Through Tinted Windows

Chapter 5

To dance along greening leaves into the sexual sunlight.

-Sylvia Plath

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"Hermo-ninny..." The voice so agonizingly familiar made the situation even more real. Viktor Krum stood to greet her, but it was more like a forced acknowledgement. Her eyes strayed to Snape in attempt to find refuge and he, who had been watching her, glowered back at her. It seemed to say 'who the hell is this guy?' without some verbal exchange. Seeing him brought back the sense of safety she recalled having felt when she had been carried in his arms.

She practically scampered over to him, her posture as stiff as it could be and had the overwhelming urge to hide behind him and tell him to send her fears away with the departure of the man seated before the two of them. Instead, she merely stood beside Snape and took hold of his hand behind the flowing sleeve of his robes. Much to her surprise, he in turn took hold of it and gave a squeeze, giving her the courage to confront her guest.

With a pointed look, but slightly tremulous voice, she said to Krum, "State your business, please."

His brows pushed farther together - if it was even achievable - and then he glanced up at Snape. "Would it be possible to speak to you alone?" His foreign accent was thick on his tongue as he spoke.

Hermione leaned into the comfort of Snape's robes, feeling the warmth of him emanating through. The thought of being alone with this man caused her to flinch inwardly though she fought hard not to show she was deterred. Being alone with him meant he would assault her and she would have no one there to help her. She stiffened even more and pressed farther into the form beside her. As if answering her prayers, Snape spoke up.

"Do I look like I trust you enough to leave the both of you alone?" he shot back, unable to stop himself from entering the conversation. He glared at the younger man. "Go on and tell her what you must. I assure you, I will be listening to every word."

At his interjection, she perceptibly loosened her death-like grip on his hand and regained her self-confidence. Her eyes were more colder than fearful making Snape want to smile. Krum looked at the older wizard in an angry gaze but went on and spoke. His eyes went back to Hermione with a look of puppy-dog despair. Hermione almost sneered. Despicable little prick.

"I think it would be better if you leave the room, Severus," she declared in a solid voice that had her inwardly startled. To make some visual assurance, she turned her face in time to catch his look of surprise.

The shocked expression did not last long for it was instantly covered by a heavy scowl. She gave a small smile and nudged him on his side with their clasped hands. Taking this as a reassurance, he nodded curtly and, breaking from her grasp, promptly left. She felt partly empty without his presence, but she had been reminded of her months of training to grow stronger and more callous just in case she had an encounter such as today with Krum. She turned her head back and eyed him coolly as she folded her arms over her chest. For a while, neither spoke as she assessed him coldly and he planned his next move. His perceptible step towards her brought her to narrow her gaze.

"Hermo-ninny, I miss you. I want you to come back with me." It was said in a whisper, as if to express his sincerity, but she saw past that front and saw the hardness that had crept into his eyes as he spoke; the apparent annoyance at the level he had to stoop down to in order to get her back.

She let out an outraged gasp. "What do I look like to you? A damn rag doll that you can throw around when you feel like it then put on a shelf until you feel like playing again?"

"How can you say such a thing?" he asked incredulously. The accent had grown thicker with his rising emotional imbalance, making it harder for Hermione to follow what he was saying. He gave her an frustrated scowl and threw out his hands. "Look, I've changed. Let me prove that I'm not the maniac you think I am. I admit that I've done a few things that I'm not proud of -"

She snorted, cutting him off. "A few? You did more than a few things wrong, Viktor," she seethed, unfolding her arms and pointing at him accusingly as her eyes narrowed to mere slits. "And how dare you confront me - more than half a year after what you did - and expect to win me back by saying a few meaningless lines! God, it disgusts me to even think that I found you even remotely decent as an individual."

Pushed over the limit of his patience, he took a menacing step towards her and glowered at her forgetting about his fake façade. "You listen here, you unappreciative little bitch. You are coming with me whether you like it or not. I have staked claim on you and even if your unwilling I'm taking you -" he sneered vilely " - in more than one context."

Hermione felt her insides twist and the urge to vomit came back more intense than previously. Thinking of another tactic to throw him off, she lifted her chin defiantly and retorted, "You can't have me because I'm already taken."

