Kissing Hermione

Harry searched around in his bag while the other boys in his dorm slept. "Crap! I must have left it in the common room! Hermione and Ron were there when I left, but what if they forget to grab it? Then someone could steal it..."

Making up his mind, he crept across the room and made his way down the stairs to the common room in order to retrieve his invisibility cloak. He had just reached the bottom of the stairs when he heard shouting. He peaked through a crack in the door, and his suspicions were confirmed. Ron and Hermione were both red in the face, screaming at each other.

Not again...Harry thought. Normally these fights, although more frequent than ever, didn't last very long. So Harry decided to wait outside until it had settled down enough for him to enter.

"What do you mean 'I don't notice things'?! I notice plenty!!" Ron demanded.

"The only thing you ever notice is when I'm in, according to you, 'a bitchy mood'!!!" spat Hermione.

"That's because it happens so often, I've become familiarized with it!!!" he retorted.

"Well it's too bad you can't notice anything else, because you obviously haven't noticed why I do it, have you?!!!!" she screamed.

Ron mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like "menstrual cycle", but Hermione didn't seem to have heard it.

"I'll tell you why," she growled, "it's because you're such an insensitive, whiny prat, I can't help but get mad!"

Ron looked mortally wounded by this statement. "M-me?" he gasped. "I'm insensitive?! You never respect my feelings, you treat me like a child, a criminal, and you, you...you're almost abusive!!"

Hermione snorted. "Oh come on, Ron.." she said mockingly.

"See? Right there! You're belittling me! You're the one who's insensitive!!"

"How am I insensitive? I'm not the one who didn't want to tell Harry!" she screeched.

Tell me what? Harry thought.

"Oh, yeah? Well now it looks like we don't have to!!" Ron said harshly.

"Wh-what are you saying?" said Hermione, her voice trembling.

"I'm saying," he continued quietly, "that it's over." Hermione started crying profusely.

What? What's over? Harry wondered.

Then Ron, looking horrified, suddenly said, "Wait! I didn't mean that! Please!! I don't want to break up!!"

Harry's jaw nearly hit the floor. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Ron and Hermione were going out?

"I don't want to break up either," she said faintly, "but we really need to work on this. Give me some time to, um, think about whether we should..."

Ron gaped at her. Hermione shook her head. "I need to think." And with that, she made for the door. Right where Harry was standing. Wanting desperately to escape the chew out he would get for eavesdropping, Harry started to move. Before Hermione had reached the door however, she turned and added, "Ron, maybe if you were more attentive, I might consider...." she trailed off, looking ready to cry once more. They stood in silence for a few seconds. Then she slowly turned, and headed through the door, up the stairs, and out of sight, while Harry hid in the shadows.

He watched Ron walk to the sofa and flop down, pressing his palms to his eyes. Harry turned towards stairs and started to walk back up. He had planned to return to the dormitories and wait for Ron come up before attempting to retrieve his cloak, but in the absence of yelling, his footsteps had suddenly become easily detectable and his presence was exposed.

"Is someone there?"

Uh,oh. Thought Harry.

"Harry? Is it you? I need to talk to you." Ron said pleadingly. Feeling obligated, Harry quietly made his way back to the common room and entered.

"What's up?" Harry said lamely. Then added, "Is it Hermione?" In what he hoped was an innocent voice.

Ron sat up. "How did you kn- ? Um, yeah, it is."

They sat for several agonizingly awkward moments until...

"How long have you been going out?" Harry asked boldly.

"WHAT?!"

Ron looked positively terrified.

"I, uh, accidentally heard something," said Harry sheepishly. He wanted to ask why Ron hadn't wanted to tell him, but he let it go.

"So you're okay with it?" Ron asked hesitantly.

Harry rapidly scanned his emotions. He revisited all the instances in which he'd suspected something; all the times he'd seen Ron's face light up...

"Why wouldn't I be? It's cool."

Ron looked almost unburdened, and he even let out a sigh of relief. "Well, I guess you would have found out sooner or later," he said with a sad smile.

"Why did I have to suggest we break up?! Why?" Ron suddenly exploded. "I just gave her the idea. Handed it to her on a platter, all because I didn't think before speaking. And now she'll never let it go. She actually liked the idea. God, I'm such an idiot." His face contorted painfully as he relived his mistake.

"I-...So, what's it like to... kiss her?"

Harry did not know where this question came from. Perhaps it was because Ron looked so sad that Harry wanted to get his mind off things by having him focus on a happy thought. He figured that would be a pretty happy thought indeed.

"Oh, yeah," Ron said slowly, his teary eyes suddenly lighting up. "Well, um, don't tell anybody, especially not her, because she would hate me to say any part of her armored exterior was 'soft', but, you know how her.. um.. lips look really soft?"

"Umm, no."

"But in reality," he continued, "They're even softer. They're kind've like... petals actually. You know, silky, but not glossy. And she'll move her bottom lip just so, and it will kind of make it feel like the molecules in your lip are melding with hers."

He looked somewhat embarrassed, but Harry's earnest expression seemed to embolden Ron. He went on, "It just feels endless the longer you go for, too. After a while, it feels like nothing exists but her, and you start to focus on everything about her. The texture of her shirt, the layers of curls and waves in her hair, the fact that the tip of her nose is always sort of cold...

And her lips kind of remind me of...well, maple butter, really. They're kind of sweet, and the skin around them tastes like milk, kind of, honey milk. And her hair always smells like this certain kind of flower, so the combination is just... it tastes good, Harry.

And you get really nervous too, like you're climbing a high tree. 'Cause you feel safe and secure, but you still can't help getting more fluttery the higher you climb."

His face suddenly fell. "And whenever we would fight," he added, "it would be like a branch breaking under my feet."

Ron stopped, and Harry saw his eyes water again. "How could I have let her get away without telling her I love her?"

"OH, RON!!!!!!" came a tear-filled voice.

Ron jerked his head around as Hermione came rushing in. "Her-mmghf!!" Ron managed to gasp as Hermione threw herself onto his lips. Harry could actually see Ron practically melt in her arms. He looked beyond blissful.

"I heard what you said about me, about kissing me," she said dreamily. "I take it back, you do notice stuff. I can't believe it! I was actually coming down to tell you it wouldn't work out, but then I heard you talking to Harry, and it was so beautiful, I just listened by the door."

Harry slowly crept across the room, grabbed his cloak, and closed the door firmly behind him, grinning to himself.