Loyalty

The Hogwarts Express had left platform 9 ¾ and was now on its way to the school. Hannah was sitting in a compartment with some of her fellow Hufflepuffs. They were discussing the latest news about Quidditch. Apparently, the others had found a way to cope with Cedric's death or avoid thinking about it. But a lot of them had not known him that well.

Hannah looked at Susan who was sitting opposite of her. They were the only ones not talking.

Her memory about the funeral was still vivid. A lot of the details were blurry, though, while others were still so clear that she thought when she opened her eyes again, it would all be there in reality.

His mother was sitting on a white folding chair throughout the whole ceremony. She had hidden her eyes behind a black veil.

Cho was there as well. She could not make out what Cho was feeling at this moment. Her face did not show any emotions. At first, it seemed to her as if she did not care. But she knew how much they had liked each other - Cedric and Cho. And after some time, she saw that a few tears were rolling down on her face as well.

Cedric had been popular and he had had a lot of friends, all of whom were now here to say goodbye. She knew that his family had wanted to have a private little ceremony with only the closest relatives and friends around, but in the end, they had agreed to have everyone who had wanted to come.

She had not spoken much with Cedric during the last year, his last year. But she had known him a lot better than most of the people here. His father had seen her at the beginning of the funeral and had even tried to give her a smile.

It had been raining all day long when in the middle of the ceremony the sun had started to shine. She turned her head around, searching for the rainbow. And there it was, beautiful as always.

The next thing she remembered was some friends trying to help her up again. She must have broken down. Not many people had noticed it. But for a brief moment, she felt Cho's eyes upon her.

"But if they don't get another Seeker, they will not have a winning chance. Their Chasers are just mediocre!", Ernie exclaimed. "They can do whatever they want, they'll never beat the Montrose Magpies", Justin added.

They were still talking about Quidditch and their conversation slowly became hot tempered. Everyone had what they felt were the best suggestions for their favourite teams to become better.

She looked at the friend opposite of her and they exchanged weak smiles.

The scenery outside seemed to be flying by. It would not take much longer, soon they would be back at Hogwarts.

She wondered what it would be like to be back. What it would be like to be in their Common Room again and if anything would change or if everybody would just continue living like they had done before.

*

The Sorting Ceremony - she had always loved it. All those older brothers and sisters sitting there, pride being mirrored in their eyes when their younger siblings entered the Great Hall and finally became a part of Hogwarts. Disappointment when they did not end up in the same house and even more pride when they did.

"Julius!"

She could not believe he was really here. After all that had happened, she had forgotten that he was to start his education at Hogwarts this year, but she also could not believe his parents had allowed him to even come. It had been some time since she had last seen him. He had grown during this summer and now looked even more like Cedric.

He turned his head towards her and while smiling at each other, he lifted his arm and waved at her. This made her a bit happier. He still knew who she was.

However, he looked out of place here. And she had noticed how everyone was practically staring at him. Just like a gauntlet, she thought.

When Julius was sorted into Ravenclaw, she let out a relieved sigh. She really liked that boy but the mere thought of having him in her House and having to see him even more often made her sad. He looked too much like Cedric. She wanted to remember Cedric just like he had been and not like that guy who looked so much like Julius.

*

Professor Sprout had informed them that the security spells at Hogwarts had been increased for this year. There were a lot of new rules now that were on their message boards in the Common Rooms.

Apparently, some of the teachers thought that none of the students should be allowed to go to Hogsmeade but Professor Dumbledore had not announced anything about that yet.

She would have liked going to Hogsmeade. Actually, she would have liked everything that would have distracted her a bit more. The whole Common Room reminded her so much of Cedric. It would not have surprised her if he had come out of the boys dorm now. But he did not. And he would never be in here again.

She was silent these days. Everyone accepted it more or less and she was left alone when she asked for it. She could not talk about her feelings. Most of the time, she either found something to distract herself or went somewhere she could be alone.

In the beginning, it had been rather difficult to really find a quiet place, but now she had found one she regularly visited. It was nice to just sit there in front of the window, look outside and maybe observe what other students were doing outside. It was one of the more or less abandoned hallways.

Looking into the grey sky, the memory of the funeral became vivid again. However, the memory of him the summer before his death was so strong that it became almost unbearable for her. In those moments, she searched for solitude. And in those moments, he came back.

She closed her eyes.

