Armilla

Chapter 63

I awoke on Easter Sunday in high spirits. After speaking with Snape two nights before about my upcoming visit to Father's house, I had become determined to keep the thought of it at the back of my mind so I could enjoy the Easter weekend with my brother. My mind reasoned (in a very Dumbledore-ish way) that if I worried about the future, I might miss out on enjoying the present.

I had spent the day before brewing potions all day with my brother. Umbridge had let him have the weekend away on the condition that he would still have the hospital wing potion cabinet replenished by Tuesday, as promised. I didn't mind in the least, and Snape kept me at it all day, claiming that it was "good practice" for my OWLs.

Pushing my bedcovers back, I crawled along to the foot of my bed and peered over onto the floor. There were four coloured boxes of various sizes arranged neatly. Smiling, I gathered them up and got back into bed to open them.

I opened Snape's box first. I laughed as I pulled out a small chocolate cauldron. It was filled with a whole range of chocolates which (according to the instructions on the packaging) could only be accessed by pulling a small lever at the side and catching whatever chocolate flew out.

Matilda had sent a cylindrical pink box filled with strawberry cream chocolates. The box changed shape according to how many chocolates were in there. Lisa had sent a small chocolate bunny holding a bag that would keep refilling itself with tiny chocolate carrots until it reached the product's total amount of twenty-five chocolates.

Snape walked into the room just as I was reaching for the box from Terry. He was carrying two large chocolate eggs, and wore a sceptical expression on his face.

"What's wrong?" I asked, staring at the eggs in his hands. One of them I recognised as the dark chocolate egg I had ordered for him. It would keep resealing itself to a perfect egg up to twenty times. The other egg he was holding looked very similar in size, except that instead of having gold wrapping, it had a transparent wrapping and was wrapped with a dark green bow.

"This," he said simply, holding up the egg with the bow. A slight rattling came from within it as he did so. "It's dark chocolate," he went on, as he sat down on the bed.

"I thought you liked dark chocolate."

"I do." He gave me a significant look. "This is from Dumbledore though."

"Oh." Now I could see why he seemed bewildered by it. Dumbledore only ever gave him milk chocolate stars. I laughed suddenly. "Well don't lose hope. That rattling sound is promising."

He scowled down at the egg, which was a very amusing sight. He took the packaging off and made a small crack in the top of the egg with his wand. Pulling off a piece, he turned the egg upside down and allowed its contents to fall into his hand. Sure enough, about a dozen tiny milk chocolate stars came tumbling out along with a small piece of parchment.

Shaking his head, Snape tipped all the stars back inside the egg, and then unfolded the bit of parchment.

"I never disappoint," he read. "Albus. PS. I know you like them."

I laughed.

Snape sneered as he folded the parchment and put it back into the egg. "He is sadly mistaken." He looked over at the chocolates sitting on my bed. "You've done well. Thankyou for the chocolate by the way; I prefer chocolate without hidden surprises."

I nodded. "Thanks for the cauldron. I didn't know you could get things like that."

He gave me a tiny smile. "Ah well, Potions journals sometimes advertise more than potions."

He watched as I opened the box from Terry. I pulled out a plain chocolate egg that seemed to vibrate in my hands. Before long, it was shaking violently and I put it down in front of me. Snape also leaned in to watch it, a frown on his face.

A large crack appeared, which was followed by a few more, and a couple of seconds later, a tiny chocolate chick hatched.

"That's disgusting," I muttered, having second thoughts about eating an egg that seemed to grow chocolate chicks.

We continued to watch the chick, which was now walking around on top of the box the egg had come in. It started to grow, and within thirty seconds it had matured into a hen about the size of my hand. It hopped off the box and walked around in a circle a couple of times before settling in my lap. Giving a great shudder, it suddenly moved away again, leaving behind a fresh chocolate egg.

"It just laid an egg on me," I stated in disbelief.

"That's disgusting," Snape said, looking revolted.

A couple of minutes later there were plenty of chocolate hens walking around the room, for each egg laid hatched in no time. In the end, Snape vanished the lot of them, and I was every bit as thankful as he was. I didn't fancy eating moving hens or hatching eggs, even if they were chocolate.

"Mr Boot is responsible for this, I presume?" Snape asked, frowning as he pocketed his wand.

I nodded.

He nodded curtly. "Remind me to give him detention when we get back to Hogwarts."

