Touchstone

~Touchstone~

Chapter Five

By Gin

He held his eyes closed while he waited for the light to dim. When he opened them, the room was just starting to come into focus again just like the last time. It looked the same, but this time he decided to head over to the bookshelf while he waited for Hermione to enter. He wondered what her mind would fill a bookcase with. He ran his delicate fingers over the leather bound edges and glanced at the titles. Almost all of them were familiar. There was an especially nice section of Muggle poetry. Muggles were really the better poets; wizards just didn't invest enough time in literature. She had collections of Byron, Tennyson, and Arnold to name a few. He reached out to a compilation of poems by Arnold when he heard her shuffle into the room. Her appearance had most definitely not improved since their last meeting. He stiffened and moved towards her.

"Professor."

"Miss Granger." Her breathing was strained, but she tried to conceal it. He motioned for the chairs and she slowly made her way over. He patiently waited, diverting his attention so as not to make her even more uncomfortable in her awkwardness, but kept her in the corner of his eye. When she made it to the chair, her knees gave out and she caught her breath. He noticed a thin layer of perspiration across her forehead. Her very life force was slowly ebbing away, it worried him. He needed to move fast.

"How are you feeling today?" He sat down next to her, scooting his chair close. 'Invade her space.'

She met his gaze, "I don't. Why do you think I'm here?" He met it back coolly and imperceptibly nodded.

"Have you thought any on what I said yesterday?"

"Yesterday........." Her gaze lowered as she thought. "I'm sorry, I lose track of time." She paused for a moment. Snape kept his eyes on her. "I did. Now may I ask you a question?" Snape inclined his head. "Why do you keep coming back? I have made my decision-"

"Then why did you let me in?" he asked sardonically.

"Because I wanted to tell you, so you could tell them......whoever 'them' is." She closed her eyes and leaned back into the chair.

Snape sighed exasperated. "Hermione-"

"No," she said quietly. "There is nothing. Nothing to go back to, don't you see? I. Can't. Take. More. Pain!" Her chin wobbled. "I just can't. I'm so tired. I just want to go......can you understand?"

He stood up and paced back and forth. 'Like a frustrated lion' she thought, 'how ironic.' "Miss Granger, have you been living in a cave for the past decade?" She blinked. "You don't-"'Talk about the pot calling the kettle black indeed......' "Miss Granger, I have had nothing for longer than your life. And yet look at me. I have not given up and shamefully banished myself into my own recesses." 'Yet.' She continued to stare. He stopped and looked at her. "You do have something to live for."

"Like what!?! They're all dead!" Her eyes widened at that recognition and she quickly closed them. 'Don't think about it, don't think about it, don't think about it.........'

He watched her, so much pain. She needed to know at least this. "No. Not everyone," he said quietly. Her eyes snapped open. "Harry...... isn't dead." Her lips parted in shock. He wouldn't say anymore. Not yet. He felt awful. Gods, looking at her made him depressed. The fact that another human was capable of feeling like him was frightening to him. He wanted to comfort her and he didn't know why. It wasn't his place, he had no feelings for her that he could recall, but seeing her in that state made his heart squeeze painfully. "You......haven't lost everything. You have yourself, you can feel. You have a brilliant mind, and a promising career to go back to, Hermione you could be anything you want. You mustn't do this. Besides, Albus is counting on you returning; as is the rest of the staff. And, you have to go back to Harry. He will assuredly need you." He watched her expression.

She sat still hugging her arms to herself. "Harry is.........but I thought-"

"Just barely."

"Oh. How bad?" Snape wouldn't meet her eyes this time. "But he's not going to make it either is he." It was more a statement than a question. The terrifying images were again hovering just outside of comprehension. She shook her head. "I can't," a tear slipped down her cheek.

Snape strode over to her chair and knelt down, his hand over her arm squeezing. "You can. You have to," his eyes bore into hers. Hermione stiffened.

"No!! Here! This is what I can't go back to!" Her eyes blazed and the room grew black. The fire died and there was nothing but black. She started rocking back and forth. "If I go back, then they come!" There was a deep rumbling sound somewhere. She raised her hands to her face and shook her head fighting it off. "They're there..........always lingering," she gasped. "They never let me rest. I can hear them......"her lips trembled. "I can hear them screaming for me......I can see them die, oh......"

