Breeze

Remus didn't remember when he had last felt this cold. The window that he was sitting before was thrown open, but the cold didn't come from outside. It was already in. Inside him.

From time to time he could glimpse the nearly full moon through the clouds. The night looked alive and real, nothing like the dead, cold stillness of the room. The clouds moved; the leaves of the Forbidden Forest waved gently in the breeze. From time to time he could hear the distant noises of the Owlery carried by the wind to him.

And somewhere, there, in the cold night, was Sirius Black.

Remus could feel him, he could almost see him out there, moving from shadow to shadow, lurking around the Hogwarts grounds, seeking a way in. Remus didn't know what he would do once inside, but he knew that neither Harry nor he would be safe. Not even here, so close to Dumbledore. He shivered, collecting his blue blanket tighter around him. It didn't drive the coldness away, but it provided some comfort, however little it was.

Suddenly he heard the door opening behind his back. The room was dark, the wind had extinguished his only candle some time ago, without him even noticing the sudden dark. But now the darkness seemed to gather more thickly around him, whispering its cold secrets into his ears and making the hair in his neck stand up.

"Who's there?" he called, his voice cracking.

"Me. Who do you suppose it is?" came the answer from the dark. Remus recognised the voice immediately.

"Severus. You gave me a scare," he confessed, trying not to sound relieved, but failing.

"Mmhm," Severus muttered as a way of a reply, coming closer so that Remus could see him in the moonlight. He looked exactly like he always looked. Stern and unsmiling. "What are you doing, sitting in the dark?"

Remus shrugged. "Nothing much." What could he have said? That he was scared and waiting for Sirius to come and kill him too? That he almost wanted it to happen just so that he would see him again?

He thought how strange this was. They pretended that they were nothing more than colleagues, strangers to each other. Like their whole shared past within these walls had never happened. It created this strange, uncomfortable feeling, whenever they were together. And it wasn't just that. There was something else... something that Remus wasn't able to face yet.

A dead silence had fallen between them. Remus sat there, watching Severus watching him. Then, finally, Severus moved.

"Here, take this," he said, offering a mug of something to Remus. Wolfsbane potion. "Aren't you supposed to drink this?" he asked, knowing the answer full well.

"Yes," Remus said anyway. He lifted his hand, to take the mug from Severus.

But instead of giving it to him, Severus put it on the table and grabbed his hand with his own, pulling Remus out of his chair, dropping the blankets around their feet.

Remus fell forward, losing his balance, straight to Severus's arms. "What--" he yelped, but was silenced quickly.

Severus's lips were dry on Remus's mouth, the kiss cold and static. Still it stirred something inside Remus, something warm that chased the coldness away. He found himself wanting to deepen the kiss, wanting to grab Severus and not let go. Anything was better than this coldness.

But Severus let go of him and moved past him, to the open window. Remus heard him close it, the hinges creaking loudly in the suddenly still air.

"There," he heard Severus mutter while he shut the world outside.