Fireworks

No matter what everyone used to think, George Weasley was always his own person. Personally, he always used to think of himself as the brain, while Fred was his beloved sidekick, though of course Fred always claimed it was just the other way around. Either way, George Weasley, his brother's mirror or not, used to be satisfied with his life. He and Fred shared a joke shop to which they were highly dedicated, he had a loving family, and enough money to fool around all he liked. George Weasley truly cherished his carefree, bachelor life.

Molly Weasley, on the other hand, didn't. "It's about time you met a nice woman and started your own family, George!" she always told him, never mistaking him with his brother anymore. Mind you, not that it was very difficult to tell them apart nowadays: Fred was the one prancing around the shop with little pink hearts floating around his head. That is, until the charm Nelly had put on him wore off, after which they spent the day having spirited Dungbomb wars until the next-door shopkeepers barged in angrily and demanded they stopped chasing away customers.

Still, there was no way around it. Even Fred himself had, though somewhat grumpily, confided in George that evening that he indeed married Nell for love, rather than because she worked for the Ministry, and he was just trying to know the enemy (as he was telling everybody else).

It seemed everybody was set on having him settled. That's what happens when married people are getting too happy (or too bored), George reflected. They want everyone else to be happy as well, and never seem to realize that what works so well for them might not work as well for their miserable victim, who just happened to be their brother.

He never meant to remain the last single Weasley. It just happened that everyone got married before him. Bill was now four years snuggled with Fleur Delacour, and Percy had his very suitable, very formidable Mrs. Percy. Fred was permanently and blissfully attached to Nelly the tyrant, Ron and Hermione had their first child, Ginny only recently became Mrs. Potter the way she always dreamed, and Charlie was married to his job. All the married, domestic happiness made George sick.

As he always been the twin fascinated with numbers, George had decided an evening accompanied by the store's checkbooks would be a treat. Especially after the big-loving-family-dinner he'd just attended. So he stretched on his manager's seat, and waved his wand with a simple Calculatus spell.

The next morning, George woke up to find an owl from his brother, informing him that Fred wouldn't be at the store that day. "Nelly wants me to help her clean the house," scribbled Fred, who probably forgot that house cleaning used to be a man-restricted activity. Last time it was little George-Arthur that seemed to catch a highly infectious, gravely dangerous wizards disease, finally exposed at St. Mungo's as a simple flu, and before that, Nelly had this refurnishing idea, and stole Fred for a whole week! There were women who wanted to take over the world, mused George, and the men who were just too blind or too hormone-struck to stop them.

So George went on to the shop, grumbling and mumbling. Since it was mid-October, and most of the joke shop's costumers were Hogwarts students, the majority of the store's income this time of the year came from shipments. George spent his morning packing and sending bundles, and polishing the outlines of his plan for Saving Fred. He was just trying to figure out a way to spell Nelly into giving Fred permission to think for himself, as he heard the doorbell ringing loudly.

Through the door stormed tall, slender women. Her mass of curly reddish-brown hair stuck out in every direction, her mouth was set and her eyes were sparkling with anger. "Mr. Weasley," she told him, "this will be the end of you."

George blinked. The women standing in front of him was no other then Percy's ex-girlfriend: Penelope Clearwater. "Penny...?" He asked, flustered.

"It's Ms. Clearwater to you, you youth-corrupting, shrewd, cunning, no-good trickster."

George cleared his throat. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me, Ms. Clearwater?"

She outstretched her arm, handing him an empty package of the Weasley Twins' fireworks. "Well, it is an empty package of fireworks," he told Penelope, "and very good fireworks, at that."

"I didn't come here to listen to you bragging," Penelope snapped.

"Then you came looking for Percy? You of all people have to know Percy considerers us the rotten part of the family. And oh, I forgot to mention, Percy was married a couple of years ago, so you better give it up, not that I could ever start to imagine why should anybody in their right minds wan-"

"Oh, shut up!"

"A sore point?" he suggested with an evil grin.

Penelope glared at George. "It looks like one of my students thought it will be fun to do a Weasley Twins homage and set the school afire with these!"

"Sounds like a person I'd like to meet. Would you send him my greetings for the extremely good use he put our products to?"

"You Ev-" she started, and then changed her mind. "Well. I want you to stop selling these things to the Hogwarts students. You're mutilating the best of our youth!"

