Not Myself

Suppose I said

I am on my best behavior

And there are times

I lose my worried mind?

Would you want me when

I’m not myself?

Wait it out while I am somebody else?

Suppose I said

Colors change for no good reason

And words will go

From poetry to prose

Would you want me when

I’m not myself?

Wait it out while I am somebody else?

And I, in time, will come around

I always do for you

Suppose I said

You’re my saving grace

- John Mayer “Not Myself”

Not Myself by Saerry Snape

Chapter 13 – The Forbidden Forest

 Harry and Niamh were eating a late breakfast at the Slytherin table when two owls flew into the Hall, one heading for them and the other for Hermione.  As the owl landed on the table in front of them, Niamh winced visibly while Harry untied the letter from the owl, which flew off a moment later.  Unrolling it, he held it so Niamh could read it at the same time.

Your detention shall be served at 8 o’ clock.  Meet Mr. Filch in the entrance hall.

M. McGonagall

“I have a feeling this is not going to be fun.”

Harry laughed harshly and said, “O’ course its na, Ni.  It’s detention.”

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“You guys too?”

Harry and Niamh nodded as they met up with Ron and Hermione outside the Great Hall.

“Man,” said Ron, “I wonder what you guys are doing.”

Harry shrugged then said, “Whatever it is, i’ won’t be good.  I c’n tell ye tha’.”

“And you know what’s worse?” prompted Niamh.

“What?”

“We have to serve it with Malfoy.”

“Malfoy?  So he got caught?”

“Tried ter get us caught too.”

“So, who caught you guys?” asked Ron bewilderedly.

“Filch,” said Harry, Hermione, and Niamh at the same time.

“Harry got Mrs. Norris to go away though.”

Ron looked at his friend in amazement for a moment then said, “Remind me to take you if we go exploring through the school.”

Harry groaned then said, “C’mon, Ni.  Potions.”

“Ah, joyful day.  I get to see Malfoy, once again.  And then again after that.  And again.  And again.  Isn’t it such a joy to be in the same House as him?”

“Yeh.  Joyful,” replied Harry, completely deadpan.

“I’m being sarcastic here, Harry.”

“So’m I.”

Niamh rolled her eyes then said, “Come along, my friends.  We have a Potions class to get to!”

“How can you be so cheerful?” groaned Ron.

“As a Slytherin, I don’t get yelled at by Professor Snape.  However…”

“We do ge’ yelled a’ by other teachers,” finished Harry.

Niamh whacked the back of his head and cried, “Don’t finish my sentences!”

“Oh, sod off.”

“Harry!” shrieked Hermione.

Harry half-smiled at her and said, “Sorry.  Ye hear things on the stree’s, y’know.”

“Like what,” asked Ron, receiving a whack in the back of the head by Hermione.

“Ow!”

“You don’t need to know, Ron!”

“Well, no need to hit me.”

“Humphf.”

Harry glared at them and said disgruntledly, “C’mon, ye two.  Ye want ter be late?”  Ron and Hermione shook their heads and they were off.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

At 8 o’ clock sharp, Harry and Niamh made their way up to the entrance hall from the dungeons.  When they arrived, Hermione, Draco, and Filch were already there.  Filch gave them all a piercing look then led them outside.

“You’ll be serving detention with Hagrid tonight.”

Niamh and Hermione looked at each other.  Harry, on the other hand, was occupied with trying not to sneer at Draco.

Suddenly, Hagrid’s hut loomed up out of the dark, and with it, Hagrid himself.  He looked at them and said, “Yer four?”

Filch said, “Yes, these four.  I’ll be back to collect them.”  He laughed harshly and added, “What’s left of them, that is?”  With that he vanished into the dark, Niamh looking after him in surprise.

Hermione turned to Hagrid and asked, “What was that about?”

Hagrid replied, “We’ve got ter go inter the Forest.  There’s been a unicorn hurt bad by summat.  An’ you four are going ter help me look.”

Draco cried, “The Forest!  We can’t go in there!  There’s…..werewolves!”

Harry smirked and said, “Doan tell me yer scared, Malfoy.”

Draco turned on him in a flash, a look of haughty arrogance replacing the fear of earlier.

“I’m not scared, Potter.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” muttered Niamh.

Draco glared at her and would have started forward but Hagrid said, “Alrigh’.  Let’s go.”

And so they plunged into the forest, following along behind Hagrid and Fang, their wands lit and held high above their heads as their eyes watched the dark trees around them.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“Alrigh’, Hermione, Malfoy, you come with me.  Niamh, Harry, you take Fang.”

