After the Fall

Disclaimer: Not Mine

After the Fall

The Ninth Christmas

Richard pushed Hermione into the room ahead of him and quickly closed the door, standing in front of it when she turned to run behind him and leave.

"I see you are a fast learner." Snape stood with a scowl on his face, watching Hermione with eyes that had grown dark with anger. "Whenever things get too much she runs."

"Professor Snape, if I remember correctly," Richard said evenly.

"Professor Hayes," Severus said, nodding toward him but keeping his eyes pinned on Hermione.

"Oh bloody hell." Hermione stomped to the kitchen. "It's Richard and Severus. If we are going to be stuck in here together at least get on a first name basis."

"What would your first name be, Miss Granger?" he sneered at her.

"Gardner," Richard said, following Hermione into the kitchen.

Hermione glared at Snape as he stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame as Richard leaned down and kissed her on the cheek before taking a seat at the table.

"No, I believe when I first met Miss..."

"Okay, Professor, we are done here. I believe you have interfered enough for one day," she hissed at him.

"Vickie?" Richard took her hand in his and looked at her. "What is ...?"

Snape let out a bark of laughter, bringing Hermione to her feet. "So help me, Snape, if you say it I am going to..."

"Why, Miss Granger, I think quite enough has been said for one day." He smirked at her.

"Granger?" Richard looked at Hermione as he stood. "Vickie?"

She turned and looked at him, feeling as if he had thrown ice water at her face. She was finding it difficult to breathe as she lowered her head and started out of the kitchen.

"Running again, Miss Granger?" Snape hissed as she pushed past him. He grabbed her elbow and spun her back to him. "You interfering little bint. You wanted to play this game, now we play it."

Richard was over to them in two strides. He pulled Hermione away from Severus, putting himself between the two.

"Richard! NO!" Hermione screamed, afraid Severus would reach for his wand. "Please, I am fine. He is leaving now. He is, really. Richard, he can hurt you, please don't."

"What is it, Snape? Are you leaving quietly or are we going to have to settle this some other way?" Richard glowered at Severus.

"You want her? That witch?" Severus pointed at Hermione. "Ask her how she plans on getting rid of you. She is good at that. She takes what she needs and then leaves."

Richard tried to take a step toward Severus, raising his arm only to feel Hermione hold on to him, leaning with all her weight on his arm. He tried to push her away and get to Severus, looking down at her he tried to pry her off his arms only to feel her nails dig into his arm.

She saw Severus' right hand go under his left sleeve and knew that was where he kept his wand. She let go of Richard to run to her room where her own wand was on the top shelf of the closet in a box, tucked under years worth of living. Severus took two strides forward and caught her, pulling her to him.

"Where is it?" He could feel her heart beat against his chest as he held her tightly. "I will know before I leave. If you think you know me and what I am capable of you only know the tip of it."

Richard took Hermione by the shoulder and pulled her back, then brought his hand up against Severus' chest pushing him back suddenly. He stepped toward the wizard clenching his fist, not understanding what he was about to start.

"My gods! Richard, no! He doesn't know what he is doing, Severus. Please." She managed to pull Richard back and looked at Severus as tears coursed down her face. "You have done enough for one day, Snape. Get the bloody hell out of here. Leave him alone."

Severus turned on his heel and went into the other room where he proceeded to pull Hermione's books onto the floor, emptying the bookcase as he searched for her journal.

"Who is he, Vickie!" Richard turned to her. "Tell me now, who he is to you."

Hearing the sound of things falling and glass breaking in the outer room, she shook her head at Richard and turned to stop Severus.

"It's not here. If you are looking for the instructions they are not here." She ran to grab his arm and pull him back from her bookshelves. "Leave, just leave before I lose everything...please."

Severus looked at Richard and then smirked at Hermione. "Where is it, Miss Granger, or should we bare all?"

"Poppy, she destroyed it," she whispered. "Now leave. Please just leave before you ruin even this. Must I lose everything? Please, this is all I have left. Only a few weeks more, please."

She slumped to her knees as Richard hurried to her, squatted down and pulled her to him. He looked up at Severus in question only to see him turn and walk out the door.