George sighed, and decided to kill Fred later, for letting him handle this on his own. He didn't know Penelope Clearwater became a teacher at Hogwarts, yet he wasn't surprised to hear that she had. Penelope has always been the didactic type. He wondered what she would be teaching. Arithmancy, maybe. Or even Transfiguration, now that Dumbeldore retired and McGonagall was appointed Headmistress.

She looked better then he remembered. Adulthood did strange things to people. Her gray eyes were big and sharp, her cheekbones more distinct. And her figure... well, no complaint in that department either. From a slim, scrawny teenager, she blossomed into a well-shaped, curvy woman. And thinking about that, thought George, was morbid. The woman was Percy's ex-girlfriend! For all he knew, she could be as insane as his brother!

"Are you listening to me?" she inquired.

"Yes, of course." He was actually staring at her modest neckline. Way too modest.

Penelope frowned. "Liar! You're staring at my neckline!"

"What there is of it," George admitted soberly, "and that's not much. Not nearly enough."

"You scoundrel!" she exclaimed. "I know what you're trying to do! You're trying to distract me so you can turn on the subject!"

George protested. "No, I'm not! I was only trying to get a better look!"

"You are a pervert, Fred Weasley!"

He coughed. "Fred Weasley, if you really want to know, is now serving a life-time penalty, laboring for my monocrat sister-in-law."

"George, then, as if it makes a difference."

"Of course it does! I'm much prettier!"

"No, you're not, and you won't get away with it!"

"Get away with what?" grumbled a very irritated George.

"With corrupting my students."

"I've got news for you, Ms. Clearwater. It's not me corrupting your students; they come this way."

"Yet you supply them with the means to cause severe destruction."

"Me? I'm only selling my merchandise."

"Designed especially for the average trouble-seeking Hogwarts student. Mr. Weasley," she said, "If you won't find a way to collaborate with me, I'm going to apply to the Ministry of Magic and ask them to close your store."

"You're being absurd, Penny. What is this nonsense?"

"It's not nonsense!" cried Penelope, her voice slightly breaking. "I just spent six hours trying to shut down an everlasting fireworks eruption, and I promise you, I'm not kidding!"

"No, you're suffering a nervous breakdown. It's not surprising, taking into consideration you're teacher at Hogwarts... though it probably takes a certain amount of masochism... Oh, God, Penelope, I'm not built for this kind of things! Don't do that! Please stop crying or I'll have a nervous breakdown myself and we will be hospitalized together at St. Mungo's!"

But it was all too much for Penelope. She had woken up to the sound of exploding fireworks, and had ever since tried to shut them down. Professor McGonagall was abroad, in a formal visit to Beauxbuton, and Professor Snape was dwelling in glee, seeing the new head of Gryffindor House failing in her mission. The other teachers did help, but Penny was insulted, tired, and out of her element. And now here she was, crumbling on the floor of the Weasley Twins joke shop, her hair electrified with all the anger she felt, crying her heart out in front of George Weasley. In the name of the founders, this was all so embarrassing. Penny burst into a second wave of tears.

She saw the Weasley twin approaching, too exhausted to wipe off his hand. Tired, she let George Weasley walk her to the storage room. There, he dived into his pocket for a stained handkerchief and made an awkward attempt at wiping Penelope's tears.

That was bewildering.

That was actually cute.

Oh, Gad, Penny! You really need to get some if you don't want to find yourself desperate, single, and chronically sex-crazed at 30. Sniffling hard, she raised her head. George Weasley was staring at her with misty, perplexed hazel eyes. Penny remembered thinking the Weasley twins were never actually repulsive. It was only the fact they played too many jokes for their own good, which made some of the girls list them out from their optional dates list. And still, when she heard - about three years ago - that one of them was getting married; Penny wondered who the hell was the woman crazy enough to marry a Weasley twin. George could have told her Nelly Osmond was a perfectly normal young witch, who worked at the Ministry of Magic as one of Cornelius Fudge's assistants, and was truly in love with her husband.

Penny gazed at George beyond a veil of tears. He had a long-ish face, his pale complexion was scattered with freckles. His mane of red hair was slightly dishevelled, and his lips seemed amazingly soft. She was probably going nuts, because the next moment Penelope lifted her head, and met these incredibly appealing lips with her own. Well, there goes the last shred of dignity, and she couldn't care less.

