Armilla

Chapter 17

The next morning I woke to find a bowl of porridge on my bedside table. Snape had obviously left it there and hadn't bothered to wake me. It was stone cold, but as the cheese sandwich the night before had done nothing for my appetite, I ate it anyway. Leaving it there as it was would only give Snape something else to complain about anyway.

I still had no schoolwork to do, so I contented myself with reading my Potions textbook. Yes, very Ravenclaw of me, but I had the sneaking suspicion that when I returned to school, Snape would not be going easy on me in his class. I supposed it would really pain him if his own sister could not prove herself thoroughly adept at his own area of expertise. To save my own neck, I didn't want to make any mistakes, or have Snape put me on the spot with a hard question to try and embarrass me. And so it was that by the time lunchtime came, I had read the book over twice and memorised a large amount of stuff I didn't have to know yet.

I was just wondering if Snape was gong to bother bringing me any lunch when Dumbledore strolled into the room carrying it on a tray, along with some schoolwork. At my failure to suppress my shocked expression, Dumbledore gave a small chuckle.

"I suppose you have gotten used to only seeing Professor Snape around here," he said, merrily. "How have you two been getting along?'' He set the tray down and sat down next to me.

I gave a small shrug. "I don't really see him much, except when he brings schoolwork and meals." I thought for a moment, before adding. "And that is more than enough for me."

Dumbledore laughed again, the twinkle in his eye more pronounced than ever. "Well, Severus was never really one for hospitality, Armilla." He gave me a significant look. "Or should I say Lucia?"

A lump formed in my throat. Lucia Snape. Daughter and sister of Death Eaters.

"No," I said stiffly. "Armilla is my name, and it has been for about fourteen years now. Lucia Snape doesn't exist anymore and nor is she making a reappearance."

Dumbledore looked at me sadly. "No one is going to make you be who you do not want to be, Armilla. As I have said before to another, you alone are in charge of who you are and who you will be in future. To the people who count, your name does not determine your status in our world, your traits or your prospects. Whether you are Armilla Kemp or Lucia Snape, it will not change who you are on the inside."

The lump in my throat was growing bigger. Dumbledore leaned forward and took my hand in his. "Everyone concerned in this only wants the best for you. This recent discovery has of course, caused a tremendous shock for both you and Severus."

I met his gaze. "I've been so desperate to find out who I really was all my life, Professor," I said softly. "Merle was the best parent anyone could ever ask for." I gave a small sigh. "And yet, I still wasn't content. Maybe it was selfish of me to be so anxious to find out who my real family was, when Merle was my family where it really counted."

"No, it wasn't selfish, Armilla," said Dumbledore seriously. "I agree with you whole heartedly that Merle did a splendid job in raising you. It was, however, only natural that you would want to find out more about yourself. In fact, all these years, Merle was just as anxious for you to find your real family because she suspected she would not live into your adult years."

I tried to stifle a sob. I had been trying not to think about Merle over the past few days. There seemed to be so many things I still wanted to say to her, but couldn't now because it was too late.

Dumbledore squeezed my hand. "And so you have found your brother, I hear."

"Yes," I said, trying to sound indifferent. "And neither one of us is thrilled about it."

Dumbledore smiled. "Yes," he admitted. "Severus has related his experience of yesterday to me." He looked thoughtful. "I wouldn't say Severus is disgusted, Armilla. I'd be lying if I said he was thrilled. I think right now that it is just shock. He has found out that one of his Ravenclaw students is his sister and you have found out that the Head of Slytherin is indeed your brother. I suppose to say that you are both shocked is an understatement."

I nodded. "Yes."

Dumbledore looked serious again. "Now," he said. "We do need to discuss the issue of guardianship. As you know, I am only your guardian temporarily and it is my responsibility to find you a suitable guardian, one who is willing to assume responsibility for all your needs."

I felt alarmed. "You're not going to suggest Professor Snape just because he's my brother?"

Dumbledore smiled slightly. "I know that is your mother's wish, Armilla. I have just come from speaking with her. But I know that is not your wish right now."

"No, it really isn't. And I'm sure it's not Snape's wish either."

