La Vie en Rose

Present Time

It was hot and stuffy in the crypt of the Sacré Coeur that night. Alone in a corner, in the middle of the burning candles that were casting a dark light around him, sat a man. Shadows were dancing all around him, but he was in no mood to look at them, much less to dance, too. In fact, he was crouching on the floor. His hands were joined but he was not praying; he did not know how. Wizards did not pray. Or maybe some did, but he had never been taught how. He was actually saying this out loud.

"I don't know how to pray... I've never learnt how to. But I'm begging You, whoever You are up there, if even You do exist, please, let us find a way. Let us find a way to heal our wounds. To be happy together. I love her, no one could deny it, and she still loves me. I could see it in her eyes, her tears were proof of her feelings for me. Please, in the name of all that is Sacred on Earth, in the name of love, probably the most Sacred feeling of all, let us find a way to be together Let us find a way... I know I hurt people... I know I hurt Eileen... but..."

The sound of steps resounding on the wooden floor... A door being opened... The very recognizable sound of a rope... A body hanging at the end of it... A scream...

Ron furiously wiped his eyes with the heel of his hands. Enough crying... Enough tears... Hadn't they both suffered enough? Couldn't Hermione see that it was time to end all this? Didn't she realize he was in love with her? Had always been, and would always be, no matter what happened? No matter what had happened? Was she so blind?

Five years before

The next day.

Ron woke up. Little by little, he remembered the events that had occured a few hours before. He smiled, his eyes closed, and reached for Hermione's body on the other side of the bed, but it was empty. He opened his eyes and turned his face. He was alone. He got up, still naked, and looked for a note. He searched all over his flat. There wasn't any.

"It's alright. She's probably gone back to her flat, or went out to buy something to eat. I have nothing to worry about, absolutely noth-"

The harshness of reality brought him back from his little cloud.

Eileen.

He was supposed to marry her that very day. How on earth was he going to tell her that he was canceling their wedding... the very day it was supposed to be taking place?

I really am a bastard. There's no other word to describe me.

He threw himself on his sofa. His eyes fell on the clock on the wall. Nine in the morning. The wedding was to take place at three in the afternoon. Everything was ready, everybody was rushing to get the last things done. The wedding was to take place at the Burrow. His mother had most certainly had everything ready two months before that day... Once again, Ronald Weasley would be seen as a loser, as someone unworthy. He exhaled loudly.

"Fucking shit! How do I get myself into all these troubles?"

"What troubles, Honey?"

Ron was startled. He hadn't hear Eileen apparate in his flat, behind the sofa he was sitting on.

She kissed him on the head and then noticed that he was naked.

"Oh my God, Ron, what are you doing naked on your sofa?" she laughed, caressing his chest. Her fingers were cold.

He watched her laugh, knowing he was going to make her cry.

"I only got up a minute ago."

"Oh, alright. Ron, I know we're not supposed to see one another before the wedding because it could be seen as a sign of bad luck or something, but I woke up this morning thinking of you and thought, what the Hell, I need to see him right now. So I took quick shower, got dressed up, and Apparated here."

"Hum, Eileen... Honey... I 'm going to get dressed, okay?"

"Okay. I have to go anyway. I've got a lot of things to do before this afternoon," she said, taking his hand in hers as he was standing up. "I'll see you this afternoon, right? I can't wait to be Mrs. Ronald Weasley, you know, sweetheart? Oh, Merlin, Ron, I love you so much!" she added, kissing him fully on the lips.

How can I do this to this sweet woman? I'm everything she has on Earth... Her parents died when she was little, she lost her grand-mother, the person that had been everything to her, one year before meeting me... Eileen, I'm so sorry, so sorry...

He felt tears fill his eyes. But he had to be strong.

"No, Eileen, wait. I need to talk to you."

"Can't this wait till this afternoon?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Oh. Alright," she said, a bit frightened, "Go get dressed. I'll wait for you here."

"It will only take a minute."

"Okay."

Ron went to his room, got dressed, and taking a comb, went to his mirror.

"You bastard," he said to his own reflection.

He walked back to his living-room. Eileen was sitting on the sofa. He cleared his throat and went to sit next to her. He could see in her eyes that she knew she was not going to like what he was about to say. He couldn't look at her in the eye. He kept silent until she said, gently, but firmly, "Ron, what is the matter?"

"Eileen, I... I... Something... happened... last night."

"What do you mean by 'something happened last night'?"

"I got a late visit..."

"After your stag party?"

"Yes."

"And... Who was it?"

Ron licked his very dry lips.

"Hermione."

"Oh... And?"

"Eileen, I'm not going to lie to you. We made love."

Eileen was silent for a moment, biting her lips, holding back her tears. He did know her heart and very fragile universe were shattering deep inside. But he had too much affection for her to lie to her or to marry her knowing he wasn't in love with her... Knowing that Hermione shared his feelings.

"Okay," she eventually stammered. "I knew this was bound to happen one day. I know you two have a great affection for one another. I was actually surprised when I met her that you had never been out together, the way you are always fighting and bickering about anything. I think that really was the best example of Unresolved Sexual Tension. I'm glad you two did it before we got married. Now, you're both free to... you're free. Free to meet other people, live your own life, and... "

"No, no, Eileen, you don't understand. I love Hermione."

