After the Fall

Disclaimer: Not Mine

After the Fall

Wands and Things

The summer had been too short and too busy to worry about tuition, books, and the fact that she needed a new laptop. Hermione had met Richard's family and spent a week with his sister in Southampton, playing tourist as they took daily trips around the countyside and met some of the family.

They had visited Stonehenge and driven up to Avebury. She had thought she would die as Hannah made a quick left off the busy road and climbed the winding, dipping road up to the parking lot at Old Sarum. She hardly ever rode in a car anymore since she had taken the train to Hogwarts that last time before her seventh year. She threw her arms over her head and squealed as the car bounced over the dirt path and up to the top of the mound, then laughed when they reached the top and she saw Hannah's face was just as white as her own.

They had walked arm in arm around the ruins and climbed on top of the ancient mounds together, chatting about things Hermione had only recently re-aquatinted herself with. She made up her mind to get a television, or at least a radio, if for no other purpose then to make conversation easier. She remembered some of the images she had seen pop up on her laptop and managed to get through many talks by redirecting them to what she knew.

It was at Vespasian's Camp that Hermione felt the magic radiate up from the ground and knew without saying a word that she alone could see the small lodging in the centre of the earthen mound. She walked next to Hannah, glancing back and watching as a slender woman stepped out of the lodge and looked directly at her. Hermione turned away quickly, afraid the witch would strike up a conversation. She pulled Hannah away from the centre of the encampment and feigned interest at the view from the top of the earthen wall.

She was relieved to see the witch blend in with the other tourists and slowly walk down the path to the dirt road on the other side of the embankment. After that she kept her head lowered and looked only at what Hannah pointed out to her, having difficulty in discerning what a Muggle could see and what they could not.

She returned by train to her apartment the next day, needing to be someplace she could not be found out. The day trip to Vespasian's Camp had bothered her more than she knew it should. She stepped on the platform and smiled to see Richard hurrying toward her. He hugged her to him and picked her up, swinging her in a circle and laughing at her squeal of laughter at being back and feeling safe.

"I've missed you," he said into her hair. "Gone only a week and I miss you like bloody hell."

She looked up at him and bit her lip. "Do you want to come over for dinner tonight?"

"Do we have to eat?" He pushed a piece of hair behind her ear and looked down at her hungrily, as she blushed and looked around, afraid someone might overhear.

"No, but you may want to pick up some eggs for breakfast."

"Come on, I'll walk halfway with you. I have to get up to my office. Term starts next week and I have to ..."

"Oh my." She stopped walking and turned to him. "I should have gone in two days ago. I forgot all about it. I have to find out if my application went through."

"I don't believe you forgot." Richard laughed, taking her arm as they began to walk again. "You are the most organized person I know. You even make lists of what lists you are working on."

"I have always done that. It helps me to think."

"Can I see my list?"

"Your list?" She turned red and looked straight ahead, knowing he was watching her from the corner of his eye.

"I am sure you have a list of pros and cons on me."

"I ... it ... maybe just a short one." She wrinkled her nose and looked at him quickly.

"Short on the pros or the cons?"

"Richard," she sighed and shook her head.

"I want to see the cons. I can work on them, or least I can explain them."

"I don't think you would understand my notes." She worried her lip, thinking of the red ink she had used as she wrote MUGGLE across the top line. She had stopped there, seeing in the letters that it was enough to fill the entire page.

They walked to the campus together, where she parted with him to hurry up to the administration building as he headed up to his office to work on the coming term's schedules. She left the office after not finding her name on the posted list and talking to the clerk. She thought of Snape standing behind the pub telling her she would not get the scholarship, and cursed him as if the saying of it had made it so.

She fought tears as she hurried back to her apartment, where she threw her purse on the floor with her jumper and stomped into the kitchen to put on a pot of water for tea. She had enough money left for rent or one of the two terms she had left in school. She knew even if she took on more hours at the library that she could not make it. She picked up a cup and threw it against the wall, then leaned her arms on the counter top and tried to stop her anger.

She thought of Richard and felt tears prickling at the back of her eyes as she imagined his look when she told him she would be leaving school. His contract was up in four months, and she should be finishing school in seven. She looked down at the ring on her right hand, took a deep breath, and stood up to measure out the tea.

She had hoped and even prayed that this day would never come. She wanted to lie to him, and hide with him until he left, and then she would let him walk away. Just four more months, she silently prayed, just four more months and she could let him go. She squeezed her eyes closed and prayed to just have those four months.

"Damn," she said aloud when she heard a knock on her door. She had hoped not to see Richard until she could formulate a plan; now she thought wildly of what to say to him. She pulled the door, stepping aside to let him in, keeping her eyes on the floor.

