Sleeping Together

"Remus? What are you doing?" Sirius' mumbled sleepily.

"I want to sleep with you." Remus was standing next to Sirius' bed in his pajamas and bare feet and shivering.

Sirius turned his head to look at the clock and realised it was too dark to see. He fumbled for his wand and pointed it at the wall. "Lumos," he muttered. "Remus, it's after 2 in the morning! Go back to bed!"

James rolled over, facing the other boys. "Turn out the bloody light," he mumbled before falling asleep again.

"What?" Sirius was too groggy to understand the request and had forgotten the lit wand, which had fallen on the floor with a clatter.

Remus picked his wand up from his bedside table and pointed it at Sirius' wand on the floor. "Finite incantatum." His eyes never left the other boy's sleeping form. "Sirius?" The room was silent except for Peter's creaking mattress above him. "Sirius?" Still there was no reply.

Remus shrugged and climbed into his boyfriend's bed, pulling the top blanket over him, and cuddled up to Sirius' chest.

"What are you doing?" Sirius whined.

Remus whispered against his chest, "I want to sleep with you."

"Bloody bollocks, Moony!" Sirius moved away.

"What?"

"I'm not going to shag you, Remus!"

"Sleep, idiot. I want to sleep with you. Not have sex," Remus exclaimed.

Sirius stretched and groaned. "And what's wrong with your bed?"

"Nothing," he said, but his voice quavered.

"So you want to sleep here because...?"

Remus snuggled closer to him. "I want to be with you. Please?"

"You're with me all bloody day, Moony."

"And I don't want it to end," Remus murmured.

Sirius sighed. "I'm really tired, Remus. Do we need to do this right now?"

"We're not doing anything, Pads," Remus said. "Just sleeping."

"Whatever will Prongs and Wormtail say in the morning when they find us cuddled together in bed?" Sirius asked, gesturing towards their sleeping roommates.

Remus turned away from his boyfriend and stared at the bottom of Peter's bed above him. "It's not like they don't know we're seeing each other or anything."

"Well, of course they know. But..." Sirius broke off.

Remus looked over at the lump that was James and at his own empty bed, and then he turned his head to look at Sirius. "If I were a girl, you'd have no problem sharing a bed with me."

Sirius groaned and turned away, pulling the covers up over his head.

"Well?" Remus asked.

Sirius was silent for a moment. Then he yanked the covers down and glared at Remus. "No, I wouldn't have a problem with it, Moony."

"Well, thanks, mate. Now I know where I stand then." Remus threw the covers off and marched back to his own bed, his cheeks pink. He sat down and huddled under his quilt.

"I didn't say I was going to do it," Sirius muttered suddenly from across the room.

"No, but it's clearly what you want," Remus replied.

"For the love of Merlin, do you have to do this here? At this time of night?" James exclaimed. He leaned over the edge of his bed and tried to hit Remus with a pillow.

"No, we don't," said Remus, avoiding his friend's clumsy attack. "I'm going to sleep now. In my own bed. Where Sirius wants me to be. Because I'm not a girl."

"Give me a break," said Sirius. "You're sure as hell acting like one."

"Both of you. Get the hell out, now." James' voice was cold. He had sat up in his bed and was glaring at each of them in turn. "Out." He pointed at the door.

"Hell no, I'm not leaving," said Sirius. "Remus is the one acting like a baby. If he'd shut up for a minute, I'd be fast asleep like a good boy."

"I don't fucking care, Padfoot," James growled.

"What's going on?" came a voice. Peter had rolled over in bed.

"I'm kicking these two out," replied James.

"Why?"

"Because they won't shut the hell up. And I need my sleep." He turned to Remus and Sirius. "Need I remind you that we're up against Slytherin tomorrow? Do you want us to win? Because we won't win if one of our chasers falls asleep on his bloody broom!"

Remus jumped out of bed, taking his quilt with him. "Fine. I'm going then. Happy?"

"Delirious." James looked at Sirius, who was getting drowsy again. "You too."

"Me? I'm going to sleep, mate. I'm hardly going to argue all night with him gone, am I?" he asked, watching as Remus slipped out the dorm room door.

"He's your boyfriend. Go kiss and make up, or whatever it is you do with each other, which I'd rather not know about."

"Oh, nice," Sirius muttered.

"Go."

"Fine. I know when I'm not wanted." Sirius leaped out of bed and out the door, muttering under his breath.

The Gryffindor common room was cold and mostly dark. He could see Remus huddled on the sofa in front of the fireplace. At least, he was pretty sure it was Remus under the quilt.

He hurried down the stairs and over to the human-shaped lump in front of the fire. "It's bloody cold. Let me under," he muttered, grabbing the quilt, but Remus resisted his efforts.

"Look who wants to cuddle!" came a muffled voice. "You couldn't kick me out of your bed fast enough, but when it's cold, suddenly you're fighting to sleep with me. Talk about a fair weather friend."

"Remus, please!" Sirius begged. "There are parts of my body shrinking that I'd really rather didn't shrink, if it's all the same to you. If I stand here much longer, I won't be much of a man at all."

Remus sat up, pulling the quilt down over his head and lifting up one side. "Fine. Get under."