"Vickie, talk to me. What did he want? What was this all about?"

She pulled away from him and ran to the loo, where she fell on her knees to vomit. He hurried after her, holding a cool, wet flannel on her neck until she was done, and then supported her at the sink, helping her to clean her mouth and brush her teeth. When she was done, he picked her up and laid her on her bed, climbing in next to her and pulling her back to his chest.

She could not think past the anger on Severus' face and the confusion and hurt on Richard's. She could not breathe and wanted to sleep and wake up to summer when this would all be past. She sobbed until she could no more and wanted to stay wrapped in the cocoon of his arms forever. She knew it was over, that she would send him away in the morning. If she kept him close he would find out, and if doing so put him in danger, she would send him away and be glad that he was safe.

"Richard," she said, turning her head up to look back at him. "Make love to me? Please, Richard I need you tonight. Please don't leave until morning."

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"Vickie?" Richard leaned over and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. "Are you ok?"

She nodded and turned her head further away from him, embarrassed and unable to look at him. She had wanted, had even asked him to take her, then she had cried as he lay over her. She had pulled him to her, desperately and quickly found her own release, only to push him away angrily, denying him his.

"I'm sorry, Richard. I don't know what is happening to me. I feel I am going mad."

He chuckled then kissed her neck. "I guessed that by what you just did. It's okay, Vickie. I need you here with me. Talk to me, don't turn away. We can still make this work."

"You won't understand."

"Try me, maybe I can surprise you. I want to marry you, Vickie. No matter what this is we can get though it."

He climbed out of bed and walked to the kitchen to make her the kind of coffee she liked and to find something for breakfast.

"Happy Christmas," he called back over his shoulder to her. "Come out here and keep me company."

"Happy Christmas," she said, not wanting to get up and face what she knew was coming.

She heard him moving around the kitchen and then quickly slid on a pair of jeans and pulled a tee over her head. She walked to the kitchen, stopping to survey the damage in the sitting area.

"Come on, we can clean that up later." Richard stood in the door looking at her. "We need to talk first. And then you are invited to drive down to Hannah's with me. You must have really hit it off with her. I think the only reason she invited me this year was to see you."

"I like her. We had a good time last summer." She looked up at him sadly.

"Good. She is sort of the family matriarch since Mum passed. You can see what kind of children this family produces." He grinned at her. "All smart, beautiful and precocious. You've only met her two. Trust me, with three sisters and two brothers all married with children it is quite a turnout. It gets noisy as hell and I love it."

Hermione followed him into the kitchen, taking her place at the table. She reached for the coffee pot and poured them each a cup as he rummaged around in the fridge until he found a container of strawberries and grabbed a bunch of bananas from the counter tossed them on the table.

"Breakfast." He nodded to the fruit and then sat, holding his beaker in both hands and resting his forearms on the table. "Talk."

She snapped her head up and locked her eyes on his. "I don't know what to say to you."

"Start with your name," he said coldly.

"Granger."

"Why did you lie to me?"

She looked down at the table and shook her head.

"Does that mean you won't tell me? It must, because it can't mean you don't know."

She was unable to raise her eyes to meet his. "Richard, I am sorry, I..."

"Sorry? Bloody hell." He raised his voice as he stood up. "What was he looking for?"

"I don't know. He was..."

"Stop. No more lies." He waited for her to talk and saw her turn her face from him. "Now, what was he looking for?"

She looked at up at him and felt her world spinning away from her. She wanted to reach for him, and tell him everything but she could not bring herself to do it. She knew his look would change if she told him what she was. She knew he would run.

"Vickie, please talk to me." He squatted down in front of her and drew the pad of his thumb over her jawline and down her throat. "Whatever it is we can get through this."

"It is not safe," she whispered to him, leaning into his touch. "Everyone I know, everyone I knew.... it's not safe."

"What are you talking about? Vickie, I need to understand."

Hermione raised her head to look at him. "Richard, I think you should leave. I don't want to love you anymore."

"What is your first name? I don't even know who I am talking to."