He simpered, placing his hands on his hips, his chest thrust out in an arrogant manner. For a moment she almost gave in to laughing hysterically as she recalled the image of Peter Pan in the same stance. "Let me guess," he gibed as his lips curled darkly, revealing sharp incisors. "The old man is your boyfriend?"

"Is that so hard to believe?" Her palms felt sweaty and her knees felt like giving way from all the apprehension she was trying to hide. "He's a good man, Viktor; nothing like you." She was partially surprised by the statement she gave for it was heartfelt; something that she would not have believed herself to think had she still been at school and not in the confusion she was in now.

"Sure, the ex-Death Eater would love you and care for you," he mocked, before his rage overcame his expression. "You're probably making all that up on the spot from what I see on your face." He took a step closer to her, his eyes gleaming - oh so menacingly. She had to prevent herself from taking a step back.

"Fine, I'll call him and prove it to you!" She turned and went to the door, but his grip on her shoulder stopped her. Her skin began to crawl at his touch and she flinched, but he could not see.

"I don't trust you. I'll call him instead and you stay here, or I'll finish all of this here."

Her abdomen flexed and she pursed her lips. He came around her, staring fiercely at her before composing himself, then going out the door. He didn't have to go far for a few feet away from the door was Snape, leaning against the wall, staring hard at the other end of the hall. From where she stood, there was a faint murmur of exchanged and Krum came back with a leering look on his face. He past by her and soon enough, there came the older man in all his monochrome presence. He had an exasperated look on his face.

"You could just make up your mind, woman, before you send someone to do something," he admonished so lightly that she could almost see him wagging a finger at her.

It was odd for Hermione because there was a hint of tease and warmth twisted in his voice. Her back was still to Krum and she mouthed for him to 'play along' with what she was about to do. He didn't seem to notice the message she was relaying, causing her to feel even more jumpy than before. Before she could do anything, he slung an arm around her and turned her so they both faced Krum.

"Since you've called me back, does this mean that you are going to inform me of your current relationship of my fiancé?" Snape's silky voice rolled over her and she could feel the tension leave her body limp in his hold. "From what I see, you're a - friend - that she hasn't seen for quite some time."

The smile on the Bulgarian's lips faltered slightly and his eyes wavered at what he had said. "Your... fiancé"

Fueled now but the scheme that seemed to be working, she looked up and beamed at him, bringing her arm around his waist. "He didn't believe me, Sev. I told him that I was already yours, but -" she shrugged. The hand around her shoulder tightened, pulling her closer to him. She felt totally enveloped in Snape; herbs and different potions clung to his robes - some scents sweet, others bringing her back to the dank dungeons in the bowels of Hogwarts. That with the memory of the texture of his timbre when he spoke just recently... she could drown in him. It was Krum's voice that invaded her cloud of growing dreams, bringing her back into the harsh reality of the situation.

"Since when?" he rasped, his eyes now narrowed and piercing, the agitation not quite hidden any longer.

Severus gazed down at Hermione lovingly and - with a free hand - played with a damp lock of hair that had fallen onto her face. "Since a month ago. It won't be a few more before we're officially man and wife, however. She insisted that we go through some Muggle process of waiting a while longer -"

"Merlin's beard! You'll never have her! Not for as long as I live!" The foreigner's explosion jolted Hermione. He took a daunting step towards the two, his chest heaving as his gaze raked obsessively over her. In an impulsive frenzy, Snape pushed her behind him and shielded her from Krum snapped his furious gaze at him.

"Get out of my way, old man," Krum spat vehemently. "You don't want to hurt that cripple body of yours."

"Think I'm frail, do you? Go ahead and try me, you ignorant fool," the potions master goaded, his head tilted up in arrogance.

The other man's eyes narrowed and before Hermione could cry out a warning, he whipped out his wand and began to shout a curse. Snape, despite his seniority to the other man, was apparently faster than the younger male and yelled "Expelliarmus!"

