The Art of Being Nice

The Art Of Being Nice

He'd always thought that becoming a Death Eater had changed his life the most, and that the final battle with Voldemort would bring another crucial impact to it - for better or worse. Most likely the latter. But as the change came, it was just Remus Lupin.

***

"You did Snape?"

Sirius made an amused face, obviously not taking him very serious. Great! Remus was already regretting this.

"If I'd known you were that desperate," Sirius went on unimpressedly, "I could have asked Filch for you first."

"I shouldn't have told you."

"You're absolutely right. Bad wolf!"

"SIRIUS!"

"Why so cranky? It's a joke, right! I mean, imagine! You and Snape doing - no! I'm not going to imagine that."

"I don't have to defend myself, you know. It was ... nice. And I'm not regretting any- "

"NICE? Good Lord ... nice?" Sirius almost choked on the word and Remus patted him briskly on the back.

"Ouch! That wasn't very nice," Sirius croaked, immediately doubling up with laughter.

Remus glared at him, trying to decide whether to get worried or angry. Well, he knew what Severus would do. He smiled and pushed that thought away. "Oh, stop that."

"It is a joke, right?" Sirius was still giggling.

Remus shrugged, flushing slightly - and Sirius' smile died away instantly.

"You did Snape!"

"You said that twice."

"Actually, the first time it was a question. Whereas this was a shocked, disbelieving statement with an exclamation mark at its end. Like this!"

Remus shook his head. How could he have been so stupid. Telling Sirius about this was like repotting Mandrakes without earmuffs - fatal, at least. It was pretty obvious how Sirius would react. First he would insult Snape ...

"What happened? Will you bloody explain that? Did Snape force you to do it? You can tell me. I'll kill him!"

"Don't be ridiculous!" ... then he would feel betrayed.

"How could you do this? We hate him."

"Speak for yourself! I've never hated - "

"Of course you did!"

"Then I don't anymore, if that suits you better."

"I just can't ... " Sirius gave up on the words and started pacing the room.

"Look," Remus started but didn't really know what to say either. "It just happened, okay?" He sighed. That was clearly the most worn-out thing to say in a situation like this. "I mean, it wasn't that ... it was only one night and - "

"Why did you tell me, then?" Sirius cut him, stopping in his tracks. "Why tell me if it was only one night?"

"..."

"When you know the answer, give me a call. I'm going home. Or perhaps I'll just kill the bloody bastard. About time, too." Sirius turned on his heels and left.

Remus stared at the now closed door. He knew that he probably should feel awful for hurting Sirius - even if this was nonsense - but all he could think of was the answer to Sirius' question, which had just popped up in his head. And there was only one way to find out if it was the right one.

***

"You told Black?" Severus looked up from his papers. "That's a joke."

Remus flopped on Severus' couch and made a stern face. "Do I look amused?" he asked irritatedly. "Why's everyone asking me that?"

"Because not even the people who know you close and personal would actually believe you did such a bloody stupid thing. What were you - no. I know you weren't thinking." He concentrated on his papers again.

"So?" Remus asked, surprised at Severus' lack of interest.

"So what?"

"Don't you want to know what he said?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I'm not interested?" Severus replied in his most ironic tone. "I don't care what Black thinks."

"Well, he mentioned something about 'killing the bloody bastard'."

"He's more than welcome to try. Now, will you shut up and go. I have work here."

They both stayed silent for almost five minutes, before suddenly Severus banged his fist on the desk, breaking his quill. "Why are you still here? And why did you tell him, anyway? It's not that I like the thought of Black knowing about something as ... "

He stopped and Remus sat up straight. "What? Embarrassing? Is that what you think?" Severus shot him a dark look and he immediately regretted his words. He should get paid for misplaced statements today.

"Important ... I was going to say. But perhaps you didn't notice."

Remus was puzzled. "I'm sorry, Severus. I didn't mean to - "

"Save it."

"It's not that you express feelings like that very often."

"And that's coming from someone who's had his one true love in front of his face for almost two years now and is still scared stiff so much as to breathe a word about his feelings for him, and to top it all, tells him he shagged the man he hates beyond anything. If that is your way of showing him your affection you messed it up real good."

"..."

"Ah - finally lost for words, wolfboy? Good. Then I can probably finish this."

Severus fiercely attacked his papers and was left undisturbed for longer than he'd thought before Remus broke the silence again.

"You think I feel that way?"

Severus looked up. "Of course I do," he snapped angrily. "And if Black wasn't too darn occupied with playing the mistreated and haunted lone ... creature, he would probably feel the same way." He paused, clearly exasperated. "If he would try for just one second not to be angry or ... he would know what to make of it."

Remus stared. "We are still talking about Sirius, aren't we?"

"..."

"Because if we aren't - "

"We are. I'm not in love with you, Lupin." Remus twitched and Severus had time to realise how cold he'd just sounded and wished that for once he hadn't.