"That is a bad habit to get into, opening the door without knowing who is behind it." Hearing Snape's voice, she jumped and stepped back.

"What the fuck do you want?" she sneered.

"I see you have picked up the local vernacular quite well."

"I asked you a question."

"Do you want to discuss this in the hallway or shall I step in?"

"The hallway." She folded her arms and glared at him.

"Fine." He pulled his hand out of his pocket and shoved a small box at her.

She stepped back and looked at him warily. "What is it?"

"A wand." He smirked.

"Git," she said as she grabbed the box, opened it up and looked at a diamond-studded stickpin. "Sure doesn't look like a wand."

"It is charmed." He put his hand to the bridge of his nose. "Shall we still continue on in the hallway?"

She rolled her eyes and stepped aside to let him in.

"I just put a pot of tea on," she said.

"Is that an offer or more information that you wish to impart to me?"

"Neither, it is a hint for you to hurry so I can drink my tea while it is hot." She smirked at him.

"Miss Granger, I have no wish to interfere with your tea. However, I do need to explain about the pin."

"What is this?" She looked at the stickpin again.

"It is in fact a wand. A hidden one. It will not be fit to you as your real one. However, in the case of an emergency any wand will be useful. If you would be so good as to hold the pin in you hand, without saying a word, I shall explain it."

She looked at him warily and then walked to the kitchen and grabbed the teapot. Pouring out two beakers, she put them on the table and pointed to a chair.

"Five minutes." She glared at him and waited until he sat to look at the stickpin again.

"Miss Granger, please take it out of the box and hold it in your right hand. Do so silently, please."

"Fuck!" She gasped and put her hand to her mouth. She had managed to stab herself with the point of the stickpin and now stood and glared at him.

"Miss Granger," he said with a sigh, and his hand went to the bridge of his nose again. "Now, albeit it is a little late, let me explain the use of the pin."

Hermione sucked at the heel of her hand and looked at him strangely, wondering what she had done.

"The pin may be worn in open sight of Muggles. They will see it, but obviously will have no idea what it is." He picked up his cup and took a swallow. "To activate the charm, take the pin again in your right hand and say the password."

Hermione looked at the pin that lay on the table and picked it up. "What is the password?"

"The first word you say after picking it up. If you remember, Miss Granger, I did ask for your silence."

She smirked at him and then started to laugh. "So, if I say, you know, it will turn into a wand?"

"Yes, Miss Granger."

"Fuck," she said, laughing as the pin instantly became a wand. "How do I shrink it down again?"

"Repeat the word," he said, then held up his hand. "Quietly, Miss Granger, quietly."

She shrunk it down to size and then sat at the table with him as she attached the pin to her tee. "I shouldn't wear this, you know. I am trying to ... well, I am still trying to fit in here. I thank you. I think it will make me feel safer."

"Safer, Miss Granger? The purpose is to afford you medical assistance if you should need it or, in case of an accident, you may contact us to come to your assistance. It is not advisable for a witch attempting to hide to seek treatment in a Muggle emergency setting. A severe trauma may make it impossible to control your magic and endanger those around you."

"Yes, that too." She smiled weakly at him.

"Minerva will be curious as to your schooling." He scowled at her reaction to the charmed stickpin.

"Minerva will?" She smiled at him and saw how uncomfortable he became. "It appears that you were correct, Professor. I do not qualify for a scholarship based on the year I am in, and the fact that I did not complete the necessary paperwork in a timely fashion eliminates any financial help."

"Shacklebolt has made many changes in the Ministry, including the hiring practices. Many of the small shops are reopening in the Alley, and in Hogsmeade employment would now be an option."

"No, Professor." She shook her head. Then, picking up her cup in both hands and looking at him, she grinned. "I have known you for what now? Fifteen, sixteen years? This is the first time we sat down and had a cup of tea together."

"You are avoiding the discussion."

"No, Professor, I am changing the topic." She grinned over the rim of her teacup.

"Perhaps we should discuss the broken china on your floor and the crash I heard when coming up the steps?" he purred at her.

"I am sorry you must run off so soon, Professor." She stood up and grabbed the tea from his hands. "Perhaps we can do it again in sixteen years."

"Minerva will want to know what your plans are." He stood and crossed his arms over his chest as he sneered at her.

"I am sure you would," she said evenly, then turned away so he could not see her lip begin to tremble.

"Vickie? Are you home?" Richard's voice cut through from the next room.

Hermione spun around to look at Snape, who now stood with a smirk on his face and a lifted eyebrow.

