Safe At Home

Chapter 3

The next day was nothing out of the ordinary. The Marauders & Co ate breakfast at the usual time, went to lessons, played a quick prank, ate lunch, went to lessons, did or grumbled over homework, ate dinner, did homework, talked about pranks and went to bed.

If only they had known.

If only they had known that would be the last ordinary day they would have in a long time.

If only they had enjoyed it more.

But they didn't.

They day started off normally. The Marauders and Gus woke, exchanged playful banter, and went down to breakfast. Then the mail arrived.

"What's that?" James asked, pointing to an owl.

Gus went pale. "It's a black envelope."

Three quarters of the Hall waited with baited breath. There hadn't been a black envelope since last year, and now... When it was apparent that the owl was headed for the Gryffindor table, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff sighed in relief, but the Gryffindors were more nervous.

A black envelope was always from the Ministry, to inform someone that a person in their immediate family had been killed in a Death Eater attack. Sirius was afraid, not for himself, but for his friends. He truly didn't care if his parents were dead.

The owl swooped across the table, closer to the Marauders. Not us, Sirius prayed, Please, not us.

The deities weren't listening. The owl dropped the ominous black envelope in front of...Remus. He opened it with shaking hands, read it, and burst into tears. Then he ran out of the Hall.

James and Sirius exchanged a glance. They both reached for the letter, but James let Sirius pick it up. "'Dear Mr. Lupin,

We regret to say that your parents have been the object of attacks by He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. We are sorry for your loss.

Ministry of Magic'"

Another owl landed by Remus' plate. James picked up the letter and said, "Come on Sirius, let's go find him."

After they had left the Hall, James asked, "Is your sense of smell good?"

Sirius nodded wordlessly. "This way," he said, leading the way to the boys toilets.

The two boys walked in and heard the sound of someone throwing up and sobbing. After a few minutes, the toilet flushed and Remus stepped out shakily. He slid down to the floor by the sinks and sobbed into his arms.

Sirius and James exchanged another look and instantly crouched down beside Remus. They both patted his shoulders, unsure of what to do or say.

Finally James broke the silence. "I'm really sorry Remus."

"Me too," Sirius added.

Remus nodded through his sobs.

Sirius then said, "You got another letter. It looks important."

"R-read i-it a-aloud," Remus sobbed.

James opened the letter and read, "'Dear Remus,

Your parents' funeral will be next Saturday. On Sunday, their Will will be read. Since you are not of age, you will stay at Hogwarts until the summer except to attend the funeral and hear the Will be read. At this time, you will stay with me. When summer comes, you will be on your own.

Sincerely, Uncle Ar--' I can't pronounce that name."

"'Arius,'" Sirius said.

Remus shuddered, and continued to sob.

Suddenly the bathroom door opened. Dumbledore walked in. "Remus, I am truly sorry about your parents. Did you get a letter from your Uncle Arius?"

Remus, still sobbing, nodded.

"Good. Remus, you are of course excused from classes, as are you Mr....Black." Dumbledore took Sirius aside and said quietly, "Try to prevent him from sinking into depression."

Sirius nodded,

Dumbledore left, after briefly touching Remus' shoulder. James followed, so he wouldn't be late for class.

Remus nodded and got up and followed Sirius to the Tower.

"Why aren't you in class?" the Fat Lady inquired.

"Bugger off!" Sirius said angrily.

"That's not the password, Mr. Black," she said.

"Bugger off!" Sirius repeated, but did then give the correct password.

He and Remus went up to the dormitory, where Remus flung himself onto his bed and sobbed into his pillow for nearly an hour, Sirius rubbing his shoulder the whole time.

When Remus had run out of tears and was just sniffling occasionally, his face still buried in his pillow, Sirius spoke.

"I know it must be hard," he said. "I really am sorry Remie. I know how much you loved them."