"Happy Easter!" came a shrill voice. I looked up to see Docky bounce into the room. Snape didn't turn around at all. He merely grimaced at the sound of his house elf.

Docky skidded to a halt next to the bed and gave a low bow. "Docky wishes Master Severus and Miss Armilla a very joyous Easter and wishes them great health and prosperity at this festive time in which-"

"Docky," Snape said quietly, through gritted teeth. He had closed his eyes in annoyance and was pinching the bridge of his nose. "When one wishes another a Happy Easter, they don't need to elaborate."

Docky straightened up, still beaming. "Yes Master Severus, sir." He turned to face me, his eyes shining. "Docky took the liberty of making an Easter egg hunt for you, Miss Armilla."

Snape opened his eyes. "What?"

Docky gave him a broad grin. "An Easter egg hunt, Master Severus."

Snape glared at him. "If that is what you're doing with your time, Docky, then I need to add more to your 'To Do' list."

Docky's ears drooped slightly. "Docky was only making Miss Armilla's day more exciting, Master Severus, sir."

Before Snape could retort, I turned the conversation away from Docky's list of chores.

"Where did you hide the eggs?" The truth was, Easter eggs hunts had never really excited me. That must have been extra proof that I really was Snape's sister.

Docky beamed. "In this room, Miss Armilla."

I frowned. "You snuck in here early this morning?"

He nodded his head vigorously. "Docky was extra quiet so he wouldn't wake Miss Armilla."

"Oh." I smiled down at him, not entirely comfortable with the thought that Docky had been wandering around my bedroom whilst I had been sleeping. "Well, thanks Docky, I'll let you know if I find them all."

Docky looked thrilled as he bowed again.

"Be off with you then," said Snape, sneering down at him.

Docky immediately scampered off, but skidded to a halt in the doorway when Snape called after him.

"Yes, Master Severus?"

Snape paused, his face inscrutable. "Are you feeling better this morning?"

Docky smiled shyly. "Much better, Master Severus. Thankyou for asking." With that, he turned and scurried out of the room.

Snape shook his head. "He'll live forever, that elf."

I ignored him and took out my wand.

"What are you doing?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Going on an Easter egg hunt," I said simply, raising my wand. "Accio hidden Easter eggs!"

A dozen eggs immediately emerged from all nooks and crannies and came soaring over to where I sat in bed. Snape had to duck as a couple nearly hit him in the head.

I looked down at the enormous pile of chocolate in my lap. "I think I found them all."

My brother merely rolled his eyes. "Cheat."

o o o o o o o o o o o o

Though it was a quiet day, my first Easter with my brother turned out to one of the happiest times I had had with him. It wasn't that we did anything terribly exciting, but it was just a quiet, relaxing day that suited both of us.

After eating breakfast, we spent much of the morning in the greenhouse, which in my opinion, ran circles around all of Professor Sprout's greenhouses. I helped my brother in pruning a range of rare plants that had strict pruning timetables. At my questioning look, Snape had told me that he had taken the steps many years before to train Docky to look after the greenhouse. Apparently he would not allow anyone else on the Merrigan grounds when he was not there.

After an excellent Easter feast, which even Snape admitted that Docky had prepared very well, we spent an afternoon duelling. Now that I had gotten the hang of my shield charm, I was enjoying duelling more and more. I managed to get through the afternoon with hexes of respectable strength and I only fell down once. It was my aim that before the holidays started, I would be so confident using my shield whilst duelling that it would become second nature.

Though months ago I had laughed at the thought of it, in the evening when Snape and I sat down in the parlour, he taught me how to play Wizard's Chess. Admittedly, I wasn't very good at it, but as Snape always enjoyed a triumph, no matter how small, he didn't seemed bored in my first attempts to get the game right. The only time he sneered was when I was outraged at how brutally my queen was obliterated.

I went upstairs at nine o'clock to shower and get ready for bed, while Snape went down to the kitchen to explain to Docky that if he was cooking with red wine, he was not to drink the rest of the bottle. (Snape had become suspicious when we heard Docky singing the latest Weird Sisters hit at the top of his voice in the kitchen).

At twenty past nine, I sat down at the piano, contemplating whether or not I should play it. The same old music book I had used the last time was still there. I had remembered closing it, but it was open again on the page of Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring. I supposed Docky had opened it again when he was cleaning. I knew Snape wouldn't have done it.

