Forever

--

I can still smell the soft fragrance of her curly crimson hair... I can remember her tender, lingering touch upon my cheek... And her kiss... The memory of emotions, feelings and thoughts that played through my mind that day...

I don't know why I've finally decided to write these past events down now... Haven't even talked to anyone about all the pain and suffering I went through when she left...

I can't describe the loss I feel. Even though I had known her for years... I had taken her presence for granted. Now I'll never be able to look into her vibrant brown eyes... Touch her soft pale skin... Or feel her warm, and uplifting embrace. She was my everything... And now I feel empty... Lost... Alone.

--

It had been the last day at Hogwarts- And I was just 17. The entire school had gathered together in the Great Hall for a celebration to honor the 7^th, and last years that were off to find a new life for themselves in the wide wizarding world. 

"So you two are coming to spend the summer?" Ron said, with that same boyish grin spreading across his face.

"Of course," Hermione said, smiling also.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Harry answered.

Most of that day passed quickly. When searching for a compartment on the Hogwarts Express that next morning, she sat there alone- Her curly red hair shone brightly in the morning light. His knees went strangely weak when the girl looked up from her book, eyes glittering as the train rode on through the wilderness.

"Hello Harry," she spoke quietly, with the same familiar soft voice of the younger girl he had always felt he had known.

"Could I... Sit with you Ginny?" a smile spread across her freckled face as she nodded a yes slowly.

Harry sat across from her as she began reading her small, tattered, hand-me-down book once more. He watched her, embedding every detail of her soft skin... To quick, observant eyes. Harry knew inside the pain he had made her go through in their younger years... He could even recall a time when Ginny had asked him to a dance in his 6^th year.

He had kindly refused, and gone with Cho... But somehow it felt wrong... Harry had been lying to his heart for so long... And now he knew it must be so, as he looked at Ginny... Really looked at her for the first time in his life.

"Harry? HARRY!" He was suddenly startled out of his river of thoughts by an amused - looking Ron. Must have been snogging Hermione again by the looks of it, Harry thought airily.

"Yes?"

"Time to go - 'Mione is already outside waiting with mum!" Blatantly forgetting about Ginny for the time being, both boys sped out of the compartment, hearts lifting.

--

Ginny sighed, the tears threatening to fall. She gathered her things onto a cart, and pushed through the thick crowd of Hogwarts students unnoticed.

Invisible once again, she thought sadly, scanning the crowd for any familiar tousles of red flaming hair...

"Hi Ginny," she turned around, startled by who stood in front of her. Colin Creevey smirked, "Going home already? Maybe I could join you."

Ginny sighed inwardly. Ever since Harry had kindly put her down that year at the dance, Colin had been following her around wherever she went. It had been alright at first, considering the lack of friends she had... But Colin was just not the kind of person Ginny wanted to talk to... Not the one she wanted to spend all her free time with...

Suddenly, she felt her skin growing hotter, and the air around herself becoming scarcer. Not again, oh please...

"So can I come over?" Ginny quickly nodded him off, and Colin began to race off to where her family stood waiting over by the exit to the train station. The poor girl tried as hard as she could to struggle with her things and keep from collapsing onto the stone pavement. Ginny began coughing and breathing heavily as her lungs felt weaker.

The crowd became one black mixed blur, with Ginny struggling to breathe and stay upright with a painful force. The last thing she saw was her older brother Fred, coming toward her... That's when she fainted- falling into his long unsuspecting arms.

--

"Will she be alright?" Molly Weasley whispered softly, looking down at her one and only daughter, feeling herself shake on the verge of hysterics.

The doctor shook his head slowly, "I am sorry Mrs. Weasley... But all we can do is wait this virus out... The poor girl needs rest..."

The aged woman stood for a moment, her eyes staring down at her daughter, tears sliding down her cheeks. Ginny took a shuddering breath in, then sat up, blinking from the sharp sunlight. Her mother sniffed as the doctor left through her bedroom door, pressing past the worried - looking red headed brothers.

"Is she alright?"

"Did she die??"

"SHE CAN'T DIE FRED!!"

"Is she going to be alright?!!?"