Remus sat up and then spoke, his voice hoarse from crying. "It is hard Sirius. It's strange, you know? One day they're there, the next they aren't." He was silent for a minute, then continued, "You never really expect people to die, until it happens. You think loved ones will live forever, when you're younger at least. I never thought--" his voice broke, then he continued, "I never thought Voldemort would kill my parents. There wasn't really a reason. They weren't powerful, they weren't special, or anything. I guess Voldemort just felt like it. Most of his attacks are for no reason whatsoever."

Sirius sighed and embraced his friend. "I--I guess that's just how it goes sometimes. I wish I knew what to say to help you Remie, but I don't."

"That's all right Siri. You're helping just by being here," Remus said, pain in every part of his voice as he lay back down.

Sirius resumed rubbing Remus' shoulder. After awhile, Remus fell asleep.

~ ~

When it was nearly dinnertime, Remus woke. "What time is it?" he asked Sirius, who was still sitting beside him.

"Almost time for dinner," Sirius replied. "Do you feel like eating?"

Remus shook his head. "Not really. I know I should, but...the thought of food makes me want to gag."

Sirius sighed. "That's understandable."

At that moment, Gus and Peter walked into the dormitory. When they saw Remus was awake, the immediately said they were sorry to hear about his parents.

Remus nodded. "Thanks," he said quietly.

"Sirius, are you coming to dinner? You haven't eaten all day," Peter asked.

Sirius fixed Peter with such a fierce glare, the saying 'if looks could kill' seemed to be true. Peter squeaked, rather like his Animagi counterpart and scurried out of the room. Gus, noticing Sirius' look, hightailed it out of there too.

"Sirius, you haven't eaten all day?" Remus asked, concerned. "You didn't have to stay with me."

"Yes, I did Remus. I--I've seen what happens sometimes, after someone loses someone," Sirius said, shuddering.

Remus frowned but didn't press the matter, mostly because he was too caught up in grief.

The week went by slowly. Remus rarely spoke, rarely ate, rarely slept, rarely did anything at all. Saturday came as a relief to the Marauders & Co, mainly because Remus would be able to get his grief out, and hopefully return back to normal.

On Monday Remus returned, looking better than he had when he'd left. He went to classes, ate all his meals, and talked to anyone who spoke to him. To many, it looked as if he was over his parents' deaths.

The Marauders knew better. They heard him crying in his sleep sometimes, saw the vacant look his eyes occasionally got. But they also knew he was coping.

In the beginning of February, Remus mentioned what had been in his parents' Will.

"I thought it odd really, that they had a Will, but my Uncle Arius explained that all adults in the wizarding world had written one up because of the Dark times. My parents left the house and anything in it and half of their Gringotts account to me. The rest went to my Uncle Arius, and some other uncle I've never heard of," Remus told them.

James looked thoughtful. "My Mum mentioned that I think."

"What, Remus' uncle he's never heard of?" Peter asked. He really was that dumb.

Sirius rolled his eyes, exasperated. "No, you prat, the thing about all the adults in the wizarding world making up a Will...right?"

James nodded. "Yeah, that."

Suddenly in the middle of their discussion, Annie and Lily burst into their dormitory. Lily was crying, but Annie was sobbing, hard.

"Annie? What's the matter?" James asked, jumping to his feet and running to his girlfriend, though Sirius could've sworn he was looking at Lily when he said it.

"I--I have terrible news!" Annie burst out.

The others looked at her, gaping.

Annie sobbed out, "I...I...I'm moving!"

"Well, that's not so bad," Peter reasoned.

"Yes, it is!" Annie yelled.

Sirius frowned. She's moving. Big deal. Many things are worse. Remus' parents dying for example. My...situation, for another example. "Why is it so bad?" he asked.

Annie sniffled. "Because, I'm moving to--to...I'm moving back to Texas! I won't be going to Hogwarts anymore!"

Lily wiped at her tears. "Isn't it awful?"

Remus' voice was cold. "No, it's not. Not in these times. In fact, it's wonderful. It's safer in America. Here, many worse things can happen."

"You unfeeling son of a bitch!" Annie yelled angrily.

"I'm not unfeeling Andromeda Starr, you are!" Remus retorted. "You scared us all, because in these Dark times, moving isn't so bad. People dying is bad! Abuse is bad! Moving is not fucking bad!"

