Sat Down and Cried Today

Hermione was startled by the picture that fell from the book in her hands. She had not seen it in many years. She actually thought it was lost when an old wallet had been stolen years before. Given how her heart hurt, it may have been best if it was. With a sad smile she stroked the muggle image. Slowly memories of things best forgotten rushed forward. She bit her lip to keep from whimpering. Had anyone told her during their sixth year at Hogwarts that the Trio would be broken, she would have laughed at their lack of belief in friendship and love. But then again…the trio was no more.

It ended when Harry said the words that broke Hermione’s heart. “It was all a mistake. It was wrong, totally wrong. It should have never happened.” Maybe sex was wrong between friends. But hell, he had to know that she was in love with him. Granted she knew the sex was just sex. But did he have to belittle it? Like it was something between strangers? A meaningless act between two people who had no past or future?

Even remembering the his words brought tears to her eyes. What would have happened if she had ignored them. Those words. Would they still be friends today? Or would something else finally tear them apart? Maybe their friendship was doomed from the start. She thought she could out run her feelings. Or at least hide them down in the deepest crevices of her heart. She should have known better.

She still could not understand how it went so bad so quick. The first time had been an accident. They had been watching a movie at his flat. She went because she wanted company. It was awkward but beautiful. Maybe it was her unwillingness to give up on him. But it felt right. Not the “For now and forever” type of right. The right of a natural thing between close friends. Like it was a bonding act. To solidify the relationship. When it happened again, Hermione knew it still was not a progression from friends. But still, it felt right. Or at least to her.

When they halted their acts, it was okay. She knew they would not be lovers forever. He loved her, just not like that. Thinking back, maybe he never loved her at all. Or at least not enough. He must have known those words would crush her. Maybe he didn’t care. She never gave a chance to explain what he meant. She had noticed the changes in him. In them and their friendship. His words ended the ties that bonded them. She walked away. Never looked back until today.

She tried not to second guess herself as she put the picture back in the book. She placed the book in the donation box. She sorted through a few more bookshelves. Finally she could not ignore the pain anymore. So she went to meditate by the ocean and heal her freshly broken heart. Broken again…

All because of a picture.