Siirus wasted no time in sitting down on the sofa and huddling under the quilt. "Why's it so bloody cold, anyway?" he asked, noticing the fire blazing in the hearth. "There's a fire!"

"Because I just lit it a few minutes ago, didn't I?" Remus rolled his eyes.

"Oh. Yeah." Sirius frowned.

Remus' eyes narrowed. "So tell me something, Sirius. If you want a girl, and I act like a girl, why isn't that enough for you?"

"I don't want a girl."

"But you don't want me."

"I most certainly do. Although not so much tonight, if you don't mind my saying so. You're being a real bitch tonight. You know, I'd put it down to PMS, but you changed last week."

"You know, you sure have a curious way of treating your boyfriends," Remus pointed out.

Sirius laughed. "Boyfriends? You speak as if there's a pattern of behaviour. Need I remind you that you're my first boyfriend, Moony?"

"Well, perhaps I'll be your last. If what you want is a girl in your bed, I'm afraid I won't be of much use to you."

"I already told you I don't want a girlfriend. Look, I'm bloody tired. Can't we talk about this tomorrow?" Sirius stretched out like a cat.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you? No, I think we'll talk about it tonight. We'll talk about it because I'm not going to be able to sleep until I get a straight answer from you, and I use the word straight loosely." Remus smirked.

"OK, what's the question exactly? Let's just get this over with, and then we can both sleep."

"If you're dating me, why would you rather sleep with a girl?"

"I've told you a dozen times. I never said I wanted to."

"But you did, Sirius. I asked you if you would share your bed with me if I were a girl, and you said yes."

"It's not the same thing." Sirius yawned.

"It most certainly is. If I'm a boy, you won't sleep with me. But if I'm a girl, you will. Sorry, mate, but that says to me that you'd rather sleep with a girl. This isn't difficult logic."

"But I don't want to sleep with a girl. I just said that if you were a girl, I'd sleep with you."

Remus screwed up his face in concentration, and then he shook his head. "Explain it to me. Because it sounds to me like I can never be enough for you."

"If anything, you're too much."

"Too much what?"

"Too male."

Remus chuckled bitterly. "And here I thought you were gay. Easy mistake to make, really, when you snog me repeatedly every day."

"I am..." But Sirius stopped and looked away. "I am," he finished lamely.

"You're what? A git? A pureblood? An animagus?"

"No! Well, yes! Except the git part."

"What else are you, Pads?"

"This is stupid," Sirius muttered.

Remus laughed. "Not as stupid as a gay boy wasting his time with a straight boy, I can assure you."

"I'm not straight."

"Well, what are you then?"

"I'm g--"

"Good in bed? Gryffindor's heir? Git-like?" Remus suggested.

"I'm gay, damnit! I'm gay!" Sirius nearly shouted. Then he turned pink and looked away.

Remus' eyes widened in surprise, and then he smiled. "Are you really? I think you're confused."

"I'm not confused. I..."

Remus put his hand on Sirius' shoulder. "It's OK if you are, Pads. I was confused once, too."

"I'm not confused. I've always liked blokes."

"Just not me, then."

"I'm dating you, aren't I? Of course I like you. Hell, you make me go all weak in the knees, Moony."

"So you're gay, and we're dating, and you like me. But you won't share your bed with me because I'm a boy. And you won't take me to the Yule Ball," Remus said. "Maybe you're not confused, but I sure as hell am."

"That stuff's different," muttered Sirius.

"So what is it? You're ashamed of me?"

"No!"

Remus was silent. "I think you're ashamed of being gay."

"I..."

"You're only homosexual when no one's around to see it."

"I..."

"You're afraid of the other boys teasing you the way James does. You're afraid it will make you less of a man."

Sirius stared at the fire. "I am."

"Then I suppose I'm not a real man, either," Remus mused. "Well heck, I'm only half human, too. An effeminate, half-human man with PMS. Boy, I really got the short end of the stick, didn't I?"

Sirius grinned despite himself. "But you're my effeminate, half-human man with PMS." He put his arm around Remus, blinking sleepily, and pulled him close.

"Sirius? I understand if you're having trouble with being gay. I went through the same thing. But you should also know that I really don't want to wait around forever. I don't want to stand on the sidelines my whole life, watching other couples having romantic moments and forever pretending that we're just good friends."

"Neither do I. But...I guess you're going to have to be patient."

"Well, I'm good at that," said Remus, grinning.

"What a pair we make." Siirus squeezed Remus' shoulders.

Remus yawned. "Sirius? I'm tired. You're tired. Let's sleep already. We're hardly going to turn you into a flaming queen by breakfast tomorrow."

"OK," Sirius replied, lying down on the sofa. He looked at Remus, who was eyeing him with one eyebrow raised. "Well?"

"Well?"

"Are we sleeping or aren't we?" Sirius asked, holding out his arms. Remus nodded, smiling softly. "Good. And bring the quilt with you."

Remus grabbed hold of the quilt and pulled it over them as he snuggled up against his boyfriend.

"Night, Moony," Sirius whispered, kissing his cheek.

And all of Gryffindor house found them sleeping there the next morning.