The Story of Lily

The Story of Lily

Chapter Nine: James's Promise

"Goodbye! I will miss you, Lilee!" Ella pulled back from hugging Lily and gave her a mock-serious look. "Now, I want no messazesfrom Professor Dumbly-dorr zat yoo 'ave broken a rule."

Lily grinned. "I'll try my best," she said happily. For the first time in years, Lily had left her fiery red hair down from its usual ponytail. It was in gentle, almost non-existent waves to the middle of her back. The glasses she used to wear only because she didn't draw much attention in them no longer framed her large, crystal-clear, green eyes.

Lily was standing in the middle of Platform Nine and Three Quarters with witches and wizards of all ages swarming around her. She sighed wistfully. This would be her last year at Hogwarts, and she was determined to make it her best. She gripped the cage that held her owl, Iris, tightly as she prepared to board the train. She was shaking with nerves; what if her friends didn't want her back?

Lily hugged Ella one last time and boarded the Hogwarts' Express. She wandered around the train, peering in the compartments, searching for a familiar face. She didn't have to wait long, though. As she was passing by, a compartment to her right burst open and a tall, raven-haired witch burst out yelling, "SIRIUS BLACK! You'll pay for this, I sw-"

She was cut off when she hit Lily, and Lily felt her breath catch when the black haired witch saw who she was.

Gwen looked at her curiously for a moment, and then whispered, "Lily?" in a very disbelieving tone.

Lily nodded weakly.

"Oh - oh Lily! Are you - d'you wantto come and sit with us?" she asked pleadingly.

"I - I suppose," Lily answered nervously. She gripped Iris's cage even tighter and walked into the compartment. It went deathly quiet, and four shocked faces stared at her.

"Lily?" Remus whispered.

Lily was only able to nod; there was a large lump in her throat. She found her voice and said, "Before - before you all say anything, I want you to know that I don't hate you, and I never did. I only acted like that because I thought I was doing the right thing."

"Lily - what?" James asked, rising and walking toward her.

Lily's face flushed and she stared at the floor. How was it that James still made her pulse quicken, her palms sweaty? When she lifted her head up, there were tears shining in her eyes. "I - well, there's something I need to tell you all." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes briefly. "I'm the Adviser."

A stunned silence filled the compartment. "You - you're sure?" Gwen breathed.

"Of course I'm sure. I've known since I was thirteen," Lily said dryly.

"Wow," was all that was said for a moment, until-

"Oh Lily, we've - we've really missed you!" Gwen exclaimed, her voice shaking dangerously. Before Lily knew what happened, Gwen's arms were around her, squeezing her tightly. Lily shifted and hugged her properly.

When Gwen stepped away, Sirius's strong arms circled her as well, uncharacteristically serious, his face raw with emotion. "Lily, I missed you too - you're really my sister, you know that."

Lily felt her eyes well up with tears, and she smiled at him. "I know, you're really my brother, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I shut you all out."

James hugged her next, his touch making her skin prickle and her heart light, as she had suspected. Remus hugged her as well, followed even by little Peter. They had a very enjoyable trip down talking about anything and everything. Lily told them of how scared she had been for them, and how visiting Violet's grave had made her decide to become their friend again and apologize. However, she kept Violet's apparition to herself.

They soon arrived at Hogwarts, Lily's mood better than it had been in years. She, Mary Katherine, Gwen, Hayley, Sirius, James, Remus and Peter stayed up until a very ungodly hour chatting by the fire in the common room. As Lily headed up to her own dorm after seeing her friends into theirs, she resolved to talk to Professor Dumbledore as soon as possible - she wanted to be in the normal dorm for the rest of her seventh year.

~*~*~*~*

"Lily!"

Lily groaned and Gwen grinned at her. Ever since she had come out of her shell, she had been receiving a lot more attention than she had in years, especially from the opposite sex. She had even acquired her own "fan club", boys who asked her to Hogsmeade all the time and not very inconspicuously followed her around. The two girls were walking to their last class of the afternoon - Lily had Study of Ancient Runes while Gwen had Muggle Studies.

When Lily turned around, she was relieved that it was James who was calling her, not some pathetic fifth year boy asking her to go to Hogsmeade with him.

She flashed smile. "Hi James."

He was out of breath, and he made a few spluttering noises while clutching his chest and finally managed, "Only - only...just...got - away..."

Gwen looked very pleased. "Escaped your admirers, James?"

He gave her a murderous glare. "Where're yours, Watson?"

"Oh, I told them Lily and I were going to go to pluck our nose hairs, and they scattered." She grinned.

James looked impressed. "I should try that sometimes," he said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, but they'll be back, of course," Lily said miserably. "Last week I finally had to get Sirius."

"Ah." James understood perfectly. Sirius was very protective of Lily, maybe a bit too much for his liking, but of course, he would never say that. "So Lily, walk with me to Runes?"

"You take Ancient Runes?" Gwen asked as the trio began walking again.

"Yeah, I dropped Muggle Studies."

Gwen got a very panicked look on her face. "No - tell me you didn't!"

"Yeah, I did. Sorry Gwen," he smirked at her.

She buried her face in her hands, then jerked it up quickly. "I hate you! Now I'm going to have to sit with those bloody - bloody prats without you to protect me!" she moaned.