"Richard! In here." She looked at Snape and glared as she pushed past him and went to meet Richard.

"I was just having tea with an old friend, he was just leaving." She took Richard's arm and turned back to Snape. "Weren't you, Professor?"

"Yes, quite true. However, I have not met your friend, Miss... Vickie." He smirked and turned to Richard. "Professor Snape, Professor Severus Snape. I met Vickie when she was a student of mine at a very exclusive school in Scotland. Perhaps she has told you of it?"

"No," Richard said, looking at Hermione strangely. "She has never mentioned it. Forgive me, sir."

He stepped forward and held out his hand. "Richard, Richard Hayes. I am a Professor of Literature at the University here, although my specialty is ancient languages. Did you say your field of study?"

Snape stepped forward and took Richard's hand with his right as his left pulled his wand and quickly lifted it to the man's forehead. "Legilimens!" he whispered.

"Bastard!" Hermione tried to push him away only to have Snape pull her against him with his right hand and hold her still as his left held the wand to Richard.

He quickly looked into Richard's mind, turning corners and opening doors. He caught a sight of Hermione walking away with only a towel wrapped around her and turned to open more doors, seeking what he hoped to find.

He ran down a staircase he saw in his mind and found Richard's childhood. He moved forward and, seeing only Muggle schools and Muggles surrounding him, he turned to run past more images to get back to the present to discern the man he was. He saw Richard standing in front of a class, and saw him as he held Hermione in his arms, and knew what he felt for her. He stepped back, releasing Hermione and incanting a simple memory charm on the man in front of him.

"It has been a pleasure, Mr. Hayes." He nodded and walked to the door.

"I will walk you down, Professor." Hermione clenched her teeth together and glared at him.

"No, please do not bother. I can find my way." He smirked at her and walked out the door, closing it behind him.

"Strange man," Richard said with his eyes still on the door.

"That, my dear, is known as an understatement of magnificent proportions." Hermione stood, staring at the closed door.

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Minerva sat with Severus in her office and reached to pour their second cup of tea.

"Did she say what she would do?" Minerva looked up while holding the pot over his cup. "Surly she is a smart witch. She would not have gone off without having thought this out."

"I spoke to her Headmaster and I made a side trip to the financial office. It seems our Miss Ganger was sure she could complete the four year course in two."

"As she should have," Minerva sniffed.

"She was put behind her estimation. The use of computers and the added expense of laptops and the mechanical items she had to purchase to go with it was something she had not foreseen." Severus took his cup and leaned back in his chair. "I am sure if Miss Granger could handwrite her reports and such she would have been fine. However, the usage of the new machines has lowered her confidence and has had a disastrous effect on her."

"What else? Is she planning on coming back?" Minerva looked down at her cup and shook her head before looking back up at Severus. "Surely she has come to terms with her past by now."

"Minerva, she is a Muggle-born and saw and did things in a war she was not ready for. She needs to accept that before she can move on." He placed his cup down on the table. "She still has not accepted that she is a witch living as a Muggle. She seems to think of herself as a Muggle first, who happens to be witch."

"Many of our students are as she is and they have handled it just fine."

"No, very few. Most have at least one parent from this world and one from the Muggle. Some, such as young Mr. Potter, although raised in the Muggle world are magical by birthright, and accept it much quicker. Miss Granger still feels torn. She never accepted this one fully and she still carries the guilt of a child over what she did to her parents."

"She adjusted well. She was in my house. I would have seen the signs." Minerva shook her head. "No, Severus, I will not accept that. She was fully adjusted to this world."

"She could say the charms and spells, and she seemed happy, Minerva, but she never said good-bye to her old life. The war came, and she took it on herself to foolishly modify her parents[Author ID1: at Wed Sep 23 07:31:00 2009 ]'s memory and send them out of the country. No, Minerva, she carries a lot of guilt and has so far not been able to come to terms with it."

"She did what she thought was right." Minerva felt the sting of tears in her own eyes. "If she had asked we would have put them in a safe house, perhaps in France. She just never asked."

"She was caught up in the excitement that only a child can find in the romantic visions of war and rushing off to help. Minerva, she is not ready to return until she can fully accept what she is, what she has done to her parents, and what happened during the war and forgives herself."

"And you, Severus? Have you forgiven yourself?"

"I am not the one we are speaking of." He stood stiffly and walked to the window. "I have come to terms with my life, if that is your question."

"My question was concerning forgiveness. Sometimes that forgiveness does not come from others. Tell me, Severus, does she have friends? Has she been able to at least make a connection in her world?"

Severus chuckled and turned back to Minerva. "You may say that. If she allows it to continue, she has found a very good friend."