Harry looked over the shoulder of his best friend Ron, feeling his eyes burn and his hands shake. Ginny was coughing painfully into a napkin, her skin ghostly pale and her lips turning a light blue. Mrs. Weasley looked worried, but pressed herself to shoo all her boys, including Harry, Hermione and Colin, out of the room and into the hall. The last thing Harry saw was Ginny falling back onto her pillow once more, the virus overtaking her.

"The doctor said she needs rest!" Molly yelled over the noise angrily, shutting the bedroom door quickly. "Ginny will be fine by tonight... Now everyone downstairs for lunch..."

After a few hours the boys had forgotten all about Ginny's sickness, and began practicing Quidditch outside - Just like the old days. Harry had the Quaffle... Racing toward Ron by the "goal - post" they had made... He could swerve past him easily on the Firebolt...

"SCORE!" Harry yelled happily, Ron trying to look mock offended. Fred and George smiled, but where was Colin? Harry turned to see the younger blonde haired boy walking back up to the tall house. The four boys dismounted their brooms, and followed quickly after him. Hermione, who had been sitting quietly with her Charms book under a large oak tree, stood as well catching up with the group.

"Hey Colin!" Ron reached him first at the back of their door, looking curiously at the shorter more timid boy. "Where are you off to in the middle of our game?"

"I was... Um... Going to check on how Ginny was doing," he responded. Harry suddenly felt his heart clench, slapping himself mentally. How could I forget about Ginny? How? I have to go see if she's all right... But Colin had pressed past them all, walking back in through the house in search of the girl that Harry loved.

For a moment, he felt himself glare after the younger boy, feeling a strange burning inside his heart screaming to get out... I can't be jealous... It's not like Colin is going out with Ginny, Harry thought reassuringly to himself. But he didn't know that now did he? Colin could be going up to hold her... Touch her... Kiss her... Harry shivered involuntarily, feeling the same anger flame inside his heart.

--

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The jealousy will drive you

Will drive you

MAD

His eyes upon your face

His hand upon your hand

His lips caress your skin

IT'S MORE THEN I CAN STAND

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Why does my heart cry

Feelings I can't fight

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You're free to leave me

But just don't deceive me

And please, believe me when I say

I LOVE YOU

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--

A slow creak of the floorboard announced Colin's presence, and Ginny swiveled around in her chair, looking a bit startled. The young blonde haired boy ran his sharp eyes down her features, and then strode purposely into her room. Ginny sighed.

"Colin... Not to be rude or anything... But I'd like to be alone for a moment," she whispered, half to reassure herself. But the boy didn't seem perturbed by her sudden desire to shun him.

"That's alright... I only came to see how you were," he answered, grabbing her arm almost forcefully. Ginny stared at the aged floorboards unemotionally. She knew in her heart she could never really love Colin like he thought she did... But to break someone's heart... To shatter someone's dreams... No, Ginny thought to herself, I will never hurt someone like Harry hurt me... Not ever.

"Yes Colin," she forced out as the hold on her arm grew painfully tighter.

"Don't," he hissed in her ear, "Ever tell me to leave." Tears glazed her eyes, but she merely nodded silently. Oh someone, she thought warily, someone please help me... Save me from my own horrors...

"I hope you feel better Ginny," Colin said after a while, then released her of his painful hold on her flushed arm, and walked out the door as if nothing had ever happened.

Ginny sat back on the wooden chair in her room, running her slender fingers over the aging lines of the table in front of her. Her soft brown eyes became distant as she felt her body beginning to pull back its strength once more. This sickness had taken her a while before... But no one really minded it as something important... It scared her though... It scared her that this virus could be killing her slowly inside, and she'd never told Harry how she really felt before...

"I promised myself I would tell him... Tell him before I die..." Ginny whispered her thoughts aloud, watching the sun dip down below the line of the trees as the cool icy breath of the wind reached it's was through her opened window. A faint smile crossed her face as she surrendered to the moment - Forgetting all her troubles.