James scowled. "Remus, Annie didn't mean to make you feel your parents are unimportant."

"Maybe not James, but it felt like it. And you'd always stick up for your girlfriend!" This came from Sirius.

"You bastard!" James yelled. "She is my girlfriend! Just like Lily is yours! Wouldn't you do the same thing I'm doing?"

Sirius shook with fury. "No James, I wouldn't. Not in this situation. I'd yell at Lily, just like Remus did to Annie, if she came in sobbing, 'Oh I'm moving, boo hoo!'"

Annie slapped Sirius across the face, before kicking him in the groin.

Sirius dropped to his knees and doubled up. "Ouch...you...bitch!"

"That was totally uncalled for Andromeda!" Remus yelled.

"Well, you didn't have to be so unfeeling!" Annie shot back.

"And Sirius didn't have to call her a bitch!" Lily added.

Sirius gasped from the floor, "Lily...she...didn't have to...kick me...in the groin. Do you...have any idea...how much that hurts?"

James glared. "You deserved it!"

"Well, I admit he could have been nicer, but you could have damaged him permanently!" Remus yelled. "I'm glad you're moving if you act like this!"

Unseen by anyone, Peter slipped out of the room.

Sirius got shakily to his feet, clenching his teeth from the pain. He could bear it, worse had been done, but...OUCH.

Annie glared, then said slowly and purposely, "Well, it's no big deal that Remus' parents died. They're just two of hundreds. And your parents abuse you Sirius? So what? I'm sure it's nothing worse than what I've just done."

Remus' eyes filled with tears. "Bitch!" he yelled, and ran out of the room.

"Ooh, the crybaby. Are you going to cwy, Siwius?"

Sirius shook with rage. "Andromeda Starr, don't you dare make...my life sound easy. I'd love to see you try it. In fact, I'd love to...see you go through half of what I've gone through and ...live. You bitch!" And he stormed away too, to find Remus.

Lily hesitated, then said, "I have to agree with Sirius and Remus on this one Annie. You were a little harsh."

"Fine, side with you goddamned boyfriend. That's like you Lily, you...you...mudblood!" Annie said angrily.

Lily turned red with fury, before going to her own dormitory.

James scowled and shook his head. "You really messed up Annie."

"Go ahead, side with your best friends and Lily, not your girlfriend! See if I care!" And Annie slapped James across the face too. He left the room too.

Annie collapsed on the floor, sobbing.

Meanwhile, Sirius had run through the halls. He found Remus easily, and slid inside the room.

Sirius walked over to Remus, who was crying on the floor, but the tears were more angry than sad.

"If she's moving, why did she say all that, and do all that?" Remus asked angrily.

Sirius sighed. "I don't know."

"How dare she? How dare she nearly make fun of my parents death, and you?" Remus asked. "By the way, are you all right?"

Sirius nodded. "I've been through worse."

"But why?" Remus asked again.

"I think I know why," came a new voice. James.

Sirius and Remus both spun around. "Why?!" they half-yelled in unison.

"And don't you dare say, 'Because she's moving,' James. Just because you're on her side--" Sirius began hotly, but James interrupted.

"Wait, wait! I'm not on her side, she had no right to do all that, but I think I know why. It's because she's moving to America--wait, I'm not finished--and she wants us all to hate her so that she won't miss us as much. That's why when Remus was sort of angry, she took it further," James said.

Lily's voice came from the doorway. "Brilliant theory James! Do you think so?"

James nodded. "Yes, I do."

Peter slipped into the room. "You do what?"

James explained his theory again. As Peter was nodding, they heard a voice from the door.

"That's right."

"Annie!" James said.

"Yes, I did want you all to hate me. Because I'm moving in a week, and I didn't want it to be sad," Annie said.

Remus put his arm around Annie. "Hey, Annie, we're not going to stop being friends, we can all write you know."

"Thanks Remus, you're right," Annie said. "But James...I don't think we can go on dating across the Atlantic."