The wand flew across the room, giving Hermione the window of opportunity to assault him with her self defense skills. With a battle yell, she pushed her way in front of Snape - much to his outrage - and punched Krum square on the nose. With as much force as possible, she brought her knee up and slammed it right in his groin. He gave a shriek of pain and fell to the ground on all fours, his blood splattering across the floor. Unable to help herself, she kicked him in his stomach and he fell with an 'Oof!' causing her to smirk in absolute satisfaction.

"That," she huffed, "was for all the things you put me through." She looked down at his worthless form, brushing her hands against each other.

Snape, who had watched the whole thing dumbfoundedly, could do nothing more but raise a brow at her when she faced him. Shaking his head, he picked the fallen man up in by the back of his shirt and promptly threw him out of the cottage. The man groaned in agony at the impact of his already bruised body hit the ground. Snape turned his nose up at him.

"Don't you dare go near her again or you'll be sorry," he growled possessively before turning away slamming the door smartly behind him.

Hermione watched Snape - in a tumult of madness - as he picked up her worst memories and walked away with it. He was lost in the hallways when she heard the resolute slamming of the door. Her heart was palpitating against her ribcage, her breaths coming out in irregular breaths. She had conquered her fears all in one flashing moment. The footsteps advancing towards her brought her to realize that she could not have done it alone. On impulse, she threw herself towards him as he came within a reasonable distance from her. She held him tightly, not caring that he held himself stiff against her. She just wanted to express her thanks without speaking, knowing that her throat was not ready for such a feat.

She drew in a shuddering breath before she started to pull away, only to be brought back tightly into a fierce embrace. I love his good smell and his body that fits with mine as if they were made in the same body-shop to do just that.* They stayed like that for a while, silently drinking in the moment while it could last.

"You foolish woman," he reprimanded almost affectionately. "Thank your lucky stars that things had not gone worse than they already were."

They separated - though not fully - and she looked up at him with slight confusion. "How did you -"

"I told you that I didn't trust him," he interrupted in his silky voice - she had to suppress the urge to shudder in reaction to the sound. "I actually had the audacity to eavesdrop on the whole of your conversation and merely stationed myself at a distance where it would have been impossible for me to comprehend the muffled conversation that the two of you were having." He gave her a smug look then. "He is a stupid man."

"I must agree, though it somewhat embarrasses me that I actually -" she cut herself off promptly, refusing to say anymore.

The amusement died in his gaze and immediately narrowed at the reaction. He let his grasp on her fall as he placed them, folded over his chest in an almost ominous manner. "I believe that you at least owe me an explanation for this commotion."

The chocolate brown eyes that had just expressed so much relief and joy withdrew once again behind a suffused look and she gave him a wary glance. He, irritated that she would suddenly have the impulse to do such a thing, snorted and turned to leave.

"Wait." He berated himself for even getting himself into the mess.

"Severus, wait!" He should have left her to fend for herself when the Krum character came to abuse her.

"Dammit, stop right there!" He paused right at the door, but didn't look back, refusing to come face to face with this woman who brought out the best and worst of him.

"Must you always react to the harsh demands?" she bit out.

"Must you?" he shot back. "You refuse to at least further explain this - this insane encounter with a man that I know little to nothing about. And here you are saying that I always react to orders rather than requests?"

"I know," she sighed sadly, making him turn his head slightly to get at least a bit of a glimpse of her now slumped figure. "I just despise talking about it. It's a defense mechanism - something like hiding under the coverlet of one's bed: if you can't see them, they can't see you."

Her fingers pulled at each other out of habit at times of great insecurity. A large pale hand slid over them, startling Hermione enough to quit her fidgeting. She looked up at Snape, who's emotions were heavily guarded behind the aloof teacher look he would always have when she came into the dungeons while he graded papers. "He poses no threat to you now. Not as long as you have me around."

She felt like melting into his encircling warmth - something she hadn't thought possible... not with Snape anyway. She was only capable of swallowing visibly and stare at him in awed silence. She looked down after a time, and slowly pulled her hands out from underneath his one. Smacking her dry lips, she made a sideways glance towards the settee and cringed inwardly.

"Could we, ah, could we talk about this somewhere else?"

