Roof-Top

He didn't like parties, he never had. He slipped quietly up the stairs; it wasn't as if he would be missed. As he reached the door to the dormitory his vision blurred. Blinking, he opened the door. 'I don't like parties,' he thought to himself. 'That's all, I don't like parties.' He made his way across the dormitory and climbed the windowsill. It was a perfect windowsill; you could get on the roof. Carefully he climbed onto the roof and sat on his cloak. Blinking, he looked up at the darkening sky. He smiled; how appropriate; Sirius the Dog Star, just perfect for the boy downstairs celebrating. Blinking again he tried to make the tears go away. "It's just the party, I don't like parties, that's all." He whispered to himself. He gave up; they would come whether he wanted them to or not.

"Remus, Rem are you up there?" That was Sirius's voice. What was he doing here?

He cleared his throat and tried to keep the tears out of his voice. "Yeah, I'm up here. But why aren't you partying?"

Sirius's head poked through the window and looked at him with raised eyebrows. "How did you get up there?"

"Same way I have since the first night." He said simply.

Sirius blinked at him and looked around before climbing carefully up next to the smaller boy. "What's the matter Rem?" He had seen the other boy's tear stained face.

"Nothing Sirius. It's nothing, you should get back to your party."

"It's boring down there and you're more fun. And something is wrong; I can read you. What's the matter?"

Remus turned sharply to Sirius. "Nothing is the matter Sirius, you're lucky to have a party, now go back to it!"

"What's the matter Rem?"

"Nothing Sirius, please go back."

"Remus, when's your birthday?"

"Don't change the subject Sirius, please go back to your party." His voice got quieter and quieter: "Please Sirius, just leave." His eyes were tearing up again.

"I'll leave as soon as you tell me your birthday."

"Sirius no!"

Sirius looked at him and sighed before climbing slowly down to the windowsill. "Come in before you get sick, ok?"

Remus nodded and Sirius climbed the rest of the way down into the dormitory.

Remus turned his attention back to the night sky, now completely dark, and felt the tears welling up again; blinking he shook his head and gasped as his cloak slipped. "Sirius!" he called the first name that came to mind. No black-haired head poked out of the window and his cloak slipped again. "Sirius! Anyone!" he called, his voice panicked. "Someone help!" he gasped as the cloak slipped all the way and he fell, his eyes darting around for a hand hold, but the entirety of the roof was covered in snow...

"Where'd you go?" James asked as Sirius came down the stairs.

"To find Rem."

James gestured for him to elaborate. "Did you?"

Sirius looked at him in surprise. "What? Yeah, he was on the roof."

"Of the tower?"

Sirius nodded.

"What if he slips?"

"He won't, this is Remus we're talking about."

"...Remus John Lupin, was a friend to many and a good student..." Sirius tuned the man out and looked around trying to find the Lupins.

"James." James looked up at him. "Do you see the Lupins?"

James raised his eyebrows; "Sirius, we can name everyone here." It was true: himself, James, Peter and, oddly enough, Lily Evans. Them and the professors, though only the ones Remus had. "Where are his parents? If I died my parents would be here. Wouldn't you?" James looked up at his parents.

"Of course James. But that's no reason to think like that, you're not going to die."

"But I could, look at Remus."

"James?" his father said hesitantly.

"...And so we wish him luck in the next life; may he have a much better life." The man who was speaking finished and people started to leave.

"Yeah dad?"

"How well did you know Remus?"

"We were friends."

"Did you know about his...ah..." he cast around for the right word. "Illness?"

"We knew he was sick a lot, but he didn't talk about it much."

"Remus was sick, he is probably much better off now. He had a very painful life." They where the only ones left now, James and Sirius and James's father.

"No one's better off dead. Not even a...a vampire or something."

James's dad took a deep breath and looked at them. "What about a werewolf?"

"Well yeah, but I don't see the point of that," James said, shrugging.

Sirius gasped. "Was Remus a werewolf, Mr. Potter?"

Mr. Potter nodded. "Yeah, he was bitten when he was little. And his parents weren't too happy-"

Sirius cut him off. "He's never had a birthday party, or not that he can remember anyway. He said to me, two days ago, I was up on the roof with him and he said to me, 'You're lucky to have a birthday party, go enjoy it' or something like that." Sirius looked up at Mr. Potter.

"I don't know, but I doubt that he did."

"Mr. Potter?"

"Yes Sirius?"

"When was Remus's birthday?"

Mr. Potter sighed. "November 17^th."

"But that's my birthday." Mr. Potter nodded. "Oh god we had that huge party and we didn't get him anything."

"It's all right Sirius," Ms. Potter had come back and was hugging him. "Just let it out," she whispered to him.

"It's all my fault." Sirius realized there were tears in his eyes. "I should have stayed up there with him, he wouldn't have fallen." He broke down then and Ms. Potter shooed them out of the room.

"It wasn't his fault, dad," James said, looking at his dad. "I know it wasn't."

"I know James, but we have to help Sirius, ok?"

James nodded.

20 some years later:

"James?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember Remus Lupin?"

"That kid from second year who fell off the roof?"

"Yeah."

"If he had lived and hadn't fallen off the roof, do you think our lives would be different?"

"Yeah..."

"Daddy!!" a ten-year-old blond boy came running towards James.

"Yeah, Robby?"

"Do I get to go to Hogwarts next year?"

"Shh. Don't mention Hogwarts."

"Sorry," Robby mumbled, "I forgot."

It started to rain then and they all ran for the indoors. No one wanted to be caught in the rain, not now with the rain being acid; a new invention of the dark lord's.

"Close the windows Rachel!" James called to his wife. "It's raining."

It's raining...it's raining...it's raining...it's raining...

"It's raining, Remus, come inside." Remus looked down at Sirius's head, "Come down before you slip and fall..."

And fall and fall and fall and fall...

~end~