--

I follow the night

Can't stand the light

When will I begin

To live again

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One day I'll fly away

Leave all this to yesterday

What more could your love to for me

When will love be through with me

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Why leave live life from dream to dream

And dread the day when dreaming ends

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--

Harry walked down the thin wooden stairs, running his fingers down the sleek strong railing. He shivered until his pale slender feet brushed onto the rugged warmth of the maroon colored rug in the living room. His emerald eyes glittered as he willingly approached the blazing firelight, falling back onto the comfortable couch, his thoughts whirling.

"Couldn't sleep either?" Harry looked up, startled. "Oh! I'm sorry... I didn't mean to frighten you..."

"Oh no... Er... That's all right... And no, I couldn't sleep either." Harry watched as Ginny smiled a bit at him, blushing as well. His heart warmed at once, and he could feel his low spirits lifting with that simple gesture she had given him... Ginny shivered as a cold draft blew through the window behind her chair. Harry suddenly noticed she only wore one of her older brothers shirts and a pair of checkered shorts.

Blushing furiously he asked, "Do you... Want to come sit here? I mean if you're cold or something... You don't have too..."

"Of course," Ginny answered, and rose from the chair she had been occupying. Harry gulped despite this simple act as the girl he loved sat down next to him on the creaking couch. She smiled warmly at him, and then stared back at the fire. Harry watched her eyes without thinking, and noticed how sad and vulnerable they looked...

--

Never knew I could feel like this

Like I've never seen the sky before

Want to vanish inside your kiss

Every day I love you more and more

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Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing

Telling me to give you everything

Seasons may change winter to spring

But I love you, until the end of time

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--

Their eyes met in that moment, and both held the gaze with great difficulty. Harry couldn't tell what she was thinking... But the pain to let her know what his heart cried grew stronger and stronger with the passing minutes. Her deep thoughtful brown eyes bore into his - And he could almost feel her heart cry it's words out to him... Begging him to hear her pain... To help her... But Ginny turned away suddenly, as if sensing she had given away too much.

"I should really be getting some sleep... I promised mum I would help her with the cooking in the morning..." She stood up, making her way across the carpeted floor to the door at the far end of the room. Harry followed, taking hold of her hand quickly.

"Wait," he whispered. Ginny froze in mid - step, and he could feel her hold her breath. But the problem was... Harry didn't have the faintest idea what to say... What to say... Tell her how you feel, fool! His mind screamed like loud clanging bells.

"I... I just wanted you... For you to know that..." His voice grew quieter as he felt his face blush, and the embarrassment grow over his beating heart like a black plague. But when Ginny turned to face him, keeping the hold on his hand tight with hers, he could feel his strength coming back with a rush.

"I love you Ginny..." He almost whispered, but she caught it right away. Her mouth opened slightly with a mix of shock and... And panic? Harry's heart pounded through his chest as the seconds ticked by agonizingly.

"Harry... You... Can't..." He looked horrified for a moment, and pulled Ginny closer desperately to himself, thinking fast.

"Please say you still have feelings for me... I... I'm so sorry for what happened in school... I didn't know what I was thinking... You're so much different from them all... I love you... I need you Ginny... Your what's kept me alive all these years..." Harry stared with such a force into her eyes that she had to step back from him a little.

"You don't need me, Harry," she stated in a soft voice, letting her hand drop back to her side. Even in the darkness of the shadows Harry could see the pain and suffering she had been going through... And he wanted nothing more then to hold her... Whisper those reassuring words that she needed... Because by the looks of it, Colin had done nothing in her favor. What am I thinking? How do I know what Colin's done for her? I just love her too much to let her go again... Not again...

"I couldn't let you go again Ginny... Please... Say you feel as I do..." Harry hugged her slender body to his, feeling himself shake partly from the cold... And for another reason.

Ginny coughed, pushing herself quickly away from Harry. "Please..." She suddenly began gasping for air, and shuddering involuntarily as the burning sweat slid down her face once more. Harry had to catch her in his arms as she fainted without notice. His heart beat furiously in his chest as he set her on the couch.

"Oh my god... Are you alright Ginny? GINNY?!" Harry whispered to her desperately, feeling the tears slide down his flushed cheeks. His very heart shook with worry for the girl that lay in front of him on the couch.