Harry and Niamh nodded and started off, the big black boarhound following them.  Hagrid’s booming voice called after them, “An’ stay on the trail!”

Niamh waved in acknowledgement and then Hagrid, Hermione, and Draco vanished in the gray mist that drifted through the forest.

“Okay,” said Harry.  “We’re looking fer an injured unicorn.  Simple enough.”

Niamh shook her head at him and said, “Aren’t you ever worried?”

“Na, really.  Why?”

“I don’t know.  You always seem so…unafraid.”

“Owe i‘ to eleven years on the streets.  Oi, look.”

Harry pointed at a spot on the ground and Niamh knelt down to look at it, holding her wand close.  She looked up at him and said, “Unicorn blood.”  Slowly, she reached out a touched the silver substance.

“It’s still warm.”

Harry nodded and lifted his wand high, eyes scanning the shadows around them.  He said, “We’re close then.  C’mon.”

Niamh nodded and rose to her feet and they continued on.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“I wish we had Jardin.  He could fly ahead and look.”

Harry shook his head.  “Na.  Jardin could’n see out here any better than we c’n.”

“Good point.  Hey, Fang, what’s wrong?”

The big boarhound had been walking in front of them during the entire time they had been talking, his nose to the ground.  Now he was backing up, whimpering.  Niamh tried to console the dog as Harry moved forward and peered around a large tree.

“Ni…”

“What…  oh my God…”

The unicorn lay before them, legs splayed out, showing a clear, pearly white against the dark ground.  The magnificent head was thrown back, as though it had been fighting even as it fell.  And by its neck, head bent low, was a figure shrouded in a dark cloak.

Fang let out a howl and ran.  The figure’s head snapped up and Harry could see silver blood dripping from what looked like gleaming fangs.  Beside him, Niamh convulsed and fell to the ground, emptying the contents of her stomach as she went.  Harry threw himself in front of her, drawing his wand in a futile attempt to protect his friend.  The creature drew closer and with it came a sharp pain in Harry’s scar.  He focused around it as best he could but as the figure came nearer, he could no longer.  Collapsing onto the ground in front of Niamh, he kept her behind him.  If this creature was going to kill them, it’d have to take him before it took his friend.

Harry could feel the harsh breathe of it on his face, his scar pounding so loudly he almost fell unconscious.  Then…

There was a thunder of hooves and something sailed overhead.  The hooded figure weaved back as the black shape reared up, fore-hooves flailing wildly.  A light shone in the dark and Harry’s head cleared.  When he looked, the figure was gone.

And in its place was another unicorn, black as pitch with small dashes of gray in its otherwise unmarked coat.  Its horn was crooked yet smooth as glass, reflecting the light from Niamh’s wand, which she still clutched in her hand.  The unicorn moved towards them, eyes glittering with intelligence.  Harry had read that unicorns preferred girls to boys but those were normal unicorns.  This one was obviously a Darcorn, said to be evil.  Harry reached out a tentative hand and brushed his long fingers against the velvet-soft muzzle.  He smiled and whispered, “Thank you.”  The unicorn seemed to smile with its eyes and nickered softly, nipping his fingers gently, before turning and vanishing into the darkness of the forest.  Harry looked after it in awe then turned to Niamh.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“Harry!  What happened!”

Hermione ran forward as she saw them, still sitting on the ground where they had fallen.  Behind her came Fang, Hagrid, and Draco.  The older man spotted the dead unicorn and let out a sigh.  Then he asked, “Ye alright, Harry?”

Harry nodded and said, “Yeh.  I doan know about Ni, though.”

“Well let’s get ‘er up ter the castle.  C’mon, you lot.”

Harry and Hermione helped Niamh to her feet and started to walk with her but gave that up when Niamh’s knees buckled and she slipped in their grasp.  Hagrid handed his lantern to Harry then swept Niamh up into his arms, lumbering off.  Harry, Hermione, and Draco drifted after him, Harry’s thoughts lingering in the forest.

With the Darcorn.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

Severus sighed as he collapsed into a chair in his rooms, his right hand lingering on a spot on his left arm.  He looked at the fire, absently rubbing his thumb over a certain spot.

I was sure it tingled, he thought, turning his gaze from the fire to his arm.  Underneath his pale skin he could see it, a shade of silver-gray.  Lying.  Waiting.  Waiting for its master to come and reawaken it, to sound out the call once more.

Severus shivered.

He hoped it would never come to that.  He hoped the call would never pull at him again.

For his sake.

And for Harry’s.

A/N: A 100 points if you can guess the significance of the Darcorn.