I had managed to play on Christmas Day, even though it had been difficult to start. But Shar was further than ever from my now than he had been since Merle's death. I couldn't place the nerves I felt from sitting at the piano again though. Perhaps it was because this had been my mother's piano, or maybe it was because I had seen Snape's memory of Father yelling at Mother in front of that very piano.

I could almost imagine my brother as a small child, begging his mother to play music to him. Maybe my nerves were more to do with the negative feeling that pianos had instilled in my brother and I. I had come to associate Merle's piano with Shar's unwanted company, and I assumed Snape associated his mother's piano with their suffering years ago.

I knew it was ridiculous to dwell on things like that. As I put my finger on middle C and heard the sound, I suddenly had a vision of Snape's face from earlier that evening, when I had destroyed one of his bishops. Even though it was his loss, his face had momentarily shown a hint of triumph, and it was nothing to do with me opening up something on the board that would give him a good move. Though he hadn't said anything, I had the impression that he was pleased that I had succeeded in taking his bishop. As I pressed the key again, I smiled. As corny as it sounded, I supposed that playing the piano would weaken the negative memories associated with it.

I turned the pages of the book, finally stopping on Eternal Father, Strong to Save, which had been a favourite old hymn of Merle's. It had been the last hymn played at her funeral.

I played it softly to myself, over and over again. Even Morag was quiet for once, listening intently from her place atop the armoire. On my third round, I could almost hear Merle's voice singing the lyrics in my head.

From rock and tempest, fire and foe,

Protect them wheresoe'er they go

On my fifth round, I could almost swear Merle was in the room with me; her voice was so clear in my head.

Finally, I stopped, as I thought playing it once more would be dangerous; I was close to getting teary-eyed at the sound of Merle's voice in my head. Closing the lid, I waved my wand to put out the lights and got into bed.

Snape came in shortly after to say goodnight.

"You might just be a perfectionist," he said quietly, as he sat down on my bed, "but you played it perfectly the first time round."

I smiled in the darkness. "I thought you were in the kitchen."

"I was. But I've been in my bedroom next door for the last ten minutes."

"Oh."

"Now," he said, taking on his professor tone. "I know that Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring is your favourite, since you told me that last Christmas."

I nodded.

"On your fifth rendition of this song," he went on, "I came to the conclusion that it was Merle's favourite song."

"How did you know that?" I asked, startled. God, the man was good.

"Like I said, I thought you played it perfectly the first time. I was proven wrong with each round after that. You were getting emotional and your playing improved as a result."

Now I was embarrassed. "Oh..."

Snape didn't seem bothered at all. "Mother was just the same," he went on, still very much in professor mode. "I think that was one of the main reasons Father banned her from playing."

I shifted awkwardly. "I don't normally play the same song over and over again," I said quietly, terribly embarrassed.

He was quiet for a moment. "Well, I'm glad that you did this time," he said softly.

"But...doesn't it seem like I'm being weak by doing it?" I asked, a little nonplussed.

He was silent again, deep in thought.

"Well," he said finally, "there's only Docky, Morag and I here. You're free to play the song as many times as you need to."

I shook my head. "Nah, I won't play it over and over again anymore."

"Why not?"

"It would probably seem like I'm hooked on the past then, and I really don't want to give you that impression." I was suddenly concerned that playing Merle's favourite song over and over would make Snape feel bad.

Snape shook his head. "Don't be ridiculous, Armilla."

"I'm not," I said quietly. "But if I kept playing Merle's song, wouldn't it seem like I was wishing I was in the past?"

"No," he said at once, sounding firm. "You're not wishing you're in the past. You played that song because you knew it was her favourite and more importantly, it gave you comfort because you miss her. Obviously that song has a strong connection to Merle and hearing it repeatedly made you feel close to her again."

I nodded. "That makes more sense."

He snorted. "Of course it does."

I said nothing. I always felt better when Snape put things in a different light. Sometimes I thought he knew me better than I knew myself. That was an eerie thought.

"Are you still so set against visiting the cemetery?" Snape asked quietly, a few moments later.

"Yes," I said, trying not to sound too stubborn. "I really don't want to go."

"I think you should."

"No."

"I really think you should."

"No."

"Why not?"

"I don't want to."

"That answer is far from satisfactory," he said, his tone becoming hard.

"I know, but I still don't want to."

"Armilla-"

"Please?" I said, feeling a little desperate. "I really don't want to go."

"Fine," he said coolly. "We will come to an agreement on this, I assure you. Tomorrow you can either come to the cemetery with me for a short amount of time, or you can play that song no less than twenty-five times in one sitting."

