Truly

Truly

"Harry!" Ginny shouted at the closed door, pounding continuously on it as well. "Harry, open the door!"

There was no response beyond the door. Ginny pleaded for Harry to come out again, trying not to let her frustration show in her voice. She couldn't seem to get through to him, no matter how hard she tried. Every time that Harry got into one of these moods, which was quite often lately, it was always her who ran after him...which probably showed how much smarter her brother and Hermione were--they knew when to leave Harry alone.

But, damn it, Harry couldn't keep running off like this! He needed someone to talk to, even if he didn't believe so. Every time she looked at him, he looked horrible. There were dark circles under his eyes, his hair was even messier than it usually was, and he always looked exhausted. That was what everyone could see. What was on the outside.

She saw something else, though. She could see the battle that he was fighting within himself, trying to decide if he could open up to anyone. Trying to decide if he could say out loud what he was thinking on the inside.

Ginny knew that it was exactly how she looked during her first year.

Ginny slid down to the floor, determined not to leave Harry. She would make him talk to her if she had to.

"I'm still here," Ginny announced. "And I'm going to stay here. I'm not going anywhere."

Ever, she added to herself.

She leaned against the closed door and sighed. There was no telling how long it would be before Harry came out of the room. Sometimes it was a mere minute before he opened the door, other times it took hours. Ginny closed her eyes, knowing that she couldn't take it if he stayed in there for hours. She was just too tired.

Ginny felt herself falling. At first, she thought that she had fallen asleep and was dreaming. When she landed on her back on the floor, however, she realized that she wasn't.

She opened her eyes and saw an upturned Harry staring down at her. Obviously, he had opened the door. Thank Merlin.

"Hey," Ginny said, trying to retain her dignity while lying on her back on the floor.

Harry simply looked down at her. She could tell that he wasn't focused on her. He seemed to be deep in thought about something else and, even though his eyes followed her as she stood up, she wasn't on his mind.

Of course, he just had to prove her wrong when he said, "You've changed, you know."

"What do you mean?"

"Since your first year at Hogwarts," Harry explained. "You're just different."

Ginny could feel the tips of her ears turning red. It was a simple comment, yet from him it was important. It proved that he paid attention to her, which she doubted most of the time.

Not that she cared if he paid attention to her.

"Yes, well, I wasn't really myself, was I?" Ginny answered. She brushed past Harry so as to hide her rising blush. She also wanted to ensure that Harry wouldn't close the door on her again, so she sat on the single, dusty bed in the room.

When she looked Harry in the eye again, she saw that he was staring at her intently. Normally, people would look away whenever he stared at them like this. His gaze was just so...penetrating. She, however, looked right back at him.

"What was it like?" Harry spoke softly.

"What was what like?" Ginny whispered, his gaze beginning to wear her down. He just looked so serious and doomed.

Harry took a few steps towards the bed, but he was still a good distance away. He said, "Being so close to Voldemort."

"It wasn't Voldemort," Ginny answered automatically. She finally looked down, embarrassed. Of course it had been Voldemort. "I'm sorry, it's just..."

"Don't be," Harry interrupted. Ginny felt the bed shift and she knew that he had sat next to her on the bed. He continued, "I asked you a question, and I want you to answer it."

"You'll think I'm an idiot or something," Ginny said quietly, looking down at her and Harry's feet. He would think she was an idiot. She even thought that she was an idiot sometimes, when she looked back on it.

"I won't," he insisted.

She looked up at him and could tell that it was true. After all, she had come here to make him talk. If she had to talk first, then she would. They both needed this.

Ginny took a deep breath, and then began, "I still can't imagine that it was him, which is silly, I know. But he was so good at acting...civil. Friendly, kind, caring. How could such an evil man be any of those things? I ask myself that everyday, and I still can't find an answer.

"He was Tom Riddle. That's all. He wasn't a man whose name could bring terror into a household. He wasn't someone out to kill. He just needed someone to talk to.

