Marauders Redux

Chapter 3: His Weaknesses

Sirius stared at the pair of them for a moment, and then let out a whoop of excitement, leaping into the air. "We're going out on the town! You two rock!"

This was exactly what Remus had been afraid of--Sirius had so little sense of personal danger. It was up to Remus to be the voice of reason, and he was afraid that reason would not win the day. He already felt a headache coming on.

"Sirius--Bill--Nymphadora--this is a very bad idea. Not only would this little plan of yours completely violate Dumbledore's strict orders, but it would also put our friend here in very grave danger. I'm afraid I simply can't let you do this," said Remus.

"Can't let?!" cried Sirius, his expression growing dark. "What do you mean can't let?" Sirius began to advance on him menacingly.

As Remus opened his mouth for a rebuttal, Nymphadora stepped between them, stopping Sirius mid-stride by placing a hand on his chest. "Calm down, Sirius. I was expecting this. Don't worry--give me five minutes alone with him, and he'll cave in."

Sirius frowned. "I'm not sure about that. He can be very stubborn sometimes."

"I know his weaknesses. I can handle him," she said, giving Sirius a quick wink.

Remus folded his arms across his chest in exasperation. "Now that you're done boasting about your prowess at manipulating me, would you mind discussing this like adults for a few minutes?"

Sirius rolled his eyes, and looked back at Nymphadora. "See what I mean?" he said.

She reached up to pat Sirius on the cheek. "Don't worry, Padfoot. I'll straighten him out in a jiffy. You and Bill get to work. I'll take care of Remus."

"Would you kindly stop talking about me as if I'm not here?" said Remus, angrily. This was getting out of hand already.

Nymphadora spun around on her heel to face him. "Come with me, Remus," she said sternly.

"No, I will not come with you. We are all going to talk about this right here, right now!"

"No, we will not. You and I will talk about this by ourselves, in the dining room. Now come with me."

"This is absurd!"

"Remus! Come! Now!" she said in a harsh, authoritarian tone. She spun again, and stomped out of the room.

He had never heard that tone from her before, and it startled him into silence. He glared at the broadly smiling Bill one more time before following her out of the parlor and into the dining room. With a flick of her wand she closed the door behind him.

"Nymph..." he began.

She interrupted him. "Not a word from you, Remus Lupin! Not a single word! You're going to hear me out before you start giving me one your patronizing lectures. Bill and I have worked too hard on this surprise to let you ruin it for Sirius--do you understand?"

"Patronizing lectures!?" he exclaimed.

She reached up her hand, and touched the tip of her finger to his lips to silence him. "Sorry--I exaggerated. They're not usually patronizing. But the lecturing must be a habit left over from your year as a school teacher. Understandable, but still a tad annoying."

He tried to muster a suitable retort, but it died on the tip of his tongue as she slid her hand down from his lips to rest lightly on his chest. She was standing so close to him, looking up into his eyes... He began to feel a little dizzy.

"Now," said Nymphadora softly. "You and I both know that Sirius has been getting absolutely barmy locked up this horrible house for months and months without a break. And those three little excursions to play fetch in the park don't count as getting out of the house!"

"Well, he was outside."

"As a dog!"

"That's better than nothing," insisted Remus. "And it didn't risk his life!"

"Are you so sure?" said Nymphadora, raising an eyebrow. "He could have run into traffic and been hit by a car."

Remus shook his head. "Now you're just being silly."

"No, I'm not," she said, stepping a little closer to him, bringing her other hand to rest on his chest as well. He began to wonder if the airflow in the room was a bit lacking--the dizziness was getting worse.

"Polyjuice potion is the most effective method of disguise known to wizard-kind," she said. "If Barty Crouch Jr. could successfully pretend to be Mad-Eye Moody for an entire year, then Sirius should have no trouble being someone else for a single night. Besides, we've been working on it for a month. We're not going to make a habit of this sort of thing, but just for this one night--for this special occasion--Sirius will get a chance to feel free. He'll get a chance to feel normal again. What better gift could we give him than that?"