"Of course you love her. Like you love Harry or your brothers... "

"No, no. I'm in love with her. "

She closed her eyes. She choked back a sob, but tears fell down her cheek. Ron was not looking at her. He could not.

"Eileen..." he whispered. "I'm canceling the wedding."

The final stab...

She burst in tears. "Ron, how can you do this to me today," she cried. "How can you?"

"I'm sorry, I really am. I just can't... lie to you."

"You suddenly realize you cannot lie to me anymore?"

"What do you mean 'anymore'?"

"Do you think I am that blind, Ron? I always knew you had feelings for her. But when you asked me to marry you, I thought that, maybe, you were in love with me too... How naïve of me... And you tell me you're sorry? Bullshit. You're not sorry at all. You're just glad Hermione jumped your bones last night! Now you're gonna have this little charming life with her I'm sure you've been dreaming about for ever! I hate you! I hate her! But I especially hate you, Ron. Remember this day, because it will haunt you forever!"

She slapped his face hard, tears rolling hopelessly rolling down her cheeks. She took her wand and disapparated.

Present Time

Ron wondered whether she knew when she left his flat that fateful day of 2000 she was going to commit suicide a few hours later that day.

Five years before

The same day - 11 a.m.

Ron apparated to the Burrow. It had been decorated with balloons and flowers. It would have been a very private wedding: the Weasley family, Harry, Hermione ans some other fellow Gryffindors were the only guests. Harry saw him arrive. He was already dressed in his best man's outfit.

Ron searched the garden, hoping to see Hermione. She wasn't there. Maybe she was in the house. He walked to the house, but Harry caught him by the arm.

"Hey, Ron? So nervous about today you don't even hear me call you?"

He laughed but Ron remained serious.

"Is Hermione here?" Ron asked, as they were entering the house, knowing somehow that Harry will smell alcohol on his breath.

"Hermione? No, I haven't seen her yet... She'll probably come later."

Ron opened a bottle of champagne and drank directly from the bottle.

"Ron... What's wrong?"

"I went to her flat. She wasn't there. Didn't even leave a note. I went to all the places I could think of and I didn't find her. Like she evaporated in the air."

Ron's voice was thick.

"What are you... Hey, stop drinking, Ron."

"Don't worry, Harry. It's not the first drink I've had today and I intend on drinking countless more if she does not show up."

"C'mon Ron, of course she'll show up today, it's her wedding day."

Ron laughed bitterly, mocking himself.

"Harry, no one's getting married today."

Harry took a step back.

"What the fuck are you on about?"

Ron walked to the door, opened it and called for everyone's attention. He vaguely noticed Ginny, Bill, Charlie and Percy were chatting happily together, whereas Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were sitting on a bench, looking happy. Mr. Weasley had his arm around Molly's shoulders and she had her head on his shoulder. Smoke was coming from behind the bush; whatever the twins were doing, their surprise wouldn't have equalled the one Ron was about to cause.

"Oi, oi! Listen to me, listen to me! I'm sorry, everybody... But... No one's getting married today. No one."

He looked at his feet, not wanting to see the shock on people's faces.

"Ron," said Mrs. Weasley, walking towards him, "You don't know what you're saying! You're drunk!"

"Oh, yes. Yes, Mum, I sure am!"

For she seems to have disappeared and it's so unlike her, not to face reality.

"Ronald," said Arthur reproachingly, "It's your mother you're talking to! And behave yourself! Have you forgotten today's your wedding day?"

"I told you before, Dad. No one's getting married. I cancelled my wedding with Eileen. She won't show up today. We broke up two hours ago."

"What?" Ginny asked. "But, Ron, what happened?"

"It's none of your business, little sis. I can only tell you that... I sort of realized I wasn't in love with Eileen."

Present Time

Truthfully, hadn't he always known, somewhere in the back of his mind that he wasn't in love with Eileen? He remembered saying to Hermione, today, in the cemetery, that he had killed Eileen. He knew he hadn't really killed her with his own hands, that he hadn't tied the rope around her neck. But he was blaming himself nonetheless, for he knew his words had brought about Eileen's death. Eileen's suicide.

Thinking about it still brought tears to his eyes. It always would. For he would always see in his mind the picture of Eileen's body hanging from a rope in the back of the bookshop she owned in Diagon Alley...

Five Years Before

The same day - 9 p.m.

Ron opened the door to the shop Eileen owned in Diagon Alley. She had bought it with the money her grandmother had left her when she died. It was dark and silent in the shop. It smelled of books, of leather and of polish for the wooden floor. Eileen's bookshop was much smaller than Flourish and Blotts, but Ron liked it better.

His parents had been very sad to learn that the wedding was cancelled and did not really understand why Ron had broken up with Eileen. They had told him they were disappointed, and found it cruel to have cancelled the wedding the day it was supposed to take place. Though he did not understand everything, Harry had stood by Ron. He had not told Harry and his relatives about what had happened between him and Hermione and had left the Burrow after taking a sobering potion.