"So I talked. I told him everything that was on my mind, everything that was bothering me. In return, he told me everything about him. I knew that he was simply a memory of a boy who was born long before I was. I knew what he liked and what he didn't. I even knew what pet he would have gotten if he could ever have had one."

Ginny paused for a moment and looked at Harry again. He was concentrated on her and only her. It was something that she had been dreaming of for a long time--The Boy Who Lived's undivided attention.

But she didn't want to be talking about this.

"He wanted a parrot. Does that seem so harmless? Of course not. Tom was just a normal boy with normal dreams and wishes. Even if he was lying, which he probably was, he'll always be Tom Riddle. A nice guy, even if he was a little strange."

Ginny was finished at last. She sighed and lay down on the bed, arms outstretched. Harry leaned on his hand, bending over her slightly.

He looked down at her and said, "But he possessed you. He made you do things that you didn't want to."

"No," Ginny snapped. "I didn't know what I was doing until much later. I wasn't forced."

Immediately, she knew how stupid that sounded. Harry frowned at her, prompting her to look away. She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands, and then kept her face covered.

It was upsetting, to say the least. After all of this time, Tom--no, Voldemort--still had some kind of hold over her. How could she still be defending the evil git?

"Merlin, it's like a part of him is still inside of me!" Ginny cried, pounding her hands on the bed. "I'm still defending him! What is wrong with me?"

"It's not you," Harry assured her. "It's him. It must be."

"But now? After all of these years?" Ginny asked.

Harry continued to stare at her. Neither of them spoke for a long time. Silence descended over them like a blanket, making it unbearably uncomfortable for Ginny.

When the silence became too much, Ginny said, "You can do this, you know."

Harry rolled his eyes. Then he flopped onto the bed as well.

"You can!" Ginny said, turning her head to look at him. "You're braver than I ever was, and you haven't started too late. You still have time to get to his level."

"His level?"

"Yes. With training, you can be just as powerful as he is. It won't take long."

"Maybe all of you are putting too much faith on one thing," Harry sighed.

Ginny could tell that he was getting angry. She had gotten too far for him to storm out of the room again, so she decided to change the subject. She'd get him into a better mood, and then try to get him to talk.

"Harry?"

"What?" he answered a bit gruffly.

"What's your most embarrassing moment?"

Ginny had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. The expression on Harry's face changed from defensive, to confused, to relieved in about two seconds. Then, when he turned his head to look at her, his look was one of joy. It was a look that Ginny had managed to see more than anyone else in the past few weeks.

It had started when Harry had arrived at Grimmauld Place. Everyone had already been anxious, but Harry's arrival just brought up more fears. Was Harry just as moody as he had been the year before? Would he be even less likely to talk because of Sirius's death? No one knew what to expect from him, and that was frightening.

While everyone else had tried to coax Harry to talk about the past year, Ginny had taken a different approach. By introducing Harry to Truth, a Muggle game that Hermione had taught Ginny, she had gotten him to talk about things less painful. Things such as his fondest memory, his favorite color, his least favorite color, etc. Ginny's plan was to gradually lead him into the questions that everyone was always asking him.

The game turned into a continuous one. They asked each other questions whenever they felt like it, anytime, anywhere. Such as now.

"I was five," Harry started. "I was at the park, which was a miracle. Dudley hadn't wanted me to come but Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon hadn't been able to find a sitter in time. So, I got to come along.

"Uncle Vernon had threatened me to keep out of their way, which was easy. I simply went over to the opposite side of the park, where the swings were. Well, I was swinging when a really cute five-year-old girl came over. She started talking to me and I was somehow able to talk to her despite my shock. I was used to being ignored, so I never thought that anyone would want to talk to me.

"We talked for a few minutes, until Dudley came over. I'm certain that he has some instinct that tells him when I'm having a good time, just so he can come over and make my life a living hell again. Unfortunately, he succeeded. He began telling embarrassing things about me, although half of them were lies. Then, right in public, he pulled down my pants. It was mortifying."

Ginny couldn't help it. She began to laugh hysterically, ignoring the shocked look on Harry's face.

"It wasn't that funny!" Harry chuckled, looking at Ginny's flushed face.