"S-Sorry," Ginny sat up suddenly, blinking. Harry leapt to his feet in his relief, and hugged her tightly in his warm arms. She tensed, but he felt her relax after a moment and rest her head on his shoulder.

"I... Love you as well," she whispered. Harry could feel the tears threatening his eyes, but he forced himself to hold on to sanity. He was holding the girl he loved... And she loved him back... Ginny loved him... His heart beat faster in his excitement, and he just had to tell her... Tell her how much she meant to him... But before he could get the words out, she stood up quickly, making her way towards the stairs again.

"We can't though Harry... Colin..." His heart sank, and he knew the disappointment was written plainly across his face. Harry followed after her, grabbing her arm to begin to protest- But Ginny suddenly winced. Confused, he studied her long slender arm once more and gasped. A dark red mark had graced this girl's skin... And Harry could feel the hot anger rise up from his heart and into his throat as he struggled for words.

"He... He hit you...?" Ginny pulled her arm away quickly, and turned to face the wall. But Harry finally knew the truth, and he felt his temperature rise with the furious emotions, his emerald eyes glinting dangerously in the darkness.

"It's nothing... Really... Probably a mistake..."

"It was no mistake Ginny," he said turning her back toward him. She stared back into his eyes with such a helpless look; he could feel his anger slip away with the approaching morning light of the sun.

"We better get back to bed," Ginny whispered in Harry's ear, feeling his skin tingle a bit. She smiled, and walked back up the long wooden steps toward her bedroom. Harry stood at the bottom; absolutely oblivious to the sharp sunlight making it's way through the closed glass windows.

--

"Could we mum?" Ron asked through a mouthful of eggs as he attempted to stuff the rest of his toast down his throat before she noticed. Hermione's eyebrows rose in protest at her best friend's actions, but Harry merely laughed. It's funny the way you'd think those two simply hated each other, and the next moment, their stumbling over their words like their in love.

"I suppose so dear, but make sure you don't spend too much at Diagon Alley... You heard what your father said last night..." Molly Weasley bustled around the kitchen, mindlessly adding more eggs to Harry's plate- Even though he'd already had about 4 helpings of her wonderful breakfast.

Fred and George stumbled down into the kitchen, groggy smirks plastered onto their faces. Harry watched them sit down curiously.

"Yeah mum we heard dad last night- 'Now children' " Fred lowered his voice in an attempt to sound like his father. " 'We're going to start another budget in this house... And that means you won't be able to spend your saved money on something you wouldn't need...' "

"Like a Hogwarts toilet seat!" George exclaimed, which made Ron snort into his orange juice, and Harry laugh aloud with Hermione and Fred. But Mrs. Weasley didn't want to hear any of the twin's nonsense.

"Don't mock your father! He does enough work as it is to put food on the table for you all... And you two still haven't decided where to live once your store picks up it's prophets during the school year!" Fred and George stopped laughing. "Good, now go get ready for Diagon Alley... You'll have enough to buy a couple of things..."

--

Ginny made her way up to her room quietly, shadows following behind her as she slipped inside her room. The only problem was, someone was already inside it. She had to muffle a scream with her thin hand as the figure stepped into the light. Ginny sighed, feeling her heart beat rapidly.

"Where have you been, Ginny?" Colin asked softly, but she could hear the dangerous tint in his voice. Her hands shook nervously as she stepped forward. He won't hurt you this time... Don't worry... He's just asking a simple question...

"I... I was downstairs... Helping mum with the chores..."

"DON'T LIE TO ME!!" Colin slapped her across the face, and Ginny faced the wall feeling her cheek flush and throb with the sudden harsh contact. Her eyes watered with burning tears, her breathing becoming sharper.

"I know you were with Harry the whole day... I told you before to come to me... I know you still love him Ginny, and I want you to forget it... You know I could do anything to him... I could even have him killed..."

"Killed..." Ginny's voice faded, the words finally sinking in.

"Tell him you don't love him... Tell him to go away... Lie to him Ginny." Colin whispered in her ear, making her skin crawl. Light tears slid down her pale face, but she held her head high.

"I will... Tomorrow..."