"Don't worry, Sirius switched from Care of Magical Creatures to Muggle Studies. You'll be fine. Besides, isn't Hayley in that class?"

"Yeah, but she's no fun. I mean, I love her to death, but she can get really annoying."

They came to a break in the corridor. "Well, see you at dinner," Gwen said miserably as she slouched down the left corridor.

"Bye Gwen," Lily said sympathetically.

James and Lily made it through Ancient Runes by sitting in the last two desks in the corner and praying not to be seen, but it was futile. James looked quite angry when he saw boys were trying to talk to Lily; she had a feeling he wanted to talk to her alone.

After class, they hurried out of the room and broke into a sprint. Suddenly, James grabbed Lily by the waist and pulled her behind a tapestry and into a corridor she had never seen before.

"Where are we?" she asked, peering around at the deserted corridor.

"We just have to walk down this corridor and through another passage and we'll end up near the Prefect's bathroom."

"Oh," she nodded her head and smiled.

James grinned down at her - he was a good six inches taller than she was - and slung his arm around her shoulders. "Alone at last," he sighed.

Lily heartbeat quickened. She didn't trust her voice, so she merely nodded her head and smiled some more.

"You know, Lils, I think you've been alone with everyone except me," James said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I think so," she said quickly.

"You know, I really did miss you," he said quietly.

Lily was so absorbed in what he said, she didn't realize he had stopped. She closed her eyes for a minute, swallowed, and turned. "Yeah, I - I missed you too," she said truthfully. Lily said it to his chin; she didn't dare look into his eyes.

To late - soon she felt his warm fingers lift her chin gently so she was staring him in the eyes.

"Promise me you won't do that again...I couldn't bear to lose you," James said a bit hoarsely.

"I promise," she said, her eyes welling up with tears.

James noticed the tears and instantly took on a look of concern. He hugged her to him and she began to cry. They sat down on the filthy floor together, Lily crying into James's shoulder.

"I didn't mean to make you cry," he said sincerely.

She smiled and wiped her tears. "It's okay, I've been threatening to do that for a while and I suppose that just made me lose it."

James smiled sadly and searched her face.

"What?" she whispered.

"I - I just...gods, Lily, do you know what I've been through?" he asked her, running a hand through his already untidy hair, therefore making it stand on end.

"I can imagine," she said softly.

"No, I really don't think you can," James said. Lily didn't miss the hint of sharpness in his voice.

"I mean, you - that day, when you told me you hated me?"

Lily closed her eyes.

"Fine with me! I don't want to be your friends!" Sirius, Remus, and Peter ran out after Gwen, but James stayed put.

"Go away, Potter," Lily said icily.

"Lily, what-"

"James, I said GO AWAY! I never want to see you again! I hate you!" She buried her face in her hands.

"Fine!" he yelled, and went to follow his friends.


"Yes," Lily said shakily, coming back to the present. She began fiddling with a loose thread on her robes.

"Lily, I felt like my heart had been ripped out and stepped on," James said frankly.

Lily sucked in her breath. "Me too," she whispered, praying that he could just drop it and they could leave and act as though that hadn't happened. This was the topic she had avoided at all costs - and here she was having it with the person she least wanted to have it with.

But of course, he had to discuss it further.

"And-" here he paused, and gulped barely audibly, "and it took every fiber in my body to not just gather you up in my arms and kiss you until you saw reason."

"You - you mean you liked me?" she looked up at him quickly.

"Liked? Lily, I've never liked you," he said slowly.

Lily dropped her head and fought the tears. Of course he didn't like her! She was - was nothing to him...

"I loved you, Lily. I've loved you since, well, I think it was - yes, it was when we ran into each other that day in Hogsmeade before first year."

"No - no James, you-you don't mean it," she said, refusing to meet his eyes.

"Of course I do. I wouldn't ever lie to you, Lily."

"No James! We're too young to know what love is!" she practically yelled, standing up quickly.

James stood up quickly as well. "Then I don't know what the hell I'm feeling for you, but it's definitely more than just like. Please, just try me," he begged.

Her brain was screaming at her to say, "I love you too!" but her traitorous voice said, "I'm not ready," instead.

James's face fell, but he quickly put a determined look on. "Then I'll wait. You say the word, and I'll kiss you senseless like I've wanted to do for four years."

"Really? You'd...you'd wait for me like that?" Lily asked incredulously.

His gaze was so intense that she couldn't have looked away if she tried. "Of course. I'd do anything for you."

"It - it might be a while..." she said weakly.

"I'll wait," he said firmly, and Lily knew that the discussion was over, and he wasn't going to change his mind. She reached up and hugged him tightly. Words couldn't even begin to express the gratitude she felt towards him for not pushing her. They stood in each other's arms for ages, until finally Lily pulled back.

James looked down at her and held out his hand. She took it and felt a tingle of pleasure run up her arm, giving her goose bumps. They walked in silence; each lost in their own thoughts. When they reached the closed doors to the Great Hall, James looked down at her again.

"Don't forget, Lily, I'll always be here for you. If you need a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, you come to me. Even if-" his throat constricted, but he forced himself to continue. "Even if you decide you don't want to be with me, I'll always be here."

"Thank you," she whispered, afraid she would begin to cry again.

He tenderly wiped away her tears and squeezed her hand, and with that, they entered the Great Hall to many murderous stares from each other's "fan clubs".