Suddenly there was light on the hidden walls. And images. Memories. He heard Hermione whimper and looked around. The ceiling and walls played like a film from an unseen projector.

There was a cozy house. Hermione was there with her parents. Then there was a blast at the front door and her mother screamed. Snape felt a warm shivering body pressed against him and he wrapped his arms around her and watched. Above him wizards in dark robes and white masks trooped in and bound them all to walls. Her father yelled, her mother shrieked. Hermione was crying desperate pleas. The Death Eaters began torturing her father and then turned their sick attentions to her mother. Hermione was forced to watch as they raped and hurt her parents in their living room. Blood was flowing freely from her parents' mangled bodies as large magic induced gashes and bruises appeared from nowhere. There limp bodies were being moved around like a macabre puppet show and she watched the light go out of their eyes. She screamed helplessly, begging for mercy when they turned towards her laughing mirthlessly. Faceless men touched and cursed her.

'Crucio! You will obey us you little Mudblood bitch!' Behind him, on the other wall shouts were heard as Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and a few other Aurors barged in and hexes and curses flew everywhere.

The rumbling increased as the next memory became visible. Hermione sneaking around an old house. A man screaming...Snape recognized it as his own voice. Hermione's breath was ragged as she tried to quietly invade the residence. She stealthily crept throughout the house and to the room where Snape was being tortured. Malfoy and his new recruits were there cursing Snape. Like a flash, Hermione cast stupefy repeatedly and somehow avoided being hit herself. Lucius had hidden behind the table Snape lay on, dazedly, and reached for something, tapped it and vanished. She rushed up to Snape and ran her fingers over his face gently. Then she closed his wounds, sent up a locating charm for the Aurors nearby to take the remaining Death Eaters and Apparated them to safety.

The rumbling sound grew even louder still, as did Hermione's trembles. More images appeared on the wall in front of him and he held her in the dark. Dumbledore was there telling Snape and other members of the Order of the Phoenix this would be the last battle. Hermione stared heartlessly at the Headmaster and nodded. Then all of the walls displayed images of scenes going on all around him. The field where the sides of good and evil had met. There were angry jets of sparks swirling around them and Snape ducked a couple of times, shielding Hermione as best he could. People were falling like stones everywhere. Screams and then a bright light, just over a hill. Dumbledore and his followers were emerging. They pointed they're wands at their enemies and set to work, killing the dark minions.

Beside Hermione's image Fred Weasley was killed and she and George dropped to his side. George cried out and with renewed hatred fiercely attacked every Death Eater in sight. Behind her, Neville caught a bad curse and sank to his knees cringing in pain. Hermione then caught a hex in her shoulder jerking her around. Crabbe and Goyle were advancing on her with their wands out. Her left arm hung limply at her side. An intense look of pure hate blazed from her eyes as she cast Avada Kedavra; it just missed Goyle. Then Crabbe reached into his robes and pulled something out. She couldn't make out what it was before Goyle seized her, but not after a well placed engorging charm. He cried out, and Crabbe grabbed him and tapped the object in his hand.

The next image was of her in a cold and damp dungeon. Malfoy senior and Voldemort were there.

'Oh yes.........we can use her,' the Dark Lord sneered. 'Place her over there,' Voldemort dismissed them and slowly walked over to her. 'Now you will see how your futile devotion to that old fool has failed you......'

Soon afterwards Harry and Ron appeared, Snape knew it was from a locating charm he had placed on her before; so if just such an occurrence should happen he could find her. Apparently Harry and Ron had thought to do so as well and had arrived before he could. Ron dove for Hermione, shielding her and Harry aimed his wand at Voldemort. However, Malfoy quickly spelled out some chains and Harry fell against their force. Ron with a last glance at his best friends yelled "Avada Ke-"

"NOO!!!" Hermione yelled and tried to pull Ron away.

"Get back you stupid little Mudblood!" Voldemort flicked his hands and Hermione went flying into the wall.

*FLASH!!!* Green light lit up the room and a harsh gasp was heard as the body of Ron Weasley collapsed on the floor...