Chapter 14 – The Truth is Out There

“You’re joking.”

“Na!”

“Harry, please, tell me your joking.”

“Ni, I’m na joking.  It was him!  Voldemort!”

Ron winced and said, “Don’t say the name!”

Hermione asked, “How do you know, Harry?”

Harry gave an exasperated sigh and asked, “Well, who else who i’ be?  ‘E’s the one who gave me this scar.  It ‘ad ter ‘ave been him.”

“Your sure about this?”

“Yeh!”

Niamh frowned and looked at Ron and Hermione.  “But why would he be in the forest?”

“Unicorn blood c’n save ye, even if yer an inch from death.”

“Harry, how do you know these things.”

“I read, Ni.  Now look.  Professor Dumbledore tol’ me Voldemort (“Stop saying the name,” hissed Ron) vanished after ‘e killed me parents.  ‘E did’na say ‘e’d died.  So, whose ter say that was’n him out there?”

Niamh sighed, “Harry…”

“Oh, c’mon, Ni.  Me scar!  I think i’ connects me an’ ‘im.”

“Why do you think that?” asked Hermione.

“Because no one else ‘as ever made my scar hurt as badly as i’ did in the forest.  It’s him.  I know i’.”

“So,” said Hermione, “what’s he doing here?”

Ron and Niamh both looked at Harry, who was staring off into space.

“Goo’ question.  What would ‘e be doin’ here?”

 

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

A few days later Harry and Niamh were in Defense Against the Dark Arts, listening to Quirrell go on an on about….something.  They hadn’t been listening for a while.  In fact, they had been talking.

“Has your scar been hurting anymore, Harry?”

“Na.  I’d’ve told ye if i’ had.”

“Really?”

“Yeh, Ni.  Yer me friend.  Why would I ‘ide something’ like tha’ from you?”

Niamh smiled.

“I’m glad you think of me as a friend, Harry.”

“Yer welcome.  Ow!”

“Harry, what’s…Oh…”

Harry hissed in pain and clapped a hand over his scar.  No one else in the room noticed, too busy either copying down notes or talking amongst themselves.  Harry looked up and saw Quirrell turned around, his back towards them.  His eyes locked on the back of his head and a flash of pain similar to the one he had gotten in the forest shot through his head.  He hissed again and ducked down.  The pain in his scar slowly ebbed away but he wasn’t paying attention to that anymore.  He was putting two and two together.

A hand fell on his shoulder and he jumped, jerking his head up.  Niamh looked at him with wide eyes and whispered, “Harry, what’s wrong?”

Harry looked at Quirrell’s still turned back, keeping his eyes away from the back of his head.  A cold smile twisted his lips as he replied, “I figured i’ out, Ni.”

“What?”

“Why Voldemort is ‘ere.”

Niamh gasped then they both quickly picked up their quills and Quirrell turned back around.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

The next day being Saturday, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Niamh all met in an empty classroom.  Harry cast a Sound Proof Charm on the room then turned back to his three friends.

Ron asked, “So, what’s with all the secrecy, Harry?”

“I figured i’ out.”

“What?” asked Hermione.

“Why Voldemort is ‘ere.”

Ron and Hermione gaped.  Harry smiled weakly at them then began to speak.

“Alrigh’, if Voldemort is ‘ere, wha’ would ‘e naturally do?”

Ron frowned but Hermione only took a moment to think of it.

“He’d go after you.”

“Exactly!  An’ who ‘as done tha’?”

Ron frowned some more then said, “Snape?”

Harry and Niamh scowled at him and he gulped then said in a shaking voice, “Q-Q-Quirrell?”

“Excellen’ impersenat’n.  Yeh, Quirrell.  ‘E tried ter kill me a’ the match.”

“But,” said Hermione, “what does You-Know-Who have to do with Professor Quirrell.”

Harry sighed and said, “Quirrell is Voldemort.”

“What!!” said both Ron and Hermione.

“In Defense yesterday, Quirrell turned ‘round and I ‘ad pain in me scar again.  An’ there’s on’y pain in me scar when….”

“…You – Voldemort is around,” finished Niamh, faltering for a moment when Harry glared at her.

“So, your saying You-Know-Who is Quirrell?  How can that be?”

Harry sighed and shrugged.

“I doan know.  But, I do know one t’ing.  If Voldemort was drinkin’ unicorn blood ter stay alive, e’s lookin’ fer somethin’ else.  Somethin’ that’ll keep ‘im alive longer.”  He gave Hermione a pointed look as he said this.

“Oh!  The Stone!  That’s it, isn’t it?”

