Could It Be Any Harder?

Could It Be Any Harder?

     Draco sat in the front pew, watching, waiting. How terrible it all was. A single tear slid down his face, and he made no effort to stop it, or even to wipe it away.

~You left me with goodbye and open arms

A cut so deep I don't deserve ~

     It was over. He was gone, buried, and Draco was expected just to carry on. Just like that. He hadn't thought this would happen, and the worse thing was - it was his fault. Oh, everybody reassured him, told him no one could have prevented it, but they were wrong.

~You were always invincible in my eyes

The only thing against us now is time~

     Dead. He was dead! Never would Draco see him again, the only place he still existed was in memories. And boy, did he have plenty of those. The tears were streaming down Draco's face now. The church was empty, everyone had already gone.

~Could it be any harder?

To say goodbye, and without you

could it be any harder?

To watch you go, to face what's true

If I only had one more day~

     Draco rose, and walked outside. He walked, and walked till he was standing in some sort of park. He lay down, and closed his eyes. He couldn't stop it; the memory of their first kiss came back to him like a bomb. Opening his eyes, Draco gazed up at the sky, searching for some sign, something, anything, to tell him it would be all right.

I lie down and blind myself with laughter

Well, a quick of hope is what I need

And how I could wish that I could turn back the hours

But I know I just don't have the power~

     Draco had been standing there, ready to jump, when Harry, his hero - and that's what he was, a hero - had come, and persuaded him down off the window edge, and had made everything better. Just like he always did. Of course, it had been difficult at first, when they had started their relationship. No one had seemed to want to know them anymore, but the two had stuck it out together, and eventually, people had either come to accept or ignore their relationship.

~Could it be any harder?

To say goodbye, and without you

Could it be any harder,

To watch you go, to face what's true

If I only had one more day~

     Sitting up, Draco rocked himself, his hands over his eyes, trying to numb the pain. The last scene was playing in his mind.

He could see Harry, brave and strong as ever, pointing his wand at Voldemort. Draco heard the curse in his mind, saw Voldemort, weak already by the numerous spells thrown towards him, fall back, defeated. Then, he saw his own father, his enemy, point his wand at Harry, and he saw him die. Draco saw him die again.

~Well, I'd jump at the chance,

We'd drink and we'd dance,

I'd listen close to your every word,

As if it's your last, well I know it's your last

'Cause today, oh, you're gone~

     Draco stood up, shaking once more, and walked back to the flat. His flat - it wasn't theirs anymore, it was his. How could he do it? How could he live without him? Pouring himself a drink, Draco sat down, staring vacantly out of the window.

~Could it be any harder?

Could it be any harder?

Could it be any harder,

To live my life without you?

Could it be any harder

I'm all alone, I'm all alone~

     What was he supposed to do, put on a smile and forget him? Draco laughed hollowly. Nobody ever forgot Harry, for fuck's sake, he was The Boy Who Lived. Only he hadn't... He wasn't, anymore, he had been struck down, and for what? For destroying the most feared wizard ever? What a crime.

~Like sand on my feet

The smell of sweet perfume

You stick to me forever, baby

And I wish you didn't go

I wish you didn't go

I wish you didn't go away~

     It was so unfair, though Draco bitterly. Why couldn't he have killed me? I'm the one he hates; I'm the one who turned against him, who joined the good side, why couldn't it have been me?

~To touch you again

With life in your hands

It couldn't be any harder~

Draco stood up, and, aiming his wand at his hard, muttered two words: Avada Kedavra. Now he could be with Harry forever.