James nodded, eyes downcast. "Yeah, I know."

Annie walked over to James and kissed him. "It's not you James," she reassured him. "And if there was any way it could work--"

"I know," James said quietly. "I know."

Sirius could see James was upset about Annie breaking up with him, even if he wouldn't admit it. He resolved to talk to James later. After all, I'm supposed to be his best friend. And I haven't been acting like it lately. I mean, I've been acting like Remus is my sole friend. And I...I couldn't live without James. I--I don't know what I would do without him.

~ ~

That night, when everyone was asleep, Sirius sat at the foot of James' bed. "James...wake up!" he hissed.

James jerked awake. "Sirius? Wrong bed, Remus is next to me," James snapped.

"James, look, I'm sorry I haven't been acting much like your best friend lately. But James, I can tell you're upset about Annie, even though you act like you don't," Sirius said.

"Ah, guilt trip," James said knowingly and sarcastically.

Sirius scowled. "It is not a damn guilt trip James! If you were upset about me spending so much time with Remus, you should have said something."

"No, it's not that you were spending time with Remus, it was you abandoned me, and Peter and Annie, and Lily too! You just left us Sirius, because Remus needed you more." James' tone softened a little. "And I understand, sort of. I do, really. But right now, I'm just...I am upset Sirius. I love Annie, I really do. But she's right, we can't continue this over the Atlantic."

"You should tell Annie that James. That you love her," Sirius said softly. He was thinking about his own girlfriend. James is right. I do need to spend more time with Lily. With him and Peter too, to be honest.

James smiled. "You're right. And you should too. Tell that to Lily I mean. Annie told me--never mind, I'm not supposed to tell you."

"James, please!" Sirius begged.

"Well...all right. Annie told me that Lily told her she thinks you don't really love her, and that you never did, because you haven't shown it for awhile, or even told her that," James whispered.

Sirius' eyes widened. "But I do James, I do! Lily was...she is one of the rays of comfort that reach me through the mass of pain and misery in the holidays." Then he blushed, because he thought he'd said too much.

"Sirius, you should tell Dumbledore about that," James said gently.

"NO!"

"All right. All right. But do talk to Lily."

Sirius nodded. "And you talk to Annie."

"I will. I will."

Sirius lay awake, thinking of what James had said. He knew he had to talk to Lily, but what would he say? Lily, I love you? Lily, you mean the world to me? Lily, you were a light in the dark? Sirius sighed and continued to think. After a few minutes, he accidentally dropped off.

Sirius woke suddenly. I must thank my subconscious some day. I know what to tell Lily! He checked the clock and saw that it was a suitable time to wake up. Well, that's one thing that's bloody going well.

Sirius leaped out of bed. He quickly got dressed, managing to wake the others in the process. "Sirius!" groaned Gus, "I was hoping to sleep in today."

"Oh, shut up," Sirius said. "James, remember what we agreed to do?"

James groaned, but nodded. He rolled out of bed and began getting dressed. Sirius followed suit. When the two boys were dressed, they ran out of the dormitory and knocked on the door of the girl's dormitory.

A wide-awake Lily opened the door. "Siri, James! What do you want?"

"We want you and Annie," Sirius replied.

Lily frowned, but yelled, "Annie, James wants you!"

Annie, also wide awake, flounced over. "James, I already said we can't--"

"I know, but I have to talk to you," James said.

"And I have to talk to you, Flower," Sirius added. "Astronomy Tower?"

Lily looked apprehensive. "Well...okay."

Sirius took Lily's hand and led her to the Astronomy Tower. "Sit down," he said, pointing to the floor.

Lily sat. Sirius sat beside her. Sirius took a deep breath. "Lily, I love you. You mean the world to me. Through all the darkness, you were a light. We all have our demons, but you chased mine away. I love you so much, when we're apart, I feel like part of me is missing. I can never express my love to you in merely words. Can I kiss you?"

Lily gaped at Sirius. "What...why...of course you can."

Sirius leaned in and their lips met in a sweet kiss. The kiss soon turned into a full out snog fest. They broke apart only when they needed to breathe.

