Crying for the Untamed

Disclaimer: Harry Potter © J. K. Rowling & Warner Bros.

Crying for the Untamed

By: Footnote
(MPP FOREVER!)

The sun was setting on the little corner coffee shop nestled stereotypically in a bustling little English town. It was a weekday, and therefore customer traffic had been lukewarm at best. Remus Lupin calmly observed all this, as he had been for the last hour or so, over a still-steaming mug of caramel latte. He was due to meet with someone very soon; he’d just decided to show up an hour early to enjoy himself in the coffee shop’s soothing and relaxing atmosphere.

He had chosen this table for a reason: its proximity to the door and to the window just next to it. It also gave him a view of the whole coffee shop, which he quite enjoyed. There was a small couch in the low-lighted back portion of the back of the cafe, which was dim anyway due to the setting sun. On this couch a couple sat deep in conversation that involved being less than an inch from each other. A few kids younger than he was were playing the arcade games near the two lovers. Halfway between himself and the couple was the little counter, displaying varieties of cheesecakes and scones to go with your coffee. There were paintings for sale on the walls and there was a young woman sitting beneath one of them, scribbling madly away in her notebook, her dark hair dangling, unnoticed, in front of her dark eyes.

The tinkling of the bell above the door caught his attention. With a flick of long, wavy red hair, Lily Evans came through the tinted glass doors. She wore her normal green jumper and blue jeans with the knee ripped open. She spotted Remus and motioned toward the counter, where she stood to place her order.

Remus smiled subtly to himself. Lily was certainly a pretty girl, especially in the dim golden light of the coffee shop that gave her a strangely heavenly glow in her coppery hair. He watched Lily’s mum drive away through the window behind him as he was leaning against the thick glass. He, on the other hand, had come here via Floo powder to a discreet wizard restaurant down the street by the name of Half Full.

By this time, Lily had bought her beverage of choice and was approaching the table for two by the window at which sat Remus who was enjoying the atmosphere of the little coffee shop at much as its other patrons. He lazily watched her under half-lidded eyes; feeling content and satisfied as only coffee could really make him feel.

"Hello Remus," Lily smiled and sat down while flipping a stray lock of fire over her right shoulder. "How long have you been waiting?"

Remus set down his mug silently, "Not long, really. I just came here early to enjoy the atmosphere."

Lily smiled and sipped the flavored iced tea, her green eyes sparkling, "Typical..."

"So how’s summer coming?" Remus turned in his chair to face Lily better. She made a face as if to say, "Now why did you have to go and ask that?" It was the face Sirius made when Remus referred to an ex-girlfriend.

"Pretty boring, really. Petunia, of course, is squawking about worse than ever," Lily rolled her emerald eyes. "It doesn’t help that I passed my learner’s test and she didn’t, claiming that I used magic to steal answers and to ruin her score." Remus got the impression that this was a long-argued topic.

"But doesn’t she know that the Ministry would have sent an owl if you had?" he asked thoughtfully.

"I tried to explain that!" Lily huffed, blowing a few stray red strands out of her eyes. She sighed, "But Tuna won’t listen."

Remus smiled, his eyes still not quite all the way open, "Sibling rivalry." He’d never know about that, as he had no brothers or sisters. After he was bitten, he figured that it was taxing enough on his parents to worry about him than to have the added weight of a small child to worry about on full moons.

There was a moment or two of silence, during which Lily fidgeted and chewed her lower lip in obvious nervousness. She was wiggling about in her chair as if it was burning her and bouncing her feet so enthusiastically that the ice in her tea was clinking rhythmically. She was obviously very anxious about something.

"What’s wrong?" Remus asked in concern, finally opening his eyes to normal size for him. Lily turned to him, eyes filled with worry and brooding then flicked towards the quiet twilight out then windows. Her profile was that of a mother that was waiting up for her tardy child to come home.

"James asked me out," she murmured, as if afraid someone might hear or that saying it would break it, making it all a lie. The statement seemed as fragile as glass.

Remus raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. James had been fancying her for ages; he was merely surprised that Prongs had actually screwed up the courage to ask her. "Really?" There was faint amusement the Marauder's voice.

Lily nodded hesitantly, still biting her lip so firmly that Remus was afraid she'd make it bleed.

