Phases of Change

Chapter 2 - Denial

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The next morning, Harry woke with a heavy burden on his chest. It took him a second to realize that it wasn’t a burden at all; it was Dobby. He groped around on his night stand until he found his glasses, and he put them on, his eyes still focusing on the dim outline of the house-elf.

“D-dobby, what do you want?” he asked, sitting up and looking at the clock.

6:30. Great.

“Dobby is sorry that he awakened you, Harry Potter, sir, but he was to give you this message,” he said in his squeaky voice.

He handed Harry a little envelope, and vanished with a ‘pop.’ Harry looked around, confused. He got up, and made his way to the common room, still in his night clothes.

It was deserted, and right it should be. No one sane was up at this hour of their own will. He made his way to a puffy chair near the fire, and examined the letter.

It was a thick parchment, and on the front in silver lettering was ‘Harry.’ It didn’t look like anyone’s writing that he knew of. He slid his finger up the back carefully, and tugged it gently open. It was only half of a page, but still had a lot of content. Eagerly, he read:

Dear Harry,

You’ve been on my mind ever since 3rd year. I’m sorry that I’ve never told you before now... I know that you’re going out with Cho, but I had to tell you. [Harry scoffed, “I’m not going out with Cho!”] I’ll never be able to explain how much you mean to me, and I hope that one day, you might be able to accept that I can’t live without you. Until then, please write to me, it’s the only way that I’ll be able to cope with not being near you. If you don’t want to write me, I’ll understand completely. No matter the circumstances, however, you can’t keep me from desiring you. I’m sorry about waking you up so early to read this, if you haven’t fallen back asleep. Please get back to me?

Sincerely,

Your secret admirer.

Harry turned it over, hoping there was something on the back. What? They hadn’t even signed it! He would die with curiosity. This person... they couldn’t live without him. Could Draco have been telling him the truth about joining to save him? That would make sense. Except, Draco had been a jerk in 3rd year, he hadn’t liked Harry.

He went back to his dorm quickly, got dressed, and returned to the common room with a quill and parchment.

Dear Admirer,

This is weird, because I’ve never really had a note like that before. The timing was okay, I was about to get up anyways. [Harry felt guilty for lying.] Will you tell me who you are sometime? I hate not knowing something. Yeah, of course I’ll write to you. It’s kind of fun to have a friend that I don’t know. By the way, I’m not going out with Cho... Well, it’s early so I really can’t think. Write back!

From,

Harry

He re-read it, and sent it off with Hedwig, who nipped his ear affectionately before taking off.

He smiled, and turned to the stairway as he heard someone descending.

It was Akai, the girl he had briefly met the previous evening. She was wearing her hair in two braids that day. She smiled, and walked towards a sofa. Harry smiled back, but he was too anxious to feel happy. He was going to watch for Hedwig at breakfast post, and when she came in, he would see who she went to. Of course, he was mostly sure that it was Draco, but he just had to be certain.

“Hi,” he said, uncrossing his legs, and placing the writing materials on the table.

“Good morning,” Akai replied, taking a seat, and looking through her large bag.

She pulled out a timetable, and glanced over it. She handed it to Harry, who took it from her, and looked over it too.

“All the Gryffindor seventh years have the same classes,” he explained.

“Oh, so I’m in Hermione’s and Ron’s classes as well!” she said happily.

At the same moment, Hermione and Ron appeared from their dorms, looking very sleepy, and unwilling for school; that was an amazing first for Hermione, who was always ready for work.

“Good morning, sunshines,” Harry said, laughing at the two.

They grunted, and grabbed seats by Harry. Ron looked at the access paper and quill.

“Have you written Sirius lately?” he asked, glancing over at Akai, who he just noticed was there.

Harry nodded. He had written Sirius before the beginning of school.

“He said he would come to see us this month, and he has news for us.”

Ron yawned, and nodded sleepily.

“Well, what’s first this morning?” he asked, looking at the timetable that Akai was putting away.

“Transfiguration, and then Potions,” she answered. Ron groaned.

“Perfect start to a morning,” he said sarcastically.

