Towel!Seamus

Seamus Finnigan had never been in such a predicament before. The night before he had gotten the password to the prefect's bathroom from Justin Finch-Fletchley and had, this morning, decided to take a nice relaxing bath. It was short lived when Peeves decided to come in and steal his clothes and then threatened to start yelling if he did not get out. Now, dripping wet and wearing only a towel, he crept along the corridor, hoping against hope not to be spotted by anyone.

At least it's so early hardly anyone will be up. I should be able to get back to my dormitory unnoticed.

Seamus crept around the corners and up several flights of stairs as stealthily as possible.

~~~

"I hate the bloody sunlight! Why does it decide to wake me up at this ungodly hour?"

Blaise Zabini sat up in her bed ranting as a very dull light seeped in. Of course, how it seeped in was a mystery to her. After all, her dormitory was in the dungeons!

"Shut up Blaise," groaned Pansy Parkinson from a bed across the room. "Some of us can actually sleep through it if you would keep quiet."

Millicent Bulstrode grunted; which Blaise supposed was an agreement with Pansy. The other two girls were still soundly asleep.

Normally Blaise would not even consider complying with someone else's request but this morning it was hideously cold and she decided to roam the school. Perhaps she would find something interesting to do.

After dressing quickly, she exited the Slytherin common room and then went out into the dungeons. Making her way up to the ground-level floor, she decided to wander up a few of the staircases until she could go to the Great Hall for breakfast.

"I do not think that such action is necessary, Professor Snape."

Blaise cringed at that voice. It was McGonagall.

Lovely, first, the bloody sunlight wakes me up, then it's freezing cold, and now that old bat McGonagall is just around the corner.

Even if McGonagall was talking to her own head of house that did not erase the fact that she was no favourite of the Gryffindor head. Blaise thought it best not be caught at all by then and quickly darted up the nearest staircase.

~~~

"That boy has melted through several cauldrons already! I insist he be moved back a year or two!"

Seamus panicked when he heard the voice of his greasy-haired potion's master.

Oh God. There is not a snowball's chance in hell I'll let him catch me like this! I can just imagine his sneer and the look on his face...ugh he'll probably take bloody points away from Gryffindor for "public nudity" even though I AM covered...

Seamus spied a set of stairs and bolted up them. Anything to get away from the voices that were coming closer.

Just as soon as he had paused on the landing, something slammed into the back of him and he franticly groped at his towel to keep it in place as he was jolted slightly forced.

"Bloody hell! Watch where in the damn you're going!" he spouted without really paying attention as to whom he was yelling at.

Seamus turned around to see Blaise staring at him. Oh my God...and I thought running into Snape was bad. Seamus and Blaise had had several run-ins before...most of which resulted in some kind of snog or another. But they were not, and probably never would be, on civil terms.

"Holy shit, you're naked under that!"

"Well spotted Blaise," he rolled his eyes. "I suppose you're naked under your clothes..."

"Yes, yes I am." She laughed at him. "But you're...I'm not even going ask why you are dressed like that. I could do without anymore mental scarring."

Seamus snorted. "I'm hardly dressed, but I suppose to you I look as if I'm in formal wear."

"Not qui-- whoa, please pull up the towel because things are about to be revealed that I'd rather not see."

Seamus smirked and did not touch the towel. He for one knew that it was not going anywhere; it was safely snug around his hips.

"Then why in the world are you staring at me like that?"

"Like what? I may not be entirely innocent, but I have not seen many..." Blaise paused to clear her throat, "before... and I certainly don't want yours to be added to the list." She looked him square in the eyes.

Seamus crossed his arms and answered almost lazily,

"You have a very predatory look in your eyes."

"Why would I be looking at you like that?"

"That's why I'm asking," he answered, giving her a very pointed look with his ice blue eyes.

"Because I'm cannibalistic," said Blaise, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

"Ah, I see. If you ask me I'd say you are irritating for looking at a Gryffindor in the manner that you are."

"I didn't ask you. Anyway, I really am cannibalistic so you better watch out or I'll eat you alive."

Seamus gave her a very sly smirk before saying, "I'm taking that as a metaphor."

"It's not." Blaise stared at him thinking, He's even dirtier than I am!

"You keep telling yourself that." Seamus ran a hand through his sandy brown hair as he stood there.

"Right, well you're the one who thought of it like that. Maybe you want it to be a metaphor."

"Trying to save face, are we?" Seamus snickered.

"You're trying to embarrass me," she stated with a shake of her head, "I don't embarrass easily."

"I'm not. I'm merely pointing out that I've caught you lusting after me."

"It's not like I've never caught you lusting after me."

"Oh please, don't delude yourself. Has it not occurred to you that some things end up unrequited?"

Blaise laughed dryly. "Oh believe me, it has. But there are some things that can't be denied. Although, we both know that you're a master at denial."

"Honestly," began Seamus with a roll of his eyes. "Please do not assume you know what I'm like. I'm not in denial and never really am. I just happen to tell white lies often...which always have just enough truth in them."