"Hermione! Move!"

"Harry no!" Harry Potter stood up against the chains and shoved a shocked Hermione out of the way as she desperately grabbed for her fallen friend. He shot off curses at Malfoy and Voldemort again flicked his wrists sending Harry sailing back hitting the stone wall with a crack. His head lolled about and he tried to look up. Hermione was frozen in place, Ron was lying dead on the ground near her feet.

"Harry Potter! You come to finally meet your death..." The high-pitched raspy voice rang out in the room.

"Crucio!" The curse was directed at Hermione and she screamed and convulsed under it while Voldemort laughed. Harry fought against the chains that held him to the wall.

"Leave her alone you bastard!" Tears stung his eyes as he watched his best friend writhe in pain when a dark figure snuck into the room. Voldemort's wand twitched effectively cutting off the curse on Hermione. She lay exhausted and spasming on the ground.

"Oh Harry, I am going to enjoy this...You have no idea the kind of strain I have been experiencing while waiting for you." He edged closer. "But I think I've waited patiently." Severus clung to back wall of the room in the shadows waiting. Malfoy had his wand trained on Hermione and was trembling with anticipation.

Voldemort raised his wand and trailed it along Harry's cheek. Harry screamed in pain. He pointed it back at Harry grinning with his serpentine mouth. "Alienomentum," he hissed. Hermione watched in horror as Harry's head twitched and his eyes bulged. Then it stopped. Voldemort and Malfoy laughed. Then Voldemort motioned to Lucius and he put Hermione under Cruciatus again as Voldemort continued ravaging Harry's mind.

Then Snape emerged. "Avada Kedavra!" he bellowed pointing his wand at Malfoy and easily killing him; Malfoy's lifeless face registering shock more than pain. Then Voldemort turned. Harry hung limply against the wall.

"Severus! My lost little snake...how appropriate that you join us tonight." Snape cautiously moved around Voldemort, wand out drawing his attention away from the now moving body of Harry Potter.

"Yes. I rather had hoped to see you die, once and for all." Snape ducked out of the way to Hermione's twitching body as Harry Potter raised his arms and focused all his remaining energy on Voldemort, and shouted "AVADA KEDAVRA!!!" The familiar green light exploded from Harry Potter's body as the Killing Curse was hurled at Voldemort. The Dark Lord screamed and hissed......and fell on the ground. His reign of terror was now over.

Hermione raised her head weakly as Snape rushed over to Harry's side. She watched him as he checked over the younger man. It suddenly grew very cold in Hermione's conscious and without thinking Snape huddled further into her.

"Harry?" Snape felt for a pulse and took him off the wall. He quickly checked for a pulse again. "Harry?! No...Harry!" Then the memories faded to black as Hermione gave up......

The rumbling had disappeared, the lights slowly came back to their original golden hue and Snape registered tears on his neck and Hermione shaking violently. He wrapped his arms tighter around her and mentally tried to calm himself down. 'Merlin......that was different...' It wasn't that the images were anything new to him, Merlin knew how many atrocious "activities" he'd been forced to endure; but seeing them through Hermione's eyes, and almost feeling her own pain had gotten to him. His mind suddenly recalled the gentle touch she'd given him when she'd found him that night. She really was a strong person to have gone through what she had, right up until the end....

He held her as she calmed down. It bothered him that she wouldn't let it all out. Maybe she couldn't in here. He had to get her out. He stroked her cheek and tilted her chin up to his face. "Hermione..." She finally met his eyes with her own tear-filled ones. She turned her face away from his and made to get up- she was so weak. Snape then felt a nagging sensation in his body and looked at Hermione, she was pushing him away.

She turned back to him and said, "You need to leave......I need to go." He looked at her worriedly.

"What does that mean?" No response. "Will I be able to come back tomorrow?" he hoped he didn't sound as anxious to her as he did to himself. Gods, he felt weak. She gave a wan smile and closed her eyes. Snape felt himself slowly wake back in his chair in the hospital wing, panting for air, and still holding Hermione's hands. He felt his eyes gloss over with tears, and he slowly leant on the bed and then there was nothing.

~*~*~*~