Doctor Penelope Clearwater wasn't the woman to be tempted into a short, hasty love affair. As she always prided herself, Penny was a creature of rhyme and reason, never to be swept to action by a sheer, emotional, and irrational impulse.

The only child of a muggle father - an English professor at Cambridge - and a wizard mother - who was a senior healer at St. Mungo's - Penelope Jane Clearwater was raised to be the top of her class. She was the best student in her house (which was very respectable considering she was a Raveclaw), Prefect, and then a Head Girl (no one expected less of Penny), and then spent seven years of her life learning and teaching Transfiguration's-Arithmancy at the most distinguished wizarding university of Oxford (the restricted department, naturally). At her fourth year in Hogwarts she started dating Percival Weasley and was in every way certain she will be married to him some day. Everything went wrong ten years ago, on the year of Voldemort's exceptional comeback, when Percy, whom she loved dearly, turned his back on his family, Dumbledore, and everything Penelope believed in. He still wanted them to be together, of course. It was Penny who ended their relationship. She couldn't possibly live with a man who walked away from his own family.

Penny was heartbroken. Parted from the man she loved, Penelope immersed herself in her studies. Within several years, she published her doctorate thesis and became one of her profession's extremely appreciated scholars. It took two years of University teaching and one very appealing proposal from the newly appointed Hogwarts headmistress for Penelope to rethink her so far amazingly successful career. At twenty-five, she became Hogwarts teacher of Transfiguration, and head of Gryffindor House.

Penny had managed numerous relationships ever since she left Percy Weasley, but at nearly 30, Professor Penelope Clearwater was still single. And not to mention the worst: kissing George Weasley like a madwoman. But who could possibly blame her!? The guy knew the job, and Penny was beginning to realize how kiss-starved she became during her last months of loneliness.

His lips parted hers with a gentle pressure, his tongue sneaking in, to claim her mouth. It was sweet, oh so sweet. Penelope angled her head, giving him an easier approach, and their kiss deepened. Several minutes afterwards, she found herself lying on the floor, her body tangled with George's and having the time of her life.

"Oh sweet Lord, I can't believe I'm doing this...! Yes! Don't you dare stop now, or I'm going to kill you. Dear Heavens, Weasley!" she choked, "what are you doing to me...?"

He grinned, breathing heavily. "I'm fucking you."

"That was extremely rude!" rebuked Penelope, crossing her legs around George's waist. "Your language is unacceptable."

"Your body is unacceptable," he kissed her, "has anybody ever told you, you have the most beautiful breasts?"

"No," she answered, groaning.

"Then you were dating blind fools. You know, Fred has always used to say you broke up with Percy after he refused to try some extremely bizarre position. Like woman-on-top. I'm beginning to buy that."

"Oh!" exclaimed Penny, irritated. "Your brother and I had a very satisfying sex life, thank you."

George laughed, thrusting. "Did he ever tell you that you're beautiful?"

"No," she said, sobbing. "Am I?"

"Did he ever make you come like that?"

"I didn't come yet, so shut up."

"But... you're...going... to."

She did. Crying like a maniac, breathing hard, more fully and more satisfyingly than

Penelope could ever remember. Then he collapsed over her, and she could feel his warm breath on her skin. Penny closed her eyes, enjoying the moment. She knew the minute any of them spoke she'll hate herself for doing what she just did, and hate George for being part of it, and she knew this moment was coming.

"It was really good, Penny," he whispered at last, and was just... too sweet and too tender for Penelope to yell at him.

Again, she was on the verge of tears. "I must leave. Please let go of me."

George rolled on his side, watching Penelope who was frantically picking up her scattered clothes. "Look, Penny, none of us had meant for this to happen, but as it already-"

"Don't. Just... don't," she said, rising to her feet. She was all dressed up now. Apart from her wildly curling hair and her slightly wrinkled cloths, she looked as meticulous as when she stepped into the joke shop. Half-dressed, George watched Penelope run out of the store, and then disappear down the street.

Later that day, Fred had surprisingly popped-up, claiming he managed to escape Nelly the dictator. George wasn't buying. To his opinion, Nelly simply granted Fred the permission to leave. Although he would be genuinely happy to see his brother any other time, right now, George was too distracted to enjoy the company.