Remus could feel his resolve crumbling as his brain absorbed her vanilla-spiced scent. But he had to be the voice of reason here--didn't he? "What if he misses a dose? Or runs out of potion?"

"Not going to happen," she said, shaking her head. "We've got four flasks full of the stuff--one for each of us to carry. That should take care of any contingencies. Besides, we'll have double protection at the concert--the Polyjuice isn't our only cover."

"What else is there?" he asked, raising his hand to his chest to cover one of her own. He felt a tingle of excitement shooting through his body. Suddenly the thought of going to concert with Nymphadora didn't seem so bad after all--even if it meant taking a risk with Sirius. After all, he and Sirius always used to take risks, back in the old days. And they always came out all right. Would it really be so bad?

"Our backup cover," said Nymphadora with an impish grin. "Is the opening act. The Hobgoblins are back together."

"Excuse me? The who?"

"The Hobgoblins--Stubby Boardman is back in the band, and they're opening for the Weird Sisters!" she exclaimed with delight.

"How is this supposed to help Sirius?"

She frowned. "You don't read the Quibbler, do you?"

"Why would I read that rubbish?" he retorted.

Nymphadora sighed, and rolled her eyes. "So you don't know anything about the stories claiming that Sirius is actually the lead singer in the band the Hobgoblins?"

"Oh!" exclaimed Remus, finally remembering. "I think Sirius might have mentioned that to me a few months ago. But it's complete nonsense--anyone with half a brain knows that."

"Then there must be lots of witches out there with less than half a brain," said Nymphadora, pulling away from him.

Remus was still a bit confused. "So, are you trying to tell me that there are people who actually believe that this Stubby Boardman character and Sirius Black are really the same person?"

"Yes!" retorted Nymphadora. "If you read the Quibbler, you'd already know that. It's been running a series of articles on the subject for months now."

"And how is this going to help us protect Sirius at the Weird Sisters concert?" he asked.

Nymphadora rolled her eyes again. "Honestly, Remus. For a man of intelligence you can be ridiculously slow sometimes."

He glared at her.

She continued. "Let me explain--since you can't seem to fill in the blanks yourself." She sighed. "Though it doesn't reflect well on my gender, I have to admit that there are a large number of women who take great delight in fantasizing about men that they've never met, almost to the point of believing themselves in love with these fantasy men. The blokes they fantasize about tend to fall into certain categories, including artistic types, and men who are dangerous and exciting. So if you buy into this Boardman is Black business, he fits all those categories. The dashing and romantic rock and roll singer who was framed for murder and falsely imprisoned for more than a decade and who two years ago made a daring escape and is still wanted by the Ministry. It's quite a story, and witches all over England are swooning."

Remus stared at her in amazement. "You've got to be kidding me!"

She shook her head. "Not at all. Stubby 'Sirius Black' Boardman has developed a very loyal and devoted following among the lonely and not-too-bright witches of our fair land. They call themselves the 'Boardmaniacs'."

Remus laughed. "This can't be real!"

"Oh, but it is," replied Nymphadora. "They even have a weekly newsletter where they can all gush about Boardman, and share their poetry and stories about him, and relate the latest Boardman sightings. If any of them bothered to do even a little bit of research, they would learn that Boardman has spent the last fifteen years in Yorkshire working as an Assistant Herbologist, and that he retired from music because he was pelted with rotten vegetables by a crowd of drunken louts. But they won't hear it. Instead he is their persecuted hero on the run. It really is ridiculous, Remus. It almost makes me ashamed of my sex."

"Extraordinary," said Remus.

"Isn't it? And naturally all the press about Boardman has led to amazing sales figures for old Hobgoblin's recordings. They've suddenly come back in style."