--

Ginny yawned, sitting up in her bed the next morning. She felt a bit dizzy at the moment, but let the worried thoughts that flew through her mind pass for the moment. She could still feel the painful mark on her cheek from the night before... But she refused to think about it for a while. The glimmering sunlight trickled through her opened window, as she sat down at her desk to brush her curly flaming hair. Looking down at the papers lying in front of her, she suddenly realized she had to squint in order to see the words properly.

Just tired, she thought to herself reassuringly. But when she stood to find a pair of clothes, the sickening feeling swept over her pale body once more, sending her back onto her bed. Ginny could feel her heart pounding as the realization took over her mind, silencing her screaming thoughts. I... I must really be...

"Good morning Ginny!" Hermione said, stopping in front of her door. "You'd better get dressed... We're all planning to go down to Diagon Alley for some shopping! It'd be wonderful if you would come." Ginny blinked weakly, but nodded trying to smile despite her state. Hermione seemed assured, and kept walking down the hall past her door. 

Why does this have to happen to me, Ginny thought, her heart sinking. She had known all along what kind of sickness she had had- But just hadn't told anyone... To afraid to admit the painful truth...

The young girl stumbled, but found the energy to stand in front of her long glassy mirror. She touched her cold blue lips, her reflection doing the same. Her skin had paled considerably, and her figure had thinned out because of her lack of food. Her knees felt weak, and her hands shook as her cheeks began to flush, her temperature rising.

Ginny sat alone on her chair as it creaked under her weight. Just wait it out... Her head fell suddenly with a thump onto the wooden table, feeling her whole being grow weaker. Brown vibrant eyes dimming, skin flushing and growing damp, lips icy and blue... Her thoughts swam... She felt alone... She felt lost... Ginny didn't want to die, but sitting here in the darkened room... And with the sun slowly making it's way to the other side of the tall Burrow... It made her re-think her life the way it was... Was she meant to be taken from this earth? It felt so soon... But it was someone else's turn to live... And she had to give her life for it...

Taking a shuddering breath, Ginny stood up, the dizziness overtaking her slightly once again. Throwing on a skirt and top, she slipped her sandals delicately onto her icy feet. She walked downstairs, as if nothing had happened. But in her heart, she knew this would be her last day... Her last chance to let Harry know how much he meant to her... And how she wanted him to carry on... Carry on for her... For everyone...

--

The fireplace sparked and hissed with a violent green light after Ron had tossed in the Floo Powder. Hermione stood behind him, staring at the fire deep in thought as Ginny walked through the door and into the cluttered living room with them. Harry smiled warmly, not noticing the weak state she was in.

"Coming too, Ginny?"

"Yes... Of course... But could I speak to you for a moment?" He could hear her voice shake for some odd reason, and he suddenly noticed Colin leaning against the opposite wall behind them, smirking mysteriously.

"Alright... When we get to Diagon Alley we'll talk..." With a last look at his only love, Harry crossed the room to the fireplace and stepped inward, feeling the sudden familiar warmth of the magical firelight.

"DIAGON ALLEY!" he yelled, a familiar spinning sensation overtaking him. Almost loosing his balance, Harry stumbled out into a small dusty looking shop. An old man with white, wild hair looked up quickly from the quill that sat writing by itself on the desk, a smile spreading across his face.

"Well, well, Mr. Potter! How nice to see you again!" Mr. Ollivander exclaimed, seeming excited. "Holly and phoenix feather, eleven inches, nice and supple- Am I correct?" Harry nodded mildly, feeling the sudden urge to see Ginny again.

"It was nice seeing you again Mr. Ollivander, but I best be off," and before the tall, white haired man could protest, Harry was out the door and on the all to familiar cobble-stone streets of Diagon Alley.

"Got lost again, eh?" the redheaded boy next to him commented, a smirk crossing his face. Harry looked at him, also amused.

"Not as far as the last time..."

Ginny stood off to the side, looking a bit scared... Harry made his way over to her slowly, Ron and Hermione getting the hint, moving into the nearest shop.

"Is something wrong...?" Harry felt a sudden sick feeling in his heart, but he pushed it aside for the time being.