The sun was shining, and gently touching her skin while the slight summer breeze played with her hair. He was standing behind her and carefully embraced her. The sky was bright azure covered by a few clouds. She took his right hand and gave it a gentle kiss while they were standing on a small hill and looked down to the village. Everything looked very small from this point but also rather peaceful. No disturbing noises reached their ears. All they could hear were the birds singing and chirping in the nearby trees and the humming of little bumble-bees searching for lush flowers.

She did not know how long they had already been standing there. His head was resting slightly on her left shoulder and she felt his warm breath.

Even when it had started raining, they did not move. The sun was still giving them enough warmth. She could not remember the last time she had felt that comfortable.

This summer had been the best she had ever had so far and her only wish at that moment was that time would stand still, if only for a little bit longer.

They had been seeing each other for almost the whole summer break now. Usually, they talked a lot about everything - classes, their friends, what they thought their future to be like. Today, they had decided for a picnic up on this hill.

"Look!", Cedric pointed to a place in the sky.

A rainbow had appeared and they were both watching it, still saying nothing.

"I think I will always connect rainbows with this moment now", he told her and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

They watched the rain stop and in the end, the rainbow had disappeared... and their relationship had ended not long after that.

It just was not meant to be, she thought. And she had never been angry at him. It was for the best of both of them and they had been able to stay friends throughout the year after that summer. Although, of course, they had not spoken much to each other anymore.

Her eyes were teary when she opened them again. If she did not want to worry her house mates, she had to get back to her Common Room now. Slowly, she let the memory of that afternoon fade away and got up.

Turning around a corner, reality hit her like a lightning bolt. Stunned, she stood there and looked at the students. A lot of them were standing together in groups, speaking almost hysterically. Others were running - where to, she could not see. Some prefects tried to get their students into their Common Rooms. She could not see a teacher from where she was standing.

After a few moments, she went to one of the Prefects.

"What happened?" She asked with a trembling voice.

"Harry Potter was killed. I can't tell you anything else at the moment. Just go into your Common Room."

Susan was shocked. At first, she could not move at all and just stared at the scenery around her. Finally, she started walking, slowly first, then becoming faster.

On her way to the Common Room, she saw Julius again and stopped once more. In these few months they had been here at Hogwarts now, she had not seen him often and she was thankful for that. At first, she had been worried that Julius might try to talk to her and she would not have been able to cope with that. But fortunately, he had not done anything like that. She had seen him talk with other students from his own year, but older students, students who had known Cedric, generally avoided Julius.

He had looked at her, which meant that he had seen her. But his face had not shown the slightest emotion.

He must have heard it. Everyone has heard it by now. And where did he go to? She looked at the hallways and came to the conclusion that he was probably about to go to his own Common Room. By now, she felt that she was slightly trembling and she just wanted to reach her Common Room now.

Turning around another corner, she saw a girl at the far end of the hallway. Something was wrong with her. Her footsteps were not at all secure, she was lurching and in the next moment, she had collapsed.

Coming closer, she realized who it was and started to run until she had reached her. She bent down right next to her.

"Hannah, what's wrong?"

"Susan... did you hear...?"

Susan nodded and held her hand. "I'm going to get someone, okay?"

Hannah tried to shake her head, then closed her eyes and opened them again a few moments later.

"Please stay, Susan. I need to tell you something. You're my best friend and I know I can trust you. I have to tell someone..."

Susan's eyes widened and her whole body was tense now. Hannah fidgeted a bit and Susan noticed that her grasp around Hannah's hand had become too strong. Loosening it a bit, she carefully removed Hannah's wet hair out of her face with her other hand and prepared for whatever might come now.

Hannah's voice was very quiet but clear.

"I did it. I killed Harry Potter."

Susan stared at Hannah. Her best friend? Images of the little girl with the red face and the pigtails sprang to her mind. Hannah as she had been when they got to know each other in their first year. Little Hannah who was always cheerful and could make everyone laugh?

She turned her head away from Hannah. In all those years at Hogwarts, they had been best friends and they knew each other inside out. And yet looking into Hannah's eyes, Susan knew she was not lying. But there was more in those eyes. It was fear and despair. Now that she had told Susan, it was up to her what to do with the knowledge. She was now at Susan's mercy.

Behind them, Susan could hear footsteps. She turned her head towards the sounds and then looked up at the figure coming towards them. It was Albus Dumbledore. When he had reached them, he kneeled next to Susan and looked at Hannah who had closed her eyes, then looked back at Susan with a questioning look.

"What happened?"

A thousand different answers ran through Susan's head now. What exactly did Professor Dumbledore already know?

Susan slowly opened her mouth, preparing herself to answer his question.