"I can't tell you, I won't. Leave, just leave me alone."

"This Snape, does he come here often?"

She looked back at the table. Squeezing her eyes shut, she put one hand over her mouth to hold back the sobs and shook her head.

"Is this it, Vickie? Is this how you want it to end?" he asked softly, with anger behind every word.

She heard him walk into the bedroom, and the rustle of fabric, and then she heard the front door open and close.

Running to the window, she put her hand to the glass and watched him walk away, wanting to run after him and pull him back. She sunk to her knees and cursed Snape for coming and herself for not having enough courage.

Richard walked back to campus and up to his office. He no longer wanted to see his sister or to celebrate the holiday with his family. He leaned his arms on his desk and played the last two days over in his head, trying to discern what had happened.

He unlocked the bottom drawer of his desk and pulled out the pair of antique crystal goblets he had bought her. He picked them up, one in each hand, and held them to the sunlight that came though window, seeing the dance of colour against the opposite wall. With a yell of anger, he threw them at the wall and screamed out in rage as they shattered and fell to the floor.

Then picking up the bottle of vodka he had planned to give the head of the History Department for the holiday, he found he would rather put it to his own use. Granger, he thought as he tipped the bottle to his mouth and drank the colourless liquid quickly, feeling it burn down the back of his throat. Granger. He heard it again and he closed his eyes and saw her face on the back of his eyelids. He knew of only one way a woman could easily change her last name. He brought the bottle back to his lips determined to forget her and Snape, who seemed to have easy access to her rooms.

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Severus had been furious when he helped Poppy rearrange the infirmary and came across his old file. With a smirk at the knowledge that Poppy would keep records on all the injuries that he had received and the potions she had supplied, he opened the file to flip through it. That is when he found the receipt from St. Mungo's for the potion.

He had picked up the receipt in his long, thin fingers, scowling at the name of Granger as the potion maker, and a partial list of ingredients that may interact with other potions, as required when administering a test potion not yet approved for use. He read down the list, raising an eyebrow as he saw what she had done and then froze when he saw the last item. He crumpled the parchment in his hand and shoved it in his pocket.

How dare she, he thought. He knew how long it would take to separate the blood of Nagini to find Voldemort's essence and infuse it into the potion. He knew from the other ingredients that she had thought to find Voldemort's, for Voldemort was immune to the venom of the snake, and by infusing it in him she gave him the same immunity.

He now had Voldemort's blood infused in his. He shut his eyes to concentrate and to control his rage. He heard the sound of his own heart in his ears, and felt a rush of adrenalin he had not felt since the final battle.

Grabbing his cloak, he had rushed to find her and get the complete list of ingredients and the procedures she had used to create this potion that reeked of the black arts. He needed to reverse this. He would rather live with the pain than be linked like this to the Dark Lord forever.

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Minerva heard his footfalls before she heard the pounding. She opened up the door and stepped aside, waving him to the table that the teapot sat on.

"I am sure you would like something stronger. However, in you present state that is all you get."

"Minerva I have just been to see Hermione." He walked to her liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of wine, sneered, set it down and found the whisky he wanted.

"One, Severus, you are an ugly drunk," she said hotly as she sat and smoothed her skirt.

"Fine." Severus slammed the bottle down on the table after taking a long pull. "One bottle, one drink."

"So, you found out what she did." Minerva narrowed her eyes. "I am sure you appreciate her efforts."

"I do not," he stormed at her. "How dare she, how dare she do this without my knowledge."

"What have you done to her, Severus?" Minerva looked at him as she raised her chin, looking down her nose at him. "I warn you, Severus, you leave that girl alone."

"She is alone." He smirked at her. "I am sure she is more alone now than ever before."

"I asked you a question. I expect you to answer me." Minerva looked at him evenly.

"Now, children," Albus' voice came from his portrait. "Let us have a quiet evening. It is, after all, Christmas. Happy Christmas, Severus, and to you, my dear Minerva."

Severus stood up and yanked the picture from the wall, strode to the door and pitched it into the hallway. "I have had enough of that old fool for a lifetime."