"And what did you say?"

"I told him to give me a day." Remus knew that this day was not a pleasant one for James. He envisioned his friend pacing back and forth in the Potter’s estate biting his lips much in the way of the object of his affections. Remus smiled and shook his head. Poor James.

"And what do you think you should do?" he asked, the picture of sincerity painted in his eyes.

"I’m tempted," Lily smiled nervously as she glanced at Remus, whose smile widened at her answer, "but he’s just so quiet..."

Remus grinned and almost laughed, "James? Quiet?" He goggled in disbelief before mocking a scoff, "And I gave birth to Dumbledore."

Lily giggled nervously at the image of Remus in labor and screaming obscenities at the doctors before returning to the matter at hand. "He just seems...I guess the word is 'domesticated.' There’s nothing wrong with that of course," she said quickly at Remus’s quirked eyebrow. "It’s just that it’s not what I look for in a guy," she finished matter-of-factly.

“What would that be, exactly?” Remus asked slowly, his tone of voice said that he simply would like to know for future reference, not really that he was interested himself. Lily knew he would never willingly be interested, in her or any other female or anyone on this planet or any other.

Lily shrugged. "There’s a lot of things," she said slowly. "Intellectual...smart and capable, sincere, beautiful inwardly, argumentative, opinionated," she paused, "Dominate but not domineering, and above all, they must have the right mix of wild and tender."

Remus looked at her thoughtfully, eyes wide with contemplation, "Elaborate on that last one."

"Remus, you know already that I like people who are misunderstood." Remus nodded. "I like ‘em sweet and sour," Lily continued, "I’d rather ride off on a Harley-Davidson that to be escorted in a limo. I like a wild side, someone who simply cannot be embarrassed or afraid of things. Someone who’d I’d have to restrain instead of the other way around." Remus gazed at her thoughtfully, allowing her time to think.

There was a long, anticipating pause.

"So," Lily said slowly, timidly, "How does James score?"

"James?" Remus blinked out of his thoughts. A short hesitation, then, "All of the above. Probably a little sweeter than sour, but he’ll steal a ride on a Harley any day for you."

Lily blanched. "That’s just it, Remus!" she groaned, "I don’t want him to do it for me. I want him to do it because it is in his nature to do it."

Remus nodded thoughtfully, "I understand your point of view. And it is in his nature to do it. The idea just hasn’t occurred to him yet." He shrugged, "That’s James for you: excellent on elaboration, not so great on actual creation."

Lily smiled and bowed her head, "You always know what to say, Remus. That’s why everyone loves you so much," she looked up and smiled.

Remus, however, blinked in surprise before looking out the window at the fading light, all the talk of romance reminded him once again of something he could never had. "I'm not so sure about everyone," he commented softly.

Lily gave him a heartbroken look, one he did not see until he turned back to her, loneliness pooled in his dark twilight irises. Remus tried to cover this from observation, but Lily was more attuned to him and his emotions that the Marauders were. It also didn't help that his eyes were so bloody big. He knew the eyes were the windows to your soul. He also knew that while everyone else got normal, relatively small windows, he got big bay picture windows to add icing to his bitter cake.

Before he could turn away again and bottle it all up again and bury away from the sight of outsiders, Lily did something he didn’t expect or even thought possible: she leaned forward and kissed him. It was just a quick peck to grace his lips, too fast for him to even really respond, even if he wanted to. All he could really do was widen his already large eyes in shock, staring straight ahead at nothing in particular.

When his eyes finally refocused, Lily seemed to be waiting for some sort of rebuke, once again biting her lip, yet this time, guiltily. "I’m sorry," she murmured.

Remus shook his head to tell Lily not to worry about anything and to clear his mind. He made a dismissive gesture with his left hand then asked, "It's just...why?"

Only a short pause. "Many reasons," Lily replied slowly. "First off you seemed to need a distraction from that horrible look on your face," she smiled and they chuckled briefly before Lily grew sincere again, "Because you are lost, little Remus Lupin. You, Moony, are a beautiful soul, you know."

He blinked. Lily continued.