I sighed, knowing I had lost. I had nearly become teary after playing it five times. I would be a mess after twenty-five times.

"You win," I grumbled.

"Don't be silly, you know you should be going."

I said nothing.

"You know that, don't you?"

"Yes," I sighed. "That doesn't mean I'm happy about it."

I could have sworn I could see a smirk on his face through the darkness. "I can live with that."

I grumbled in reply.

He leaned over and kissed me goodnight. "Go to sleep. We have a busy day tomorrow."

o o o o o o o o o o o o

We set off for the cemetery straight after breakfast the next morning. I still didn't want to go, but that didn't seem to bother my brother.

"I promise you we won't be long," he said, after we had apparated in the cemetery.

I nodded, my eyes on the gravel path as I led the way to the grave.

About thirty feet away from the grave I came to a sudden halt, and Snape nearly ran into me.

"Armilla, what-"

"There's someone there," I whispered, gesturing to the figure of a woman standing in front of Merle's grave. It was very clearly a witch, but I couldn't tell if I knew whoever it was. She was wearing a long tartan travelling cloak and a dark green pointed hat. A wisp of white hair escaping from under the hat gave me a clue as to who it was.

"I think it's Matilda," I murmured. Matilda had been Merle's best friend, and towards the end, Merle's carer as well, and I had known Matilda all my life. She had been sitting with me when Merle died. It bothered me a little that I had trouble recognising her from the back. Perhaps it was because she had lost a little weight.

Snape hand grasped my wrist. "You have to be sure that it is Matilda," he whispered in my ear. "Not...someone else."

I nodded, just as the figure turned around and saw the two of us moving slowly towards her. She was squinting in our direction, but as we drew closer her anxious face broke into a broad smile.

"Armilla!"

When we reached her, she threw her arms around me and kissed me. There were tears in her eyes, but I assumed that they were from visiting Merle's grave.

"My darling little one, you haven't grown at all!" she exclaimed, stepping back to look at me.

"I need to be sure it is you," I said quietly, hoping I wouldn't offend her.

She didn't even blink. "Of course, dear. One has to be careful in times like these. Ask me a question."

I thought for a moment. "How many times did Merle meet Cornelius Fudge?"

Matilda smiled. "She never met any of the Ministers for Magic! In fact, that day when you and I were sitting with her in her bedroom last September, she said spending a minute with Cornelius Fudge would be a robbery of her precious time."

I turned to Snape. "That's her."

Matilda held out her hand to Snape. "Professor Snape, I'm Matilda Loxley."

He nodded as he shook her hand.

Matilda looked smug as she turned back to me. "Well then, how can I be sure that I'm really talking to Armilla Kemp?"

"Snape," I corrected quietly, as Snape shifted slightly behind me.

She flushed. "Oh yes, my apologies. Slip of the tongue. Well, Armilla, how much did Rohan pay you to walk down the aisle when you were flower girl at his wedding?"

"A galleon," I answered.

"What's this?" said my brother's voice. "You had to be bribed to walk down the aisle?"

"Oh, she was a business woman from an early age, Professor," said Matilda, giving me a sly smile. "Though she was an aloof child at times, she knew how to make money at age four."

Snape gave me a knowing look. "Ah, so the Slytherin tendencies came out even earlier than I thought," he said softly.

"No," I muttered. "I just didn't want to walk down the aisle."

"Indeed." He turned back to Matilda. "I thank you for maintaining contact with Armilla after Merle's death. I'm sure Armilla appreciates it, and you also have my sincere gratitude."

Matilda looked surprised. "Thankyou, Professor. It was always my intention to keep in contact with Armilla. I have been delighted these past months by Armilla's letters to me. They are dramatically different from the ones I received in the month or two after Merle's death. I can tell that Armilla is happy with you."

I was cringing slightly. It felt a bit like I wasn't there. I hoped Snape wasn't wondering about my earlier letters to Matilda. I had continued writing to Matilda after Merle's death, and the earlier letters were much more forced and short, as that was the time when I was struggling to develop a relationship with my brother, not to mention having bursts of depression.

Snape didn't enquire however. He merely listened (quite patiently for him), with occasional input, as Matilda asked all her questions.

"And Terry and Lisa? Are they well?"

"Yes, they're fine."

Matilda chuckled. "Have they become a couple yet?"

I nodded. "Last year." I must have forgotten to tell her that in my letters.

She smiled. "And you?"

