Out of Control

Chapter 1

Blind

It was a lazy sort of day. The heat hung heavy on the ground. Even the birds were silent, having found solace in the cool inner reaches of the forbidden forest. James stepped out of the doors of the castle and stooped to sit for a moment. The heat was a shock and he was tempted to rethink his plan to go flying after all. But a breeze tickled the treetops and he knew the temperature would be much cooler when he was fifty feet up. He clutched a sweaty hand around his broom and set off across the grass.

The grounds in front of the castle were strangely deserted. Most students had clearly chosen to spend the last Saturday of the term studying in the comfort of the castle. James shivered despite the heat, as he recalled the why he'd decided to come outside in the first place. He'd thought it might help to clear his head. His friends were all clambering to make plans for the summer and worrying about their upcoming NEWTs. It seemed like a reasonable thing to be anxious about, but test results were the furthest thing from James Potter's mind that afternoon.

He reached a small rise in the lawn, threw his leg over his broom, and kicked hard off the ground. Rising quickly into the air, he looked out across the lake. The glassy surface was marred only by the giant squid as it swam in lazy circles near the shore. James flew low. Stretching his upper body out along the length of the broom handle, he reached down and splashed his fingers into the water. He rolled upside down and dunked the top of his head in the lake. The only time his hair wasn't sticking out at all angles was when it was soaking wet.

Suddenly there was a splash off to his left. He righted himself with ease and looked around. Someone was skipping rocks from beneath a large beech tree on the shore. He flew closer. His heart leapt into his throat as he realized who it was.

"Lily," he called across the lake. She ignored him. She skipped another pebble across the water and picked up the book that had been lying open beside her. As James flew closer, he could see that she was smiling. He stopped short and hovered a few feet above her.

She looked up from her book and gave him a wry smile. "Showing off again Potter?"

"What, for you?" he asked nonchalantly, with a smile in his brown eyes.

She laughed and James felt his heart leap a second time. He fervently hoped he had the courage to carry through with his plan, although he hadn't expected the moment to come so soon.

He flew up into the air and did a loop over one of the lower tree branches.

"Stellantis," he said, and a shower of silver stars fell from the end of his wand and onto his girlfriend. She giggled as the magic brushed her skin.

"That would be showing off," he said. "I didn't realize there was anyone else out here until I saw your beautiful face from across the lake just now."

"You knew it was me from so far away," she stated.

James dropped down to the ground, his face serious now. His heartbeat quickened as their eyes locked.

"If I was blind, I would see you," he said softly. He watched as a blush covered her cheeks. The heat rose in his own face as he looked steadily into her eyes. She swallowed hard and shifted to cross her legs.

"Can you get off that thing for a minute and come sit with me?" Lily asked, breaking his gaze.

"Nope," he replied with a smile as he flew back towards the lake.

James' heart was pounding. Just looking into her eyes made him breathless with ...love? ...terror? ...something. He wondered how he would ever be able to complete his task.

The wind whipped his face as he flew higher. He needed more space. There had to be more space up higher. He only slowed down when he saw that the castle was a tiny, pointy speck below him. James began to fly in aimless circles. Being with Lily had always made him feel a little out of control, but this was ridiculous. She could make his heart race with a word. Her touch made his skin hum. Where was the cool and confident James Potter now? Sirius would be doubled over with laughter if he could see the state his friend was in now. And that was precisely the reason why James had chosen to not to confide in him, just this once.

"You've simply got to do it," Remus' words echoed in his head. "Think of the consequences if you don't."

It was this statement that had finally prompted James to make a decision. He couldn't lose her. Lily Evans was his soul mate; she was the one. He felt the weight of his decision press against his chest, beneath his robes. He began a slow descent towards his lovely Lily, his resolve hardened. James knew what he had to do.