"Professor Snape, Armilla. At present, Professor Snape does not believe he is...suited to the role of a parent. We did have a discussion about it earlier. But I will say that he is also aware that he cannot neglect you altogether either. He has not denied that he is your brother and it is his duty to assume at least some responsibility for you."

"Duty?" I scoffed. "I'm sure he wishes he had nothing to do with any of this."

Dumbledore looked pensive. "You never know, Armilla. This may turn out to be a blessing in disguise for both of you. I will put myself forward and say that I believe I know Severus better than anyone, and I seriously think you underestimate him."

I said nothing. If Snape wanted to give me a good impression of his character, he would have to show it to me first hand.

"I cannot make all the decisions myself though," Dumbledore went on. "I do have to meet with the Family Services Department the Ministry. I can only put forward recommendations and they have the right to veto any of them." Dumbledore sighed. "Given my reputation with the Ministry at present, I hope they are willing to cooperate with me and not override me just for the sake of it."

"Who do you have in mind, sir?" I asked quietly.

"Well I know a few childless couples who would only be too delighted to have you. I do not mean though to have them take full custody of you. Like I said, Severus has ah...agreed to have a say in some of your dealings."

"Wonderful," I muttered, not really meaning it.

Dumbledore got up to leave. He looked tired and I suddenly felt guilty.

"Thankyou for everything you have done for me these past few days, sir," I said, really meaning it.

Dumbledore smiled. "Always a pleasure to be of service to such a remarkable Ravenclaw...and the younger sister of a dear acquaintance." He turned to leave.

"Sir," I said suddenly. "Professor Snape said I was not to leave my room. Does that mean that once I leave here I can't see my mother at all?"

Dumbledore shook his head. "No, it does not mean that. Tomorrow you go back to school and will have no need to return to this wing. I do not want Professor Umbridge knowing any of these dealings at present. I will remove your mother's ring myself tomorrow and put it away in my office. You will be welcome at any time to come and see her. But you do understand that her presence in the ring will soon come to an end?"

I nodded. "Yes, I understand that."

Dumbledore nodded. "I will speak with you again soon then, once I have met with the Family Services Department."

"Yes, sir."

o o o o o o o o o o o

I spent the afternoon on the schoolwork Dumbledore had left for me and was just finishing it when Snape returned from his afternoon classes.

He strode purposefully into the room and stood at the foot of my bed.

"I trust that the Headmaster spoke with you today?"

'Yes, sir.'

He nodded curtly. "Now that you are returning to classes tomorrow we need to set this story straight."

I nodded.

He folded his arms. "You have been staying with Merle's friend Matilda all this time. Your dealings with Shar are known and we will acknowledge that it happened and that he has been dealt with. He is currently spending a few months in Azkaban."

"Oh," I said. About time someone told me.

Snape continued as if I had said nothing at all. "Your friends may know that Professor Dumbledore is your guardian and that he is currently looking for a family for you. Under no circumstances are you to tell anybody about our relationship. It would threaten my role in the Order and I could not tell you what would happen if the Slytherins found out about you being my sister."

I stared at Snape, slightly shocked. That was the first time he had actually acknowledged that I was his sister.

Snape thought for a moment. "It is highly important that you keep this to yourself, Miss Kemp. The Dark Lord would be most interested to know about you and it goes without saying that then you would be in a very dangerous position. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," I said, very seriously. The idea of You-Know-Who knowing about me had made the lump fall into my stomach. "Do you want this necklace back then, sir?" I asked, touching the fine chain with the pearl that was still around my neck.

Snape stared at it, as if weighing up something in his mind. "The powers of that necklace work outside this wing too," he said. "As long as you wear it I will know if you are safe. I would prefer it if you continued to wear it." His expression was indifferent, but those words sounded as if he was concerned underneath.

"Alright then," I said simply.

Snape nodded and turned to go.

"I will bring your dinner by later," he said, moving towards the door. "Tomorrow you will have breakfast in the Great Hall so be prepared to leave."

"Yes, sir."

The lump that was still in my stomach seemed to say that the worst was still yet to come.