"Yes... I... I apologize."

"Apologize?"

"Yes... For... For leading you to believe that I loved you all this time." Harry stared blankly into her brown beautiful eyes for a long while, the sinking feeling returning, with the first cold stab of jealousy.

"You... You don't... Love me?" Ginny turned quickly to hide her emotions, and shook her head in no. Tears burned his eyes as he felt the doubt and pain fill his heart for the first real time in his life.

"Harry! Ginny! Come over here, we're going to buy some sundaes!"

The day had passed quickly, and the suffering inside would not cease inside of him. Many different views on what happened kept screaming at his mind, interrupting his thoughts. Whenever he'd look her way, she would only turn quickly in spite of herself, and her state of sickness, although Harry could not see it. He tried to pull himself together as best he could, but nothing seemed to work. At last the sun began to sink below the line of the trees, as the stars could become seen above in the sky.

"We should really be getting back now," Hermione stated knowingly, so the four of them began to walk back towards the Leaky Cauldron to go back home.

But Harry didn't want to go home. He didn't want to go anywhere. He wanted to be with Ginny once again... Be able to hold her...

--

Ginny followed, feeling her body weaken with the approaching darkness that fell upon the small group of friends like a plague. She began breathing harder, but struggled to keep quiet as to not frighten the three that crowded over by the fireplace. Ron had disappeared already, and so had Hermione along after him. But Harry stood still, watching Ginny teeter on the spot dizzily.

She suddenly fell forward, but Harry caught her nervously, kneeling down on the wooden floor, holding her tightly in his arms. Ginny noticed his emerald eyes glaze over, and his face take on a terrified look of pain and protest. Her temperature rose once more, and she shivered as she felt her cheeks flush- The cold sweat sliding down her pale face, streaking her eyes to mix with her tears.

It's my time... She thought suddenly, feeling the weakness engulf her body. I must leave him... Leave everyone behind...

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--

"Ginny... Ginny... SOMEBODY GET HELP!" Harry cried hoarsely, not looking away from her dimming brown eyes. The stout-looking bartender ran for a phone as a group of people looked over curiously. Harry could feel his heart pound furiously against his chest, willing himself to believe that Ginny would be all right... She would never die... She would never leave his side... 

"Harry..." Ginny whispered faintly, her lips chapped and blue. He held his breath, resting one hand behind her back to hold her thin light body upward, and his other behind her head to look into her deep misty eyes. "I'm... dying..." The struggle to get the words out was immense, but when they sank in, burning tears began to slide down his face.

"No... N-No... You're not... You'll be fine..." 

"You have... To go... on..." Harry began breathing heavily, the tears beginning to come more hard and painful. He took a rattling breath in, trying to clear his mind. But nothing would come... Nothing. 

"Please... Stay with me..."

"I... Love you Harry..." Ginny whispered, her breath becoming scarce. Harry had to lean in to hear her last words, but the two knew exactly what the other was thinking, just by looking into their eyes.

"I love you too," was all Harry could say. A faint smile crossed her lips then, and she closed her eyes for the final time. He could feel the pain and remorse cloud his vision and mind... And he sobbed, hugging the lifeless body of his only love close to him... For hours Harry sat there on the cold wooden ground of the bar, hugging the unmoving figure of Ginny in his arms. Sobs racked his lungs as he gasped for air, dark circles deepening under his eyes. He bent down in his sorrow, pressing his lips against hers in a last attempt to feel her love with his...

Long after the help had come only moments too late, after the friends and family had reached the scene, and hours after that... Harry just wouldn't let Ginny go... He wouldn't let anyone touch her, hold her, or even go near her. He just sat in the same spot, crying until he couldn't breathe... Until he couldn't think...

--

Harry sat up in bed countless times because of Ginny's death. As much as his friends wanted to talk to him... Cheer him up... Nothing worked. The only healing he found was in his writing... In which he became a well-known writer, for the story he wrote entitled: Forever. It was a story about truth and beauty... A novel of confusions and passions... But most of all... It was about love.

The last line, in his book was: The greatest thing... You'll ever learn... Is just to love... And be loved, in return.

.Fin.