"Now I may not be too great at anything...except maybe Charms," she added quickly at Remus’s once again raised eyebrow. "But I can see when people are hurting, and you're hurting about as much as someone can hurt." She paused at Remus’s expression; an unreadable mix of pain, gratitude, appreciation, and surprise. Her voice dropped to a whisper, "If there is anything I can do to ease anyone’s suffering, especially someone as undeserving of such as you, then, dammit, what is a kiss in the face of all that?"

They fell silent. Lily sighed and looked out the dark window at the night-goers outside. The street lights were turning on and the last indigo-ish blue in the sky, the same as Remus' eye color, faded to the denim black that the night became in the city. Remus continued to stare at her, unmoving, unblinking, with a softly strangled, stricken look sculpted in his features. It was just enough expression to really be there.

Lily watched his reflection in the dark, mirror-like glass, noting that there was never a time in Remus’s existence that he didn’t look as angelic as he did now. He wide, calculating ocean twilight eyes were filled with wordless emotion. Lily wondered if this was how the angels looked Christ hung on the cross: a strange mix of sorrow, joy, and acceptance.

"Remus, please, if you don’t change your facial expression," Lily began, "I’m afraid I’ll be forced to burst into tears."

Remus blinked. He blinked again. He inhaled and exhaled a sharp, shaky breath, then burst into laughter. Not his usual cynical chuckle, but real laughter, full of mirth.

Lily blinked. She blinked again. The she joined in, giggling as only the girl that James liked so much could.

As their merriment subsided, Remus whispered, "Thank you, Lily, but I don’t need anyone’s pity," and bowed his head in gratitude nonetheless.

"Who said anything about pity?" Lily studied her nails, her voice back to her almost I-am-a-Feminist! tone, "I said I was here for you, in the same way I’m here for Rosmerta and Poppy and you pathetic bozos that call yourselves Marauders." Lily winked, "And you’re welcome. Just remember what I said. Find help when you need it. Don’t be too proud or arrogant or insolent or cocky or so completely MALE that you don’t seek it."

Remus nodded, then saluted, "Yes, ma’am! I will not be a Sirius clone!" They laughed before quieting down to earnestness. "I’ll keep it in mind, Lily, but I’m fine right now as I have always been."

Lily grinned, but it did not reach her eyes, "I knew you were gonna say that."

Remus averted his eyes downwards, offering a tiny smiled of his own, knowing that his behavior was predicted well.

"So," Lily began after a few minutes of silence that was interrupted with only the sipping of drinks. "We’ve heard about my summer. How has yours been?"

"Well," Remus began, "Sirius, Peter, and I have been talking about what we’re going to do when we graduate. Peter was going to stay with his family. That’s where he is now, as a matter of fact, family reunion, while Sirius and I were going to brave the Real World."

Lily smiled and continued to listen, though she allowed herself to imagine the state of a living space inhabited by two barely adult boys.

"We’ve decided that we were going to start out renting a place and then buy it. James will be fine, whatever he does, with his inheritance and the fact that he and Sirius are competing for top of the class."

Lily blinked in surprise, "What about you? You’re pretty smart, too, you know."

Remus shrugged, and then grinned, "I said they were competing for top of the class, I didn’t say with whom they were competing."

Lily laughed and lightly punched him on his shoulder. Exactly the way James does, thought Remus.

"Sly devil," Lily narrowed her eyes and tisked, wagging her finger at him.

"Well, with all the points we’ve cost Gryffindor, we ought to at least try to win them back." The pair grinned again.

"I’ll drink to that!" Lily exclaimed and raised her glass. There was the clink of heavy cups colliding and they smiled. A comfortable silence fell between them, Lily twiddling her thumbs and Remus staring into the flecks of cinnamon that floated across the surface of his coffee. The cafe was blessedly quiet and dim with Sting singing his jazzy blues in the background.

"Well," Remus began, setting his almost-empty mug down with a light clink, "What do you think you are going to tell James?"

Lily smiled and looked about with a flirtatious glint in her jaden eyes, "Well..." her grin widened, "He’s nice and smart and sweet and so cute with those little glasses and he's good at Quidditch—" She cut off when she saw the totally goofy grin on Remus’s face.

Lily was taken aback and narrowed her eyes in suspicion, "Who are you and what have you done with Remus and how did you get here so fast?" Remus laughed out loud.