"Sirius!" Lily gasped, "What is this all about?!"

"Lily, I meant what I said. I love you, and when James and Annie had to break up because of Annie's moving, it made me realize I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. I've kind of ignored you lately, and I'm sorry," Sirius said.

Lily looked speechless. After a moment, she said, "Oh, Siri...I...I love you too. I always will, even if you ignore me. But I was starting to think you didn't care about me."

Sirius kissed her gently. "I do, Flower, more than you probably realize."

The couple sat in the Astronomy Tower for a long time, occasionally kissing or snogging, before they left. They walked back down to the main castle, and were startled to see how much time had passed. It was nearly lunchtime!

"Bloody Hell!" Sirius gasped. "How could that much time pass?"

Lily smiled at her boyfriend. "Time flies when you're having fun."

Sirius gave her a sly smile. "Oh, that wasn't fun...this is." Then Sirius kissed Lily in the middle of the hallway.

"Siri!" Lily squealed, "Stop it! Kisses are for private moments! Not in the middle of the hallway!"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Come on, Flower. Maybe we should...um...walk around until lunchtime."

Lily nodded, so the couple walked in the direction of the library, holding hands. Sirius suddenly burst out laughing. "Looks like James and Annie don't share your kissing beliefs!" Lily looked where Sirius was pointing and starting giggling.

Annie was leaning against the wall. James was kissing her.

He had his hand up her shirt.

Sirius grinned at Lily. She whispered, "Are you thinking what I think you're thinking?"

"What do you think I'm thinking that you think I'm thinking?" Sirius replied.

"I think you're thinking what I think you're thinking and I think you're thinking about yelling out 'Hi James!' or something like that," Lily said.

Sirius grinned and held up one finger, then two, then three. "HI JAMES, HI ANNIE!"

They both jumped.

"Sirius Orion Black!" James yelled.

"Lillian Angie Anne-Marie Evans!" Annie yelled at the same time.

Sirius sniggered. "Lillian Angie Anne-Marie Evans? You said your middle name was just Marie!"

Lily blushed. "Andromeda Cassiopeia Starr, I'm going to kill you!"

Annie shrugged. "Not if you're already dead."

"That's right," James added, "We have to kill you two for interrupting us."

James and Annie exchanged a look, nodded, leapt on Sirius and Lily, and started tickling them. "Apologize!" James demanded.

"I'm--sorry!" Lily shrieked, laughing.

James and Annie stopped tickling her, but continued tickling Sirius.

"St-stop!" Sirius laughed.

"Not until you apologize," Annie replied.

Sirius laughed madly as he shook his head. "Never!" James and Annie kept tickling him, joined by Lily. "Come--on, I-I mean--it!"

"Apologize then!" James yelled.

Sirius started gasping for breath. "All--right, I'm--sorry!"

They stopped, and Sirius began panting like his Animagus counterpart. "I see...you talked...to Annie."

"I see you have a reason for being a dog," James replied.

Sirius grinned, still panting. "So, do you two realize it's nearly lunchtime?"

"Nearly? It is lunchtime now, Siri," Lily said.

Sirius gasped, a look of pretend horror on his face. "Oh no! The great Padfoot the Great is late for lunch!"

Everyone laughed, and James then said, "Sirius and Lillian, would you care to join my lovely date Andromeda and I on a double date to the Great Hall?"

"Why yes, Sir James, we would love to," Lily replied. So, holding hands, the two couples went to the Great Hall.

Sirius sat down next to Remus, with Lily on his other side. James sat across from Remus with Annie across from Sirius.

"Hey Remus, what have you been up to?" Sirius asked.

Remus shrugged. "Not much."

"Did you have a wonderful time away from James and me?"

"Hmmm," Remus replied.

Sirius knew something was wrong. "Remie? What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing, Sirius. I was just, you know...thinking about my Mum and Dad..."

Sirius nodded. "Oh."

"But I'm going to stop thinking about that. So, Lily, Sirius, James, Annie, did you have fun?"

