don't want him to know?!

"Shut up, Potter," I snap. Now, this would normally completely piss Harry off. But this time he just grins and leans into me.

"It's sweet," he says smilingly.

Oh god. Harry Potter thinks that I, Draco Malfoy, am sweet. And to top it off I, Draco Malfoy, don't even mind that he thinks this.

What the fuck is going on?!

Well, that question is quite an easy one to answer. It's just that I don't want to. Alright. Just for you, I'll give it a go.

I am in--

Right. I'll give it another go. I am in l--

In lo--

Gargh! It's not working! I just can't say it. I can't! Not to you, and certainly not to HIM!

So let me put it another way.

There ain't no sunshine when he's gone. Or rather, there isn't any sunshine whilst he's not there.

Because I, at least, can use proper grammar, thank-you very much. I may be a lot of things, but I'm certainly not common.

I am a Malfoy, after all.

***