-------------------

Draco was just sitting down to breakfast, when he saw Harry and company enter the Hall. It took him a moment to realize that there were four people. Granger, Harry, Weasel, and... some other girl. He couldn’t see her face though. He strained to see, but she was sitting behind someone big.

He began eating, a little anxiously. He was really hoping that Harry had written back to him.

It was then that hundreds of owls swooped into the room. Most of them were carrying packages of things that students had left behind. He saw his own eagle amongst the crowd. It flew low, and dropped a small box of sweets onto his lap.

He sighed. It was all a facade really; his father didn’t love him at all. He began to eat again unhappily, when another owl dropped a letter onto his food. He looked up for long enough to see a snowy owl flying out the window. His heart did a double-take, and he shoved the letter deep into his robes.

On the other side of the room, Harry was staring across, not believing that the letter had indeed landed, so to speak, at his enemy’s feet. He swallowed the rest of his orange juice, and stood up.

“I’m going to go back to the common room... I forgot something,” he said. The rest of them stood up too.

“We’ll come too, we’re done,” Ron said, tucking in his chair.

Draco had a two second glance of the mysterious girl as she stood. That was all it took though.

“Akai?” he said in a whisper.

-------------------------

If that was really her, he had to talk to her. If she would let him, that was. He followed them out of the Great Hall. As he opened the door, the four turned their heads around. Akai’s eyes went wide, and then back to normal.

“Jerk,” she muttered, glaring at Draco. Ron’s eyes widened.

“Love you too,” Draco retorted, smirking. Ron, Hermione, and Harry looked very confused.

The tension grew around them until Akai and Draco both burst into smiles. Since when does Draco smile? The three thought, their mouths slightly gaping. Akai finally ran from the stairs over to Draco and embraced him hard, knocking the wind out of him. Harry and Hermione both felt a surge of jealousy watching their hug, but ignored it, biting their lips.

“Akai,” Draco said, stepping back to look at her. “You haven’t changed a bit.”

She smiled.

“Nor have you, Draco dearest.” She pushed a lock of hair out of his face. Harry clenched his fists. Looking over he saw Hermione do the same. He smiled inwardly.

“I see you’ve been sorted in with them,” Draco commented, accentuating the ‘them’ as if they were some sort of disgusting bug.

“They’re not bad,” she said quietly. She leaned in towards his ear, and whispered.

“Ugh,” Draco said, making a face. “You have bad taste.”

“No, you have bad taste,” she replied, looking at her fingernails.

“And how would you know?” he asked, smirking.

“Oh, right, never mind.” He frowned, “Damn it, I forgot about that.”

Akai smirked back, and tapped her head. She pushed him against the door.

“I don’t know how you could like men,” she whispered, shuddering.

He laughed.

“That’s rich, coming from a woman,” he said, pushing her back gently, until they were standing the right way again.

“But, I didn’t come her to talk about sexual preferences,” he said quietly.

“I came here to ask why you’re in this school, as apposed to being in Japan,” he asked, glancing up Harry, and blushing slightly. He let go of her, and she smiled knowingly.

“Well, I got so mad that you didn’t come visit me, that I came here to hunt you down,” she answered.

“I’m really sorry!” Draco said, “My dad didn’t want me to leave the house over the summer, I don’t think he trusted me that much.”

Akai pouted, “I missed you, you know.”

Draco apologized, and looked as his watch.

“We should probably get to class,” he said, bowing.

She nodded, and bowed back.

-----------------

When Draco departed, the three burst into a million questions.

“Where do you know Draco from, then?” Ron asked, incredulously.

“We were betrothed upon birth, but when I was 14 I told Draco I couldn’t marry him. Draco agreed, and our parents, being the loving people they are told us we didn’t have to,” she said sarcastically.

All three of them realized that Akai’s parents must be just about as nice as Lucius Malfoy. That didn’t stop them from missing the first comment.

“You were betrothed?” Harry asked, his eyes wide.

Inside, he was just happy that Draco wasn’t going to have to marry Akai. Akai nodded.

“We knew each other from birth, and we’ve been best friends since. I haven’t seen him for about a year though. He said he would come and visit if he could, but he didn’t," she explained.