I blushed. "...No."

"Armilla's studies come first at the moment," Snape said smoothly, his tone and choice of words immediately indicating to Matilda that school romances were forbidden territory.

"Nothing wrong with that," she said airily. "Now, tell me about your studies. Are you near the top?"

"Yeah...in some of them..."

"In most of them," Snape corrected. "Astronomy and History of Magic are the only real challenges she faces."

Matilda beamed. "So modest, Armilla." Her face became serious. "And are you planning on staying with your father over the summer?"

I hadn't given much detail in my letters about my relationship with Father. I knew though, that Dumbledore often communicated with her, and I knew that she had an idea of what Aurelius Snape was like.

"Yes," I said quietly.

"We haven't arranged the details yet," Snape explained. "When summer comes closer we will work out exactly what is happening."

Matilda turned back to me. "Even so, I would love to see you over the holidays." She looked at Snape. "Would that be possible?"

Snape was far from being a social being, but he nodded all the same. "We could arrange something," he said quietly. "Just for a few hours at a time."

"Of course," she said, looking delighted. "I have a few more of Merle's old things to give you. Photos and things she left at my house over the years."

After several more minutes of asking about school and how my Easter was, Matilda left, but not before promising that she would see me sometime during the summer.

"Speaking of Merle's old things," Snape said quietly, after Matilda had disapparated, "I need to go to London today for a few things. When we stop at Gringotts, I think we should also go to Merle's vault so you can collect whatever you would like to bring home."

I nodded. "Alright." I looked back down at the grave. I was in a better mood because I had seen Matilda again. I had not seen her since the funeral.

We stood in silence for a few moments, each of us lost in thought. For some reason, I was thinking about the time Matilda had taught me to fly. I had ended up in a tree, and had refused to come down.

"You know," said Snape quietly, glancing over at me. "It might be beneficial if I get to know Matilda. I'll find out all sorts of things about you."

I glared at him, though he had a small smile on his face. "I tell you plenty."

"You didn't tell me that you were so Slytherin as a child."

"I wasn't. Matilda was exaggerating."

He sneered. "I got the feeling that Matilda is the sort of witch who would tell me anything I wanted to know."

"She is," I replied. "But you can't take advantage of that."

He raised an eyebrow, looking slightly amused. "Why not?"

"Because I don't ask Mother to tell me everything about you. I ask you."

He nodded. "Fair point, I suppose." He narrowed his eyes. "So how many times were you bribed to do things?"

"Just that one time at the wedding. It was worth it too."

He shook his head, staring at the grave.

I looked at it too, contemplating whether or not I should tell him about hearing Merle's voice the night before.

"I...heard Merle's voice last night," I murmured.

Snape looked sharply at me. "Armilla-"

"Oh, I know it wasn't real," I said hastily, and his face softened slightly. "I just heard it in my head when I was playing. That's why I kept playing...because I could hear her voice."

Snape looked troubled. "As long as you are aware that it's a part of your imagination...she can't come back, Armilla."

"I know...I'm just telling you what I heard...or what I thought I heard," I said quietly, not looking at him.

"I am pleased that you told me," he said at once, still looking concerned. "Are you sure that it isn't bothering you?"

Slowly, I nodded. "It was just unexpected, that's all, even if I did imagine it."

"You did imagine it," he said firmly.

Again, I nodded. "I know," I whispered.

"Come," he said, taking my hands in his to disapparate. He held them a lot tighter than he normally did. "Let's go to London."

A few very unpleasant moments later, we apparated near the wizarding bank. Side-Along Apparition was still not one of my favourite things to do.

We walked along the street and into Gringotts Bank, and several minutes later we were riding along in a cart directed by a very gruff goblin.

We visited the vault 106 first, which Snape had inherited along with the Merrigan Estate. My first glance inside the vault showed me that it was no wonder my mother had been such a desirable wife for many young bachelors. I could imagine how hungry for more money my father must have been.

"I imagine the contents of Father's vault are very similar to this," said Snape, as I followed him into the vault.

"You've never seen inside it?" I asked.

"No," he said curtly. He gestured to a few jewelled boxes on the left hand side. "You may look through those if you wish. I believe there are things there that would be of more interest to you than to me."

As he went about collecting some money, I went over to the boxes and examined them. There were quite a few of them. I guessed that they were all full of jewellery.

I was right. The first box contained old brooches, some decorated with pearls, others with rubies or sapphires. Another box contained a gold necklace with a ruby pendant. The third, an oval shaped white satin-covered box, was empty.

