Rating:
PG-13
House:
Riddikulus
Ships:
Lucius Malfoy/Narcissa Malfoy
Characters:
Bellatrix Lestrange Draco Malfoy Lucius Malfoy Narcissa Malfoy
Genres:
Humor Romance
Era:
Unspecified Era
Spoilers:
J.K. Rowling Interviews or Website
Stats:
Published: 08/25/2006
Updated: 08/25/2006
Words: 864
Chapters: 1
Hits: 632

Sailing Ships: Icicle

Antigonistic

Story Summary:
Part of my Sailing Ships Challenge. Lucius and Narcissa are in the delivery room. Lucius' hand will never be the same. And Bellatrix Just. Won't. Stop. Giggling. LuciusNarcissa

Chapter 01 - Sailing Ships: Icicle

Chapter Summary:
Lucius and Narcissa are in the delivery room. Lucius' hand will never be the same. And Bellatrix Just. Won't. Stop. Giggling. LuciusNarcissa
Posted:
08/25/2006
Hits:
632
Author's Note:
I wrote this for Sam, because she asked for something 'not weird', and for Lex, because she's my best fwend.


"Lucius Coluber Generosus Malfoy, if you ever come near me again, I swear I will disembowel you with a pickle fork!"

The named individual winced and paled until he was almost translucent as he heard the words of his new wife, the former Narcissa Black. Lucius Malfoy was a lot of things, but stupid wasn't one of them. The way Narcissa's sister Bellatrix was snickering in the corner of the room wasn't exactly calming, but he did his best to sooth the love of his life (though at the moment, he was almost certain she did not feel the same way about him).

"Alright, Cissa, just breathe and squeeze my hand, after all, it's not as if I'll ever need it again." This last was muttered under his breath.

"I HEARD THAT!"

"Of course you did, of course you did, because you're perfect in every way and I'm incredibly lucky to have you in my life," Lucius replied hastily.

"Oh, you just don't want her to cut you off again."

"Bellatrix. You're. Not. Helping," Lucius growled out between gritted teeth as he glared at the smirking b- witch at the foot of the bed.

"I know, Lucy, but it's just hilarious to hear the squeals you make as she-"

"Ow!"

"-breaks another bone in your hand," Bellatrix finished, eyes glittering in amusement while Lucius tried to refrain from murdering his wife's favorite sister. After all, it would not be proper decorum to be sent to Azkaban while his wife was still in labor.

"Lucius! If you would please refrain from bantering with my sister, I could use your help over here!" Narcissa screamed, interrupting the staring contest going on between the two purebloods that weren't in labor. "Get your arse over here and give me your hand!"

"Coming, Cissy!" Lucius hurried back over to Narcissa's side, as he had gotten up and walked over to Bellatrix as he contemplated various gruesome ways to slaughter her.

"It's crowning, it's crowning!" the very expensive healer they had hired announced as Narcissa once again squeezed Lucius' hand into an indeterminable shape, and Bellatrix once again giggled at his misfortune.

"Well, get it out of me!" Narcissa screeched, "For Merlin's sake, get it out of me!"

"It's coming, it's getting there, just keep pushing!" the healer coaxed, and both Lucius and Narcissa breathed sighs of relief as in unison Narcissa stopped having to push and Lucius got use of his hand back.... even if it was numb.

"Oh, Luce, isn't he gorgeous?" Narcissa cooed as she finally got a good look at the baby.

"He's a handsome one, alright," Lucius stated proudly, looking closely at his new son. "I think he has your nose."

"Yes, but he has your eyes, and your hair, and your chin," Narcissa replied after taking a look at the little boy's grey eyes and the small tufts of light blond hair on his head.

"He'll make an excellent servant for the Dark Lord," Bellatrix finally spoke up. "It's in his blood."

"Well, yes, of course," Narcissa replied a bit anxiously, "but that won't be for quite a while, now will it?" she went on before Bellatrix could reply, "Anyway, Lucius and I have discussed this, and we'd like for you to be godmother, Bella."

"Me?" Bella asked, surprised and successfully distracted from the previous subject. "Why me?"

"Well, who else would we ask? That Muggle - loving sister of ours, Andromeda?" Narcissa said back reasonably.

"I suppose you have a point. Oooooh, I'm going to have so much fun with him. I'll teach him all the best curses... Wait, who's godfather?" Bellatrix suddenly asked, curious.

"Well, since I got to pick you as godmother, Lucius picked Severus as godfather."

"Severus Snape? Wonderful choice, he's one of Master's favorites..." Bella trailed off with a pleased gleam in her eye.

"Well, it was in between Severus and Roddy, but we figured Roddy's already godfather to the Parkinsons' little girl, so..."

"Oh, yes, of course, I mean it's only fair," Bella hastened to reply. "I'm sure Rodolphus will understand as well, but Snape is a fabulous catch. I assume you've informed him already?" Bella waited for Lucius' nod before continuing, "Have you chosen a name?"

"Well, we had them picked out for both options; a girl or a boy, so let me be the first to introduce you to Draconis Acumen Tyrannus Malfoy. We'll call him Draco," Narcissa explained.

"Dragon... Cunning... Lord..." Bella murmured, "I like it," she proclaimed after rolling it about in her head. "It's a good strong Slytherin name. Our Lord will be pleased."

"Well, I'm pleased, so let's see when Cissa can get out of here and we can go back to the manor," Lucius said with a sneer at the healer in training that came scuttling in. He grimaced as he tried to support himself up with his bad hand.

"Oh, Luce, is there something wrong with your hand?" Narcissa asked innocently.

Bellatrix burst into hysterical laughter. The healer ran back out of the room. Narcissa looked a bit confused, but if you looked closely you could see the small mischievous twinkle lurking in her eyes.

Lucius just scowled at everyone.


The translation of Lucy’s name, in case you were wondering! Coluber: serpent, snake Generosus: of noble birth At least that’s what the translator said! I figured it sounded Lucius – like!