A Moment in Passing

A Moment in Passing

Remus J. Lupin was a man torn. His best friend was gone, again. He was alone, again. At least this time he had the Order; it was something to fill in some of the long, agonizing hours of his life.

Remus had been assigned to set the wards and charms around the Order's new headquarters. Since no one was certain what Kreacher had revealed to the Malfoy's, Number 12 Grimmauld Place was no longer safe. Not that anyone wanted to be there anyway, there were too many reminders of Sirius.

The Weasley's arrived next with Hermione. While they always tried to portray a carefree attitude, they were one of the main targets of Voldemort and his Death Eaters. This year, Hermione's parents had been placed under the Fidelius Charm as well.

It was Harry's sixth year at Hogwarts, and from what Ron, Hermione and Ginny had said, he hadn't responded to one of their owls or posts all summer. Remus knew only too well how Harry was feeling.

After the incident at the Department of Mysteries, Dumbledore had decided that certain members of the DA (namely Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Neville) should be kept informed of the activities of the Order, against the wishes of Molly Weasley and Minerva McGonagall.

"It's not an arguable point I'm afraid," Dumbledore stated firmly.

"Well, at least not my Ginny!" Molly contended. "She's just a child."

Ginny rolled her eyes in disgust. She was fifteen and felt she had proven herself capable at the Department of Mysteries. She had valiantly fought along side other Order members, even after she had broken her ankle.

"She's hardly a child, Molly," Remus' voice broke in gently. "I was there, I saw her fight. She fought brilliantly and I was proud to fight side-by-side with her."

Coming from the best Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher they ever had, Ginny felt that was quite a compliment. "Thank you," she mouthed to him from behind her mother.

"I will NOT have my baby subjected to any of this," Molly stated firmly.

"Subjected to it?" Ginny finally spoke, her true Weasley temper beginning to flare. "I'm so glad that everyone seems to forget about my first year!"

"Don't take that tone with me, young lady!" Molly scolded sternly.

"I'm sorry Mum, but no one ever brings up the Chamber of Secrets," Ginny began her rant. "Never! It's like it never happened. Well, it did. It did happen! And I was the one responsible for all of it! Me! Little Ginny Weasley! Poor little Ginny Weasley. Can't play with her brothers brooms, can't play Quidditch with them, she might get hurt. If it were up to you I'd be sitting on a shelf like a porcelain doll! I fought Tom Riddle then, and I fought his Death Eaters just a few months ago, and you all act like I'm incompetent and incapable!"

Every eye stared after her as she stormed out of the house. Ron, Fred and George all stood there gaping at their little sister, and a single tear streaked down Hermione's cheek. She had heard Ginny's cries in the middle of the night, but never uttered a word about them to anyone.

Arthur placed a hand on his wife's shoulder when she made motion to go after her. "Let her be for now," he said calmly, only to receive a scathing, hurt look from his wife. He was usually a quiet, jovial man, but when he set his mind to something like this, there was to be no further argument.

No one noticed Remus slip out to follow her.

He followed her to the stream that ran through the property. She sat on the muddy bank and cried in utter frustration.

"It wasn't your fault," Remus said quietly as he stood leaned up against a tree several meters back.

"What?" she asked, eyeing him carefully.

"What happened your first year," he continued, looking at her through hooded eyes. "That wasn't your fault. You need to let go of that guilt before it tears you up completely."

She had grown into a beautiful young lady, but as rough and tumble as any of her brothers. Her fiery red hair was pulled into a ponytail that still reached her mid-back. Her eyes, the color of melted milk chocolate, wanted to hold the innocence everyone thought she held, but too much dark knowledge was stored there. She didn't seem to let the incident in the Chamber consume her life, but unlike every one else who had seemed to forget, she never could.

She shook her head in resignation. "What does it really matter?" she whispered. "It was my fault. I wrote in the diary, I did those things. Whether or not I was in control at the time, I still did them. Hermione, Colin, Penelope, Justin, they all could have been killed. I put Harry and Ron's life in danger. It's my fault alright."

"You were eleven," he replied softly as he sat on the ground next to her. "Everyone else should have seen it. Harry and Ron, Hermione, McGonagall and Dumbledore, even Fred, George and Percy are all just as much to blame as you are. They should have seen what was going on with you, but they weren't paying attention. No one was paying attention."

"That's very kind of you, Professor..."

"Remus," he reminded. "Please call me Remus."

"Remus," she smiled. "But I don't mind taking responsibility for it. I shouldn't have continued to write in that diary. Especially after I realized I was having periods of time that I didn't remember. I just wish that everyone didn't act like it never happened, like I'm something so fragile and innocent."

"Why did you write in that diary, Ginny?" It was an honest question.

"Because it listened to me," she whispered. "Tom listened to me. He didn't think I was childish; at least he didn't act that way. I thought he really cared."

"Because you felt no one else listened? No one else cared?" he asked.

"I guess I see your point," she sighed, resting her head on her bent knees.

"And they still don't listen," he whispered more to himself than to her. He remembered. He knew first hand what it was like to have a dark secret; one you didn't dare tell a soul. No one dared asked, either. To this day the only person he had ever told about the day he had been bitten by the werewolf was Sirius, and now he was gone.

"Do people ever ask you?" she asked gently, as if reading his thoughts.

"Ask me what, Ginny?" he smiled, although not sincerely.

"About being a werewolf? About how it happened?"

"No," he answered truthfully. "It's not brought up that often."

It was in that moment that the truth dawned on her. Remus Lupin was not unlike her. He understood her innermost torment better than anyone ever could. "Have you ever told anyone?" she asked, more sympathetically than before. She now truly felt for the man seated next to her. Although she didn't turn into a dark creature once a month, she had been touched by something vile and twice as evil. It was a rather odd bond they shared, but a bond all the same.

"Sirius," he said simply, his blue-grey eyes firmly affixed on the rushing water of the stream.

"How old were you?" she continued.

Through a series of innocently asked questions, Ginny Weasley managed to expunge almost the entire life story of Remus J. Lupin. The sun was beginning to set when he finished telling her about being in Germany before returning to Hogwarts to become a Professor.

"I really liked teaching," he said sorrowfully.

"Well, I know I can speak for most of Gryffindor house when I say we'd love to have you back," she laughed.

"That is very kind, Ginny, but I'm afraid that most of the parents would not agree."

"I'm sorry," she finally whispered.

"For what?"

"For everything, Remus." A single tear slid down her cheek although she smiled warmly. "For the life you were forced into living, for your losses, but mostly for Sirius. I know his loss hurts most of all right now."

He reached out and placed his arm around her shoulders, pulling her nearer to him. She rested her head on his shoulder as they both transfixed their gaze on the moving waters before them. They both took comfort in the knowledge that someone, at least, understood.

Neither felt quite so alone in the world....