Harry nodded.

“The Stone.  The Elixir of Life.  ‘E wants it.”

“Shouldn’t we tell Dumbledore?” asked Ron.

“Goo’ idea.”

“Hold on.”

The three of them looked at Niamh, who was frowning.

“What?” asked Ron.

“Hermione, you told me that Hagrid had gotten that dragon egg from a stranger in a pub.”

“Yes.”

“So, what sort of stranger carries around dragon eggs in their pockets?  And just so happens to give it to Hagrid who – if you remember our time with him, Herm – wants nothing else in the world but a dragon.”

It took a moment for her words to sink in then they all went, “Oh.”

Harry quickly said, “Ni, Herm, Ron, ye go ask ‘Agrid about tha’ dragon egg.”

“Where are you going?” asked Ron as Harry turned and took the Sound Proof Charm off the room then ran out the door.

Niamh yelled after him, “Where are you going!”

“Ter talk ter McGonagall!!”

“Why?”

“Jus’ go talk ter ‘Agrid, fool!”

Niamh frowned then grabbed Ron and Hermione’s arms and growled, “Let’s go.”

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

Harry flew down the halls, ducking past other students and even running down little Professor Flitwick, who he paused to help back up.  When he finally got to McGonagall’s office, he was panting slightly, but not enough to hamper his voice.

“Professor!”

McGonagall looked up from whatever she was doing at her desk and said, “Mr. Potter.  Is there a problem?”

“I need ter see Professor Dumbledore.”

“Professor Dumbledore is away.  He received an urgent owl from the Ministry of Magic.”

Harry gasped, “Gone?  Now?  I need ter talk ter ‘im!”

McGonagall frowned and said, “Professor Dumbledore has other things to do other than run this school, Mr. Potter.  Nothing could possibly be more important that the Ministry.”

“But this is abou’ the Sorcerer’s Stone!”

“What?  How do you know about the Stone?”

“Nevermin’ tha’!  Someone’s goin’ ter steal i’!”

McGonagall frowned again and snapped, “I don’t know how you found out about the Stone, Mr. Potter, but I assure you, it is very well protected.  Now, return to your dormitory.”

“Professor…”

“Now, Mr. Potter.”

Harry sighed and left the room, kicking the wall and hissing an acid curse as he walked on.

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“Well?”

“She did’n believe me.  An’ Dumbledore’s gone!”

“Gone?”

“Ministry business.  What did ye find out from ‘Agrid?”

“You were right,” said Niamh.

Hermione nodded and said, “He got it from a stranger in a pub.  And talked to him about Fluffy.”

“Fluffy?” gasped Harry.

“The three-headed dog.”

“Tha’ thing is called Fluffy?”

“Apparently.  Anyway, Hagrid was talking to us and then he let it slip how to get past Fluffy.”

“Ter the trap door.”

“Yes.  And if he told us…”

Harry gaped at Hermione.  “’E probably told the stranger in the pub.”

“Exactly.”

“Damn.  Tha’ must’ve been Quirrell.”

“So, now what?” asked Ron.

“We go down the trap door,” said Harry.  “Tonigh’.”

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

“Ow!  Get off my foot!”

“Sorry, Herm.”

“Will the both o’ ye shut up?  I’m na in the ter ge’ caugh’ by Filch again.”

“Sorry, Harry.”

“Yeah, sorry.”

Harry sighed and the four of them crept forward under the invisibility cloak.

< Harry. >

Harry jumped in surprise then hissed, Don’t do that, Jardin!

< Sorry. >

Nevermind.  Filch anywhere in sight?

A pause then…..

< No.  Mrs. Norris is wandering about up here but nothing else. >

Norri?  Did she see you?

< Possibly.  But she didn’t run for Filch. >

Must’ve smelled me on you.

< Pardon? >

Nevermind.  Just keep an eye out for Filch, Jar.

< I will. >

Ron whispered, “What’d he say?”

Harry replied, “’E said Filch is nowhere in sigh’.  We’re safe.”  He had only told Ron and Hermione about Jardin’s rather special ability of speech just before they had set off.  Hermione had believed him, having read about the type of bird Jardin was, but Ron had only believed after Jardin had talked to him in a rather snappy way that had reminded Harry of Snape.

They crept on down the hallways until they finally came to the entrance to the third floor corridor, shedding the invisibility cloak.  Harry tucked it into a hidden alcove then straightened, allowing Jardin to take up his perch on his shoulder.  Looking at his friends, he said, “Le’s go.”

Ron pulled the door open and they all slipped inside.