"What is it, Feorge?" inquired Fred, worried. "You're not behaving like yourself today."

"Direct hit, Mr. Weasley. I am a runaway Death Eater, using a Polyjuice Potion in order to appear like your twin brother. As you're not supposed to know that, I guess I'll simply have to kill you."

"That wasn't even funny," Fred complained, "You must be truly disturbed for making such a poor joke. What is it, George?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Well- let me guess. Have you screwed up another experiment with those new runaway lollipops?"

"Shut up, Fred."

"Mmm... Did Mother call you to say she's disappointed with the way you're wasting your life?"

"Shut up, I said."

"Ok! I got it! It's a girl! You met a girl!"

At this stage of the conversation, George decided he rather risk Nelly's wrath then being Fred's subject of mockery, and pointed his wand toward his brother.

"Who is she?"

"Silencio!"

* * *

"And then... And then we kissed!" Penny was crying her heart out in front of her cousin and best friend, Demeter Tingles. "I kissed George Weasley!" she exclaimed.

"Well, I can hardly blame you," said Demeter. "He's very cute."

Penelope sighed. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Of course I am. You were just saying you kissed George Weasley and I answered I can't blame you."

"B-but... He's a Weasley twin!"

"Mmm... Then I guess you can go for the triplet thing."

"You're just.... horrible!" cried Penelope.

"Why? Because I feel free to enjoy my sexual affairs and you don't?" Demeter stretched on the grin sofa at Penny's small teacher's dwelling, staring at her friend. "Look, sweetie. You and George Weasley are both grown up adults, well, at least you, obligation free, and probably needed this pause. I can see no reason for whining."

"Oh, can't you understand Demeter? It's so... not me! I don't do these kinds of things!"

"Then you better start soon, honey."

"It was... I was... swept away."

"So he's probably very good."

"Heavens, Demeter! I was dating his brother!"

"Is he any good?"

"That's not the point!"

"Is he?"

Penelope went silent.

"Is he any good, then?"

"Yes, he is," Penny admitted at last. "Are you happy now?"

Demeter grinned. "Did you like him?"

"Oh... well. He was really sweet... and kind," Penny laughed as she remembered the way he wiped her tears. "Especially after I was yelling at him like a maniac. He said I'm beautiful. Oh God, Demeter... How could I be such an idiot...?"

* * *

It took Fred about twenty minutes and one innocent costumer to get free of the Silencio spell. Fred had always been nosey. Now he was also angry. "Who is she, George?"

"I told you, there's no one!"

"Like hell there isn't!"

"Bugger!"

"Not before you confess!"

George glared furiously at his annoying brother. "It was Penny, o.k.?" he shouted.

Fred's eyes stuck out. "Penny? Like in Penny Clearwater?"

"Is there any other Penny that you know of?" George asked angrily.

"Since when do you call her Penny?"

"Since when is it your god damn business?"

"She was Percy's girlfriend!"

"They broke up!"

"She can be crazy!"

"I'm warning you, Fred, one more word about Penny and I-"

"Hello guys!" Ginny Potter stepped into the shop, a broad smile lightening her pretty face. "Harry and I are doing some shopping for the new house. I thought it would be nice if I might come over to say hello. Am I interrupting anything?"

"George is in love," informed Fred.

"Fred is crazy," said George.

"In love with whom?" inquired Ginny.

"Oh, that's rich, you're going to love this one," Fred was clearly enjoying himself.

"Well, come on," urged Ginny, "Spill it out, Fred, I can see you're dying to tell."

Fred was smug. "It's Penny."

"Penny? Like in Penelo-"

"Yes," George interrupted angrily. "And please skip the I-can't-believe-it-thing."

Fred muttered. "You're ruining the fun."

But Ginny was gleaming. "That is so wonderful, George," she said happily "You've been single for all too long, it's about time you-"

"Look, Gin, I know how the phrase goes. Secondly, Penny and I have just met, for Merlin's sake, don't you think it's a bit to early to propose?"

Ginny took it completely the wrong way. "So you're going to propose?"

"Ginny," George inquired, "Are you mental?"

"Well, it's always clever to think ahead," was Ginny's calculated answer. "So, how about you and Penny? How did you meet her? How is she like now? I heard she's a teacher at Hogwarts."

