Life Without Ron

A Life Without Ron

It was a dark and stormy nightmare...
Dream, in SANDMAN #2: "Imperfect Hosts"

I remember that night vividly; You were right in front of me acting as my human shield - as you have always done. I cried out to you, but you would not heed my voice. Hermione told you to get out but you did not move a muscle. You stood your ground, between me and my death, and you fell, and I had to watch you die. Falling to the ground, like the falling of timber after greedy hands cut it. Like everyone else that mattered to me, you fell to save my life. I was able to continue what I set out to do, even when the roads were blocked, and the bridges fell, and the monster attacked, because you were there. I was able to come home alive, in one piece, honored and exalted. I was able to bring your body home.
How ironic.
How unreal.
How unfair.
I know I must accept the fate that has been laid before me with gratitude for had it not been for your sacrifice, I would be the one inside that white marble casket that they are slowly lowering to the ground. Ginny would be crying over my grave, not yours. Hermione will write my life. I will not be forgotten, in fact, I will be remembered often as the One that ended the Dark Lord's reign, and there will be songs about me, and tales told near the hearth, and children will hush when the old ones begin the story.
However, you made the sacrifice, and your broken body is inside the white casket that they are covering with earth. Ginny is crying because you're gone. Hermione will never love again. The stories that they'd tell would vary and no one would even care to know the truth. There will be no songs save one; filled with grief and lamentations, no doubt the only one Hermione's lips would sing. She'd write you a sonnet. A short one for her tears would keep getting in the way.
I will remember you everyday when I wake up. Haven't I told you before? You remind me of sunshine, and of fun summers in the Burrow. You remind me of sweets shared in the compartment of the Hogwarts Express, and of adventures in the castle while Filch search with his cat. I will never forget the day we met; you were standing there, looking kind, and I knew I have found a friend. The only time we ever fought was over the goblet...do you remember? I will never understand why you were jealous when I was the one who envied you since we met. I still envy you.
You will be the last thought in my head before I sleep. Remembering the games, the many, many games we played in the common room, or in our bedroom every night for seven years. Remember when Seamus swallowed the beetle? Remember how he turned red, then purple, then green? Remember when he threw up on your bed and I had to hide your sheets for days because we could not remember the spell for cleaning? Remember how we forced Dean to dress as a girl because he lost in Wizards poker? Or the time when you lost and you had to kiss me---I never told you before, but that was a good kiss, one that I will never forget. Never.
I must go on. Even if every day would be like walking under your shadow. Even when my life would be in chaos within---like a dark and stormy nightmare that no one except me would see and feel. I must go on because you told me to, because you gave me a chance...
I must go on.
I must...