"This one's empty," I said, holding up the box. Snape glanced up briefly to see it.

"The pearl you are currently wearing came from that box," he said shortly, returning to what he was doing.

I stared back down at the box. That was odd. Snape had given, no loaned me the necklace in the Secret Wing before he knew we were related. I was supposed to use the pearl to let him know if I needed him. It seemed strange that I had been wearing something belonging to our mother before I knew about her.

Snape came over as I picked up a small silver box that seemed to be sealed all over. Engraved upon the top, it read My Greatest Treasures. There was a small oval indent below the writing, but otherwise it was quite plain.

"I've never been able to open that one," he said, taking it from me and examining it. "I have no idea what is in it."

"The indent must mean something," I said, moving close to examine it too. "It might need some sort of key to open it."

We both suddenly looked up at each other. I knew straightaway that he was thinking along the same line as me.

I held up my left hand and took hold of the small oval shaped locket on my bracelet. As awkward as it was, I let my wrist hover over the box, while I pressed the locket into the indent, the emerald facing up.

It was a perfect fit. The emerald glowed once and the box opened. I pulled the locket out and watched as Snape pulled the lid back.

"Greatest Treasures," I laughed, as I peered into the box. Inside, I saw a diamond ring, sitting on top of a few black and white photos. The photo I could see was of a young woman and a baby. It was very clear that it was my mother and brother. "I hadn't seen photos anywhere," I said, peering into the box, which Snape still held.

"What are you talking about?" he demanded, looking at me as if I wasn't all there. "There's nothing in here. All I can see is black velvet lining."

A chill went through me. I must have been going mad. First hearing Merle's voice in my head, and now this.

"I'm not imagining it," I said helplessly.

Snape seemed to decide to give me the benefit of the doubt, for a second later he placed one hand inside the box and felt around.

"I can't feel anything," he said, not looking at me.

"I'm not mad," I said indignantly. I was not imagining it. My mind wouldn't simply invent a diamond ring and one of Snape's baby photos.

Snape held the box out to me. "Well, then, pick up whatever it is you see." He was watching me closely, his expression calculating.

My reasoning skills suddenly came back to me. "Maybe only I can see what's inside because I'm wearing the bracelet," I suggested.

He nodded, still holding out the box. "That is my belief. Of course you're not mad."

I reached in, took hold of the diamond ring and pulled it out. Snape's face didn't change in the slightest as I pulled it out, yet I knew that he could now see the ring. I put it in his hand and he held it up to examine it.

"Is that Mother's engagement ring?" I asked.

He shook his head. "No, Mother's ring had two emeralds as well as a diamond. This must have been our grandmother's ring."

He gave the ring back to me and I put it back in the box. I pulled out the photos.

Snape grimaced when he saw the first one in my hand. Mother was standing on the Snape Manor grounds, holding my brother. She was smiling, her eyes moving from the camera down to her son. The baby Snape didn't seem foul-tempered, but he wasn't smiling either. He seemed more interested in the things around him. I turned the photo over.

Me and Severus, aged seven months, August, 1960

I handed Snape the photo, which he took with a frown on his face. While he looked at it, I looked at the next photo.

There was Mother again, sitting on a bench in the grounds of the Merrigan Estate. Next to her was my brother, who looked to be about three. His black eyes were avoiding the camera and so he contented himself with looking either at Mother or the grass around him. His facial features hadn't changed a great deal since then, except maybe his face was a little rounder as a three-year-old. I flipped the photo over.

Me and Severus, aged three and a half, July, 1963

Snape's frown deepened further when he took the second photo from me.

"I remember that," he murmured, staring down at it.

"Are they the only two photos she had?" I asked.

"No," he replied. "There are some at home, and some might remain at Father's house. Obviously, Mother treasured these ones the most."

I looked down at the last photo. It was of a good looking woman with long dark hair and dark eyes.

"Ah, Potter's great-grandmother," Snape sneered, looking down at the photo.

"That's Lucia Potter?" I turned the photo over.

Lucia Potter (nee Merrigan), 1965

"If she hadn't existed there would have been no James Potter," he said bitterly.

"But she meant a lot to Mother," I pointed out.

"True. That doesn't excuse her descendants being complete fools."

I placed the photos back in the box and closed the lid. It immediately sealed itself once more and Snape placed it back amongst the pile of boxes.