"So," said Remus. "This Hobgoblins performance must be like the second coming of Merlin for these 'Boardmaniacs.'"

"Now you're catching on," she said with a smile. "The crowd is bound to be full of dozens of devoted Boardmaniacs, and if someone starts crying out that they've seen Sirius Black, everyone else will just ignore it and blame the fuss on those barmy Boardman fans."

Remus could hardly believe it--but it was so outrageous it just had to be true. "You know, Nymphadora," he admitted. "Your plan just might work."

Her face lit up. "So you'll come?"

"Now hold on, I didn't say that. Just because your plan might work doesn't mean we ought to do it." He wagged his finger at her as he spoke.

Nymphadora's shoulders slumped and her face fell. "So what else is the problem?"

"Taking Sirius out of the house is an express violation of Dumbledore's orders. I'm not inclined to betray his trust for such a trivial matter," said Remus, mustering the sternest face possible.

Nymphadora glared at him. "Trivial? Haven't you seen how unhappy he's been--how crazy he's getting--locked up in this horrible house all day every day? It's killing him! This one night will mean so much to him--and you call it trivial!"

Remus felt guilty. She was absolutely right about Sirius; his confinement in the house was killing him. But surely there had to be a safer way to cheer him up than this! And he couldn't let Dumbledore down again. He had failed him too often in the past.

Remus shook his head. "I wish there was something we could do...something that wouldn't violate Dumbledore's orders. You were there when he chastised us for the trips to the park! You saw how upset he was. I'm sure you can imagine how much worse it will be when he finds out about this!"

"So you care more about getting a few harsh words from Dumbledore than you do about preserving your best friend's happiness and sanity?" she retorted.

"No! It's just..."

"Just what?" she said, glaring at him harshly. "Anyway--you're hardly one to complain about betraying Dumbledore's trust. I've heard enough stories about the old days to know that wasn't always such a concern for you."

Though he knew Nymphadora couldn't understand, and wasn't deliberately trying to hurt him, that comment hit him like a blow. Dumbledore was his father's second cousin once removed, and had been like a favorite old uncle to him when he was a boy. He was the only person with any real power or respect in the Wizarding world that had ever given Remus a chance. He went to extremes to get Remus safely into school at Hogwarts. He had made Remus a prefect. He had helped Remus get several jobs after his graduation. He had trusted him enough that Remus had been the first person of his generation invited to join the original Order of the Phoenix. He had been there for Remus after his friends were killed, and Sirius was blamed. He had been there for Remus when his parents died. And he had been there for Remus for all those long lonely years after. Even more recently, he had trusted Remus enough to give him a teaching job at Hogwarts. He had wanted Remus to stay on at the school even after all that had happened and been revealed on that terrible full-moon night nearly two years ago. And even now he trusted Remus to lead the Order in his absence. Dumbledore had offered Remus unconditional trust. And Remus felt that he had betrayed him at every turn.

In school he never exerted any influence to stop his friends' wild shenanigans. And even worse, he was a willing party to their full-moon expeditions, which could have put dozens of innocent people at risk. And then, while he was teaching, he continued to hide the fact that Sirius was an Animagus. Dumbledore had quickly forgiven his deception, but Remus had yet to forgive himself. And he was determined not to betray his mentor and benefactor again.

Remus looked at the ground. "I'm sorry, Nymphadora, but I've betrayed his trust once too often. I am not going to do it again. I won't be a party to this."

"Fine!" she snapped. "Stay home and mope, if it suits you. But Bill and I are going, and we're taking Sirius with us--whether you like it or not!"

He looked up into her eyes again. They flashed with passion and anger. She wasn't making any idle threats. She was ready to go through with it. And she might resent him forever if he didn't come.

"I told you," he said steadily. "You can't take him."

"And I told you," she replied, stepping forward defiantly. "That he's coming, with or without you."

He tensed, his hand instinctively reaching for his wand-pocket. "I can't let you do this."