“So he’s single,” she said pointedly.

Harry noticed that she had directed that comment at him, and he had the sickening feeling that Akai could read minds.

That would explain what she had said earlier. She winked at him, and his mouth fell open.

Thank Gods he had taken those Occlumency classes, or else she would know a whole lot more. He concentrated, and closed his mind. Akai pouted.

----------------------

The first class went by smoothly; Akai was introduced to the other students, and Hermione was asked to catch her up on some small things she had missed. The two didn’t seem to mind.

It was second class that had Harry worried. The meeting in the Hall was so brief, and Harry hadn’t been forced to confront Draco. He still couldn’t believe what he had done.

The four walked out of the classroom together, and showed Akai the way to the dungeons. They entered and took their seats, as the Slytherins filed in after them. Harry caught Draco’s eye for a sliver of a second, before they both turned away, blushing.

Professor Snape entered through the stone passageway, his robes billowing out magically behind him. This was truthfully the first time Harry had seen Snape so far; he’d avoided looking at him at the Beginning of term Feast. Akai, who was sitting beside Harry whispered in his ear.

“That’s my Godfather,” she said, pointing to Snape.

Harry, Hermione, and Ron’s jaws dropped.

“He was my father’s best friend in Hogwarts.”

They waited for a second for it to sink into their heads.

“So you’re like... half related to him!” Ron said, astonished.

“I’m not related by blood, Ron,” she pointed out.

“Thank Gods!”

“Sorry to break up your little private discussion Pott–” Snape began, before he saw Akai.

Someone should have brought a camera. Snape actually smiled at Akai, who smiled back, and waved. There were collective gasps around the room that they chose to ignore.

“Welcome, Ame,” he said, almost warmly. She smiled again.

He collected himself, and went to his desk. He couldn’t seem to emotionally attached with a student.    

“Now to begin this year, I want no fooling around, and no idiotic mistakes. It’s the last year here, thank Gods, and I wont have to see any of your faces next year,” he began.

He thought for a second.

“Except you, Mr.Longbottom, who I may keep back, just to see your Grandmother’s expression,” he added cruelly. Neville gulped, and the Slytherins snickered immaturely.

Harry looked over at Draco, who was probably the only one not laughing. He stared for a second, taking in the sight before him. Why did he have to be so good looking?

‘No! No way, there’s NO way that you like Draco!!’ Harry’s mind yelled at him. He cursed himself for his thoughts.

Draco sensed the familiar feeling of eyes on him. Of course, people were always looking at him, seeing as he was so gorgeous. He stretched out, and panned around the room, pretending not to be looking for anything.

His eyes, of course, were met by Harry’s, who strengthened his glare, unwilling to lose, and turn away. Draco winked. Harry’s eyes flickered, and his throat become dry. Draco smiled inwardly; Harry would never win.

-----------------

Class was over fast; Harry stole a few glances at Draco, who in turn, stole them back. Snape dismissed all but Akai, who motioned for them to leave, and that she would catch up.

“Akai,” he said, embracing her, when the other students had left.

“Hi, Severus,” she said.

“How’s your father doing?” he asked, sitting down, and motioning to the chair in front of him.

Akai sat down, and crossed her legs. She looked him in the eye; probably the only student who could do so.

“He’s alright... He really wanted me to graduate at his old school, so he sent me here,” she explained. Snape nodded knowingly.

“Are you okay here? Apparently you were sorted into Gryffindor. What a shame,” he commented. She laughed.

“It’s been fine. I’ve met some new friends, and I’m settling in well,” she said reassuringly.

“Akai...”

“Fine, I’ve only been here for a day, and I miss my dad!” she said, pouting.

Snaped smirked.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay with Mr.Malfoy? I could have that arranged, you know,” he pressed.

“It’s alright, Sev, it’s no problem,” she replied, shaking her head. “Don’t worry about me.”

-------------------

Akai met up with the trio as she walked out of the dungeon.

“What did he want?” Hermione asked protectively.

“He was just asking if I’m okay, and if my dad is doing fine,” she answered truthfully.