"I take it that you’ve accepted his offer," he said as his laughter subsided.

Lily nodded, with feeling. Her eyes little upside down U's of happiness.

Remus sobered and steepled his hands in front of him, his elbows on the table and leaned his chin on his thumbs, "You guys are already a cute couple."

Lily blushed and giggled, "Thank you, Remus." She drained the last of her tea.

"One little thing, though, that I must add...it's imperative..." Moony began.

"Yes...?"

"Send him an owl TONIGHT so he can actually get some sleep." Their laughter rang through the little café once again.

Lily grinned goofily until she looked down at her watch, "Bloody hell! I thought it was later. I’ve still got a while before I need to go home."

Remus stood, however, "Well, the Marauders are due to return to the Lupin residence tonight for wild drinking, drugs, and you mix in the hookers and you've got yourself a party."

Lily quirked an eyebrow at this statement.

Remus shrugged and continued, rolling his eyes, "Mum said that we’d better be quiet this time or she’ll lock us in the garden."

"And your mum would do it, too," Lily agreed and stood. They walked out of the café together, the little brass bell tingling again as the door closed behind them. The street outside was dark and cold and oddly empty of people. They figured that everyone who had come to this road had already gotten where they needed to go, which was pretty said since it was relatively early still. There were hardly any cars in the streets, but Lily suspected that this was normal as this was mostly a wizarding section. A sound, nonetheless, caught her attention.

"Oh! Oh, listen!" Lily stopped as a mechanical war cry purred through the evening air. Remus focused on it as well, feeling the tingling vibrations undulate in the air with his heightened senses. The sound got louder as the magnificent machine approached. Suddenly, a black motorcycle skidded around the corner, its rider helmetless and bathed in the blur of speed. The roar grew louder and the rider neared them, they could make out shortish black hair and light gleaming off glasses or goggles on the rider’s face. He turned to look at them as he passed and Lily drew a sharp breath.

James.

Lily turned to Remus, who was staring just as wide-eyed as she was when she realized that the sound had softened to almost a whisper. Turning back around, she saw that James had stopped at the corner and was looked just as surprised as her and Remus.

James licked his lips, "Lily?" He coughed, "Remus?"

Just then, a roar nearly identical to the previous one filled the air as another black motorcycle cleared the corner, this one had a streak of longer black hair above it.

It was Sirius.

"Hey Prongs! Well, the ungulate is a good hunter after all." He laughed and came to a halt next to James. "Just the two we’ve been wondering about." Sirius grinned mischievously. At this point, one could tell there was a difference in the bikes. James’ bike was tinged with crimson and gold, a Gryffindor to the very heart. Sirius’s had an emblem emblazoned that was hard to see in the dark, but it looked like is said Dog Star on it.

Lily, Remus, and James, continued to stare in silence.

"Yo, Moony!" Sirius called suddenly. "Need a lift?" He fired the engine of the great black motor beast.

Remus nodded, if somewhat numbly, "You know where to go, right?"

"’Course I do!" Sirius snorted as Remus threw his leg over the curved leather seat. "See ya later, Prongs!" Sirius called and kicked off, Remus hanging on for dear life and the tires screeched and the engine flared.

James was left standing there with his hands on the handlebars and the engine still purring with only Lily for company. Lily had her eyes locked on his.

He licked his lips again; dark blue eyes alight with a strange glow, as if he had dragons in his stomach instead of butterflies. "Do you need a ride somewhere?" he asked cautiously and looked down at his feet.

No answer. Then—

"James?"

"Hmm?" he looked up from the waiting bike.

"Where do you want to go?"

"...Anywhere, as long as you’re with me."

Another pause--

"James?"

"Yes?" He was ready for the worst and hoping for the best. Lily walked towards him and laid a hand over his that was still clutching the handlebar. His knuckles turned white.

"Take me anywhere. Let’s go anywhere." Lily’s eyes were filled with anticipation. She kissed him quickly, harder than she had kissed Remus only moments ago, before swinging her leg over the bike. James grinned as Lily locked her arms around his waist. He fired the engine and they were tearing into the darkness. Lily murmured in James' ear, just over the growl of the engine in the open night, "Let’s go wild!"