The Veil Can Wait

Sirius didn't mean to fall. And why would he? Falling was failure, and the only reason he was here was because Harry just had to be the little twit to rush out to the Ministry with his friends in a move of utter suicide. Not that Sirius particularly minded; it was an act of bravery. Something James would have happily gone along with. Sirius only wished he had thought of it first. For as scary as it was, with Death Eaters moving in like a plague, it was the most excitement available for months. It was terrible of him to think like that, but it was the truth. Here he was, the feared convict Sirius Black, roaming the very halls of the Ministry of Magic in an incredible twist of irony regardless of whatever Albus thought.

He liked it. He liked it more than anything. This was the reason he had burst out of prison. Well, not the reason, but wasn't this what freedom was supposed to be about? He could almost taste the blood at his lips after it surged like lava through his veins. The greatest of feelings.

It was supposed to be so easy. Get in, get Harry, fight evil, get out, having fun on the way.

So he clearly wasn't supposed to fall.

He should have seen it in Bellatrix's eyes. They had never got along anyway. And now, with her a respectable Black Death Eater, why wouldn't she have a reason to kill him?

He probably could have defended himself, in that final moment. He saw the beam out of the corner of his eye, bright and venomous. Painful, but not one of the more harmful spells. I could take it, was his one thought. He would have to take it, if he expected to attack anyone else. He wouldn't need to defend himself.

It hurt as it struck him, and threw him off of his feet. He should have at least been prepared for balance.

He felt the curtains flutter at his face. Voices. He could hear voices. Of course he could; people were everywhere.

But they didn't have voices like this.

James?

There wasn't any floor on the other side of the curtain.

* * * * *

"'Morning, sunshine!"

Sirius groaned. He never had been a morning person; one of the few benefits of Azkaban was the continual darkness. And even more he hated it when James pulled that stupid phrase.

But James was...

Sirius was suddenly awake. James was dead. Had been murdered almost fifteen years ago. He knew that.

Yet James, just as he remembered him, stood before him, strangely bright in a room of utter blackness. Azkaban again?

"James," Sirius said hoarsely. Yes, it was James, black hair forced to messiness, dark red robes, and grinning happily. His best friend since school days. He felt his fingers go numb. "James."

"Yeah, it's me." James extended a hand.

Sirius stared at it. This wasn't real. He must have hit his head after Bellatrix had cast that spell. He was hallucinating. Well, if it was a dream of unconsciousness, he might as well enjoy it. After another pause, he accepted James' hand. "You... you look good."

"Thanks," James replied, pulling him to his feet. "Being dead agrees with me, oddly enough."

"Dead." Sirius forced a laugh. He didn't think he had remembered James this well. Where was his mind pulling this all from? "Yes, you would be dead. But... but it's great to see you!" Before he knew it he had his arms around James.

"Great to see you, too. And I hope to see a lot more of you."

Hopefully he'd regain consciousness sooner than that. "Well, considering you are dead...."

James cleared his throat. "Erm, Sirius?"

Sirius froze. Something was wrong. He couldn't put his finger on it, but the way James' voice dropped just then...

James looked at the ground, grimacing. "This is my first time doing anything like this. I didn't think it would be so hard to just say it. But then it had to be you. Sirius, I had expected you to stay around a lot longer than this. Especially now that you can finally keep an eye on Harry and everything."

A joke. James was just making some strange taunt. "James, what are you talking about?"

James took a deep breath and met him square in the eye. "You're dead, Sirius."

This would be a marvelous time to wake up. "What?"

James shook his head. "You heard me. You're dead."

This wasn't very funny. "James... I'm hallucinating you. I hit my head or something." Had he just called his best friend whom he hadn't seen for fifteen years a hallucination?

"On what?"

"On what?" Sirius felt his fingers squeezing themselves into a fist. "On what? The last thing I remember was Bellatrix Lestrange shooting her wand at me at the Ministry becuase your son--"

"I know, I was watching." James sighed. "You weren't just in the Ministry; you were in the Department of Mysteries. Standing on that platform with the Veil. She knocked you threw it, you idiot. You didn't hit your head on anything."

"She knocked me through a curtain and suddenly I'm dead?" He didn't mean to shout, especially not at James, but this was getting ridiculous. He couldn't possibly be dead. "I hit my head on the floor, that's all. That can't be enough to kill me."

"Wizards in the Department of Mysterious are morons, Sirius. You wouldn't believe the things they study. The Veil, the curtain you fell through, is actually an entrance to a path leading up to the Spirit World."

James as might as well churned out gibberish. "What?"

"I knew this would be hard to explain." James ran a hand through his hair, messing it up. "Look, the fact is that you are now a spirit. And it really isn't bad at all..."

He had to wake up now. He just had to. "It isn't really bad that I'm dead?!" He had a sudden urge to just throw himself at James. "I guess you're going to say next that it isn't bad Lord Voldemort killed you fifteen years ago! Your son Harry... do you have any idea what he's going though? Do you have any idea what everyone else is going through?" He grabbed a piece of his own skin and pinched hard. He wasn't waking up. Were hallucinations this real?