“I still can’t believe that you’re related to that creep,” Ron said, making a face.

“He’s not bad if you get to know him; and I’ve known him my entire life,” she said.

“Hmmm... I still think he’s a creep, how about you, Remus?”

The four looked around. Harry broke into a smiled, and ran to hug his Godfather, who was standing beside Remus.

“Ahh, take it easy Harry, I’m an old man,” Sirius said, winking.

Hermione and Ron shook Remus’s hand, and Akai stood there.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t see you,” Sirius said, looking around Ron. Akai stepped forward.

“I’m Ame Akai... are you teachers here?” she asked, curiously.

“I used to be,” Remus answered. “I’m Remus Lupin.”

“And I’m Sirius Black... you’ve probably heard of me,” he said deviously.

She gave her trademark smile.

“It’s nice to meet you both.”

“Well, we’ll see you guys tonight, we have to go talk to Dumbledore,” Remus said, tugging at Sirius’ sleeve. He growled.

“Fine...” he muttered, following after Lupin.

“They seem nice,” Akai said.

----------------------

After the afternoon classes, the four dropped their bags off in the dorms, and retired to the common room. Most of the teachers, spare Snape, hadn’t given them homework, seeing as it was only the first day back.

“Ah, I always hate the first day back,” Ron said, flopping into an armchair. Hermione nodded, and sat down beside him.

Harry came down from the stairs carrying his Firebolt.

“Hey, I’m going to go take a couple laps around the field; I haven’t been on a broom for a while,” he informed them, slinging the Firebolt over his shoulder.

The group nodded, and Hermione resumed talking with Akai.

Harry made his way out to the pitch, and looked around. It looked the same as it had before the maze had been put up; the way he remembered it. He sighed and mounted his broom, looking out into the afternoon sky.

He pushed off from the ground and immediately felt the air surge around him, as he cut through it. For him, it was the most free feeling. He flew for what must have been hours, until the sun was beginning to set.    

He was just about to land when he saw a familiar person walk towards him on the pitch.

“Potter,” Draco said, stopping.

“Malfoy...” Harry replied, unsure of himself.

He took in a breath. He had to ask Draco about the other night.

“I’m sorry that I ki–” he started, but was cut off.

“Great game, isn’t it?” Draco said. Small talk.

Great, he was avoiding the subject... well then.. Harry would just have to bring it up his self.

He suddenly had an idea. He landed and walked up to Draco.

“Know what’s a better game?” he asked, tilting his head innocently.

Draco swallowed, and blushed.

“Chess?” he replied hopefully.

Harry smirked, and looked at his fingernails.

“It’s a Muggle game called ‘Nervous?’... have you played it?” he asked, stepping closer.

Draco tensed. Nervous would explain exactly how he was feeling. He shook his head, not trusting himself to speak.

Harry racked his brain for the reason behind his sudden courage. Nope, nothing there. He just needed to know whether or not Draco was just playing with his emotions.

“You could show me who to play,” Draco suggested tensely.

Harry smirked again. He nodded and drew closer, placing his hand on Draco’s waist.

“Nervous?” he asked quietly.

Draco found his voice.

“No,” he replied, staring back as fiercely as Harry was to him.

The raven-haired boy stepped closer, and put his other hand on Draco’s neck.

“Nervous?” he asked again.

Draco shook his head slowly.

Harry brought their bodies closer, and moved his hand to Draco’s stomach.

“Nervous?” he repeated.

“N-no,” Draco replied unsurely.

Harry brought his nose to the other boy’s, and brushed his lips against the ones in front of him.

He wrapped his arms loosely around Draco’s waist.

“Nervous?” he asked one last time.

“Yeah,” Draco answered, heart beating a mile per minute.

Harry smiled.

“You win,” Draco stated.

He brought his lips quickly to Harry’s and ran his hand up his spine. Harry shuddered, but didn’t part their lips. He deepened the kiss, and ran his fingers through the soft, silvery hair. Draco moaned, and entered Harry’s mouth, meeting with the unmatchable flavor. A soft, sweet flavor. An addictive flavor.

What seemed like hours later, the two broke apart, blushing.