Remus stood up. He turned to go but then thought better of it. He wouldn't leave like this. "You know what? You and Sirius are perfect for each other. The both of you could just go on hating yourselves and each other until forever without bothering anyone else. You totally deserve each other." He almost shouted his last words. "And you two don't own the exclusive right to be angry!"

"Please, sit down again," Severus muttered.

"Why?"

Severus didn't know. After a few moments of silence Remus waved his arms in a who-cares gesture but slouched back on the couch.

"Why don't you finish your work and ... I don't know."

Severus cleared his throat. "I'm not halfway through with it. It will probably take an hour or two." He waited for Remus to say or do anything, but he just sat there and Severus felt confused. "You can stay, if you want," he added.

"Hm."

He started writing again. "So ... what did you tell him, then?"

"I told him it was nice."

"NICE?" Severus gaped and Remus finally smiled.

"Maybe you didn't notice?" he retorted. His smile broadened and Severus tried to fight back the feeling of comfort this caused. If he would ever fall in love with at least some part of Remus Lupin, he thought despite himself, it would be this smile. He quickly concentrated on his papers again, still feeling the warm tickle in the centre of his stomach.

***

After two hours he gave up. It was just no use. His eyes had been randomly wandering over to Remus, who had fallen asleep with a book about sleeping potions hovering above his head. Severus stood up and walked over, shooing the book away. With a charm he largened the couch to a reasonable size and hesitated shortly before lying down. Listening to Remus' steady breathing, he folded his arms behind his head. He irritatedly realised he was nervous. He'd never imagined that this one night - which had been surprising and exciting, well, satisfying by all means - would result in Remus showing further interest. Or whatever this was. And strangely, it felt more intimate now that Remus was just ... around, and nothing had happened yet.

As if he could read his thoughts, Remus was stirring and Severus almost jumped. He quickly tried to decide whether he wanted something to happen or not and had just made up his mind to get up when Remus rolled over and snuggled against his shoulder. Severus held his breath and slowly turned his head. Remus' eyes were still closed and he seemed only half awake.

"What took you so long?" he asked sleepily. "Your book was boring."

"Err ... it's not meant to entertain."

"You know there's no such thing as a sleeping potion in the first place. It's all psychology. You give the patient a book like this and he falls asleep right away." Remus moved one hand into his. "So, are you finished?"

Instead of answering Severus kissed him. Again! But it wasn't like last time - because now, Remus returned it naturally, as if this was the only thing to do. Remus deepened the kiss, clearly more awake now, and Severus felt his heart pounding up to his throat.

"Hmm, that proves my theory," Remus whispered as they drew back.

"What are you babbling about?" Severus shifted position, moving over to Remus' side of the couch but Remus pushed him back and pinned him down easily, covering Severus' face with more kisses.

"Can't you really think ..." Remus managed inbetween kissing and breathing and everything else, "... of another ... reason ... I told Sirius?"

Remus sat up and started to take off his shirt and Severus didn't feel like thinking. He pulled Remus back down, swifly reversing their positions and handling the shirt, which brought an expression of perplexed admiration on Remus' face.

"If you mention that name one more time I'm -" He froze. He could actually think of a good reason ...

This time, Remus cleared his throat. "It was important. And I noticed. I think that's why I wanted to ... share it with my best friend." He looked up anxiously, and though Severus was thunderstruck he couldn't hold back a sarcastic remark.

"Didn't quite work out, did it?"

"Obviously that's not the only thing," Remus snapped, glaring.

"Don't do that." Severus glared back.

"Do what?"

"The melodrama."

"Oh, look who's talking, Mister I-Wear-Nothing-But-Black-Because-I'm-So-Mysterious!"

Severus sighed. Remus and sarcasm had never been a subtle combination. "What do you expect me to say, then?"

"I don't know. Anything!"

"I just did say something, and you were complaining."

"You bloody well know what I mean."

"No, tell me!"

"Jesus, can we just skip that."

"Skip what?"

"The bickering - everything. I know, it's the great cliché and everyone kind of expects that ... but can we just go to the wanting-to-be-together part, now?"

There was a moment of akward silence before Severus spoke again. His voice sounded strangely detached.

"You want to be together ... with me?"

"So it bloody seems."

Severus suddenly jumped up, throwing the shirt over to Remus, his hand slightly shaking.

"Alright."

"What ... " Remus stammered.

"I could see you tomorrow evening."

"What?"

"Eight p.m."

"You want to da-"

"I'm not dating you, Lu- Remus!" Damn. That name just couldn't be snapped properly. He would have to work on that. "It's late and I still have work to do. You want to see me tomorrow or not?"

***

Five minutes later Severus had his room back to himself. He thought about shrinking the couch back to its original size but left it. Surprisingly he was focused enough to finish his papers in almost no time, so he cleaned up afterwards and went to bed. Remus hadn't asked him why he'd wanted to make this date, but the question had clearly stuck out from his face. Of course Severus hadn't told him. Perhaps he would, someday. But for now, he would savour the feeling that - after a very long time - he had something to look forward to.

The end