The Edge of Sanity

Chapter 1- Beginning at the End

Ginny sat hugging her knees, alone and naked on the cold, damp, stone floor of the bathroom. Her face was still wet and tearstained even though she had stopped crying a long time ago. With a shuddering sigh, she slowly raised herself from the floor and glanced at the mirror.

A tired-looking, sixteen year old girl stared back at her. She would have been quite pretty if it weren't for the dark rings of fatigue around her sombre brown eyes, or the dull, once-vibrant, red hair that hung lifelessly around her pale face and draped over her shoulders which were far too bony. Ginny could remember a time when she had quite liked her figure, but her body now repulsed her. Her ribs and hip-bones protruded dangerously from under her pale skin. Her frail arms and legs looked as if they could brake at the lightest of touches.

The thing that Ginny despised most about her appearance were the disfiguring, self-induced scars that occupied much of the flesh of her upper thighs. She blinked away the tears as she averted her gaze from her sickening reflection.

She moved slowly over to the bath that was now beginning to overflow, her feet slapping against the wet floor. She leaned over to turn the taps off and felt hot steam wash over her face, making her skin tight. Climbing over the side of the tub, her skin smarted as it touched the hot water. She lowered herself in slowly, more water lapping over the edges, her pale skin reddening as the water burned her. She didn't care that it was too hot.

She sat for several minutes, staring absent-mindedly at a cobweb in the corner, her mind utterly blank. Suddenly her focus changed and she looked at the empty soap holder. From a crack in the wall behind it, she retrieved a small metallic object. Clutching it tightly between her left thumb and forefinger, she pressed it hard against her right wrist. She dragged the razor through her flesh towards her elbow. She felt the sting of pain, but Ginny didn't let out a sound.

She watched as the deep wound gradually filled with blood, which then flowed steadily down her arm, crimson drops dancing on the surface of the water. She tried to grip the razor with her right hand, but it was shaking so badly she dropped it. She reached for her wand instead, and held it as best she could.

Pointing it at her left wrist, she whispered, "Sectumsempra!" There was a flash of green light and Ginny felt her whole arm sear with excruciating pain. Three long, deep gashes appeared on her wrist and upper arm. She let out a small gasp simply because she had never used the curse before and hadn't expected such results, but she didn't cry. Her wand made a loud clatter on the stone floor as she carelessly tossed it.

Ginny lowered herself almost completely under the pink water until only a small part of her face broke the surface. She stared at the ceiling, her eyes blank and unseeing. All she could hear was the sound of her heart beating furiously in her ears. The pain in her arms began to subside and turned into a dull throbbing. Ginny immediately regretted taking the Muggle pain killers she had swallowed earlier. She wanted the pain. She needed it.

The water was getting darker and darker, the clear pink turning to a brilliant ruby red. The hammering heartbeat in her ears gradually became fainter and fainter as her life ebbed away. She could feel herself slipping into unconsciousness. She closed her eyes, and a solitary tear escaped down the side of her face. She searched her mind and memory, trying to find a thought to hold onto, trying to remember how it had all come to this.

Ginny's memory lazily wandered back to a time when things had been much different.