He nodded somewhat curtly and turned a heel, proceeding towards the kitchen. When they finally got there, she noted that there was fresh tea on the table and immediately helped herself to some. As she did, Snape merely sat across from where she was and watched he with a measured gaze. He waited patiently until she was at least remotely comfortable before he spoke.

"What happened?" It was simple and bluntly stated as he didn't know how else to ask it without sounding like too much of a psychiatrist.

She stared down at her steaming cup unable to speak yet. The explanation started slowly, the words hard to say, the memories painful to recall, even when she faced its source in a most valiant manner. It didn't take long, however, before the words came tumbling out in a rush of mixed emotions, some tears seeping into her eyes before they were blinked away. Hermione didn't know how long the story lasted, but by the end, her voice was hoarse from overuse. Her cup was now cold and still at the same height as it had been before she started, and she realized she had not even taken a break to sip at least a bit of her tea. Hesitantly, she stole a glance at Snape who barely twitched a muscle in the duration of the speech.

"Do you still hold those same beliefs now?" he asked suddenly.

She blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

"Pre-marital sex, Hermione," he replied in a smooth and casual way, as though he was talking about how to create the Veritaserum Potion. "Do you still think that it is wrong for a couple to consummate their relationship before being bound by law?"

Her eyes widened and she looked back down at her cup, flabbergasted. "I - I..." she stuttered, embarrassed that he would even bring such a thing up, considering their current situation.

"You shouldn't be humiliated by such talk, Hermione. I am aware that such a topic is not discussed between normal acquaintances, but under the circumstances, I cannot help but be curious as to what your answer would be."

"I... well I guess I still don't believe in it," she stammered, a blush faintly tinting her cheeks. "I mean, one's ah - purity should be a gift to the one you are to marry, no?"

"I must agree with you there. However," he added. "Some people may argue that joining with another may save a lot of hardships in the future. The sexual attraction might be mistaken for actual love and finally when they marry and have sex, they break themselves from those same vows because they realize their mistake. So you might say that the whole deal with sleeping with the man you're with is some sort of trial as to whether it will be a lasting relationship or not. The whole purity factor is merely an extra for those who find -" he paused, almost choking, not really wanting to say the word but proceeding anyway "- true love the first time."

Overcoming her previous reluctance to discuss such matters, she hummed in thought and looked at him in a thoughtful manner. "Wow, I hadn't really thought of it that way."

"Well," he responded drily. "Age does have its advantages."

"So does that mean that you've done - it - before?" She felt almost childish by avoiding the usage of the word she meant, but how could she blame herself? This was no scientific discussion about lab rats and mating moths.

He smirked, amused by her attempts to keep it comfortable for herself. "If you must know, I have."

"How many times?" she blurted out, and blushing once again. "I mean, how many times have you believed yourself in love with someone?"

He snorted at that. "Hermione, those are two different questions."

She couldn't hold back a gasp. He almost roared in laughter at her innocence. Who would have thought that Hermione Granger would be ignorant of such things even when she had friends like Mr. Weasley and Mr. Potter? "But I must draw the line there for those are very personal questions that I am not ready to give out just yet."

"Oh." Her expression was somewhat crestfallen, to Snape's surprise. She stood up suddenly and pushed her chair back. Smiling distractedly at him, she made a move to leave. "I feel a bit tired right now, Severus. I think I might turn in and nap for a while. Please wake me when dinner is served." She walked as far as halfway to the exit before she paused. "Uhm... and Severus?"

He grunted in response. "Thank you for listening."

"Thank you for telling me," he replied as she made her way out. He sighed tiredly when her footsteps receded down the hall. The whole deal that he had been flung into was really taking a lot of his energies. Hermione was a big puzzle that was not difficult to pick, but strenuous nonetheless as she was still stubborn about a lot of things. Then again, he told himself as he cleared the table up with his mere will, he was just as stubborn as she. The two of them together made it all harder.

He couldn't help but feel a certain connection with her, both in the physical sense that he had discovered the first time they reunited at the auction to the emotional sense that he had just found recently. It had taken a while for him to admit it and he was reluctant to express any of his feelings to her. He would not be a fool and fall for another woman who would most certainly turn him down. No, he told himself with a bitter expression, after last time, I refuse to get into this business. Satisfaction be damned.