"Then don't you dare assume what I'm like. The only thing you know about me is that I'm a bitch and despise mushiness," Blaise paused then added as an afterthought, "If that is even a word."

"I would never presume that I did. In fact," Seamus crossed his arms, "I consider myself lucky that I do not."

"Your actions contradict your words. You may be more of an ass than your soppy little friends and possibly a bit more easy to talk to, but I was wrong in thinking that you were any different."

Seamus smirked smugly. "You're always wrong when it comes to me. Case in point from yesterday and by your own admission now."

Blaise rolled her eyes at him. "Why am I even having this conversation? It's pointless and tedious!" Blaise started walking up the stairs in long, irritated strides. Seamus calmly followed her.

"Oh I don't know...maybe because you enjoy it? Although you wouldn't admit that."

"No," she paused and turned around to face him. "Do you want the bloody truth? I enjoy most of our conversations--if they could even be called that. But this one...is stupid and annoying and obnoxious. Not that I'm surprised...after all those are all the qualities that you embody."

"Right...and weren't we just talking about people in denial?"

"Denial? Me? I don't think so. That is probably one of the first truthful things I've said in God knows how long. Now please excuse me while I try to find someone to talk to that isn't you!" Blaise storms up the next set of stairs.

Seamus shakes his head and continues to follow her.

"You know what, your extremely moody today. You've lost the cool that you normally possess. Hmm, I'd say that I've spotted P.M.S."

Blaise stared at him and her face lit up in a mock-enthusiasm.

"Hey, why don't we share secrets and exchange sanitary napkins? I have the purple-wrapped kind, which do you have?" She rolled her eyes. "You're about to get kicked again, I hope you realise that."

"I'm sure you're just shaking with delight at the thought of coming in contact with my 'wand' again."

"Oh? I didn't know you even had one."

"Of course, that's exactly why your eyes keep drifting below my hips."

"I'm merely determining where my shot should best be aimed. I do have my wand -no metaphor- and I will body bind only certain parts of your body. Mainly your jaw and little soldier."

"I see you enjoy coming up with pet names for it!" exclaimed Seamus with a snort.

"Yes I do. I just jot them down whenever I'm not having sex with every male in my house..." she shook her head in mock-sorrow, "How ever do I find the time for it?"

"You're a bloody walking contradiction. Just the other day you tell me you're a bloody virgin and now you're a Slytherin whore. Although, I suppose that's a recent development...lack of sex with me must have driven you to it."

"Ever heard of sarcasm you big dolt? I swear to God, even Goyle's brighter than you are and he has the intelligence of a Muggle crayon!"

"Of course I have. But it's hard to tell the difference with you..." Seamus paused then asked, "By the way is there any reason you're following me?"

"Me, following you? Every time I walk up the bloody stairs, you stalk after me. So I should be the one asking you that question."

"True, but I'm heading to Gryffindor Tower, which happens to be this way...I see no reason for you to be heading in this direction."

"Well, I don't feel obligated to tell you my reason. Nor should I have known you were headed to Gryffindor Tower, let alone that it's in this direction."

"You're denser that I thought!" Seamus shook his sandy head. "Honestly, me walking around in a towel...does that not merit reason for you to figure out where I was headed?"

Blaise looked at him with a very irritated and annoyed glance before reaching her hand into the pockets of her Slytherin school robes. Seamus eyes widened when she brandished her wand.

"Accio bath towel!" Blaise quickly turned around and began to walk off. Seamus gasped and frantically tried to cover himself with his hands.

"BLAISE! You give me that fucking towel back right this damn instant!"

Blaise continued to ignore him and kept on walking. She had a smirk plastered on her face that Seamus could not see.

"Blaise..." Seamus' voice had lost it's edge and was boarding on panic. His face was flushed red and he continued to stand there like a fool. "Please give me my towel back!" He paused to think for a moment, "Look, I'll buy it from you."

Blaise stopped but did not turn around.

"I don't want money."

"Fine, what do you want?"

"To keep the towel. Being the cause of humiliation brings me great joy."

A number of obscene things that Seamus could say to her crossed his mind. But saying them, he realised, would hamper his predicament more than anything.

"Is there any way I can get my towel back?"

"None that I can think of."

"Fine then," Seamus fumed, his frustration and anger rising. "You can forget about ever snogging me again. A loss for you I'm sure...I bet I was the best you ever had." Seamus turned around, straight backed, and started to walk up the remaining stairs.

"I wasn't planning on it!" Blaise shouted back at him.

"You know, I could just feel the tension during this entire episode. I'm absolutely positive you just wanted to throw your hands up and snog me."

"No, I really didn't. It's time for you to accept the fact that you're not as great as you obviously think you are. Arrogance is fine...if it's true. But in your case it is most certainly not."

Seamus paused for a moment to think about that before saying.

"Well, if I wasn't as great as I think I am I would not be getting away with snogging three different girls and escape all their fury plus jealous boyfriends with all my hairs in place. In fact, they all but kissed and made up with me."

Blaise made a very odd sound which sounded like a cross being a gurgle and a gag.