“Wow... I’m nervous,” Harry stated, biting his lip.

Draco laughed.

“We’d better go...” he said, brushing his hand through his hair.

“Yeah... I’ll go first,” Harry replied, astonished that he could speak.

“Bye,” Draco said, staying behind on the pitch, as Harry left.

Harry nodded, and walked towards the castle, shaking.

‘Damn, damn, damn, damn... why did you do that?’ his mind screamed.

He was Harry Potter for Gods’ sake! He couldn’t run around kissing Malfoys! But he had... and he’d wanted it... loved the taste of those lips... loved...

‘NO!’

-------------------

Draco entered the Great Hall minutes after Harry had, and took his usual place, pretending as though nothing had happened. He glanced up and saw Harry staring at his plate. He wanted to scream across the room, asking if he could be any more obvious, but he decided against it. He still had to figure out his feelings for the boy.

‘Feelings? What, Draco? Malfoys don’t have feelings...’ his mind reminded him. He didn’t agree. What he was thinking definitely meant he had feelings. There was no other words. But how strong? He wouldn’t admit to himself that he loved Harry... he’d only kissed him twice... and he’d always been mean to the other boy. Of course, that was mostly because his father was Lord Voldemort’s wench, and he expectations to live up to.

Against his father’s word, he had attempted to make friends with Harry. When he turned him down, he could basically see his ego falling, and smashing to the ground. His ego, and his heart, actually.

All his life he’d been told things about Harry, and he wanted to meet the boy in person. From the stories grew a great respect, and longing. He tried to talk to Harry, tried to be nice to him, but those two, Granger and Weasel were always there, keeping Harry to themselves. Now that Voldemort was gone, he had no one to act like. He had no sense of self. Truthfully, that’s what he was    hoping Harry could help him with.

Maybe Harry shared his feelings. He’d decided to find out, and that’s where he was know. Actually, kissing Harry hadn’t cleared anything up. He felt truthfully quite dizzy, and even more confused.

-----------------

After dinner, Remus and Sirius came to where Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Akai were sitting.

“Hey, we were wondering if you could come with us for a second, if you’re done,” Remus asked, looking hopefully at Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

They nodded, and looked at Akai.

“We’ll be right back, I’ll meet you in the common room, okay?” Hermione asked.

“Okay, I’ll start my homework,” Akai replied happily.

They stood up, and Harry could have sworn for a second that Hermione and Akai were holding hands. He blinked, but their hands were at their sides. He shook it off, and followed the others with Remus and Sirius until they got to the Defense against the Dark Arts office. Remus held the door open for them, and Harry noticed the two suitcases lying in the corner.

They sat down, and Sirius closed the door behind them.

“Like I said in that last letter, Harry... we have some news for you,” he said, taking a seat beside Remus.

“Good news, or bad news?” Ron asked worriedly, looking at the two.

“Good, I guess,” Remus answered, placing a quill into a holder.

“Anyways, straight to the point, Remus and I are going to be co-teaching DADA this year,” Sirius rushed, smiling.

There were collective gasps from the three.

“That’s so great!” Hermione exclaimed, rushing forward to hug them.

“Well, we figured that Remus knows loads about logical stuff, and I know a lot about hands-on,” Sirius explained.

Harry was smiling.

“There’s something else, isn’t there. That’s not all you meant to tell us... You could have told us that in public,” he deduced.

Remus sighed.

“Never miss a beat, do you...” He laughed.

He looked at Sirius apprehensively, and blushed.

“Sirius and I are engaged.”

More collective gasps. Ron shrugged.

“I figured it was something like that,” he said, looking at Hermione’s bewildered face.

“I didn’t,” she commented.

Harry laughed.

“That’s great, you two!” he said, smiling at Hermione, who nodded.

“Yeah, really great,” she added, smiling.

------------------

They entered the common room, and spotted Akai on the other side of the room. The three stared at Parvati and Lavender, who were snogging on the couch. They walked past, and

“At the rate we’re going, there’s not going to be anyone straight left in the school,” Hermione commented, stepping over a footrest.        

Harry sighed.

“Hermione, you have no idea.”

TBC.......