- Rating:
- PG-13
- House:
- The Dark Arts
- Characters:
- Sirius Black
- Genres:
- Alternate Universe
- Era:
- 1981-1991
- Stats:
-
Published: 07/28/2007Updated: 07/28/2007Words: 428Chapters: 1Hits: 186
Guardian's Worry
Professor Morgyn Merlin
- Story Summary:
- Sirius reflects on the war, and worries about those he's supposed to protect. Part of the "Friends and Brothers" AU, set during the same night as "Protecting the Innocent".
Chapter 01
- Posted:
- 07/28/2007
- Hits:
- 186
Guardian's Worries
Sirius stared up at the ceiling above his bed, listening to the quiet sounds of the safehouse at night. Lily would scold him in the morning for not taking the sleeping potion she'd left on the nightstand, but he didn't want to fall asleep yet. That, and he didn't want to find himself waking up to a wand at his throat.
Or not waking up at all.
He shivered, squeezing his eyes shut a moment, only to snap them open again in an effort to banish the images that danced behind his closed lids.
James, so quiet and still, and as cold as the stone slab beneath him. Too prisine for the last time Sirius had seen him, as Aurors arrived to drive the Death Eaters away. Sprawled limply at the edge of the road, his head tilted at an unnatural angle...
Choking, Sirius turned away, bile rising to burn at the back of his throat. He could see Regulus, pale as the white marble of the tomb, staring at the body.
"Reg..." He grabbed his brother's shoulder, forcing him to turn, to walk away, the younger boy half-supporting him as they stumbled out of the mausoleum. Sirius barely made it to the shelter of the tree at the center of the graveyard before he fell to his knees, his stomach heaving even though there was nothing to bring up.
"Sirius." Regulus's hand felt too warm on his shoulder, and Sirius shivered. "Sirius, why didn't you tell me before? Why didn't you tell me when I asked at Hogwarts?"
"I... I couldn't, Reg. I'm sorry. I just... I can still see their bodies, Reg. James... Merlin, Reg, no one should have to see that in the back of their thoughts all the time, and I didn't want to... you're still my little brother, Reg." He looked up at the grey eyes that were so like his own. "It's my job to protect you."
"Who's going to protect you, Sirius?" Regulus looked worried, and a little lost. "How can you protect me if you're dead?"
"I don't know. Fuck, Reg, I don't know."
He still didn't know. He did his best to look out for his brother, and Lily, and the others who relied on them, but some days he wasn't sure how he managed to keep going on. And the longer the war dragged on, the more he felt himself slipping away, the more he worried that this next trip, this next mission, would be his last.
And then who would be around to protect them?