"Right then," he said, straightening up, "Let's go to your vault then."

The goblin gave us a filthy look when we came out; he clearly hadn't liked to be kept waiting.

"It's his job," Snape muttered in my ear as we moved off towards my vault, number 684.

Merle's vault was nowhere near as big as Snape's, but she had left a considerable amount behind, especially since our house had been sold after her death.

There was much more in there now since the last time I had been there. Besides money, there were many boxes of valuable or cherished items that had belonged to Merle. There were also things that belonged to me; things I had left behind at Merle's house.

In a corner there was a box of old books, journals and albums.

"I had no idea Merle was a book collector," said Snape, as he examined the inside cover of Matteo Van Eijk's Most Captivating Potions of the 17th Century. "This is a first edition."

I shrugged. "She inherited most of them."

While Snape contented himself with looking through the books, I looked through the rest of the various items taken from the house. My music manuscripts were there, as well various magical trinkets that Merle had prized.

I made a small pile of the things I wanted to take with me, and after much hesitation, I added my music book to the pile. Most of the other things were books, photo albums or pieces of jewellery that had belonged to Merle.

Sorting through the last of the boxes, I came across a tiny green box that I hadn't seen in years. Opening it, I saw a small princess cut diamond earring.

"Why is there only one in there?" said a deep voice behind me.

"Because Merle's brother took the other one years ago in a dispute over who was meant to inherit them," I replied, looking closely at the earring. "Apparently they're worth a bit and her brother didn't see why she should have them just because she was female. I think he just wanted to sell them."

Snape frowned. "That's moronic, considering one earring wouldn't get him far."

I shrugged. "I think he was waiting all these years for Merle to just give it up. She had never gotten her ears pierced, so he thought she had no use for them."

"She would have given them to you, though," he said.

"He didn't know about me," I replied. "They had the argument before I was born and as far as I know, he never spoke to Merle after that."

We stared down at the earring. It was amazing how money could divide families.

o o o o o o o o o o o o

It had started to rain by the time Snape and I returned home for lunch. I hoped that it would stop before we returned to Hogwarts late that afternoon.

I went up to my bedroom to put down the things I had brought with me from the bank. When I went back downstairs, I heard voices coming from the breakfast room, where I was supposed to meet Snape for lunch.

The door was wide open, but I walked slowly along the corridor, staying as quiet as I could. I wasn't planning on eavesdropping; I wanted to find out who else was in the room. If it was Lucius Malfoy or another Death Eater, I would sneak back upstairs and wait.

As I got closer to the room, I could make out what they were saying.

"I hope you've taken the necessary steps to stop letters for a separate identity coming to you?" My brother's voice sounded a little angry.

"Of course, Severus. That's not the problem. It's the contents of the letter that's the problem."

That voice was very welcome to me. I moved into the doorway and lingered there for a moment, waiting for the two adults to notice my presence. I didn't want to just barge in.

"Wotcha, Armilla!" Tonks had had her back to me. But at the sound of my footsteps she had spun around. Today, her hair was golden blonde and her eyes were chocolate brown.

Snape, who was standing further away, had an impatient look on his face, and looked agitated.

"Hi Tonks," I said, moving into the room. I addressed myself to my brother. "Do you want me to come back later?" There was obviously something Order related going on and I knew Snape didn't like me knowing everything they did.

"No," he said, after a moment's contemplation. "You may as well stay." I had the impression that he wasn't sure if I should stay.

At that moment Docky appeared. He crept into the room, performed a complicated spell and made our lunch appear on the table.

"Should Docky add an extra plate to the table, Master Severus?" he asked, looking between Tonks and Snape.

"Yes," said Snape.

"No, no," Tonks said hastily. "I can just wait for you two to eat."

"Don't be absurd, Nymphadora," he snapped, glaring at her. "You're not going to watch us eat, so you may as well join us." He sat down at his place at the head of the table.

I sat down at my place, and after a moment's hesitation, Tonks also sat down. Docky performed a similar spell and a plate appeared at her place. He then bowed himself out of the room.

Clearly intent on not wasting time, Snape immediately filled me in on why Tonks was there. "Nymphadora received a letter from Father this morning."

I had been about to put food in my mouth, but at that, I put my fork back on my plate. I never thought that this would have something to do with Father. Tonks had just played the role of dance teacher and friend to the governess when she had visited while I was staying at Father's house.

"Addressed to Mary Donahey?" I said, knowing the answer already.