George grumbled. "That's none of your business, Gin."

"Of course it is!" she protested. "I'm your only sister!"

And Fred was his only twin, Bill his only senior brother, Ron the offspring, and his parents... well, after all, they were his parents. Luckily enough, Charlie was in Romania, or else he and a bunch of dragons would be torturing George for answers right now. By the end of the hour, there wasn't a single Weasley (including in-laws) who didn't know of George's latest affair.

So it was simply inevitable that he ran away.

George Apparated near a small fisherman's village, then sat a long hour on the edge of a cliff, staring at the sea. Fred was a bastard. Ginny was bloodthirsty monster, hungry for details. His mum was trying to strangle George with her love and motherly care. Penelope was sweet and soft and beautiful, and she probably hated him. Hell. He wanted his life back. He was becoming overly dramatic. He wanted Penelope.

The waves have been rhythmically crashing against the cliff for about thirty minuets now. All this intense thinking gave George a headache. He was supposed to be thinking of new tricks, not pondering the complicated relationship he and Percy's former girlfriend didn't have. He had to do something.

George rose to his feet, dusting his trousers. There was no point sitting on the edge of a cliff thinking about her for the whole damn day. If he wanted so much to see Penelope, he might as well do it. He willed himself to Disapparate not far away from Hogsmeade, and, for the first time in ten years, made the way to the grumpy old castle.

The sky was slowly darkening as he walked past the green lawns and into Hogwarts castle. A couple of students on their way to the Great Hall were staring at him. He greeted them- to their utter surprise, and continued toward the teachers' lodges. Unlike most of the students, he and Fred actually been there a couple of times. No good intentions, of course. This time was different. He was so immersed in his thoughts, George has barely noticed where or on whom he was stepping.

Argus Filch had burst with screams of horror. "You!!!!" cried Filch, nearly fainting at the site of a despicable Weasley Twin, his worst nightmare, defiling Hogwarts corridors. "You came back here haunt me! It's not happening! I refuse to believe it!"

George coughed. "Amm, look, Mr. Filch, I'm really excited to see you, too, but you're in my way..."

"Go away, you evil spirit!" yelled Filch, brandishing his hands, "Get away from me, oh wicked ghost, I-"

"Well, it was really nice meeting you, Mr. Filch," George mumbled, and nudged his way past the horror-struck caretaker. "See you next time I'm around, say hi to Mrs. Norris, would'ya? Goodbye, Argus!"

Oh, Penny, he thought hopelessly, sane people just don't teach at Hogwarts! No wonder you're suffering a nervous breakdown!

* * *

Demeter left at mid-afternoon, living a bit more insightful Penelope behind. Determined to enjoy the rest of her evening, Penny washed her face, took a bath, and settled in her bed with a volume of Advanced Arithmancy - Transfiguration-Charms' Theorems. She was deeply immersed in a very interesting theorem when she heard someone knocking on her door.

"Just a minute!" she called, hastily wrapping herself with a robe. "I'm coming!"

Penelope opened the door, her face slightly flushed.

"Oh, I knew I'm good, but thanks for reassuring me."

Then she turned red. George Weasley was standing on her doorway, lips curled with a smug, characteristic smile. He was terribly cute- a little too cute, actually. He was handsome enough to make her heart race.

"That wasn't funny, Weasley," she snapped. "What are you doing here?"

"What do you think I'm doing here?"

"In the life of me, I have no idea. So you better explain yourself."

He smiled. And then he leaned forward, capturing her lips with his. George's mouth was sweet, soft, and luxurious, exactly the way she remembered. Penelope moaned, clinging to him. Her breasts were cushioned against his torso, extremely sensitive nipples erecting to the touch. His tongue was doing wonderful things to her, his fingers, too. And they were standing in her doorway where everyone passing by could see. "In," she ordered, dragged George inside and closed the door behind them.

* * *

They were married six months later, in the Burrow's backyard. It was a beautiful summer day, the birds were happily chirping, the gnomes snorted quietly in their dens, and Molly Weasley was practically delirious. Penelope's mother, too.

Fred was gloating, but Fred was a git and George had more important things to do right now. First of all, dealing with the fact he and Filch were sharing the same castle again. Or maybe having Hogwarts Transfiguration teacher as his wife. Life, George mused, was very poor on good jokes. But he liked it anyway.