Dusk

Chapter 3: Dreams... upon dreams... upon nightmares...

The voices that were haunting Cho led to her growing increasingly fearful of the night time. Her inner thoughts would taunt and torture her; leading to dreams which soon became nightmares. Outwardly she attempted to remain cheerful, although even those who did not know her so well could easily detect her distress. Some, however, so wrapped up in their own mundane thoughts and desires, remained irritatingly and for themselves, blissfully ignorant...

"Cho! Howrya doin'?"

Cho sighed, recognising the booming voice almost instantly. "Hi, Roger," she said, clearly less than enthused.

"So," he said, sauntering over to her. "Valentine's Day isn't too far off, y'know. Just after Christmas."

Cho's eyes widened. Somehow she managed to contain a shudder. Roger, however, typically mistook this. "You've been waiting for me to ask ya, huh?" He grinned. "I'll put you out of your misery then. Wanna come with me to Hogsmeade Valentine's Day? Who knows, it could be the start of something. Everyone says so you know. We'd be so great together. I wanted to ask you to the Yule ball but Diggory got there first."

Cho felt the bile rise in her throat. "What...what about Fleur?" she asked, somewhat sarcastically, not that she even cared. For him to mention Cedric like that!

"Oh, she had some boyfriend back home. Everyone knew it. That was just a one night thing," he said offhandedly. He then drew closer. "You've been so mopey lately. Let's see if I can't cheer you up then." He winked infuriatingly.

Cho grimaced. "That's a...erm, a really nice offer, Roger," she said, trying not to sound as disgusted as she felt. "But, I don't really think we're..." -he inched closer- "very well suited." Peevishly, she nudged him away. He was clearly shocked. "What?" he yelped. "Don't tell me you're with pretty boy Alastor. I heard Marietta talking."

Cho narrowed her eyes. "No."

"Potter then? That's the latest rumour." Roger shrugged. "Whatever, Chang. Anyway, has Winifred got a date? The fiery blonde? She's your friend, isn't she?" Roger smiled in spite of himself. "You're not the only good looking girl at Hogwarts y'know!"

Cho began to wonder if she could feel any more ill than she did at that precise moment. "You'd better ask her yourself," she managed. "Uh- see you around."

"Bye!" he replied cheerfully. "If you see Winifred, tell her to meet me at the Quidditch pitch after dinner."

Cho went white and ran to the bathrooms, suddenly desperately needing to empty her stomach of every particle of food she had consumed that day.

"Guys! Where have you been?" Winifred met the two girls in the Ravenclaw common room, positively beaming. "Guess who just asked me out!"

Gee, I wonder who, thought Cho moodily. The thought of Roger still turned her stomach.

"Who?" asked Marietta in wonder.

"Roger Davies!"

Marietta squealed. "Roger Davies! How'd you score him? How long has this been going on? Cho, don't tell me you knew about this!"

"Not a thing." Cho lied. "I'm so happy for you, Winifred!"

Winifred's smile widened. "I guess those rumours about him and you really were just that!"

Cho seemed eager to change the subject. "So, uh...what happened?!"

Winifred twirled a strand of hair thoughtfully. "Well, he told me to meet him at the Quidditch pitch after dinner, see, so I snuck out." Winifred tried to speak offhandedly.

Cho detected a flush creeping up Winifred's neck.

"So we talked for a while. Valentine's Day, we're having a big outing! But I'm sure we'll be seeing plenty of eachother before then."

"You've got your work cut out for you, Winifred," Isabelle Tungst laughed, overhearing them during the strenuous task of brushing her hair. "Big shoes to fill. Or should I say, bras?"

Winifred blushed outright. "No need to be graphic!"

Isabelle fingered her chin thoughtfully. "There was that Beaxbatons bimbo, Fleur Delacour. Before Fleur was Ingrid Renéduff. She figured out some charm for her hair that makes it perfect all the time. Since fourth year she's never had a split end or strand of flyaway in her life! Anyway, she dumped him for Alastor Malimban." Isabelle paused dramatically. "I wonder who Alastor dumped Ingrid for. He's single at the moment, as far as I know."

Marietta raised an eyebrow. "What does any of this have to do with Winifred, Isabelle?"

Isabelle shot Marietta a look. "Hm. Well, I know Roger was planning to date Padma Patil, but somehow it never... well, I know that the talk of Padma was after Ingrid. But then "Miss Delacour" came onto the scene and Padma didn't stand a chance... you should have seen her! Its Roger's ar she thought she'd be hanging off at the Yule Ball. Instead she ended up with Ron Weasley."

Winifred and Marietta laughed.

"Not that they exactly hit it off. By the end of the ball she was with some Beaxbatons hunk I think."

"We still keep in contact. He was a nice guy." Padma Patil tapped Isabelle on the shoulder, who was now blushing profusely. "You were saying?"

Marietta didn't even bat an eyelid. She flashed Padma a quick grin. "We were actually talking about Roger. He's just asked out our Winifred!"