Tonks merely nodded, looking grim.

"The letter came directly to you?" I pressed her. If Father was tracking mail, it would not do to have Mary Donahey's mail going to Tonks.

"No, it didn't," she replied, shooting a glare at my brother. "As I've already told your brother, Armilla, Dumbledore and I arranged a means by which any mail to Mary Donahey would not come straight to me. I certainly didn't expect to get mail, but there you have it."

"Moving on," Snape said impatiently, after swallowing his food, "What did Father want?"

"He offered me the role of Armilla's governess for the summer period she spends with him," she said, her gaze moving from me to Snape and back again.

All at once I felt a mixture of ecstatic and frightened feelings. It would be wonderful to have Tonks with me the whole time I stayed with Father. But on the other hand, it would be too dangerous. If Tonks was found out...I didn't like to think about the consequences. My better judgement told me that it wasn't fair to put Tonks in such a position.

"Did he mention any reasons for not employing Zita Rougier again?" Snape asked quietly, his face impassive.

Tonks nodded. "All he said was that Rougier was unavailable. He mentioned being very impressed by my professional approach to teaching Armilla to dance, even though I really never did, and he asked if I would be available to live at the house during the time Armilla stays with him."

"You can't," I said softly. "It's too dangerous."

Tonks stared at me, looking worried. "I thought you'd be thrilled by the idea, Armilla."

"I would be thrilled...if it wasn't so dangerous." I met her gaze. "In all honesty, I couldn't imagine you being thrilled by the idea. Would you really want to spend a month there?"

Tonks didn't answer, and I knew she wasn't thrilled with the idea either. Even so, I would have bet that she would put herself forward and do it anyway.

"Armilla is right," Snape said, looking very serious. "It would be a great comfort to have you there with Armilla, but it is just too dangerous. If anything happened...your position should not be put in danger at our expense. The repercussions on both our sides could be disastrous."

Slowly, Tonks nodded. "If you change your mind...you know that I would do it in a second."

Snape and I both nodded.

"Thankyou," said Snape quietly.

Tonks still looked troubled.

"Don't worry," I reassured her. "I don't think Father could find a governess worse than Rougier. It might not be too bad."

Tonks smiled grimly. "I prefer your sarcastic side, Armilla. I can see straight through your optimism."

I shrugged, turning back to my food. "I haven't got anything sarcastic to say." All of a sudden, things seemed gloomy again. I didn't want to think about who Father would hire as the next governess.

Tonks looked down at her plate and continued eating. I noticed that Snape wasn't eating; he was watching me instead, his expression unfathomable.

I looked back at him, waiting for him to say something, but he merely shook his head slightly and continued eating.

Trying to make the conversation cheerful again, as was Tonks' way, she spent the rest of the meal asking me about school, my friends and whether the Weasley twins had been up to no good lately.

By the time she left, she seemed in better spirits, but I could tell that she was worried about the decision we had made.

"Well," said Snape, closing the front door. "It'll be easier to get through this one if you imagine that she had never been asked."

"I suppose," I murmured, looking up at him. He was right. If I spent time thinking about the idea of Tonks playing governess during the summer, I would only become more depressed about going to Father's.

He sighed as he reached out and pulled me into his arms. "I wasn't sure whether or not to let you stay," he muttered. "If you hadn't been there, we might have decided to not tell you about the offer."

"No," I said at once. "I'm glad I know what's going on. It's just bit disappointing, that's all."

"I know," he said, hugging me tighter. "But you'll be going there more prepared than ever. And you'll have your chocolate frog card to communicate with me."

I nodded. "Is it really not worth trying to be optimistic when Tonks can see right through it?"

"I think Nymphadora was just lashing out because she was upset,' he said after a moment. "She would do it if we asked her to."

"I know."

"And I'll be forthright in saying that I think you handled the situation remarkably well," he went on, releasing me so he could meet my gaze. "Not everyone would give up such a desirable situation in such a selfless way. I am exceedingly proud of you."

It was nice to hear such words coming from Snape, but I couldn't appreciate them as much as I wanted to, as I was too busy trying to push Tonks-as-the-governess from my mind without resorting to occluding.

"Don't think on it, Armilla," he said softly. "Give optimism a go."

I shook my head. "Maybe Tonks is right. Maybe sarcasm is a better key to survival."

Snape narrowed his eyes, but I could also see a tiny smile. "If sarcasm was the key to survival, I assure you, Armilla, that we would both live forever."