"Kissed and made up?" Her facial expression said she was clearly disgusted. "Holy bloody crap. I cannot believe I ever snogged you in the first place. Maybe Turpin was smart in suicide attempts."

"If you want to commit suicide go right ahead...it's not as if anyone would miss you anyway!" As soon as the words came out of his mouth, he felt a pang of intense regret. That was low...not even Slytheirns went that low.

Blaise paused for a while, and heard Seamus start to say something. "Shut up Finnigan!" she snapped, "I don't want to hear to you talk."

"Ah, the tables have turned have they? Let me see...didn't we have this conversation yesterday? But yesterday I was the one telling you to shut up," Seamus answered, ignoring the guilt he was feeling.

"I have to ask myself again, why am I even listening to you? Now, I'm going to walk away and if you say one more word to me I will use that useful body bind spell and throw you down the stairs."

Seamus opened his mouth to say something but shut it. The gleam in her eyes told him she was deadly serious. Mustering as much dignity as he could he walked away still covering himself with his hands.

Blaise watched him go and then made her way back to the Slytherin common room, fury running through her veins. As soon as she made it there, she threw the towel down on top of Malcolm Baddock who was dozing on a couch. Blaise stormed up to the 5^th year girl's dormitory and flung the lid of her trunk open, ignoring Pansy's demands that she stop making so much noise. She yanked out a small book and fell onto her bed, opened it, and began to scribble furiously.

Seamus Finnigan is a bloody asshole and he deserves to be castrated. He's even crueler than I am, and that's saying something hideously drastic. I walked up the stairs, only to find him stark naked, save for a towel. I was being a bitch, he was being a jerk, blah blah blah, we've all heard that part of the story a million times. However, I was NOT controlling the conversation, and I did NOT like that AT ALL.

I finally Accio-ed the towel away from his waist, but while I was basking in my glory he said: "If you want commit suicide go right ahead...it's not like anyone would miss you." That god damned bloody asshole bastard of a Gryffindork. My life's goal is to castrate him and throw his mangled penis into a bonfire, while making him watch it burn to ashes.

But according to him, I may as well not have a life.

A-S-S-H-O-L-E

It is god damned basic knowledge that you do not tell people that they should commit suicide! It's bloody wrong, even I don't do it. Although the jerk deserves to be told that. I. Hate. Him. And I am usually the hated, not the hater.

~~~

After being in the security of his dormitory--and safely dressed--, Seamus flopped down on his four-poster bed, his thoughts tormenting him.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I'm so....no...there isn't even a word for what I'm feeling at the moment. I can't even think straight. He takes a shallow breath. All right...must get my thoughts together...

I took a bloody bath in the fucked up prefects bathroom. Peeves came in and stole my clothes and left. I bloody left with a towel on. I started descending the steps when that bloody fucked up Slytherin whore who is unworthy of a proper name ran into me. She almost knocked my damn towel off and then proceeded to look me over as if I were some sort of dessert. She then made some remarks that prove she could not keep her mind out of my pants...or towel in this case. Such as;

"Holy crap you're naked under that!"

"No. I really am cannibalistic. You better watch out before I eat you alive."

She also called my manly side a "little solider". What a fucked up bitch...she was dying to throw me on the floor and start having a mad, hot, sweaty shag session.

At least I dominated the entire conversation...nearly...until the end. But I was glad to have an upper hand for most of...as she did have it the last time we had a talk.

Anyway, finally in a fit of passion...because I was certainly not willing to do so...she removed my towel. Of course she turned her back right away...now I know her...and she is a bitch who would not normally feel the need to be so modest...but I think it was her disgusting attempt to cover up the fact she was shaking with excitement to see my wand. Then I offered to pay for my towel back to which she replied she did not want any money. So I asked her what she wanted...and she paused for a moment. Must have been having an inner battle on whether or not to ask me for a shag...fortune for me she didn't. Instead, she said she wanted to keep the towel. Ugh, bloody bitch.

Ugh, why does that bitch have to pick on me of all people? Don't I already have enough problems as it is? It's not like I need some sly, thinks-she's-cunning, sex-crazed fiend trying to get her hands on my Johnny.

His breathing regulated now that he had gotten that anger off his chest but he bit lip as he remembered what happened next;

"If you want commit suicide go right ahead...its not like anyone would miss you"

And....ugh....after all that fiend has done...I feel like a bloody pile of shit now. I cannot believe I said that. That was low...even for me...No that was beyond low... God damnit... I should be...tortured or something.... My all time new low! I'm now officially worse than a dirty bastard. I'm...okay there are no real words for it but let me try...Thick, slow, dense, dim-witted, unintelligent, dirty, filthy, mucky, grubby, tarnished, flecked, fucked up, jackass bastard with a lopsided arsewhole.

Seamus began to sulk.

Why am I feeling so bloody guilty? Its just that bitch...not like she has feelings anyway...I bet she didn't care. Ugh...okay so maybe...that did cut her...but she didn't show it! She should have at least cried. Ugh, fuck me.

--Fin--