Lily blushed, Sirius nodded, but James looked sad.

"James?" Sirius asked.

James sighed. "Well, Annie will be moving soon, and I...I was just...thinking about how much I'll miss..." A tear slipped from James' eye. "Now I'm crying over it. Great."

"Hey, crying is okay," Sirius said. "But we can all still be friends, though, right?"

"Yeah, I guess. But I...I'll miss you as a girlfriend though Annie," James said sniffling, partly to Sirius, partly to Sirius.

A new, very unwelcome voice said, "Hey Potter, picked up a few things from the mon--I mean, Lupin?"

This caused a bit of an uproar.

Sirius yelled, "SHUT UP, SNAPE!"

"Bastard!" Annie added.

James glared and said, "Go back to your little bunch of Death Eaters."

And Remus, his fists clenched, stood up and said, in a would-be-calm tone, "Go. To. HELL!"

"Well, I'm impressed. Lupin didn't cry this time."

Sirius snapped. He stood up and punched Snape in the nose, breaking it again. "Shut up about us Snape! NOW!"

Snape glared at him. "I will say what I want, Black! And you can't stop me!"

"No, but all of us together could certainly do some harm to your ugly face. And maybe some other places too," James added.

Snape sneered. "Oh yeah? What harm could a couple of girls, some obnoxious boys and a monster do?"

In one movement, Remus grabbed the front of Snape's robes and slammed him against the wall. "I would advise you to shut the fuck up now!" he growled.

Snape quaked under Remus' fierce stare.

"Lupin! What is the meaning of this?" Carson asked, dashing over.

"Snape came over and started insulting us, sir," Remus answered.

Carson sneered. "And that gives reason to attack him? I don't think so, Lupin!"

Sirius wasn't going to let Remus take all the blame. "Um, I broke his nose, sir."

"And I verbally assaulted him," James confessed.

"I did too," Annie added.

"You should all be expelled," Carson hissed.

Professor McGonagall came over. "What is the problem here, Professor Carson?"

"Lupin and Black physically assaulted Snape, Potter and Starr verbally assaulted him, Minerva," Carson said.

"Explain," McGonagall said.

"Well, Professor, James was a little...er...upset, and Snape came over and said something like, 'Potter learned a few things from the monster, I mean Lupin', because he's came by when I was um, crying, once, and so, um, Sirius, Annie, James and I basically told him to go away, and insulted him, he said 'I'm surprised Lupin didn't cry this time'. Sirius then...erm, punched Snape in the nose and told him to shut up, Snape said something like, 'What harm could a couple of girls, some obnoxious boys and a monster do' and then I um...grabbed Snape's robes and um, slammed him against the wall. That was when Professor Carson came over," Remus explained. Now that Sirius heard someone saying it aloud, it seemed a childish thing to have done.

"Is this true Mr. Snape?" McGonagall asked.

Snape nodded, slightly sullen, because he had to admit to the insults.

"All right, ten points from Slytherin, twenty from Gryffindor, detention for three days for Black and Lupin, and detention for one night for Snape because I believe Dumbledore said something about not telling about something," McGonagall said.

They all nodded, and the professors and Snape left them.

"Well, it could have been worse," James said.

Sirius sort of half-smiled. "Yeah."

The week went by. Remus and Sirius served their detentions, and James and Annie snogged every day. Then on Friday, Annie packed her trunk. Saturday came all too soon.

"I'm really going to miss you guys," Annie said, crying.

"We'll miss you too," Remus said. The others nodded.

Annie smiled through her tears. "I know."

Lily sighed. "You're my best friend. Always will be."

Annie sniffled. "You're mine Lily."

Professor McGonagall entered the common room. "Andromeda, your parents are here."

Annie burst into a fresh wave of tears. "Bye guys."

"Bye Annie," everyone murmured.

Lily hugged her friend, then Remus did, Peter, Sirius, and finally James.

"I love you," James whispered in her ear.

Annie sniffled. "Me too." she whispered back. "Bye..." she said as she left the common room.

None of them ever saw her again.