"I know!" Ginny giggled. "How old were you, five? I didn't have a crush when I was five!"

"Five-year-olds aren't devoid of feeling, you know!" Harry said. "You had to have some kind of crush! Who was it?"

Ginny suddenly calmed, now that the question was for her. She took games very seriously, and this one was no exception.

Ginny thought for a while, trying to remember when she was five. Finally, she said, "You can't really call it a crush, I suppose. I had never even seen the boy, and I only knew of him because..."

She trailed off, realizing that she was, in fact, laying right next to her childhood crush. Oh, dear.

Her face immediately flushed red again, although this time it wasn't because she was laughing. In an attempt to keep Harry from realizing her moment of hesitation, she shifted on the bed. She was now lying on her side, hand on her cheek, facing Harry.

"Nope, no crush," Ginny said a little too quickly. "What's your favorite type of weather?"

Harry could tell that Ginny had changed the subject for a reason. He also figured out why she had, but he decided to let it go. He answered, "Thunderstorms. It's the best time to think, in my opinion."

"Interesting," Ginny answered mindlessly. Her blush was beginning to fade.

"When was the last time you kissed someone?"

And there it went again. Argh!

"What?" Ginny squeaked. She mentally hit herself. She needed to calm down!

"When was the last time you kissed someone?" Harry repeated. He either didn't notice how uncomfortable she was, or he was ignoring it.

"Erm, actually...I've never kissed anyone," Ginny admitted.

Harry was taken aback. Ginny could tell that that fact had surprised him, and she could understand why. She had dated Michael Corner for almost a year. Most people assumed, of course, that they had kissed at the least.

"Really?" Harry asked. "But what about..."

"Michael? He tried to kiss me, but I never let him."

"Why?"

"I don't know," Ginny answered truthfully. "I could just tell that I didn't want Michael to be my first kiss. I don't want to look back on my first kiss years later with a sense of regret."

Harry was silent. It was easy to tell that he was thinking about something. Then, he said, "You were smart. I wish that I had done the same thing."

It was stupid, but Ginny couldn't help but feel a little angry at Harry's comment. It meant that he had already kissed someone, and she should have expected that. He was the Boy-Who-Lived. Not only that, but he was a really sweet guy. Any sane girl would want to kiss him.

It was probably Cho, Ginny thought to herself. She had seen the two of them together quite a lot last year. Plus, it had been obvious that Harry had liked her for the past few years.

What was it about Cho Chang that made her so irresistible?

"Do you want to do this again?" Harry interrupted her thoughts.

"You can't have two questions," Ginny stated.

"I know, but...just answer the question," Harry said. "It's important."

"Do I want to talk again?" Ginny asked. "Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"No," Harry sighed in frustration. "I mean, do you want to talk again alone?"

Ginny was speechless. Was he asking her what she thought he was asking her? Oh, Merlin! She was shaking. Did he notice? Well, he had to notice her red face. Why did she have to blush so much?!

"You mean a date?"

Fortunately, Harry was turning just as red as she was.

"If that's what you define as a date, then yes. It's a date," Harry said quietly.

Feeling a little better knowing that Harry was just as nervous as she was, Ginny sat up. She smirked and said, "If that is what I define as a date, then wouldn't this be a date?"

Ginny had to keep herself from laughing at Harry. His eyes had gotten so wide that they practically looked too big for his head. If they got any wider, she was sure that they would pop out of his skull.

"Uh, I s-suppose," Harry croaked. He cleared his throat, but his voice still seemed unusually high when he said, "You could call it a date, I guess."

Not wanting to make Harry any more uncomfortable, Ginny said, "Yes, Harry. I would love to do this again sometime."

Harry visibly relaxed. He smiled at Ginny, and she smiled back. She could practically hear her heart beating, and she was paranoid that he could too. She hoped not.

"Although," Ginny said thoughtfully, making Harry tense again. Was she going to change her mind? "It would be nice to actually go somewhere on our next date."

Both of them grinned, and Harry nodded.

"No problem."