She looked at his hand hovering over his wand, and mimicked the gesture. "What are you going to do?" she asked. "Fight us? Take us on one at a time?"

Remus felt his wand hand trembling. What was he doing? What was he thinking? He was about to jeopardize his friendships over what? A concert? And Polyjuice Potion really was the most effective disguise in the world... And Dumbledore didn't have to find out...As long as they were careful--and discreet. Something he couldn't count on unless he went along to make sure. One thing was certain--he wasn't going to start dueling his dearest friends over an illicit trip to a concert.

He turned away from her, and looked at the ground again, his wand hand relaxing. "No. I'm not going to fight you. You know I couldn't do that."

Will I ever find a way to reconcile my loyalties to my friends with my loyalty to Dumbledore, or will they always be at odds?

"I'm sorry for upsetting you. This is supposed to be fun, you know," she said from behind him.

"I know," he said, nodding his head.

Suddenly, he felt her arms sliding around him, enclosing him in a tight hug from behind. He felt the warm weight of her head leaning against his back. He reached up to cover her arms with his own. It had been so many years since he had someone to share this sort of affection with. There had been months at a time when he went without ever feeling the touch of another human being. It was as if he hadn't realized he was starving until he was offered a meal--but now that he knew, he wasn't going to give it up. Not for anything.

"If you want to stay behind, I'll understand," she said softly. "Bill and Sirius are going, no matter what. But if you want me to stay here with you--I will. You don't have to be alone."

He shook his head. "You don't have to do that, Nymphadora. I won't keep you away from your concert." He sighed in resignation. "All right. You win," he said.

He felt her pull back from him. With a firm grip on his shoulder, she spun him around to face her, and looked up into his eyes. "What do you mean, I win?" she asked.

He smiled wanly down at her. "I mean--you win. We can go to the concert."

Her eyes lit up again, with a smile spreading infectiously across her face. "You too?"

He nodded. "Me too."

"I win!" she squealed, flinging her arms up in victory, and bouncing up and down in delight.

He laughed. "I can't guarantee that I won't regret it."

She threw her arms around him in another tight hug, which he was happy to return. "You won't regret it!" she said. "I won't let you."

He held her tight for another moment, savoring the feeling of having her in his arms. Then he released her, and stepped back. "So what now?" he asked.

"Now," she said with a grin. "We get you ready to go!"

"What getting ready do I need to do?"

"You need to change your clothes."

"What's wrong with the ones I have on?" he asked, looking down at his navy jumper and khaki trousers, covered with a dull brown robe.

She rolled her eyes again. She did that a lot around him. "You can't go to a Weird Sisters concert dressed like that!" she said.

"My clothes are all pretty much like these," he replied.

"I know," she said. "That's why I took the liberty of picking something up for you." She walked to the dining table, and picked up a bag that she had dropped on it when she first walked in to the room.

"Here," she said, holding the bag out to him. "This is a perfectly acceptable rock-concert-going outfit for you."

He took the bag apprehensively. "Are you sure it will fit?"

She nodded. "I looked into your wardrobe and checked your sizes while you were away." He wasn't sure how he felt about her rifling through his room, but at least he wouldn't have to wear ill-fitting garments all night. However, based on what she and Bill were wearing, he wasn't sure he would want to wear the contents of the bag no matter how well they fit.

Clearly his apprehension was visible, because Nymphadora spoke up. "Don't look so worried. Trust me--you'll look fine. Its just black trousers and a blue shirt--nothing outlandish."

"All right," he said hesitantly. "I suppose I'll head up to my room and give them a try."

"Brilliant!" she exclaimed, giving him one last hug. "We'll see you back in the parlor in few minutes."

They both headed out of the dining room, and he made his way upstairs while she went back to the parlor--no doubt to spread the good news of his acquiescence.

Black trousers and blue shirt, he thought. It can't be that bad--can it?

He should have known better.