The smile fell from Padma's face. "Really. Well, enjoy it while it lasts, Winifred," she said coolly. Isabelle, who had seen many arguments in her time, quickly slipped away, to observe everything from a safe distance and report the incident "accurately" at a more convenient date.

"What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Winifred.

Cho was beginning to see where this was going. She excused herself, although nobody heard her. The fight continued to escalate.

"Just because he didn't like you, Padma, doesn't make him a bad guy!" Winifred's voice had almost raised to a shriek.

"Unbelievable!" Padma's voice had raised to equal pitch and stature. "You're an absolute idiot, Winifred, if you think he's in it for your sparkling personality!"

Slap.

Cho turned back around, suddenly sensing that the fight had gone a little beyond the stage of semi friendly bickering.

"How dare you!" Padma cried.

Slap.

"Guys, stop it," Marietta was saying desperately, as the two girls began to strangle eachother. "Cho! Do something!"

Cho and Marietta began to try and pry them apart. "Stop it! You're both acting like two year olds."

Padma and Winifred were both, however, having difficulty hearing.

"Jealous bitch!"

"Stupid cow!"

"Whore!"

"Whore!"

"STOP IT!" Cho screamed. Marietta's eyes widened as far as they could go. Padma and Winifred stopped, stunned. The silence in the common room was deathly.

"You heard me!" Cho's eyes were ablaze, her whole body shaking with fury. "Roger's alive, isn't he? He's a prat but he's still alive!" Tears had begun to flow freely down her cheeks. "So who cares? There's no need to be jealous, Padma, it'll

probably be you again next week!" The pink circles on Padma's cheeks reddened and deepened.

"It's not like he cares. It's not like he cares about either of you, or anyone but himself!"

"I knew it," said Winifred angrily, when she had caught her breath from shock. "You've wanted him for yourself all along!"

"DON'T BE AN IDIOT!" Cho shrieked. "That jerk? I turned him down and I'd do it

again! How could an arrogant pig like that compare to Cedric?!"

The tension in the room reached breaking point.

"What's going on here?" Professor Sinistra demanded, appearing seemingly out of nowhere. She flushed angrily. "Have you girls any idea what time it is? Fighting and screaming, its a wonder you haven't woken the entire school!"

Cho, Winifred and Padma were sobbing too stormily to respond. Awkwardly, Marietta stepped forward. "Er..."

"Bed!" shouted the Professor, who seemed momentarily too furious to form complete sentences. "NOW! You should be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves! And that goes for everyone in this room!"

Marietta suddenly became conscious of the ten or so other girls in the room who had been watching the proceedings with great interest. "What are you lot looking at?

Nothing to see here!" she snarled. When she turned back around the three fighting girls had gone. "They all ran off," said Judith quietly, when no one spoke.

Marietta gave Judith a withering look and stormed off herself.

Cho, meanwhile, was lying in bed, shaking uncontrollably, trying desperately to understand what was happening to her. Was that me? she wondered. Did I really say and do those things? The fact that her throat felt sore and dry made her realise that it hadn't been some terrifying dream.

What did I tell you, Cho. Your life's falling apart! You need Harry, and everything will be back to normal.

"I...I tried," whispered Cho, her aching eyes filling with tears once more. "But it didn't work."

Try harder. The voice became more insistent. Try harder. Today wasn't the best you could do, was it? You need to kiss him. You know he's had a crush on you before, you know he'll jump at the opportunity.

"I- yes, I'll do it," said Cho miserably.

Really? I don't think you can. I don't think you will. You're weak, Cho Chang. Look at you! Crying and whimpering all the time. You're pathetic and weak.

"I'm not! I can and will."

Suddenly a figure marched in and turned the light on in a single swift and fluid movement. It was Marietta.

"Who do you think you're talking to?" she whispered angrily. "You've completely lost your mind, Chang! Get a grip!"

"I must have been talking in my sleep," said Cho dully. "I'm sorry if I woke you. You snore, you know, so I wouldn't get so high and mighty about it. Ever heard me complaining?"

But Marietta was not about to be drawn from her concrete grounds onto dubious paths of the abstract. "What was that spiel about Cedric today supposed to be about? Don't you understand he wouldn't have wanted it this way? Its been months, Cho! Nearly a year! Pull yourself together!"

For a moment Cho felt like screaming again. She controlled herself. "Marietta...I'm fine," she said, with increasing difficulty. "I was angry at Padma and Winifred for being halfwits today, and I guess I just took it a little far."

"A little far!" whispered Marietta shrilly. "A little far? You went into hysterics! I don't call that a little far!"

Cho avoided Marietta's piercing stare.

"Well, you can join Harry as a hot topic in breakfast conversation. No doubt "Isabellaaar" was taking notes," said Marietta scornfully, imitating Isabella's snooty accent. "She's going to give great big drawn out descriptions to everyone. I can see it

now." Marietta rolled her eyes. "The rumours are going to get even sicker than they already are."

"I don't care," said Cho coldly. "Do you mind, Marietta? Believe it or not, I'm kind of tired."