"Severus, really," she said, hurrying to the hall to retrieve the portrait. Carrying it back into her room, she clicked her tongue and glared at Severus.

Looking at the portrait, she sighed. "I am sure you will understand that I cannot invite you this Christmas, Albus. Perhaps I will have a drink with you when my guest has left."

She leaned the picture on the floor, facing the wall, and with a gentle pat to the top of the frame returned to Severus. She snatched the bottle from his hand and replaced it in her liquor cabinet.

"That is quite enough for you, young man."

"Minerva, she had no right to do this. I have contacted Poppy, who I must say rather rudely dismissed me."

"Poppy? You expect her to come back on Christmas because you are upset over something that you have benefited from?"

"It is not a benefit, it is dark magic."

"Oh, really? Let's not be melodramatic about this. It is perhaps on the grey side, but it is not dark magic."

"Grey? Grey?" Severus stood and began to pace. "It is black, dark was being kind, and you say grey?"

"Severus, I am sure that she did not realize that." Minerva calmly reached for her tea.

"Do you somehow forget how he was reconstructed? Do you remember that blood was needed? Blood infused in a potion that now runs in my veins. Do you mean to tell me she did not know exactly what she was doing?"

He ran his hands though his hair and then returned and sat heavily in the chair. "I would rather the pain, Minerva. I would rather death than risk him again."

"She destroyed all her notes, Severus. She destroyed even the cauldrons she used." Minerva leaned forward and peered into his eyes, frowning. "Poppy should not have saved anything to do with the potion. It was the condition Hermione gave us all."

"There, by your own admission she knew what she did."

"No, she knew how you would react. Further, she knew by destroying all evidence no one would ever know about the potion. As only Poppy, I and Hermione knew of the pain you were in she mad a wise choice."

"Why did she hide it from me? She knew or she would have ..."

"Severus, is this not what the Muggles do all the time?"

"No, this is different. This is not a serum, a mere vaccination or anti-biotic. Minerva, this is the dark arts I tell you."

"Oh stop it now. You would not have taken it if you knew what was in it, or that Hermione had brewed it herself. I think it is more the fact that she found a cure you could not that irks you the most."

"Nonsense," he spat at her.

"Is it?" She smiled sweetly at him. "Are you sure? If Albus were here and handed you a potion, assuring you that although it was made by infusing Tom's immunity it was safe, would you have taken it willingly?"

"Minerva, this is different."

"Why? Because a mere girl made it for you?"

"She is not a girl."

"A Muggle-born?"

"Do you forget where I grew up, old woman?"

"One of the trio?" Minerva clicked her tongue at him.

"Trio," he sneered. "Two fools and an arrogant bint."

"The truth of it is simple. You would buy a potion, but not accept it from a friend. You have no trust in anyone, Severus. You have no faith in those who would consider you a friend."

"You have sat under that portrait for too long. Now you even sound like the old man."

"Perhaps," she sighed. "You carry your guilt the same as she. You do not think you are good enough for friendship. You run from it like the plague."

Severus leaned back in his chair and looked at her coldly, feeling exposed and open under her gaze.

"Tell me, Severus," she said, then took a sip of her tea. "Why do you think she was so upset when she found who had paid her tuition?"

Severus leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees, and looked up at her, only shaking his head.

"I thought to help her." He shrugged his shoulders and looked away from her gaze. "It was nothing more."

"And you paid the tuition for Tonks' son for the same reason?"

He looked at her and nodded his head. "It is the least I could do. I trust you to keep your silence on this."

"She is afraid, Severus. She is afraid it came with strings as everything else has come to her." Minerva watched him, and then turned to set her cup down. "Now leave the girl alone. Let her see that you ask nothing of her."

"I only asked ..."

"I know that. She does not. We brought her here and expected too much or her. We allowed her to run with Mr. Potter and expected her to help him. She was allowed, at Mr. Potter and Mr. Weasley's insistence, to join the Order and thrust into a war. Everything she was given has cost her dearly. We gave her the secret of a safe house and it cost her parents their memories of her. She now thinks her education will cost her. Leave the child alone, Severus, leave her alone to find her way."