Frozen

You only see what your eyes want to see
how can life be what you want it to be

It'd happened two and a half years ago and he still hadn't let go. We'd already been married for quite some time and I have moved on since then. He still hasn't let go. It's o.k. To grieve, it's natural to mourn, but it's gone too far. Too long.

During the war with Voldemort nearly three years ago Draco had defied his father and fought against the dark forces. I was so very proud of him. He had withdrawn from the inner circle of death eaters he was in long ago, but this was the official step. He was no longer in any way associated with the Dark Lord or his father.

Draco was with Ron, and they faced the Dark Lord themselves. He went to kill Ron and Draco didn't stop him. He blames himself now, for Ron's death. I'm glad he wasn't killed, because without him I wouldn't be happy. He's my husband; I love him so very much. I don't blame him, even though many will miss Ronald Weasley.

You're frozen
When your heart's not open

You're so consumed with how much you get
you waste your time with hate and regret

Draco has let life slip away from him. He sits and broods, mourns, blames, and wallows in his pain. He had problems even before the war, but this has only heightened the situation. He hasn't talked to me in ages. He doesn't work. He rarely leaves the house. He needs to live.

You're broken
when your heart's not open

Mmmmmm, if I could melt your heart
Mmmmmm, we'd never be apart

I love Draco so much. I sometimes doubt if the feeling is mutual. We married out of fear of our parents if we didn't. He'd said he loves me, we'd had some wonderful times together, but it just seems like his heart has completely turned to ice. The war has done so much more damage to his spirit. If I could just break through to him, we'd be so wonderful together.

Mmmmmm, give yourself to me
Mmmmmm, you hold the key

But unfortunately I can't do that without Draco wanting that for himself as well. He has to give in and let go.

Now there's no point in placing the blame
and you should know I suffer the same

He blames himself so much for Ron's death. I've told him time and time again, it could've been anybody, he's only human. Not many people would willingly sacrifice themselves for someone they don't know that well. Ron and Draco were never close, everyone knew that. Some people accused Draco of secretly being a spy for Voldemort and trapping Ron - but that's not true. Dumbledore cleared his name. It doesn't matter to Draco, he still drowns in guilt.

If I lose you
my heart will be broken

I believe people can die of a broken heart. Draco's heart has been broken by the guilt and blame he feels over Ron's death. I think if he continues in the way he's been living, he will die. Draco rarely eats, he rarely sleeps, and he's had the same mild head cold since he came home from the war. He's been so consumed his body can't fight the infection. I've tried so much to help him I wonder why I still attempt to communicate, when all I get in return are mere nods of his head. Draco is lost, and imprisoned in himself.

Love is a bird, she needs to fly
Let all the hurt inside of you die

My love for Draco is like a caged bird. If he'd just let go it could fly so beautifully. I do love him, so much. I have for as long as I can remember. I thought he was attractive in first year, then it progressed to a crush, to a longing to know him better, and somehow I ended up loving every part of Draco. His every flaw and imperfection. Sometimes I feel like he needs me. And I need him.

You're frozen
when your heart's not open

if I could melt your heart.