Marietta shook her head in disbelief and turned the lights off.

***

To Cho's dismay, Marietta had indeed be correct. The awkward stares that greeted

her in the Common Room that morning were to be expected, but when she went to the

Great Hall at breakfast it seemed as if everyone was looking at and talking about her.

Cho made her way next to Marietta, feeling intensely self conscious. Winifred instantly stood up, her eyes flashing. "Are you coming, guys?"

Violet shot Cho a desperate look and joined Winfred, who was now laughing and talking to Padma Patil. Clearly, the two had resolved their "dispute". Arianne, however, lingered. "She's still mad at you," she said quietly, glancing furtively Winifred and Violet who were making a great display of laughing and having a good time. "This is so weird and awkward. Can't you just apologise?" When Cho didn't reply, she sighed and left the table.

Marietta patted Cho's hand awkwardly. "Don't worry...they'll get over it." Her grasp tightened. "Sorry about last night. I shouldn't have been so hard on you. But I still stand by what I meant. You need to deal with the problems you're having! You're still having those dreams, aren't you."

Head down, Cho nodded.

"Stop tormenting yourself," said Marietta, almost pleadingly. "If you're not going to talk to me, talk to somebody at least. You can't go on like this! And...neither can I."

Cho withdrew her hand. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Marietta breathed deeply. "It means, your constant emotional outbursts are affecting me. There's only so much I can do...and take. We all loved Cedric, even though I'll never be able to understand the extent of the pain you must be going through. But its...Cho, don't look at me like that!"

Cho snapped her mouth closed. She flung her bag over her shoulder and left the Great Hall without another word.

Her great, dignified strides soon turned into a run. She tore blindly into the hospital wing and nearly bowled over an already flustered Madame Pomfrey. "My dear, what is it?" she demanded, startled.

"Sick," Cho gasped. "I'm not...I mean, I'm feeling...I..."

"Queasy, is it?" Madame Pomfrey shook her head dejectedly. "Honestly, you're the ninth child this morning! There were some negative reactions to last night's rice pudding." She led Cho gently to a clean bed. "Lie down for now, dear. Someone ought to give the house elves a good talking to!"

Cho listened to Madame Pomfrey's footsteps fade away and exhaled deeply. Marietta was wrong, cruel, and selfish. What did she know about suffering, or love? But...it was all becoming a bit much. If only everything didn't seem to remind her so much of

Cedric! If only she did love Harry...she wished desperately that she could. Cho squeezed her eyes shut, unsuccessfully stemming the flow of tears. When she felt as though her eyes were open once more she was no longer consciously in the hospital wing, but in the midst of another daunting and confusing nightmare...

For the first time in months, however, there was no hint of anything sinister; just a wild, grassy dream, with a brook chattering cheerfully through its midst. Cho's senses were intoxicated with the fresh, dewy scent in the air; the pleasant feel of the cool breeze blowing gently upon her bare legs. More than anything she was struck by the warmth, from the bright and glorious sun that shone radiantly down upon her.

"Is this paradise?" wondered Cho aloud, almost stupidly. She recognised Cedric's boyish laughter ringing around her.

"No. No its not. It's just a place I knew you'd like."

Cho swallowed desperately at the sound of Cedric's voice. "Come and talk to me! Please..."

Cedric seemed to ignore this. "I just want you to know that its ok, Cho. Listen to me, all right? Its ok."

"What are you talking about?"

Unseen fingers played with Cho's hair. "You know."

When Cho rushed a hand to her scalp, the invisible fingers had already gone. She felt a desperate need to be near Cedric, a need that was stronger than ever. "I don't care about Harry," she shouted. "I just...I just want to be near you. Where are you? Let me see you, please, Cedric. Just for a minute."

"All right, Cho, all right. Look to the water."

Cho turned around and saw something so beautiful, tears sprung in her eyes. Water from the brook had risen in a powerful torrent and somehow, miraculously taken Cedric's form. The figure extended his clear, glistening hand to her, the water swirling and circulating over and through his body. The effect was blinding; as dazzling as if he had been carved from diamond.

She ran to him and threw her weak, pale arms around him. "I want to die now," she murmured. "I want to die now and stay in this wonderful place with you."

"Cho...I want you to know that its ok," he whispered back. "Harry and I are connected, its inescapable. You must be with him."

But Cho didn't want to hear about Harry. "I tried," she said softly. "But its not the same." She ran a hand through the clear, slippery locks of hair.

"Try harder." Cedric's voice had grown harder and more insistent. Suddenly, Cho recognised the conversation she had had in her mind earlier.

"No," she choked, clutching a hand instinctively to her throat. She turned away from Cedric, wanting desperately to realise what was happening to her. "Wake up, Cho, do you hear me?"

"It's no use hiding from it Cho." Cedric's voice was hollow. "The feelings for him are there."

Cho ignored him. "Wake up," she cried. "Please...wake UP!"

The hospital wing filled with Cho's petrified screams.