Cold as Ice: Filled with Pain

Ginny's POV

I saw Draco in the hall. The very sight of him use to bring back memories. Good memories, but not anymore. All they brought now was the cold. The pain of what he had done to me had turned me to ice. I had gave him my heart and he had thrown it back in my face. He's the reason that I've turned to stone. I've turned colder than

Draco himself is now.

I'm numb.

He passed by me, giving me a stare that would have sent anyone running for safety. Not me. I looked him straight in the eyes so he could see what he had done to what I had once been. I saw him flinch, but he quickly recovered so no one would notice. I brushed past him. I felt a cold chill run up my spine. He feels it. He turns to stare at me.

Watching, wanting me to turn to face him; to show him even the littlest of emotions. I refuse to give him that satisfaction.

I wonder...

If I was the girl that was beside him now would it be different? Would I feel this void of emotion? I'll soon see what she feels after a month or so when he's had his fun. She'll probably lock herself in her room and cry. Then again..., but what does it matter. I don't care anymore than I care about how he feels.

But still, if it had been different...

I sit down at the table for lunch not feeling very hungry. I pick up one of the small sandwiches off of my plate, forcing myself to eat it. No one has noticed the change in me. No ones ever paid attention to the silly little girl full of dreams, always off in her own world all the time. I'm not that girl anymore, though I let them think that. I'd rather they think that then see what I've become.

Harry looks over at me. I look at him only to turn my gaze to my plate so he doesn't notice the cold, glazed over look that are now my eyes. I'm too late; he noticed. He turns and whispers in Hermione's ear. I feel her turn to stare at me for a moment. She whispers something back.

A smirk crosses my lips as the knife I'm holding slips through my loose grip, cutting into my skin. I watch as the blood from the cut begins to rise. It fascinates me.

I grab a napkin out of pure habit, and wrap it around the wounded area. I watch the blood as it begins to soak through it.

I suddenly feel a pair of eyes on the back of my head. I know who it is, but refuse to turn and meet his gaze. I get up from my seat, making an excuse that no one bothers to pay any attention to, keeping their attention on the different conversations that are going on. I never bother to pay attention to any of them.

I make my way out into the deserted hallway and start to head in the direction of my next class. I hear foot steps running in my direction. I don't need to turn around to know who they belong to. I quicken my pace so I don't have to talk to him. Unfortunately his legs are longer than mine and he has no trouble catching up with my pace.

'Ginny?' I hear him call questioningly.

A smirk crosses my face again as I face him. I see him flinch, but ignore it as I answer,' What? Come to try and repair the damage you've caused? Or are you going to try and cause more? Let me save you your precious time. It won't work.'

I see him blink back a tear that had tried to surface. 'Ginny I-'I cut him off.

'Careful Malfoy. You wouldn't want to start to cry. It'll ruin your reputation. People might actually start to think you have feelings.'

I've hit a nerve. A cold laugh escapes my lips as his eyes begin to water. A tear escapes his eyes. He doesn't bother to wipe it away. I lift my hand to do it for him. 'Don't cry over me Malfoy,...its a lost cause.'

I turn on my heel and head in the opposite direction. I feel his gaze upon me once again as I head down the hall toward my next class. I pause before I turn down the next hall and look back at him.

He's in the same spot the tears pouring down his face. He doesn't care that people coming out of the Great Hall are starting to stare at him in shock, as they pass him.

I start to feel sorry. Looking at him the good memories begin flooding my mind. I try pushing them out of my mind, but it doesn't work. My the ice is starting to melt. A tear starts to trail down my face as I look at the person who destroyed my world.

I want him back...