He had spent the day looking for Hermione but had not found her. He had came back home early in the evening and had thought about the day. He was now certain that Hermione was avoiding him. And he was concerned about Eileen. After hours of prevarication, he had decided to go and see her at her flat. She was living above the bookshop.

Ron took a few steps inside the shop. Books were scattered all around on the floor along with a vase shattered in a thousand pieces. It was way too silent. He did not like it.

"Eileen?" he called.

Silence greeted him.

He walked to the door at the back of the shop. His steps resounded in the empty shop. The door was slightly open. He pushed it open. The first thing he noticed was the sound of a rope stretched tightly, swinging slowly back and forth. He turned his head to the left and what he saw made his heart stop beating. Eileen's body was hanging from a rope tied around her neck. Her eyes were open and her face was blue. Ron screamed.

"Eileen!"

He ran to her body, taking his wand and shouted, "Wingardium Leviosa!"

Eileen's body floated in the air, not hanging from the rope anymore, for it was level with her waist. Ron jumped on a chair and untied the knot of the rope. He took her in his arms and rested her body on an armchair nearby. He searched for her pulse but there wasn't any. He ran out to the street and cried for help.

A quarter of an hour later, a healer told him his ex-fiancée was dead. She had hung herself. They gave Ron a letter with his name on it.

Ron remembered opening it. He let his tears run down his cheek. He hadn't foreseen Eileen's death. He should have known. He should have known she would feel abandoned, he should have known she had no one but him.

But Eileen had been dead for five years... And as painful as the memory of her death was, it was now time to move on... Time to move on. He did not want to let Hermione go again. He had to see her again. And he knew where to start looking or her...

As the same time, he felt his heart tear with pain without really knowing why... Something had happened to Hermione... He felt it. He had to find her. Soon.

Le Café de la Galette

8.30 p.m.

Sophie put her coat on, took her coat and exited le café de la Galette. It was a bit cold outside and she shivered. She put the key in the keyhole and locked the café. She heard footsteps behind her and turned round. If it was a tramp, she knew what to do. She was used to deal with midnight wanderers. Well, it wasn't exactly midnight, but the sun had set long time ago.

It was not a wanderer. It was the sad man that had entered the café in the morning. He still looked desperately sad, but she could also see determination in his gaze.

She took out the key of the keyhole and put it in the back pocket of her jeans.

The man looked at her. He seemed to recognize her.

He licked his lips and asked very slowly, "Do you speak English?"

She looked at him for a moment, before answering, hesitating, "Yes. A bit."

She had a strong French accent but Ron could completely understand her.

"My name is Ron."

"My name is Sophie."

"I... was here this morning."

She nodded her head.

"Yes. I seed you."

"I want to ask you something, Sophie. May I?"

"What?"

"Can I ask something?"

"Okay."

"I am a friend of Hermione's. I need to know where she is. Do you understand?"

Sophie looked puzzled.

"What's Hermione?"

"You mean who's Hermione?" asked Ron. "Hermione is a person."

"Oh. I don't know any Hermione then."

Ron was taken aback. Then Sophie thought about the fact that the man was English. Lily definitely was English, too. Could this Hermione and Lily be the same person?

"But... she works with you... Wait a minute... " He tried to remember how the woman at the bar had called Hermione... Lily.... She had called her Lily... Like... Like... Harry's mother...

"You talking about... Lily?"

Ron's face lit up.

"Yes! Yes! Lily..."

"Then why you call her Hermione?"

"Because.... that's her real name."

"She's not Emily Smith?"

They began to walk down the street.

"She said she was Emily Smith?"

"Yes."

"She is not. But I cannot explain it to you now."

"Elle m'a menti sur son identité... Oh Lily, pourquoi?"

"What?"

"Oh, sorry. I am sad she .... I don't know..."

"How to say it in English?"

"Yes."

Ron stopped.

"Listen, Sophie. I love Hermione... Lily... I love her. I need to know where she is..."

"What if... I am not sure I can believe you..."

"Sophie... Are you in love?"

Sophie was startled... Was she in love? Aymeric... If she did not love him, then her name was not Sophie Delannel. But Aymeric was not in love with her... No, he loved Lily... Hermione... whoever she was.

"Yes. I am in love. With someone who loves Lily."

Ron's jaw clenched.

"Who is that?"

"A peintre... Er... Painter?"

"Yes."

"His name's Aymeric. He was in the café this morning."

"Does... Does..."

"Lily love him?"

Ron nodded. Sophie shook her head.

"No. I don't believe she loves him. She is always sad and she cries a lot. She tells me it is about her past this morning."

Ron swallowed hard.

"Are you from her past?"

Ron nodded.

"I hurt her. She hurt me. But I need to see her. Sophie, please help me. Help me and help Lily. She is your friend, isn't she?"

"She is my friend."

"Then help us... Please... Sophie, please... Give me her address."

Sophie thought for a moment. She wanted to help Lily. Could this man really help Lily? He looked honest and very much in love with her... Yes, he seemed to be head over heels for her. She bit her lower lip and said, "Okay. She lives Rue Saint Vincent, in Montmartre... "