"I know what's going on out there," James said, grabbing Sirius roughly by the shoulders. "I'd like you out there with Harry more than anything. But the fact is that it is now too late. Do you have any idea where your body is right now?"

"My body?" Sirius looked down at himself, half-expecting to see nothing. He wasn't believing James, was he?

"You're a spirit now. And you'll just have to rely on everyone else to survive."

Sirius struggled out of James' grip, feeling his rage rise even higher. "James, what is really going on?"

There was no reply.

"James..." Sirius locked their eyes... and felt the rest of him go numb. James had never lied to him. And in that moment, a wave of horror crashed over him. "James, are you serious?"

James opened his mouth to reply, but another voice took over.

"You idiot!" A red-haired woman stomped into view, green eyes burning, and stopped in front of James, who cringed. "You idiot," she repeated, then raised her hand and smacked him.

"Lily?" Sirius heard himself say.

She whirled around, fury gone in place of a brilliant smile. "Sirius! It's wonderful to see you!" And before he could stop her she jumped on him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "No, I take that back. It's not wonderful to see you, and it's all James' fault."

"Lily," Sirius repeated. He couldn't believe this.

"I don't know what you're talking about," James said firmly. "Lily, I was just talking to Sirius--"

"That is exactly what's wrong!" she shouted, turning back on her husband. "You just went ahead and took him out of his body without a single thought!"

Now James and Sirius were both staring at her.

"Like what kind of thought?" James asked gingerly.

Lily smacked him again. "Like the fact that Sirius isn't registered to die for another sixty-three years!"

The room--wherever they were--went silent.

"Huh?"

Lily groaned. "Sirius, I'm really sorry about this."

Sirius' mind was a whirl. First he was dead, now he wasn't supposed to be dead. Hopefully he was still only hallucinating. Only that answer was quickly falling to the wayside. This was all much too real.

"But he fell through the Veil," James said. "You know what that does. It would have killed him anyway."

"Not necessarily," Lily said. "I was just... oh, look here." She pulled out a roll of parchment and opened it. "This is Sirius' fate. Or was supposed to be. See, this is his death date. Or what was supposed to be." That was accompanied by another glare.

James went pale. "But, but that's not necessarily the truth."

"And here was two minutes ago." She poked the parchment so hard she might have ripped it. "As you should perfectly well know, the living actually can survive in the realm beyond the Veil for a very short time. He just might have been rescued. Idiot."

"Let me see that." James ripped the parchment from Lily and read over it silently, a look of sickness progressively taking over.

And they were just standing there as if he didn't exist, Sirius thought. "Let me see that."

James held it away. "Sorry. For angel eyes only. But... Sirius, I'm really sorry about this. I guess, I guess you weren't supposed to die back there."

"So it's all been just a horrible mistake? I can go back?" This was perfect. "And if you're angels..."

Lily closed her eyes. "Sirius, please blame my husband for this. But, no, you can't go back. James has ruined it."

Lily did have her own moments of joking. "But you just said I wasn't supposed to die. Lily, Harry is back there. I have to help him."

James handed the parchment back to Lily and faced Sirius. "I'm sorry, but I ripped your spirit from your body before you actually bit the dust. According to your fate, you would have clung to consciousness for about a quarter of an hour, long enough to keep yourself from being sucked completely into the world of the dead, long enough to cast some spell you learned from your family long ago to free yourself from that realm and pop back to the world of the living. You would have been fine. But now... it's impossible to retreive a dead body from that place. So... I guess you're just going to have to accept this."

That was too much. "No. No, James, I'm not going to accept this." He could still see Harry back in the Ministry, Remus, everyone. Fighting for their lives. He had to help them. "I spent twelve years in Azkaban. I suffered under Dumbledore's house arrest. Harry... I really need to help him. I can't die now!"

"Sirius--"

He waved James away and marched to the edge of the platform. There seemed to be more beyond it. "I'm not staying in this place."

"Of course not," Lily said quicky. "Heaven is far superior."

"You just said you were angels, James. You can do something, can't you."

Lily sighed and threw the parchment behind her. "In any other circumstance, we could just return you to your body, no problems whatsoever. But there is no possible way to get your body back now. It's gone."

She didn't understand. He adored Lily. She was one of his favorite people. But apparently she didn't understand. Was there any way to make her? "Lily, James, Harry has already lost you two. I'm his godfather. Do you know what it would do to him if he lost me as well?"

Lily flinched. "I know, but..."

"But there just isn't a body..." A grin slowly cut through the sickness on his face. "Actually, there is something we could do."

"James," Lily warned. "What are you thinking?"

"Nothing," James said happily. "Sirius, does it have to be your body you get back?"

James had apparently gone mad in the afterlife. "What?"

"Of course!" Lily shrieked. She threw her arms around James and kissed him. "I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier, but that would work, wouldn't it?"

Something else wasn't right.

Lily leaped away from James and grabbed Sirius' hand. "It's a wonderful idea. Let me explain, Sirius. We can't get your body back, but... maybe we could find you another one."